0:06 - Welcome to Friday Night Live
15:26 - The Burden of Parental Neglect
25:08 - The Cycle of Neglect
31:22 - Communication Breakdown
37:33 - The Pain of Non-Connection
40:54 - The Intrusion of Neglect
45:06 - The Impact of Parental Indifference
51:06 - The Role of Anger in Relationships
58:02 - Understanding Sexlessness in Marriage
1:02:21 - The Legacy of Childhood Trauma
1:13:51 - Breaking Free from Childhood Patterns
1:16:23 - Overcoming a Bad Childhood
1:23:59 - The Call-In AI Preview
In this episode of Friday Night Live, I dive into the intricacies of parental neglect and its profound effects on childhood development and adult relationships. I begin by discussing a recent call that inspired this exploration, emphasizing the crucial idea that neglect can leave children feeling invisible and unworthy, shaping their self-perception in harmful ways. I share my conviction that to break free from the chains of neglect, it is essential to confront feelings of anger, which I argue are vital for healing.
We then delve deep into the metaphors of parental obligations, comparing them to a contractual relationship where parents owe their children love, care, and attention. I illustrate this concept with vivid scenarios involving wage discrepancies that evoke feelings of anger, forcing listeners to ponder their own childhood experiences of neglect. This discussion naturally leads to reflections on how the inability to express anger in a safe environment can perpetuate cycles of emotional suppression within families.
A significant portion of our chat is dedicated to the challenges that arise in teenage relationships, particularly the communication breakdowns resulting from neglect in earlier years. I argue that the absence of meaningful interactions can lead to teenagers feeling unworthy and disengaged from their parents, where conversations might feel like a chore rather than a connection. I draw upon personal anecdotes and hypothetical situations to highlight the importance of fostering genuine dialogues and showing curiosity about children's lives.
As the conversation continues, I tackle the ramifications of perceived parental apathy, noting that children often internalize their parents’ disengagement as validation of their perceived shortcomings. I emphasize that this toxic dynamic can make it exceedingly difficult for children to develop a healthy self-image, discussing how the absence of support and encouragement breeds feelings of worthlessness.
Moreover, I touch on the difficult topic of sexual intimacy within marriage, suggesting that sexlessness is often an outcome of unresolved anger and neglect in prior relationships. I offer insights into how partners can break the cycle of emotional distance by embracing open communication and emotional honesty, empowering both individuals to articulate their needs and desires.
Towards the end of the episode, I highlight the broader implications of these childhood experiences in adult relationships, punctuating my points with historical anecdotes and philosophical reflections. I wrap up the show with a brief discussion on the role of reason and madness in our lives, asserting that navigating between them is critical for personal liberation, particularly in contexts shaped by neglect and emotional evasion.
Join me as we navigate these complex themes together, aiming to foster a greater understanding of how past experiences shape our present realities, all while engaging in a conversation designed not just to entertain but to enlighten and provoke thought.
[0:00] Good evening. Good evening. Welcome to your Friday Night Live, 25th October 2024, 251024.
[0:07] And we are going to have some serious sandworm bring the spice show tonight. It's spice time tonight, my friends. Good evening. Good evening. Welcome. Welcome. Welcome. This show is going to change your life. I mean, they're all aiming to do that. But this one, okay, maybe it won't change your life quite as much as getting into Bitcoin 20 years ago, but, he said anachronistically, Joe says, Stef, thanks for releasing that entrepreneur episode early. It was a great episode. You are welcome, Joe. I aim to please. I aim to please. Somebody asked, can I do the truth about siblings? You'll need to give me more detail than that. All right. Hey, Stef, I would love if you can do a review on The Substance. It's a horror movie. Hit it on women growing old, losing their youth beauty in what you speak of, the desire for the unearned. Boy, have you ever, have you ever seen a movie called The Platform?
[1:15] Have you seen a movie called The Platform? Dear God, don't. Whatever you do, do not see the movie called The Platform. It is absolutely monstrous it is absolutely monstrous it is as close to hell as you're ever going to get do not have anything to do with that movie it is just, monstrous don't forget fdrurl.com slash tiktok join the tiktok channel I really would appreciate that it's nice to see thank you Anthony for the donation massively appreciated as always super kind super thoughtful, massively, and humbly appreciated. Remember, I did the free call-in with the guy who I was a bit rude to a week and a half ago, so that's good, and let's see here.
