0:03 - Apology and Reflection
1:23 - Navigating Criticism
5:24 - Friend Zone Dilemma
9:09 - The Concept of "Foodie Calls"
16:00 - Understanding Female Nature
22:06 - The Reality of Friend Zones
28:42 - The Impact of Female Standards
38:53 - Evaluating Deservedness
45:45 - The Complexity of Chemistry
58:47 - Predictors of Relationship Success
1:09:56 - The Influence of Outside Factors
1:21:59 - The Struggle for Truth
1:30:14 - Finding Quality Partners
1:38:58 - Closing Thoughts and Reflections
In this episode, I address my audience with a mix of reflections and personal anecdotes, initiating with an apology to a listener regarding my response to a previous question about vetting a potential spouse. I recognize that my tone was harsher than intended and, in light of this, offer to personally connect with that listener to make amends. Transparency and humility are important to me, and I believe acknowledging missteps publicly can foster a healthier community dynamic.
Transitioning from personal reflections, I dive into a thought-provoking query about the frustrations people experience when others critique their completed work without having contributed during its creation. I emphasize the significance of surrounding oneself with proactive individuals rather than those who dwell in a state of paralysis, as the latter can inadvertently drag you down. This leads into broader discussions about ambition, productivity, and the detrimental impact of surrounding oneself with unproductive or negative influences.
The conversation steers towards the complexities of human relationships, particularly the concept of being ‘friendzoned.’ I unpack this situation through various scenarios, advising listeners on how to recognize signs of their status in such relationships. It becomes evident to me that many men face profound emotional challenges when navigating the interplay between friendship and romantic interest. I explore the psychological dynamics at play, shedding light on manipulative patterns that emerge when one party does not reciprocate romantic feelings, effectively highlighting the importance of self-worth and taking proactive steps when necessary.
Further into the discussion, my focus shifts to societal expectations and the pressures placed on both men and women in romantic pursuits. I critique the media’s contribution to shaping unrealistic standards for relationships and partners, especially emphasizing how women are often cultured to have excessively high expectations, which can lead to a perpetual state of dissatisfaction. I draw parallels to broader societal norms and the impact these have on relationship dynamics.
As the episode continues, I explore the shifting landscape of dating today, where issues like emotional stability become paramount. I discuss how individuals can better assess potential partners by closely examining communication styles and conflict resolution strategies, which are critical indicators of compatibility. By reframing these dating challenges, I suggest that understanding and empathy towards each other's experiences in the dating realm could vastly improve the landscape for both men and women.
Towards the end of the episode, I encourage open discussions about personal experiences and observations regarding attraction and societal pressures. I urge listeners to engage in an exercise of empathy, envisioning relationships and dating scenarios from the perspective of the opposite sex. This practice can aid in recognizing the shared dilemmas in contemporary dating and can foster deeper connections.
Ultimately, I seek to equip my listeners with insights into navigating the complexities of relationships, emphasizing the importance of self-assessment, confidence, and the need for both partners to engage genuinely in the pursuit of meaningful connections.
[0:01] Good evening, everybody. It's Stefan Molyneux from Freedomain.
[0:04] It is Friday, the 18th of October, 2024. Let me start with something a little unusual, I suppose, and that is an apology, an apology to, my apology, to the listener who asked about how to vet a potential wife last, on Wednesday. I did rake him a little bit over the coals. I got an email from him, and I was too harsh. I absolutely apologize. I think I was letting some donation frustrations get the better of me, and it was unfair and wrong. I really do apologize. And to that person, I'll obviously send the email as well. I give you absolutely a free private call.
[0:48] Give you a free private call. So I do apologize for that. That was too harsh. I don't have an update about the Mississauga meetup tomorrow. Something came up this week, which I'm afraid we'll have to push it. So I don't have anything yet. And, uh, so yes, sorry, sorry to that listener. Um, I let my irritation get the better of me and I think it was unfair, uh, what I said. And so I, uh, a public apology. And since I didn't publicly rake the guy over the coals a little bit, public apology. And you get a free private call, uh, to make up for it because that was the wrong approach. And, uh, I do, I do apologize unreservedly.
[1:24] All right, so let's get to your questions here. And I also don't want people to feel like, oh, it's a big question, but am I going to get right to the course, which is unfair, right? All right. Hello, Stefan and community. Question of if time allows. Why is it that when you do a job, no matter how big or small, a person mostly close to you asks, why did you do it that way? I want to scream when I hear this. the job is already done, and it can't be changed without a complete tear down and start over. That person wasn't there to help or assist, so now they start over. That person wasn't there.
[2:06] So now they have to critique the way it was done. What the heck? Is it me, or would that annoy most people? Yes, it is. So why did you do it that way is a way of sowing fear, uncertainty and doubt in people's minds. It's a way of showing, so why did they do it? Well, why did you do it that way? It's just a way of making you... There's a lot of people who are paralyzed in their lives, and what they do is they kind of spread this paralysis to other people. It's really, really important when you're, if you try to do anything important in this world, something that requires some risk, some ambition, some whatever, right? It's really, really important that you don't surround yourself with stuck people. Stuck people, like paralyzed people, paralyzed people, right? Hurt people, hurt people, paralyzed people, paralyze people. And so, yeah. Okay.
[3:08] So, if you are trying to do something, you have to be around people who are doing things, right? I mean, if you want to win a race, which is a relay race, then you have to have people around you who are actually practicing. If you want to be in a play, you have to be around people who are ambitious and learn their lines. You can't achieve more success than the least successful person around you. It's a collective thing, right? You can't achieve more success than the least successful person around you, right? And the other thing too, of course, never take criticism from people you would never take advice from, right? That's sort of an old, an old maxim, right? So the question when you say, why did you do it that way? What you have to do is evaluate whether that person is trying to get anything done in their life. And if you're going to have the sideline nitpickers, right? If you're going to have the sideline nitpickers, they're generally not doing anything with their life because people who are in motion and getting things done with their life don't have time to nag you and don't have any particular impulse to do so so um don't be if you want to achieve anything in your life you have to drop the deadbeats you have to drop the deadbeats.
[4:20] I thought it was a little harsh, so I appreciate you seeing a public apology and restitution. I don't see that from a lot of public figures. Well, I'll tell you, I didn't even get it. I mean, this is, I just, I had a bit of a blind spot. I mean, it happens and all I can do, you know, what do I do? If you wrong someone, you make an apology, you don't make excuses and you make restitution and here's how you work to have it not happen again. And it was actually, so I was telling the story of my live stream and my daughter, when I said this guy annoyed me with this big question and no donation and so on. And she was like, but don't you give your work out for free? Don't you work for free in general?
[5:00] And I felt annoyed at her. And then I'm like, well, that's kind of unarguable. And the guy was a subscriber. So, anyway, I mean, it was Izzy who caught it, and I appreciated that from her and thanked her for that. And so, yes, that's out of the mouth of babes, right? You never, you know, it's really important to learn from your kids too, right?
[5:24] All right, so everybody gets a free pass. You can ask your biggest questions, and I will not only not complain. Oh, no, someone in a philosophy show is asking you a big philosophical question. Now, listen, I can tell you why I was annoyed, but I don't want it to sound like excuses. So maybe I'll do that another time. I don't want to say why I was annoyed because then it sounds like I'm making an excuse, which I don't want to make. But there's reasons for it, but the reasons do not justify the behavior. All right. So yes, everybody gets as big a questions as they want. You don't have to donate a penny. And I will take them on with verve and gusto. So, all right. Hello, Stef and community. Oh, sorry, that's that question. We have, um, hey, Stef, I was friendzoned by a woman about seven months ago. We basically stopped talking after that. I'm following your advice about being useful to people and asking myself, how do I make their lives better?
[6:16] The last week, I've been helping her move house because she asked. I'm making myself useful doing all the handyman tasks she reciprocates by making me food and helping when necessary. We chat for hours and have all the same values. How do I know if I'm still in the friend zone or not? All right, hit me with a why if you've ever been lost in the friend zone. Let me know. So I've been friendzone-ish. I've been friendzone-ish once or twice.
[6:54] And hit me with a Y. I just want to know how relevant this is to everyone. Thanks, James. Have a good evening. Good evening. And I'm going to check the chat over in Rumble 2 here. If you want to say anything, you are welcome to do so.
[7:15] All right uh no yes okay so how do you know if you're in the friend zone i was friend by one about seven months ago we basically stopped talking after that so if you are romantically in interested in a woman get to know her in my humble opinion right get to know her and then Then... Shoot your shot. If she's not romantically interested, then you need to move on. It's painful. I know it's like ripping Velcro, right? But you need to move on because if for whatever reason, she's not romantically interested, and let's say it's entirely to do with her, right? It's her fault, her issue. You're a great guy for whatever reason, right? So if she's not romantically interested in you, then really your only option is to become manipulative. That's one of the reasons why sticking around in the friend zone is pretty bad. Because you have almost no choice but to become manipulative. In other words, you have almost no choice but to continue to want to date her, right? You're going to continue to want to date her, and everything's going to be kind of angled towards that.
[8:36] And in order to avoid being manipulative it's usually a good idea to velcro out and, try and find somebody else they try and find somebody else so unfortunately there is have you have you heard of this phrase the foodie call i just found out about this i told my daughter I was in possession of a brand new piece of slang and she tensed up because I don't know how to use the word riz.
[9:09] But a foodie call. So a booty call is when, of course, you call some woman at one in the morning just to have sex. But a foodie call is when a woman just wants to go out on a date because she's hungry with no actual interest in the guy. So that's called a foodie call. Now, the media as a whole caters to women. The media and the market as a whole caters to women. Now.
[9:43] Women like to have a Hiram. Not all, right? But in general, women like to have a Hiram. And a Hiram is just a bunch of guys she's got around, who are interested in her, available to do favors for her. She can cry on their shoulders about the leather-jacketed, tattooed guy who broke her heart. She can get them to help her move. She can get them to come over and fix things and so on. And she can also, it's not just predatory in that way, She can also, if she's lonely, she can have them come over, they can have a meal, they can chat, they can watch a show, and so on. So, a lot of women like having the Hiram around, right? And because women outbred men throughout most of her evolution considerably, it's more common for men to be in pursuit and more common for women to be receiving that pursuit. So the media, which is focused on serving the needs of greedy women, what does it do? Well, what it does is it puts forward the idea, always, almost always, it puts forward the idea that.
[11:01] Friend zoning can lead to love, right? So the typical story is the boy and the girl grow up together and they go through an awkward phase. Then she becomes beautiful and he becomes mid, maybe a little bit above mid, and he laughs at her jokes and he visits her at work and they go and do the stuff that she likes to do. And he holds her handbag when she shops for leggings, with which to impress some doofus, and he pines and yearns for her, and she doesn't see it.
[11:42] She's just naive. She thinks about when they met, and they made mud pies together, Haitian style, and ate them, and they sat in the treehouse reading comic books and making jokes to each other, and they showed each other memes when they were 12, and they went through the awkward phase, and then she dates a whole bunch of guys and he's mad and upset at the guys she dates but she's just out there exploring herself and working on herself and then eventually later on boy don't you know after she's tired of the bikers and the jocks she she looks suddenly it all comes into focus across the stained wooden table in a corner rustic cafe. She looks across the table and she realizes that her heart opens all at once like a supernova of acceptance. She realizes that everything she's been looking for was right in front of her nose the whole time. And they get together.
[12:42] Now, why is this put out as a story? We've seen this about a zillion times. You can look at All this kind of stuff, right? All over the place, from here to eternity, right? So the reason that this is put out is to give power to women over men. That's why it's put out. That's what it's there for. And it is there to make sure that women continue to have power over men because men get programmed by these kinds of shows. They get programmed by these kinds of shows. To continue to provide resources to a woman. Thank you, Kevin. In order to provide resources to women, it's the welfare state of women, right?
[13:43] So, how do you know if you're still in the friend zone or not? So, the general way that this works, and I'm not talking obviously about all women, and I'm not even talking about a lot of women, but certainly some women, what they do is they say, if you really cared about me, you'd be very happy to just be my friend. Right? If you're here for something more, then you don't like me as much as a person. A real friend would be happy and just accept me for who I am and care and treasure about me for who I am and not be here for something else. And we can't be friends? I thought you were my friend. Oh, you're here for something else? I thought you were just here because you like, you know, this kind of stuff. It's very manipulative and all of that, right? And in general, it is, and again, I'm just not blaming women. Women in general get way too much power when they're young, right? And the reason they have so much power is that the consequences of childbirth are so huge that they need to be able to choose just the right guy. So guys need to be more thirsty and women, right? Men propose, women dispose, right? Men ask, women say yes or no.
[14:57] So I remember and I've mentioned this before on the show and I'm going to get the quote right, right it took me a gay man it took a gay man.
[15:20] To teach me something about, something about female nature.
[15:35] So, he basically says, the woman, Blanche Dubois says, do you think it's ever possible that I could have been considered attractive? And he's like, no, no, I don't do that. I don't go in for that stuff. She's like, whatever do you mean? I don't go in for this. I don't compliment women about their looks. I never met a woman yet who didn't know exactly how attractive she already was.
[16:00] And some women give themselves credit for way more than they've actually got. Right? I never met a woman who didn't know exactly how attractive she already was. So this is a female nature. It is female nature to know when a man is attracted. And the Hiram is the man who will do stuff for free for the woman, feed her ego, do her chores, help her out, keep her safe, walk her home, come over when she's lonely, watch TV, right? And she treats him as a brother while exploiting him as a lover.
[16:44] There's an old line from WKRP in Cincinnati where one of the guys is looking to stay with another guy, and the other guy says, well, I already have a roommate. I already have someone living with me. And it's the player, right? And the guy says, who? And he's like, well, you know, elderly Asian gentleman, right? Which, of course, it wasn't an elderly Asian gentleman. It was some hot girl or hot woman.
[17:10] And if the person was... an elderly Asian gentleman, would you be going over to help them move? In other words, if it was not someone who was sexually attractive to you, would you be doing it? Let's say that the woman was, let's say, a lesbian and therefore not attracted to you as a man. Let's say that she was already married. Let's say she already had a long-term boyfriend. Let's say that for whatever a reason. You just, you absolutely knew for sure that she wasn't going to ever date you or sleep with you. Would you still be going over to do all of this stuff? Right? So the friend zone for women, again, not all women, just some, is where a man is treated like a brother, but exploited like a lover. She asked for more than she would get from just a friend. And there's usually not a lot of reciprocation, because the reciprocation that she provides him, frankly, is masturbatory fantasies, right? That's the phantom lover stuff, right?
[18:19] You understand that friendzoning is the original OnlyFans. It's the OnlyFans beta, non-tech version. Friendzoning is the OnlyFans 1.0. Because OnlyFans is when you're not going to get sexual access, but the woman expects resources. Or gets resources, and so is friendzoning. This is the reason why some women slide so easily into this corrupt world, is because they have a lot of experience in that, right?
[18:52] So, somebody says that story is making me feel sick. Yeah, the friend zone. Oh, everything I ever wanted, it turns out. Thank you, Lloyd. Is right. Everything is right here in front. It's been here the whole time. Yeah, this gives the friend zone guy hope, right? Hope. All right. Somebody says. Good evening, Stef. this is over on Rumble. I followed your advice about weed and just generally being lazy slash unproductive and it's really helped. Got three covers done while also working on an EP of original songs. Thank you. Fantastic. Well done. Haven't been able to tune in for a while. Says someone, is the science fiction book done? Yes, it is. The science fiction book is done, as is the prequel. The science fiction book is called The Future. The prequel is called The Present. And you can get them at freedomain.com slash books. And you absolutely should. They're free, and they're great.
[19:54] This is the first time I have tuned into this channel, and so far I'm a little wary that there is a somewhat one-sided view, but let's see. I like being scanned. You can TSA me. I'm just going to ask that you buy me a rose first.