[2:13] All right, so you gather your questions, gather your questions, and hit me with a Y if you're ready. To change your life. You tell me if you're ready to change your life, I will change my glasses. There we go. Slightly less of a Bubbles, what is it, Bubba from the Trailer Park Boys?
[2:45] So, yeah, the spoilers. Not spoilers exactly, but the movie The Platform is a sadistic, horrendous, murderous, cannibalistic, violent, degrading, rapey, psychotic, communist vision from an Italian-Spanish director. And in it, people are in these prisons in layers, and food goes from the top to the bottom, and everyone just takes stuff. And then there's nothing left for the people of the bottom and they have to turn on each other it's really really subtle analogy because marxist socialists are animals which is a huge insult to animals of course but they're animals because animals really don't farm much i guess ants do a little bit right but for marxists there's just an incomprehensible amount of food some people get some, and other people just don't. You can't make your own food, you can't produce your own food, you're completely trapped. I mean, Marxism comes from the youngest siblings on highly abusive families, right? If you're the very youngest brother in a highly abusive family, you're going to be a Marxist.
[4:03] I know, I've never watched a trailer park, boys, but I did see them shill for the vaccine. So, didn't need to shill for the vaccine. All right, I got the question about sexlessness in a marriage, and I got a couple of other questions. Am I the same person? And I will get to those, but I'm going to give you all a life-changing speech. So, yeah, Don Quixote by Cervantes is sort of famous. It's called Tilting at Windmills. It's about a knight who's a fool who thinks he's fighting a dragon, but he's just running his lance at an old windmill. It means to be grandiose about the foes that you're fighting because you're daughtery and sentimental, and you're not actually fighting any particular foes at all of any substance or import. All right. And we'll go and check the comments over on Rumble as well, just so you know. Hello, Wilson. Freedomain.com slash donate to help out the show freedomain.com slash donate so this comes from a call today uh this comes from a call today that will never see the light of day, but it is a call from today.
[5:20] It's about the problem of parental neglect so what i'm saying here is foundationally relevant I mean it'll be taken out of context of course right but I mean I'm not gonna become paranoid because people are manipulative listeners but it is specific to people who have parental neglect, how much for you to be shirtless for this speech hey man throw throw throw something over and let's see how it goes.
[5:58] So, parental neglect. This call today, it's happened a bunch of times and we've talked about it. I won't talk about the call today, but we've had it a bunch of times where people are bullied as children and their parents don't seem to notice, things like that, right? So, this is around substantial parental neglect. The parents don't take joy in your existence. They don't seek out your company. They don't want to play with you. They don't help you understand how important you are to them. They don't evince or manifest any particular pair bonding. They just don't seem to connect with you at all. So I'm talking about significant parental neglect.
[6:42] What do you do about it? So the modern, and I dare say hyper-feminine way that people deal with childhood pain is to feel sad. So sad. Just tragic. All the things that I just didn't get that I needed and all of the problems and I just, I feel so hollow and I want to reach for my parents, but I just don't, you know, they just, I can't connect with them and there's this sorrow and this sadness. And listen, sorrow and sadness, no problem with it. we all have sorrow, we all feel sad from time to time. Into every life a little rain must fall.
[7:29] But dear God.
[7:35] Dear God, you cannot get to safety from neglect without anger. You cannot get to safety from neglect without anger. And how do you get to the anger? Well, go with me on a journey, a metaphorical journey. Now, if you weren't neglected, this will help you understand people who were neglected. And if you were neglected, this will help you understand yourself and free you from it, from the effects of neglect. This is what I mean when I say this is a life-changing speech. Once again, you're making a speech that is of direct relevance to my personal life. Thank you. I appreciate that. So, here's how to think of neglect. It's not even a suggestion. Here's how to think of neglect.
[8:41] So, let's say that you book a private call in with me, and you pay ahead of time, right? You book a private call in with me, freedomain.com slash call in, and you pay ahead of time, and then I just don't show up. And I ghost you. and I block you, and I ban you, right? I ghost you, I block you and I ban you. What would you feel? Tell me, what would you feel? You book a private call with me, pay ahead of time and I just don't show up. And then I block you and ghost you and you never get the call.