[20:12] Boom, boom, boom. Oh, listen, I mean, men men exploit women too like obviously i'm not talking about nothing i say here is men good women bad right it's just that you know we need to balance the view a little bit because ever since i was knee high to a grasshopper it's been women perfect men bad right uh so yeah men men exploit women by a dangling over commitment and status and women exploit men in some ways uh but in particular, the friend zone thing is rough. So the way that you know if you're in the friend zone, right? The way that you know you're in the friend zone is this. If she says she met a great guy, are you happy for her? Right? That's how you know if you're in the friend zone, right? If she says, oh my God, I just met the coolest guy, 6'4", finance, right? He just met this great guy and I'm really excited. I really feel this has potential. He's very cool. He's smart. He's funny. And, and are you, cause you know, if, if, you know, you love your sister and your sister marries, meet some great guy who could be just right for her, you're thrilled and happy, right? You're, you're, you're gay, right? So you're in the friend zone and want more. If you're not happy, if she tells you, oh, great. If she tells you about some great guy she met, if you're not happy about it, if you're upset about it, then you're in the friend zone.
[21:37] The friend zone is the dead zone, right? We know all of that, right? The friend zone is the dead zone. Because when you're in the friend zone, you're not looking for something else. If he met you at the cowboy bar, he doesn't work in finance. Oh, come on, maybe he's bucking the trend. Bucking the trend. so.
[22:06] Thanks Stef on point again only did that guy just wake up from COVID yeah maybe that's probably alright to have a girl quote friend if you have another girl as a girlfriend but if she finds out you have a girlfriend the friend will become attracted to you, well, men and women can be friends but there has to be zero sexual intent, right? I mean, come on, man. Males are, in general, vagina-seeking missiles. It's just how we're built. We're just constantly evaluating with vagina-seeking missiles and all's fair in love and war and reproduction. Like, ladies, for you, it's been a bit of courtship. I mean, unless the tribe, some foreign tribe comes and invades, in which case they take all the women as hostages and kill all of the men, which is, I guess, more of a blood sport for the men. But ladies, you need to understand this from the male perspective. And you guys correct me if I'm wrong. If I'm going astray here based upon your experience, let me know. And I will obviously take your thoughts and feelings into account.
[23:12] But reproduction for men has been a take-no-prisoners-blood sport throughout most of human history. And I'm not talking about violence or anything like that. But it has been, you know, by hook or by crook. Because there have been times in history where many more females reproduce than males, like in terms of the ratio, three to one, four to one, I've even heard higher, 14 to one in places, right? So for males to gain access to not just the reproductive capacities of a woman, but having her actually raise his children, which is, you know, the trick, right? I mean, the trick is not to get a woman pregnant. I mean, obviously violence could have achieved that throughout most of human history, but you have to actually get her to want to raise your kids, right? It is an absolute blood sport for men throughout almost all of human history. So we don't screw around when it comes to screwing around. All's fair in love and war comes from a male perspective.
[24:13] So, and one of the ways in which a female signals her attractiveness is to have the beta orbiters, is to have the guys on deck, to have the friend zone guys around. And of course, all of the men, I mean, hit me with a Y. Have you ever had this where you start dating a woman and you realize that she's got a bunch of guys around who want to sleep with her? Of course she does, right? If she's attractive, right? There's going to be a bunch of guys around who want to sleep with her. And you kind of have to clean house a little bit, right? Because you know, right? And like, you know, you get that, hey, man, it could be time to move on. Might be time to move on, right? Might be time to move on. Could be time for you to move on, right? Because, it's table scraps, right? The beta orbiters are like.
[25:16] Table scraps. I hope someone drops something so that I can pick it up, right? I hope that you know, it's the old thing she's crying on your shoulder about or she's crying on some guy's shoulder about her mean boyfriend and he's got a boner. It's like it's sad but true it's sad but true how long do i have to let her cry before i make a move i would never do that to you honey i wouldn't i can't believe he did that that's so terrible i would never like you know i mean not that i've ever done something quite so underhanded.
[25:50] But i've heard tell i've heard tell of these of these things so yeah it's a blood sport and, And, you know, the expectation of getting out of the friend zone keeps many a man circling the drain, right? The expectation of getting out of the friend zone keeps many a man circling the drain. Because the friend zone is a serf slash slave mentality. You're allowing yourself to be exploited by the woman, which means that she's not going to be attracted to you if she's, you know, most females, right? Because if you're going to be exploited by her, then you're also going to be exploited by other men and other women, and therefore you won't have enough resources to apply to the challenging task of raising children, right? So if you allow yourself to be exploited as a man, then you are just not going to be attractive to the woman. I mean, unless there's something really wrong with her, in which case you really don't want to, uh, you really don't want to, uh, get, get involved in all of that kind of stuff.
[26:56] All right, so somebody says, I have the biggest crush on this girl at my work. I introduced myself to her formally, two days ago, formally, after having a few off-the-wall convos. I still didn't ask her out, though. All I can say is, as much as I'm fond of her, I'd never even consider settling for just friendship with her. Hmm. So, if you've had a few off-the-wall convos, then if she hasn't mentioned a boyfriend, then she's either available or manipulative. Now, listen, I just want to be all kinds of humble about this because I have never been one of nature's natural aristocrats, young, attractive females. I've just never, I mean, I was a fairly good looking guy as a teenager and all of that. and you could say I pull my weight above average even now, but I've never been in that position of.
[27:57] Prized female, prized young, attractive female. I honestly, I can't conceive of it. I can't conceive of it. I mean, you could say that men who are successful and attractive and single without children in their late 30s have some of that, but the problem is you've grown into that for the most part, right? Now, I'm sure that there are some uber stud muffin guys who have that, but that was never, that was never me. I mean, I was scouted for modeling once or twice, but it was never that guy, right? That uber Chad guy. And so...
[28:36] It's really, really hard to imagine what that kind of power is, and it's really hard to imagine that people don't inevitably get corrupted by that power, right?
[28:43] That intense power of youthful female sexuality is only supposed to last, as I said before, maybe six months, maybe 12 months, maximum 18 months, and then you're supposed to be big with child and be off the market, right? And also, you're supposed to be limited to your local tribe, right? And also there is a real challenge as well which is that a very attractive woman can tend to destabilize, society so let's say that you're known for having very attractive women then the tribe with the troll females the bearded dwarven short females will come and take your women there will be a war over that there was a whole war fought over Helen of Troy the face that launched a thousand ships.
[29:31] Because when a very attractive woman comes in to the environment, the men, the single men in particular, maybe even some of the men who are paired up, they become quite competitive and aggressive, right? There's a destabilizing element, which is why women are supposed to get pair-bonded, paired up, and start having kids, to take the dimmer down from that supernova of power and attractiveness that coalesces around. Young women now, of course, I mean, what do young women have they've got? Now, filters. Filters are insane. I mean, the filters are absolutely completely and totally mental. They have the filters, they have massive amounts of makeup, they have corsets, they have Spanx body shapers, they have post-production, and so on, and they have an audience of hundreds of millions of single men.
[30:23] Right? Hundreds of millions. And they think that that is not the equivalent of pornography. Like male attention for women is the equivalent of pornography of a man. And of course, women also have the bodice rippers, the romances, right? The Harlequin novels, the romances and so on, which is very, very, it's desperately bad for women, right? Desperately bad for women, because it absolutely raises the standards of male attractiveness and success to the point where a woman simply can't be happy with an average guy, right? It's a bell curve, right? Most people are in the middle, right? Most people are in the middle, and they need to, uh, this is, you know, the work of the great, late great Kevin Samuels, right? So most men and women are in the middle, right? They cluster around between four and six and a half, maybe, right? In general, right? That's the bulk of the population. And so they need to, they need to get a man like themselves in the middle, right? Not some guy who makes half a million dollars a year and is 35 and like these people largely don't exist.
[31:33] And so all of this, this goes all the way back to Jane Austen, right, with Darcy, who is ruggedly good looking and has massive amounts of land, huge tracts of land, and is super intelligent and also has a great conscience and so on, right? So this is just the perfect guy, right? Right he he knows exactly how to dress he's got a tousled head of full hair he uh is muscular he rides horses beautifully with his shirt billowing out and you know he's he's got a thousand acres and like all of this nonsense right it's all it's all just completely nonsense since and this super stimuli for women it's kind of like i still remember it was not a great movie, but the movie fisher king right has in it a woman who is a secretary who's beautiful and reading nietzsche right or for men it's like the librarian who doesn't even know how beautiful she is, and so on, right? And, yeah.
[32:53] Or what's the, there's a trend on TikTok, it's like, show me your baggy outfit, then reveal what's underneath, and the women bounce, and you can just see a flash of them in their bikini, and so on, right? Yeah, male thirst is the equivalent of pornography for women, and of course, everybody talks about male pornography addictions, which is certainly a valid topic and all of that, but the female addiction to attention and also to these Harlequin romances. I actually applied for a job there when I was in my teens. They did not take me on. I wasn't applying for a job as a cover guy, but I did apply for a job there. And, you know, the bodice rippers and the, you know, the Fabio stuff and the guy who's like smoldering eyes and he's brooding, but incredibly sexy, and she has much control over him for no particular reason. He just fixates upon her, and he broods, he hates his attraction, but he's drawn to her like a magnet, and she has so much control over him, and she gets access to all of his resources. And oh yeah, it's just, it's crippling, absolutely crippling. It's like going from the three tenors to karaoke, going from that crap to like normal people.
[34:11] So, you have to look at the, what's they call the female delusion calculator, you have to look at a woman's assessment of what she's worth, right? This is another, this is part of my apology to her for last show, or for show on Wednesday, is what does the woman think she's worth? What does the woman think she's worth? Now, if she thinks she's, you know, I'm a 10 and I'm worth everything and I'm going to hold out for just exactly the right guy, I need the perfect guy, you've got the list of everything that he's supposed to bring to the table and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
[34:54] And you can't compete with fantasy, right? You can't compete with the unreal. Like this woman i dated um many many years ago obviously long before i was married so i wanted who was like really she thought that she was really really into david beckham you know david beckham's a good-looking guy and he's obviously very wealthy and very skilled and he's you know obviously a very skilled soccer player and so on right and i'm like okay okay um i used to like Sandra Bullock back in the day. I thought she was very pretty. And of course, a woman with a good sense of humor is catnip to me. But it's odd. Isn't that odd? Isn't that odd? That a woman would say that.
[35:48] So, Stef, have you heard of the YouTube channel Homath? I find him to be brilliant and think a chat between the two of you would be of similar caliber to the Keith Knight interviews. Well, thank you. I've watched a couple of his videos. I haven't watched them on YouTube, but I've seen a couple of his snippets on, x and the man clearly is a inveterate doodler and he is unpacking things but to me it's too general and it's too cynical and that's just me it is no criticism on the guy and just my particular taste is that he is uh he is too uh cynical and he generalizes too much right i mean is he spending much time around say christian women right although the christian women are also looking for the perfect guy in many ways as well. I've heard this, that, you know, the Christian women won't choose any guy from the actual congregation. It's always going to be a convert in from outside.
[36:46] What's that statement that said, women feel oppressed because they only compare themselves to the top 1% of men, right, in terms of male power, male wealth, and so on. So women feel oppressed because they only ever compare themselves to the top 1% of men, and the bottom 50% of men don't even exist to them like they're just they're just pixels walking past like blocked out pixels like Minecraft, so yeah if you're talking to a woman and you know she has a list of everything she's looking for and she doesn't match that list or she has if she has a list of demands and not what she has to offer like this is what the man has to bring to the table but I am the table like that's just narcissism and that's that's something to absolutely stay clear on she will break your heart, Because by the time, like, everybody gets sorted over time. Everybody gets sorted over time. Everybody gets. So you end up either alone or with a person of equivalence over time, right? It generally works out that way. Because if it's too high status, too low status, it generally tends not to last, right?
[38:01] So um robert f kennedy jr was at some trump roast and his wife was like stroking his cheek and she looks like a half duck-lipped plastic-headed stepford wife and you know she seems nice and all of that but she looks exactly like you would expect the wife of a kennedy to look it just tends to work out if you want to know how attractive you are look at the woman who'll stay with you right that's usually kind of how attractive you are so if the woman has a list of, demands, but not what she offers, you are in for a world of hurt. You're absolutely in for a world of hurt. So, I would generally recommend not getting involved with someone like that.
[38:47] I deserve the best. All right. I deserve the best. And the question is, so why?
[38:53] Why do you deserve the best? Are you the best? Right? I mean, Jim Carrey was like, the first actor to make $20 million a movie, and yeah, he can, because the guy can make $200 million off a movie, right? Or, I think, $300 million for some. The most profitable actor, at least some years ago, was Matt Damon, in terms of, like, his price versus the revenue he did. Because the man is willing to go from, hey, look at me, I'm a pear, to, you know, jacked Jason Bourne, you know, and it's hard. It's hard work to do in your 40s, for sure. So, So...
[39:32] Every extra wants to be paid $20 million. I deserve $20 million. Like, that's deranged, right? If a man were to say, I don't know, what is the top 1% of earnings in America? 1% earnings USA. All right, what is the top 1%? Top, what is the top 1%? Household income in the U.S. Is a little, in 2023, for households, it's $591,000 and change. For a single earner, the cutoff is $407,000, so $400,000, right? The top 10% for individuals is $132,000, top 1% is $400,000 and $7,000, so one guy out of... A hundred makes $407,000. But, of course, the problem is that the $407,000 is usually happening when the man is 45 to 55. Right? Because 45 to 55 is when a man's income generally kicks in. Right?
[40:55] So if a woman I'll get you a question it's a great question I'm taking all questions oh my apology to it continues but, If you want the top 1%, then you better be the top 1%, right? It does the woman have a wish list. And a wish list is a promise to be dissatisfied, right? A wish list is a promise to be dissatisfied.
[41:30] Because you just won't measure up. you just like if the man thinks that like he's not a top-tier guy he's not a high-value man right whether you can say that's money or looks or whatever he's not right does he want or does he genuinely believe he deserves a woman with the figure of victorious secret right those women really don't keep anything secret do they my secret is i'm a slut but when he wants a victorious secret model and he believes that that's what he deserves and that's anything less than that is an insult to his potential than when he meets a woman with a normal figure or even an above average figure like those victoria secrets models are like one in a hundred thousand women plus you know they do the work and all of that but they have that fortuitous fat distribution and all of that and again they do the work but one of the reasons they do the work is they already look that good right Right. So he's then going to be dissatisfied with a normal looking woman because he's got this template of perfection, right? This platonic ideal. So, uh, Pruiss on Rumble says, what about chemistry as opposed to preconceived lists of what the other person needs to live up to? But chemistry is just lust.
[42:48] So people used to call it lust. Now they call it chemistry because it doesn't sound as sinful, right? I mean, tell me if I'm wrong, right? Actually, don't mind this. Not lit up background seems all right. I like having a blank background because it's more of a challenge to keep your attention, which I embrace. So chemistry used to just be called lust.
[43:10] But lust is a sin, and we still have the faint echoes of that, right? And so chemistry is lust. So chemistry is biochemical, and it is a... Feral gnome? I got this wrong. Feral gnomes. It is a scent-based attraction, and, you know, if you have a particular fetish, like you're a leg man and she's got a great pair of getaway sticks or something like that, then she's tickling your lust and it's just flesh, right? It's not sustainable. It's just fairly low rent, our selected mating strategies. I don't agree with your definition of chemistry. Okay? Well, let me ask you this. If it's not lust, if it's not about sexuality, than, have you ever met a man who says, I met this great guy, and he's a straight man, right? And he says, yeah, I met this great guy at the bar. We just fell into talking. There was so much chemistry.
[44:22] No man would ever say, we have so much chemistry. Chemistry means lust. That's all it means? Because it's not applied to heterosexual same-sex relationships, right? When did chemistry enter the lexicon? Boomers? Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Right. Right. Chemistry entered the lexicon because we needed another word. It's women, right? Women don't want to say lust, so they say chemistry. And if you don't agree with my definition of chemistry, that's fine. But I think it's fairly clear that chemistry always means sexual attraction. Blind is on to everything but the top 1%. Chemistry is lust. Set up for disappointment. These reframes are the best as always, Stef. Well, thank you, and I appreciate your tip. I appreciate that. Muchly gratefully and deeply appreciate it.
[45:16] Yeah, chemistry is a physical response to a sexual stimuli. That's what chemistry is. It's lust. And look, I have no issue with lust. Lust is great. I'm with Iggy Pop, Lust for Life, right? So I have no problem with lust. It's just, let's call it for what it is. Now, hopefully we want to temper lust and have our lust be attracted to a woman of virtue and quality and integrity and honesty and all that kind of good stuff. So I have no problem with lust. Lust is great. But if it's just chemistry, yeah, it's lust.