[9:30] How do you feel? What's your response? Are you sad? Are you, you feel that just a sense of loss and, you know, we just don't connect and, and I just wasn't given what I needed and I, I just, I'm sad and, and the sorrow and the, right? Well, you're angry, aren't you? Because I incurred a voluntary debt with you. You paid me for my time and I didn't show up. I don't explain. I ghost and I block. You'd be mad, right? Now, of course, yeah. I mean, I'm just giving you an example. It could be anyone, right? If it was anyone else, fury, Right, yes. It's a long con. It's a long con. I've been doing this almost 20 years just to rip you off the price of a private call, right? But you'd be mad, right? You'd be mad. Why? Because I didn't pay you what I owed you, which is my time for your payment. I didn't pay you what I owed you, so you'd be mad. Now, there'd be some sorrow, maybe there'd be some disappointment. Gee, I thought Stef would be slightly more honorable than that. I mean, and the reason this is sort of theoretical is that I don't charge people ahead of time. Anyway, you just pay when you're done.
[10:57] Depending on how long we go, how long you want to go, just pay when we're done. So you'd be mad, right? Okay. That's scenario number one. Scenario number two is you have, you're a parent, you have a beloved daughter. She's 14 years old and she gets a job as a dishwasher it's an ugly job and she's supposed to get paid every week.
[11:28] And she comes home, and she's really upset. You say, well, honey, what happened? I didn't get paid. He said, I didn't get paid. He wouldn't pay me. I said, but did you get fired? No. No, he wants me to come back. But he's not paying me. He's like, what do you mean he's not paying you? Why not? He doesn't say. I don't know why, I must be a terrible worker, I didn't drop any dishes, I tried to work as fast as I could, it's horrible there, it's a difficult job, but I tried to do a good job and he didn't seem to have any complaints, but he's just not paying me. He's supposed to pay me. I work Monday to Friday, he's supposed to pay me Friday night, that's what we talked about, you were there, that's what we talked about ahead of time, right, he's supposed to pay me Friday night, he didn't pay me. I don't think he's going to pay me. But he wants me to come back and he didn't have any complaints.
[12:38] Would you be mad? Sure. Right. You'd call up the guy and you'd say, Hey, um, bro, I'm sorry if you forgot, just to remind you, you owe my daughter the pay, right? She said she was working for this amount of hours. She worked this many hours and you owe her her pay.
[13:00] Right? Third scenario. Same daughter, a year or two later, she takes on a job, where she works very hard and she gets commission, but the commission is only paid after six months. She's selling encyclopedias. I don't know, that's back in the day. I had a girlfriend who did that once. And she's supposed to get paid after six months. She works her shoes to the bone. She wears out her shoes pounded the pavement doing the work, and then they're supposed to pay her like twenty thousand dollars after six months you've seen the numbers she's selling the encyclopedia she's doing the work she's making the sales and they just don't pay her would you be oh that's so sad oh you must be a terrible worker. Oh, they must be so disappointed in you. You'd be mad, right? Would you be sad? Yeah, I guess to some degree, to some small degree, but would you be mad? Well, yes. Of course. Of course you'd be mad.
[14:17] Because her employer hasn't paid her what he promised her, the conditions of her employment, and he's stealing from your little girl. Oof. He's stealing from your little girl. This asshole of an employer is stealing from your little girl. So that's what you do, right? You march right down to that office and you say, you guys cut a check for my daughter, you owe her 20 grand. And um if you don't um i'll take you to small claims court right i mean i actually had to do that once i put a deposit on an apartment and i said to the guy listen i gotta check with my girlfriend if she doesn't like it i need my money back and he's like no problem i checked with my girlfriend she didn't like it i went to get my money back he wouldn't give me my money back and i was like okay please give me my money back no deposit's non-refundable i said no no we we talked about this. We talked about this. You said I could get it back if my girlfriend didn't like it. Ah, you must have misunderstood. So I took him to court and I got my money back and he had to pay my legal fees.
[15:27] Don't have to have an argument. You just have to get things resolved.
[15:40] So, you should pay what you owe, right? Particularly to children. You should pay what you owe, or you're stealing, in particular, to children. Now, I'm sure you're all way ahead of me as far as this goes, this is highly relevant to the question or issue called neglect. When you have a child, and you keep that child, you have, hold, keep, and raise that child, you owe the child love, care, wisdom, time, attention, resources, and affection. You owe the child that just as surely as if you pay me for my time I owe you my time just as surely as if your wife your daughter works for, a week she's owed her pay if your daughter works for six months she's owed her pay to steal from adults is bad enough to steal from children is unholy.