[45:46] It's lust but women don't want to say lust so they want to say chemistry like it's some mysterious force pushing them together that they don't have to take ownership of right, for a lot of women sexuality is something they portray as something that happens to them you know I just don't feel it I just don't feel the chemistry you know I ended up getting pregnant like sexuality is something that happens to them, and it is a form of naivete and innocence right so for a lot of women to signal to men that they're younger than they are you know like the baby girl voice the little girl voice which i'm not going to imitate because it will haunt your freaking dreams so for a lot of women to portray themselves as younger than they are is attractive to men because youth fertility naivete and so on is quite attractive to a lot of men, so.
[46:42] What about pheromones? Pheronomes? Oh god, now I, you know what, I got it wrong once, now apparently I will never get it right. Pheromones. Pheromones! Yeah, pheronomes. Yes, I said pheronomes, then it was pheronomes, yes. Pheromones, yep, chemistry is attraction-based, Sorry, it is pheromones. Absolutely. It's still chemistry. Lust. Yes. So pheromones is generally when there's a genetic compatibility and a visual signal for having children. But it's not about the quality of the woman who's going to raise your children. It's to some degree about the health of the children you're going to have, right? So if you have an R-selected society, which is more like rabbits, where you just have a bunch of kids and you don't really put much effort into raising them, then you're going to have more of a physical-based attraction, right? Which is, you know, where you have women showing all their skin and shaking their butts and all that kind of stuff. When you have a need to transmit a lot of virtues and values to your children, then you have that kind of Victorian society where you look more for qualities of character because the women are kind of all covered up and you can't even see an ankle, right?
[47:58] So, and again, nothing wrong with the pheromones, nothing wrong with the lust. That's all great, but it is a sin if that's all there is, right? Somebody says, in my humble opinion, for men, chemistry is attraction based on verbal connection, humor, and sexual attraction. For women, all emotion and sexual attraction. Well, again, we can run that through our test, right? So, for men, chemistry is attraction based on verbal connection, humor. Okay, so let's take out the sexual attraction. So I'm sure men, you know, hit me with a Y if you've ever met another guy and hit it off right away. Like you meet a guy, you have the same sense of humor, you have to make the same jokes, you have the same perspectives and outlooks on many things, and you just feel a connection, right?
[48:43] So for men, chemistry is attraction based on verbal connection, humor. Okay, this can be, right, this can be male to male, right? Assuming you're straight, this can be male to male. So would a man who finds a new friend based upon verbal connection and humor would say, he has so much chemistry with that man? No. Chemistry means sexual attraction because it doesn't apply in a same-sex environment that doesn't involve sexual attraction. You say, for women, it's all emotional and sexual attraction. Nope. It's not emotional. It's sexual attraction because women can be emotionally connected to another woman. They can have friendships. They can share thoughts and feelings and so on. But a woman who meets another woman who she becomes friends with, they might say there was an instant connection, but they wouldn't say there's chemistry. Chemistry means lust. It's like ambling about for 20 years saying, I want a Ferrari. Where's my Ferrari? Without ever giving thought as to how to pay for it, right?
[49:38] Thank you for reminding me of the question. For the foreseeable future, all questions will be answered without complaint. All right. Thank you for the reminder. I appreciate that.
[49:54] What do the private call-ins cost? Just email me, callin at freedomain.com, and we'll talk about it. I would call man-to-man connection rapport. Yeah, but you wouldn't say. In my experience, jokes and conversation tend to land and flow more freely when there is a hormonal chemistry, i.e. physical attraction. Sure, yeah, I mean, it's a lubricant, literally, it is a lubricant, I completely agree. You're so funny, I see chemistry not only as lust, but also mutual interest, senses of humor, etc., I appreciate your perspective though. Fantastic, okay, mutual interest, senses of humor. So, if you are a man, and you join a bird watching club, and there's a guy there who's funny, and you have a good conversation, would you say, I have so much chemistry with that guy? You wouldn't. You'd say, oh, we have a rapport, we get along, we have a connection, or I like him. But you wouldn't say chemistry, because chemistry is reserved for a sexual attraction. All right. Do you think it's possible to be attracted to and attract a quality woman while you have your abusive parents in your life? I think you can't, but I've heard others make the case you can. I know in your case, you'd separated from your parents before you met your wife.
[51:18] I don't mean to laugh because it's not funny, but what you need to think of, is the woman's perspective, right? A woman's perspective. If you're going to sell something, this something being you, if you're going to sell something, you need to think about it from the perspective of the buyer. And this is because a lot of us were employees, or still are, and so with employees, we think about pleasing our boss, not about pleasing the customer, but if you're an entrepreneur, you have to please the customer, right? So, that's why I'm talking to you and taking your questions three times a week, right? So, when you want to attract a quality woman, You have to think, what does that quality woman want? What does a quality woman want? What are her preferences? What does she need? What will make her happy? What would make her pair bond? What would make her drawn to you, right? Now, let's say you have abusive parents in your life. Let's say that they tear you down verbally or whatever it is, right?
[52:29] Well, and let's say you're 30, right? And your parents are 55 and they've got another 30 years to live, which on average they will, right? So does a quality woman, want to spend the next 30 years with abusive in-laws, watching them tear you down? The person, the man she claims to love, the man she does love, does she want to watch that happen? Does she want her children's grandparents to be unstable, abusive, demanding? And she knows, men, we look at cleavage, women look at timelines and bloodlines. Like, it's just the way that it is. And, you know, love men, love women, and Lord knows we need both, right? But men are visual creatures and women think in the long term, at least quality women do, right? So a quality woman doesn't just think about you in the here and now, which is why income is important, right? And future and ambition is important. Men, we don't really care what the woman does, as long as she's slender, friendly, and positive.
[53:40] All of which would be markers of intelligence, in particular these days, where women are trying to, They try to program an etch, the tattoo of resting bitch face on every woman to kill the birth rate, right? Got to get that sneer like the artificial musicians in that Robert Palmer addicted to love video.
[54:02] So a woman looks and says, okay, so he's got mean parents, they put him down, they tear him down, he's really tense and unstable, every time the phone rings, he jumps, thinking it's them, they're kind of mean to him, and I can't stand it, and I'm going to marry into this, they're going to be the grandparents to my kids, they're going to be constantly goosing my husband, which is going to have me lose my respect for him over time, and they're going to get old, they're gonna get old they're gonna get old, and as the parents get old who's gonna take care of the parents if it's a quality woman she wants to raise her kids she wants to raise her kids she's gonna be a homemaker she's gonna right, who is going to be largely responsible for making sure that your parents, get the care and time and attention they need in their 10 to 15 year fade out, because we live forever past ghoul stage these days, right? Who's going to make sure, especially when one of your parents dies, right? Who is going to make sure everyone's taken care of? It tends to fall upon the women.
[55:18] See, a man to some degree can keep the woman's in-laws a little bit at bay, but the woman, if she's a quality woman, is going to say, okay, so these difficult people are going to be in my life for the next 30 years, and 10 of those years, I'm going to be taking care of them to some degree or another. Now, again, you can move, but someone's going to have to take care of them, right? Someone's going to have to, and it's going to be difficult. It's going to be difficult. And she's got her own kids. She's got her own parents to take care of and so on, right? Plus, then she thinks if she's a quality woman, let's say she comes from a good family, right? So then what she's going to do is she's going to say, okay, so I'm bringing my parents to the table, and they're going to interact with your parents, but your parents are abusive. So I don't want to subject my parents to that. And of course, her parents are going to say, ooh, um, I don't think that's a good idea. I don't think it's a good idea. Right? They're not quality people, right?
[56:15] Also, since a large number of person, almost all personality structures are influenced by genetics to some degree or another, so she's going to say, ooh, okay, so they're mean, and he's susceptible to meanness, how much of that is kind of hardwired and it's going to transfer to my kids, right?
[56:51] So in my view it's almost obviously there's exceptions to just about every rule most people who play the lottery lose money but every now and then somebody wins a bazillion dollars, but in my experience and i you know i've seen a lot of this stuff now it doesn't mean i'm right right i'm just telling you i have a lot of experience you know i i you know the good thing about getting close to 60 is that, especially having done public conversations, thousands and thousands of conversations about people's innermost thoughts, lives, experiences, I have a view that is public that I really don't think has ever been achieved before in human history. I mean, there are like, I don't know, daytime shows where they go into people's past and history and so on, but not philosophically and not in this kind of way, not morally, right? So, I've never seen or heard of somebody with abusive parents in their life getting and keeping a quality woman. Again, maybe people can dig up an exception or two that I've forgotten about, but I've not seen it.
[58:04] Because a woman is going to recognize that you can't care for her more than you care for yourself. And if you care for yourself, why would you have people in your life who are abusive.
[58:26] All right. Somebody says, Huge misunderstanding last time. When I say the dating market is utterly broken, I mean the relationship itself should be the only concern not having a woman taking half your house because she spent two years with you. How does one navigate this? Expecting a different result doing the same thing is insane. Until laws change, why would I take this risk when all around me men have been ripped off?
[58:48] Right. Well, you find a woman of moral quality, with objective moral values, who's well-educated, whether she's educated formally or informally, like she just reads a lot and is very curious and thinks about things, who's intelligent, who's got good verbal skills and knows how to negotiate, and your chances of divorce are virtually zero. Let's look at it. Let's look it up. Biggest predictors of not getting divorced. This is not, um...
[59:34] This is all things that predict divorce, right? Researchers who've studied over 40,000 couples can predict divorce with 94% accuracy, largely based on this communication error. So, let's see what we got here. It may stand simple, but whether or not a couple turns toward one another can make a massive difference in the relationship's longevity. While turning toward can look like a small gesture of acknowledgement and care, it signals to your partner that they are being seen, heard, and appreciated.
[1:00:17] So, there are four negative communication styles heavily predict divorce. Criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling. Right, so criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling, all of these things can be absolutely evaluated in the dating phase.
[1:00:38] Right, all of these things. So to counter these predictive outcomes, practice articulating your needs, taking responsibility when needed, and remembering your fondness for one another. So how does divorce happen? Divorce doesn't happen, of course. It's like ill health. In general, it doesn't happen immediately, right? It's like going broke. It happens slowly, then all at once, right? So how does divorce happen? Divorce happens when everybody, the partners, they have a conflict, and rather than move towards each other and saying, I really want to figure out this conflict because I care about you and I want to make sure we stay connected, right? So, what happens is people have a conflict and they don't take responsibility. They blame the other person and they take a step away from each other, right? And then maybe they drift a little bit back, but never quite back as close, right? You've got to heal these wounds, right? They get a little closer. Sex or they have some fun time. They see a comedy. They're both laughing, right? And then they get, right? But then there's another conflict. So, a little further apart each time, a little further apart each time. And because each time they get further apart, it's not a crisis, right? Like each cigarette is not a crisis, but one cigarette will kill you.
[1:02:01] So you get a little further and then you get back together because you get sex or fun or somebody dies and you come together, right? And then there's another conflict. And what happens is you just slowly move apart, seesawing back and forth, right? You never get quite as close. You've always got a little further. You never get quite as close. You always get a little further. You never get quite as close. You always get a little further. So you can't resolve things. You can't resolve things because one or both of you won't admit fault, humble themselves, and move to fix things. So that's how divorce happens so there's tons of rehearsals for this this is what dating is for dating is to see, if there's a conflict which there will be dating is to see how is the conflict handled do people escalate do they storm out are they defensive do they never admit fault do they blame you for everything these things are all, very clear I mean I remember my big relationship in my 20s I saw all of the problems in the first two weeks. I saw all of the problems in the first two weeks.
[1:03:16] So, let's see here. Let's say biggest predictors of marital, let's say marital success. All right. Nine strong predictors of a successful relationship.
[1:03:36] Perceived partner commitment is the partner in for life. Appreciation. Do you feel appreciated by what your partner is doing? Sexual satisfaction, of course, is very important. Perceived partner satisfaction. If you've ever been in a relationship with a woman who's just not happy or a man who's just not happy. Oh, man, it's bad. You can't make it last. They're just unhappy and dissatisfied. Oh, my God. That's crazy, right? Ability to effectively manage conflict. Yeah, conflict is an opportunity for growth, right? I was snippy last call, and I apologized, and that's an opportunity for growth, right? The individual characteristics that best predicted a person's relationship satisfaction had to do with life satisfaction? Negative affect. I don't quite know what that means. Oh, if somebody has a negative affect, which means that they're kind of down and view things in a negative context, that's going to be bad. Depression, quality of relationship attachment, right? So, in a relationship, right? This is really, really important. In a relationship, and let's just talk about, oh, going to have to put a tip in a free domain. You keep delivering pure God. Thank you. I appreciate that.
[1:05:00] So, when you're in a relationship, does the person withdraw in the face of conflict and threaten the bond? Right? Does the person withdraw in the face of conflict and threaten the bond? Or do they say, we're going to work this out? There's actually a great scene in Friends where Chandler and Monica, if I remember the names correctly, he's like, well, we've had a fight. I guess we're broken up. And she's like, we're not broken up. What are you talking about? We're just having a conflict. We're in. We fix it. We work in it, right? Now, you shouldn't spend that. I mean, I'm sure everyone, and maybe you've had this too, everyone has those relationships, or you know someone who has those relationships. Everything is just always having to be fixed. I mean, that's no good. That's exhausting, right? If you're constantly at odds with each other and constantly having problems or issues, who's, you know, I mean, it's fine, you know, you got to repair the car from time to time, but the purpose of the car is not to have it in the shop all the time. And the purpose of relationship is not to need to be fixed all the time. Did you have any conflict with your wife when you were dating her? Ah, did we have any conflict? You'd have to ask her if women have a steel trap mind for these kinds of things. I don't remember any particular conflict with your wife when I was dating her. I remember feeling this, I remember we were hiking down in Don Mills, and Don Mills and Don Valley. And I was watching her climb the hill and I was just like, man, this is so easy and great.
[1:06:28] This is so easy and great. And honestly, I mean, 22 years, we've never had any significant conflict. I mean, we've had our disagreements from time to time. But generally, our disagreements are because there's some malign influence or some negative influence coming in from outside the marriage. With regards to the marriage, honestly, I absolutely adore that woman. She works very hard for her family. She is incredibly kind and generous. She's very honest. She's very direct. She knows how to negotiate. She knows when to stand and when to be humble. And we've, I mean, we really have not had, and we've gone through some trials, I'll tell you that, man, but we've never had any significant conflict in the relationship. And certainly nothing that has been generated from within. And, you know, sometimes there's stuff coming in from outside for whatever reason, right? But I don't remember having any particular conflict. And I just remember thinking, I could absolutely do a lifetime of this. Oh, my God. And it's been completely right.
[1:07:38] All right.
[1:07:42] So yeah when you have a conflict you end up closer somebody says sam says two bucks and 50 cents and says i want my wife wants me to believe that she talks to god and god talks to her i grew tired of her telling me this to the point of getting angry how can i understand her i'm sorry how does she know she's talking to god and not the devil, because the devil would imitate God and have your wife follow his, advice, right? So how does she know it's God? And if someone claims to talk to God, right, it's testable, right? If you have a direct pipeline to omniscience, right? If you have a direct pipeline to omniscience, I mean, you take something in your hand and you say, ask God what I'm holding, right oh look it's a lip balm right um ask god what i'm holding uh have god tell me and if it's not a show but it doesn't work that way it's like okay um ask god what the price of bitcoin is going to be tomorrow or ask god to tell tell you anything that we wouldn't already know right because how do you know that it's god and not your vanity or potential a fantasy or the devil or like, how do you know, right? How do you know? You have to put it to the test, right?
[1:09:08] Pair bonding has gone. Stef said, studies show most women are after the top 20%. I'm a seven, so, well, again, you can doom pill yourself all you want, but that's just the devil talking. That's just the people who want to wipe out your genes programming the population to fill you with despair. Pair bonding has gone. I know younger couples than myself, been married for a long time, very happy, lots of kids. Pair bonding is not gone. Boom. All right. Where did we lose our questions here? Tips, of course, absolutely welcome as a whole. All right.