[16:47] So I understand the hurt. I understand the upset. I understand the sorrow. I understand the self-pity. I understand the loss. I really do. But dear God, your parents did not pay their debts to you as a child that they voluntarily incurred by having, holding, and keeping you. It's more important than paying a week's dishwashing wages. It's more important than paying six months of wages for encyclopedia sales. It's more important than anything. And it goes on week after week, month after month, year after year, decade after decade. That you are not paid what you are owed. Now, when people owe you money and they refuse to pay you, and then when you point out that they are remiss in their payments they get angry and yell at you it's in the past, of course I paid you already I already paid you back I already paid you back double it's in the past what do you care about move on doesn't matter it's unimportant let's look to the future not the past, never happened.
[18:07] I don't owe you anything you owe me you want me.
[18:17] If you were neglected, your parents failed to pay you what they owed you, what they voluntarily morally contracted to pay you, which was time, care, love, attention, resources, wisdom, and affection.
[18:36] You were stolen from, and your parents robbed you and did not pay their debts, and generally when we are owed money and not only are we not paid but we're attacked insulted and put down for daring to bring up the fact that we are owed money that's about as shittier treatment as you can possibly receive in this life it's one thing you know i think we've all been in the position of being owed money that somebody's not paying, right? We've all been in that position of being owed money that somebody's not paying. It's pretty, pretty rough, man. I feel kind of helpless, especially when they start dodging and avoiding you. But what if you gently remonstrate with someone for not paying you what they owe you, and they escalate and get angry at you and attack you and humiliate you and call you a liar and a thief and a cheat. It's about as provocative a situation as can be conceived of.
[19:59] It's about as provocative a situation as can be conceived of. So I understand the hurt, the pain, the sorrow. I also understand how it's easier to believe not that you weren't paid, but that you were a bad worker, because that gets your employers off the hook. Well, the reason I wasn't paid is I was a bad worker, right? So the reason my parents didn't pay attention to me is because I was an uninteresting child. I was self-absorbed. I was shy. I was not engaging. I didn't particularly like to chat. I didn't have a big sense of humor. I wasn't full of charisma. I didn't play massive sports. I wasn't a trophy child. I guess I was boring, so it's not their fault, right? I mean, if you make some boring movie, you don't get to yell at the audience for not being interested. What is it, like the John Lennon video film of feet, five hours of feet? It's a little boring. Right? It's a little boring. If you write a droney song.
[21:20] Right? If you write a droney song and people don't really like it, you don't get to yell at them. It's just kind of a dull song.
[21:33] But as a child, isn't it so much easier, and in fact, it may be a foundational survival mechanism, isn't it so much easier, and maybe a foundational survival mechanism, to say, it's not that, my parents have failed to pay me what they owe me, which leaves me depressed and angry and helpless. It's not that my parents have failed to pay me what they owe me. It's that I have not earned that. I'm a bad worker who never shows up to work, drops all the plates, and so I'm not getting paid. They're deducting all the things I broke for my salary. Therefore, they owe me nothing because I'm an incompetent worker. That the reason my parents ignored me, the reason my parents didn't invest in me, the reason my parents didn't seem fascinated or happy or love me is because I'm just not appealing just not appealing, the reason I'm not getting paid is I'm a bad worker the reason my parents are neglecting me is because I'm boring and worthless and unimportant.
[22:43] Neglect is when people, your parents, steal from you, or try to steal from you, your entire soul for the sake of their own selfishness and laziness. Leaving you, thus, with almost the inevitable impression that it is not their failure but yours that has resulted in the neglect. It's not because he's an asshole employer who won't pay you it's not ripping you off you just dropped a lot of plates didn't do didn't sell any hey man you're on commission you didn't sell any encyclopedias of course you're not going to get paid it's 100 commission eat what you kill 100 commission and guess what sailor boy you didn't sell anything you don't get paid, it's not that they're ripping you off you just suck at this.
[23:33] And of course almost all of us choose the if you have to choose between your parents sucking and you sucking you'll say well i suck because if i my parents do suck and they get angry whenever i criticize them then if i say that they suck they're gonna get mad and angering parents was a very bad reproductive survival strategy when we were evolving getting the people who are responsible for your safety and security, who give you food and protect you from predators, getting them angry at you, maybe especially when your siblings didn't, is a pretty bad survival strategy.