[1:09:57] All right the outside influences and misguidance are the most annoying part of the game these days yeah well i mean basically to be committed to a relationship is to remove everybody who harms it, to be committed to a relationship is you have to exclude everyone who harms it, all right i wonder if there is a way to calculate the number of western women of childbearing years that don't have significant number of red flags, probably as rare as the 6, 4, 35-year-old guy making 200k. Well, what is it? Only 2% of the world's population are white women of childbearing age? But apparently we're very concerned with minorities. It's wild. It's wild. Like a billion? Oh, I asked a few weeks ago if you'd seen Ready Player One. I have not got around to watching it. I really have been quite busy, I'm afraid, over the last little while for a variety of reasons, and I have not. But thank you for the reminder. I will get to it. I will get to it. Thank you for the reminder. All right. Let's get to your other questions or comments.
[1:11:15] And the other thing, too, is that, see, there are people who are deluded, and we're all deluded to some degree, because we all have a lot of skewed, like human beings aren't exactly designed to get significant portions of reality from an electronic screen, often programmed by adversaries. But a lot of people who have delusions have a part of them that is begging to be liberated from falsehood. Right? There are a lot of people just dying to be liberated from falsehood. I mean, both my wife and I had beliefs that weren't true when we met each other, and we both helped each other escape from falsehood. So just because somebody has bad thoughts, bad ideas, bad perspectives, bad opinions, and so on. Don't assume that all who are deluded are in love with their delusions. Some have just never been exposed to the truth.
[1:12:30] Right? Some have just never been exposed to the truth. And the moment they are, they're very interested. Don't assume that because somebody believes something false, they're immediately someone you write off. All right. It's been busy lately, just hopping back in tonight. How is everything going with you and philosophy and the channel and everything? Things are well with me. Things are great with philosophy. I did a good article rebuttal today about in defense of spanking. I don't know I'm going to end up debating with Andrew Wilson or whatever, but I did a good article rebuttal for that as well. Is it an extreme move to move countries to find a partner? I'm looking for traditional values and don't see many women that have them. Find a way to have kids with someone who shares rational values. Find a way to have kids with someone who shares rational values. It's easy to recoil from the craziness of the world, right? It's easy to require from the craziness of the world to take your balls and go home it's very easy to do that.
[1:13:36] Yeah the video on spanking was intense yeah this is a different one this is an article review but it's easy to require from the craziness of the world but do you understand, he said annoyingly do you get or have you absorbed that the world is saner than it's ever been, The world is saner than it has ever, ever, ever been. Because of conversations just like this. What's happening, of course, is that the men and the women...
[1:14:19] Of the world, are splitting, right? Rather than everyone being kind of in the middle, the world is splitting between truth and delusion. Facts, falsehoods, accuracy, lies. Philosophy, propaganda. So, the world is splitting. Now, when the world is splitting into the sane and the crazy, the world gets a lot more unstable right the world seems like it if a family is crazy but nobody's bucking the trend then the family appears stable but when let's say a couple of kids adult kids decide to start talking about the issues and problems within the family then the family gets polarized. Sanity brings polarization. Because sanity, rationality, honesty, causes a blowback of aggression and escalation.
[1:15:36] The plantation seems stable as long as the slaves Revolt. When the slaves revolt, you say, oh my gosh, things have gone crazy. Crazy.
[1:15:57] Crazy. And the white-hot madness that gets exposed when people start producing and pushing the truth. And all eternal praise to Elon Musk for his focus on free speech about this. I mean, I did make the case and the truth about free speech is a great presentation you should get to at fdrpodcast.com. White males tend to be the most free speech absolutists and Elon Musk is very much along those lines and, you know, huge, huge kudos to him. He's bringing a lot of sanity and madness to the world because madness doesn't know that it's mad until it's confronted with sanity and then it escalates. The madness and sanity are enemies because sanity is productive and madness is exploitive. It's a Dracula Van Helsing situation, right? I played him in two plays, believe it or not, Van Helsing the Vampire Hunter.
[1:16:59] My mother was relatively stable until I began telling the truth. And then she got massively destabilized and things looked crazy. No, things were crazy. It was just covered up with conformity. So the lies of the world are being undone by the online spread of the truth. People like to think that they're right right i mean to take us a sort of obvious example to find people hoax of charlottesville back in the day right find people hoax people can watch the video right away so they like to think that they're right and moral and good you send them the video they realize they've been lied to that really destabilizes people that's the re right, So the world, to the untutored eye, and I'm not saying you guys are untutored, but in general, to the untutored eye, it looks like people are going crazy. Nope. It's just a reaction to the spread of sanity. It's just a reaction to the spread of sanity. It's like if you've got your leg trapped under a log.
[1:18:21] And it's kind of gone numb, and then you're like, people lift it, or you move it, it hurts like hell. But that's because you're not dying.
[1:18:35] People who are immature, people who are greedy, people who are corrupt, people who are evil, view the truth as a predator. So, if you think about the truths that are cascading through society right now, I mean, how many times in war have you had direct exposure to the experience of the other side throughout human history? Well, almost never. So the world is convulsing towards sanity which is why i keep doing what i'm doing the world is convulsing towards sanity but it is, it looks crazy it looks crazier but that's because the conformity has been broken.
[1:19:35] So this is why it's really really important to not, lose heart, the crazy people will say you're making me crazy those kids are driving me crazy it's like no the kids have sane healthy normal questions right like my daughter gave me a great piece of wisdom on wednesday night which is why i started off the show with an apology she was absolutely right, out of the mouth of babes comes wisdom, right? So.
[1:20:15] Yeah, I mean, look at all the stuff that's coming out about COVID. They wanted to hold this off for 75 years or more. Look at all the stuff that's coming out about COVID. And the reason you know that truths have come out about COVID is COVID is no longer spoken of by the normies, right?
[1:20:32] As they say, science progresses one funeral at a time, right? And that's scientists who are supposed to be dedicated to truth, although they're mostly just captured for grants these days.
[1:20:45] So, when people have built their entire personality and sense of virtue and goodness and all of their relationships and their career and their income on falsehoods, then they react to the truth like a half-starved farmer reacts to you burning down his crops. Please understand. When people have built their lives on lies, they react to the truth like a half-starved farmer reacts to you trying to burn down his crops.
[1:21:21] And there's a genetic component as well because a lot of genes reproduce through mutually agreed upon falsehoods. A lot of genes reproduce based on mutually agreed upon falsehoods. If those falsehoods are revealed as false then it disrupts the gene transmission and therefore the truth is an enemy to the genetics that transmit themselves through falsehood, right? I mean, you can think of some, I mean, to take an obvious and extreme example, if you think of some extreme cult, then the falsehoods, to reproduce with people in that extreme cult, you have to accept the falsehoods of the extreme cult.
[1:22:00] And if you don't, then that is a genetic dead end, right? So the genes will fight against the truth because they reproduce through the lubricant of lies.
[1:22:18] So don't lose hope this destabilization is really really important, it's sort of like the welfare state or the transfer of resources from the more successful to the less successful the welfare state is fundamentally about genetic transmission, because poor people generally can't have many kids if they're really poor, right? Whereas if they take money from wealthy people then they can have more kids, right?
[1:23:12] You know, no matter what you think of various wars around the world, when you see, you know, screaming, crying men being pulled out of grocery stores to be thrown onto the front lines, wherever it is happening around the world, I mean, come on, that's a bit of a twinge, isn't it? You never saw that before.
[1:23:43] Now, I could be wrong about this, of course, right? Somebody wrote, there are many women looking for a suitable partner to start a family with, but men often have standards that are too high. That has not been my experience and not what I've talked about. Sorry, not what I've heard of or what I've talked about with people. And men certainly have their faults, for sure. But i do think that women's standards have been programmed to be too high because women have the standard of excess but men mostly have a standard of deficiency so women want you know six foot two abs right and and money and like this is all an excess right whereas men have standards of deficiency, don't be fat. That's a deficiency, right? Be less, right? Don't be fat. Don't be mean. Don't be naggy. Don't be bitchy. Whatever, right? It's usually to do with a deficiency. Now, if you have a standard of deficiency, it's a wider net than if you have a standard of high excellence.
[1:24:58] Right. There's a meme. And of course, memes are not proof. Right. But it's a fairly popular meme. And I can't remember exactly how it goes, but it's like the ideal woman, you know, she's six. She knows how to cook. She's not a witch or whatever it is. Right. Like a capital B. Right. I mean, for men, we're just, you know, for most men, we're just looking for some peace at home, some peace and some happiness and some positivity, some enthusiasm, some encouragement and someone to take care of and raise our kids. And, you know, again, you know, quality of conversation is very important to me and intelligence is very important to me, of course. Right. But I think men will accept a woman. There's another meme that I just saw on X where men are swimming over some woman because she's just smiling and being pleasant and greeting people at the door. Right.