[24:20] So, neglect toxicifies the relationship because you can't say that your parents are neglectful. you can only say that you're not worthy of attention. Ouchies. That's your only survival mechanism to say, well, no, no, no, they're not self-involved narcissistic assholes. I'm just about as interesting as watching toenails grow or paint dry. And I understand that as a survival mechanism, it is perfectly healthy and natural and good survival mechanism, but it comes at a little bit of a price. It comes at a little bit of a price. And the price is, you can't be loved.
[25:09] Because if you think your parents are right, and you're boring, uninteresting, self-involved, how's anyone supposed to love you are you supposed to love yourself or have affection for yourself or think positively about yourself how are you supposed to do any of that.
[25:36] Painful. And that's why people get stuck in Trash Planet. Well, you see, the fault is not mine, dear son. I'm perfectly capable of being interested in interesting things, but the category called interesting things does not include you. Ah, in fact, I would even go one step further, son. The category of interesting things is the polar opposite of you. You absolute dishrag of a spineless, jellyfish, uninteresting, puddle-brained human being. Not even human doing, just human being. Why don't you go and rot more on your computer and go hide up in your room and play with your little dinosaurs and make your little Spanish soap opera plots?
[26:29] Maybe a little more gaming, hmm? Maybe a little more secrecy. I mean, all I get are these monosyllabic non-answers to all of my questions. How am I supposed to be interested in that? I mean, just the other day, just the other day, my friend, my child, I asked you, what is your favorite genre of videos? You didn't seem to respond at all. Ah, let me give you a reenactment of how stellarly interesting you were as a child, dear boy. I ask you, how was school? You say, fine. Fine. Okay. Yes, fascinating. Scintillating, we've got iambic pentameter of the Shakespearean gods coming pouring out of your mouth. Like flame from the arse and armpits of a lava demon. Look at that coruscating syllables coming forward, tripping down, like the rockettes on cocaine during an earthquake. Flying like butterflies, your words course through the air, iridescent shimmering, scattering gorgeous sunbeams through the soul of my chandelier heart. How's school? Fine. Did you do anything? Not really. Just learn anything? Not much. Do you have any homework? A little.
[27:55] Yes, so interesting. So fascinating. That's a talk show. Called, huh? Welcome to the talk show called, huh? What's your favorite genre of video, son? Uh, no, I don't know. I mean, I don't know. I used to be into satisfying videos, but then I guess, like, Mom, got dissatisfied. Okay. Um, what's your favorite game? Valorant? What is it? Shooting? Is it fun? Yeah. Do you play with friends? Yeah. What happens? Well, you just shoot each other and try to win. That's it? Pretty much.
[28:41] Welcome to the talk show call. Yeah. Sure. Yeah, whatever. Yeah. Are there any girls you like? I mean, not really. They're okay. You gonna ask any girl out? I don't know. Maybe. You going to the dance? Probably. I don't know. Welcome to another Christopher Hitchens, Salman Rushdie-style Algonquin round table of fantastic language. It's like watching Shakespeare and Chaucer joust with polysyllabic Beowulf tongue. Ah, the teenage talk show called Whatever. And you say, you say you feel neglected. How about I, as your parents say, you're really freaking boring.
[29:46] You give me nothing. You say nothing. You resist everything. I've got paws as you could fit an entire pin to play into.
[30:06] Yeah. Yeah. Hey, did you enjoy your dinner? Yeah. What did you like about it? Oh, it tasted good. Hey, how'd you sleep? Fine. Did you get to bed late? Not really. Son, I've had easy time pulling. teeth from a great white shark than getting answers out of you, kid. And then you complain that I neglected you? I turn myself inside out, kid, trying to get a conversation out of you, and what do I get? Nah. Ha-ha. Nah. Nah. Nothing. No, not really. Maybe sort of kind of fog, fog, fog.
[31:02] Hey, do you, uh, do you want to come and help me? I've got some stuff to do in the garage. Would you like to come and help? No, I've, uh, I mean, I guess kind of, but, uh, I got homework. Well, that's it. I'm heading to bed. Kid, it's 9.30 at night. What do you do up there?
[31:23] I mean, I'd do a little reading, get some homework done. I'm going to get ready for tomorrow. I mean, what's it to you?
[31:40] Hit me with a y if you've been there catastrophic non-conversations with parents, the resistance the resentment the passive aggression the avoidance.
[32:09] You know, we're going to your aunt's on Sunday. It'd be really nice if you came. I mean, I know you're not really coming to church, but, you know, maybe we could swing by and pick you up afterwards. I mean, it'd be real nice. You know, she really, I mean, you may not remember this. She really, I mean, she really, she took care of you a lot when you were little. She really, she cares about you. She's always asking after you, and it would be nice. It would just be nice. I'm not saying you have to. It'd just be kind of nice if you showed up. I'm just talking an hour. We're not going to ask you to run a marathon. Just, you know, show up and, I don't know, ask her about her bunions, like whatever old people talk about, you know? I mean, she's old, she's not dead, and she misses you.
[32:51] Oh? I mean, it's a video game thing. Can't you move that? Oh, it's a contest? Okay. Okay. Well, I mean, just think about it at some point. I mean, it would be nice for her. And, I mean, I know you're like, you're kind of peer-oriented. I know, I get it. I mean, I was a teenager too. Like, your friends are very important. But, you know, I mean, odds are, you know, I don't want to give you the big spoiler, right, of your late teens. But odds are your friends are just going to, right, they're just going to despawn the different universities. They're going to go various places. What do you call it? The back rooms. And they're just going to go, they're going to go various places. You're probably not going to have much to do with them. But, you know, it could be the case that your aunt is going to be part of your life. And, I mean, who knows? Maybe she's got a zillion dollars and she'll leave us some money when she dies. No, it's not about the money. God, why would you just go to that? Don't be so suspicious. It's not about, I'm just, I'm making a joke. It's not, oh, I'm not asking you to pimp yourself out for money from the family. Come on.
[34:06] So, when you neglect your children, they don't want to talk to you. Also, if your children genuinely and deeply believe that you don't particularly care about them, they won't want to talk to you. And if they believe that any problem they have is going to be viewed as an intrusion, right? Okay, Dad, if you really want to know, I'm having a tough time at school, man. I'm really having a tough time at school. It's horrible. I hate going in. I mean, it's one science teacher that I like, but that's like it. It's horrible. You know, I mean, yeah, like three days last week, I ate my lunch in the toilet. Dad, I'm eating my lunch in the toilet. People banging on the door everything coming out I hope everything comes out alright.
[35:13] I can't stand it dad I hate being at school I hate being at school, I hate being at school do you know there was like this informal poll there was this informal poll.
[35:29] Who's the most, Who's the most hated kid in school? I wasn't at the top, but I mean, I was on the list, man. I don't know why, why, why, why? So funny, man.
[35:52] I feel like I'm like being hunted. Like every time I walk down the, I mean, I got to get out. I got, you got to get me out. I want to be homeschooled. I'm going to go to a different school. I need something different. I can't do this. I can't. What's your dad going to say? What's your dad and mom going to say? Well, son, you just got to find a way to push through it. You know, we all go through these difficult things and you'll be a stronger person for it. And I remember I was, kids were mean to me at school and, you know, you'll be fine. Just bear down and deal with it and it'll be fine, right? It'll be fine. No, dad, I can't stand it. I can't stand going to school. I hate it. I hate everything about it. You know, like, it used to be like Sunday afternoon, I'd start to get depressed and anxious. Now it's like Saturday afternoon, because I think it's 24 hours, and then I'll be, like, I can't stand it. I get like fucking, sorry, sorry, my dad. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. I get like 40 minutes from like 3.30 in the afternoon on Friday till 4.10 in the afternoon. I get thank god I don't have to come back for another couple of days.
[37:06] And because I hate being there, I can't do, I can't do the work. I, I don't like, even the work reminds me of how much I hate it. I can't do it. Like, you got to do something. You got to fix this. Look, I know I've got, I know I've got a brother and I, maybe he's fine. He's not, he's not helping me. He's not circling back. Like I've been so covered in fucking, sorry, sorry. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
[37:33] I've been so covered in loser dust in nerd fog that Bill avoids me at school too because he wants everyone to forget that I'm his brother, I mean I want to I try angling towards him and he shoots me this look like one step closer I'm going to open a trap door and send you to Hades.
[37:57] And once you get this loser pollen this, this nerd dust on you like it doesn't come off. And they hate me, man. They, they hate me. They hate me. I'm, I'm, I don't know why. I mean, I want to be nice. I try to be nice. I'm, I'm not doing anything to anyone. I'm, I'm, I mean, you know, I got to tell you, dad, you know, some of the kids, they share these memes. They would make mom like turn inside out and faint.