[1:25:55] She's just smiling and pleasant and greeting people at the door. That's hard to picture for women as a whole. Right? So men, we will generally be interested in a woman, as I said before, last Friday, if she's slender, friendly, and positive. Right? an absence of overeating, an absence of hostility, an absence of negativity.
[1:26:40] Well, yeah have you seen the meme saying all women have to do is to attract a man to wear a sundress and tell them they don't trust the government yeah i mean honestly just don't overeat be friendly and positive and most men will give you a shot, because most people are pretty attractive if they're, a relatively healthy weight i can only think of honestly over the course of my entire life, I can only think of maybe three or four women of a healthy weight who were facially unattractive. I mean, you have to get some truly demonic levels of Habsburg inbreeding to be both slender and really homely, right? And it's true for men and women. So most women who take reasonably good care of themselves, exercise, have a reasonable figure, and some decent levels of grooming, pretty attractive. Pretty attractive. Pretty attractive. And this was a Seinfeld thing, wasn't there? Like a woman, he thought she was very attractive, then she shows up, and she's got no makeup on, he's like, oh, right?
[1:28:04] Obesity in the USA right now is pretty high. Women seem affected more than men. That is true. That is true. And that is helpful. See, y'all are looking at this stuff like it's a negative, right? But obesity is often a sign of, well, we've talked about it, a wild set of dysfunctions, right? Now, rather than having to spend a hundred bucks taking a woman out for dinner, you can just look at her silhouette. Okay.
[1:28:35] I don't understand why this is a bad thing. It's not hidden. It wasn't like all of the slender women in the 60s were sane. So it's not, it's very obvious now. So I don't, maybe I'm missing something, but I don't know how obvious dysfunction is a negative because it saves you a lot of time, effort, and energy. So you're saying there's fewer women to choose from, but it's way more efficient to choose them, right?
[1:29:08] Right, I mean, if a whole bunch of flights get canceled, you can say, oh my gosh, right, and they're canceled because there's a huge mechanical failure, right? Half the flights are canceled because they've got huge mechanical failures. Well, don't you want to find that out at the airport rather than going into the size of the Andes Mountain and getting out some ketchup and plastic forks to eat your fellow passengers with? Chilean soccer team style? Boy, there's a live reference you may or may not get. But if the plane's going to crash, you want it canceled, right? You want to know that, right? Oh, no, can't fly there. Oh, man, there's only half the flights available, yes, but you don't have to get on them and crash. So isn't that good? It's all in how you frame things, right? Oh, there's so few women to date. It's like, well, yes, but let's say that half the women knock themselves out because they're significantly overweight, or a third of women, or whatever, right? Okay, that's good. That's good. That's good.
[1:30:14] Maybe she's great and you can motivate her. I don't know.
[1:30:24] Curious, your thoughts on the morality and practicality of Islamic marriage rules. I'm a big one for philosophical morals. I don't particularly go for either statist or, you know, moral rules that are enforced through physical aggression. So it's not really part of my wheelhouse or something that I would work with. Oh no, all the crazy ones have shaved their heads and jammed a pitchfork through their nose. Yeah. Fairly, fairly easy to solve, right? All right, let's see what we've got here. A couple of minutes on. Oh, my gosh. Oh, well, that's not good. All right, hang on a second here. Bomb!
[1:31:19] I never see we're updating our terms with pleasure. Never all right let's do a couple mows on bitcoin, so as you've probably seen it's uh bumped up uh quite a bit as of early september it was 73 now 73.5 now it's 94.4 so that's like 25 almost 20-25 percent increase so that's not bad.
[1:31:56] That's not bad. So, ETFs are at an all-time high. Crypto goes mainstream. BlackRock boosts North America's $1.3 trillion worth of inflows. Blockchain analytics firm Chainalysis revealed on Thursday that North America continues to lead in cryptocurrency market share, driven by institutional momentum and Bitcoin exchange traded products, ETPs, in the US. The region received 1.3 trillion in on-chain value between July 2023 and June 2024, representing 22.5% of global crypto activity maybe you know what this is quite long maybe I'll do this in the morning yeah maybe I'll do this in the morning and have a more dedicated show, for that all right any other last tips questions issues it's like when your gold prospecting is a huge advantage if you can know where the gold is not available yeah for sure for sure you know the sane woman is dying to meet you. Just dying to meet you. A woman being confident with her femininity, including being affectionate, is powerful and super attractive. And listen, guys, rather than.
[1:33:11] Oh, how nice am I going to be? Because listen, I whine, I complain, but rather than whining, about how few good women there are out there, how about you try and look at it from a woman's standpoint, right? Could you not have even the slightest bit of sympathy for how difficult it is for women to find a good man?
[1:33:37] Can you put yourself in a woman's shoes and try to understand how difficult it is for a woman to find a good man? Because there are good men here and good women here. There are good men and women out there as a whole, and they're looking for good people. And I want you to look around at the men as a whole in your environment. Just when you're walking around, try this. Try putting on a woman's shoes in your mind, right? So just try and walk it around with a woman's eye. It's really, really instructive. It's very helpful, very helpful, and very important, right? To start with the bitterness, right? It's bitterness, very unattractive, as we know, right? So I want you to think, tonight, tomorrow, you're walking around. Try to count how many attractive men there are around. Like imagine being a young, single, reasonably attractive woman. How many attractive men are there around? Just try looking at it through the eyes of a woman.
[1:34:55] Try, or imagine you're gay, whatever it is. Try to look and say, because look, as a man, we check out the competition. even if you're straight, you know what an attractive man looks like. So, try doing this exercise. Go walk through the mall, walk down the street, go bowling, go, look around and say, if I was a woman, how many of these men would I find attractive? So, have a little sympathy, because the men are all like, oh, and don't find that many attractive women. It's like, okay, I get that. But try looking at it from a woman's perspective. And, you know, ladies, you can tell me, what do you think? Are there lots of attractive women?
[1:35:46] Somebody says, Stef, your call with the Eastern European man last week helped me a lot in understanding how to go about fixing my marriage to my abusive wife. I donated for the first time and wanted to say thanks. You are welcome. You are welcome. The girls I know call it the man's session to find a man under 35 that is employed and motivated, etc. Yeah, and it's not a porn addict, a video game addict, a bad groomer, a flabby, neckbeard, resentful, or some hollow-eyed player who's negging you like you're some sort of idiot box that he wants to shake until you orgasm like how about or some guy who maybe is into i don't know andrew tate's a bit too much and is a little too punchy and bros before hoes and looking for his maserati and you know just like just a quality guy, a quality guy so instead of feeling hard done by because you can't find enough quality women how about you sympathize a little bit with the women who can't find quality men? Right?
[1:36:53] Because if you can't empathize with women as a whole, I got to tell you, I'm not sure you deserve a quality woman. Straight up. If you can't empathize with women as a whole, and remember, as men, it's less so now, but it's certainly in the past, as men, you are not nearly as much targeted for propaganda. The propagandists step over you and aim their lasers and daggers at the hearts, minds, and ovaries of women. Because if you want to reduce the population, it's a lot easier to convince women to not have kids than men. So you teach women to be shallow, you teach them to enjoy dating, you teach them there's lots of options, you fill their heads full of the perfect man propaganda, you publish a whole bunch of, bodice rippers and smut novels that women can fantasize about and so on.
[1:38:06] So women are targeted a lot more with propaganda because women are the choke point for reproduction. So you say well women seem to be more propagandized than men it's like yes that's true that is true but not because, there's anything wrong with women in any foundational way but just because that's the choke point for reproduction, so have some sympathy and be willing to have some leadership in the matter in my humble opinion in. All right. Bit of a low donation night, but that's all right. Maybe later, if you've got this and you're finding this valuable and helpful, freedomain.com slash donate to help out the show. I really, really would appreciate it. Lots of love from up here.
[1:38:59] I will talk to you soon. And remember, freedomain.com slash call, if you'd like a call-in show, I would be very happy to accommodate that, whether you want it paid or public is fine with me. All right. Lots of love, guys. I will talk to you on Sunday and have a great weekend. Bye.
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