[38:41] I don't do any of that. Some of the kids who rag on other kids, they seem pretty popular. I think, I mean, I feel like the nicest kid. I feel like the nicest kid in the school. And everybody just hates me. And I don't have anything to do to change that. I don't have anything to do to change that. I can't, because now everything I do will just be fake. Right? So, I don't know, let's say I find I have some incredible skill at some stupid sport. Sorry, I know sports aren't stupid. I know you were a sports guy, Dad. But let's say I'm just incredible at something and everybody would be like, well, he just did that to get over the loser thing and the loser thing. Like, once it sticks, it's like a tattoo, man. Cannot get that stuff off.
[39:35] Now if you have a conversation like that with your parents would they give you a hug would they move heaven and earth to make things better for you would they rearrange their lives with their homeschool would they get you to a different situation would they go and confront the bully's parents what what would they do what would they do i wasn't just so you know just out of curiosity i mean if you in case you're curious um i really wasn't bullied in school i had one guy was going going to kill me, man. That went on for, I don't know, a week or two, but I had pretty good friends. I was very sporty. And so I myself wasn't bullied in school. So that's just so you know, that's an act of imagination. But if you had talked to your parents about that, would they have listened? Would they have tried to move heaven and earth to make things better for you?
[40:30] Would they have sympathized? Would they have said, yeah, school is terrible for the most part? I mean, it's, it either hollows you out and makes you popular or you're deep and hated.
[40:54] When you brought a problem to your parents' attention, neglectful parents will just view it as an intrusion, right? All they'll do is view it as an intrusion. It's an annoyance. It's an interference, right? It's an interference.
[41:21] Somebody says they would have talked over me about two words in, i learned not to swear around my parents soap does not go well as a dessert of spaghetti yeah, how on earth are you invoking these emotions you haven't been there in 40 years and again i was not i was really not bullied in school i was really not bullied i was i was fairly popular i was viewed as a little different but i was i was fairly popular in school, and it's funny because i was viewed probably as a little bit nerdy in my early to mid-teens and then i used to start going to discos and nightclubs uh at sort of 15 or 16 years of age and i remember um some of the cooler kids showed up when i was 17 and i was like busting all these dance moves and talking to all these uh girls and having a great time and like the last year and a half of high school was just like, coasting in that sense because the word got around like Stef was there doing all this wildy cool stuff right, somebody says I hid in the toilet and had no friends and hid it from them and was terrified if they found out I had to make so many lies so they wouldn't find out even though they clearly knew as I never hung out with anyone I was the loner of loners I'm really sorry about that, I'm really sorry big hugs for that.
[42:42] Big hugs for that. I'm so sorry. So these lame, stilted, bad conversations as teenagers happen because the children were neglected when they were kids. And so they don't want to connect and talk with their parents when they become teenagers.
[43:14] See there's a lot of parents and this is a bit more true with dads i think, happens with moms of course i think it's a bit more true with dads and what they say is well you know kids are kind of boring and repetitive and they want to hear the same story over and over again and i used to um when my daughter was very little i used to read we had a book of fairy tales and i used to read the fairy tales and she loved jack and the beanstalk no fee-fi-fo-fum i smell the blood of an englishman fee-fi it's a big acting thing and she just absolutely loved that and we would do that like for an hour or two and my voice was like freddie mercury singing another one bites the dust kind of nodule broken raw and um but i love the repetition i thought it was great I love the repetition. And every time she got into a particular movie, we would be the scenes in that movie. And we would have all the characters from that movie would make them all up and run around and do that kind of stuff. And it was great. But a lot of parents, this is true. Again, a little bit more true for dads. They're like, well, you know, you're not that interesting as a kid. But boy, when you become a teenager, I'm going to get more interested. And it's like, too late. Too late. That boat has sailed. That ship is sunk. There is no chance to have it later.
[44:30] No chance to have it later if you don't have it earlier. It's like saying, well, I'm going to have 23 bad dates with a woman and then I'm going to get her to marry me later. It's like, no, you won't get to the 23 bad dates. You won't get to the 23 bad dates.
[44:49] So, uh, it is not you who is deficient as a child. We view ourselves as our parents treat us. Sorry, simple fact, simple fact. And it's not how we always have to be, but it's certainly how it is for the first 20 to 25 years of our life.
[45:07] We view ourselves as our parents treat us. We have no choice. Because if they're cold, mean and cruel, if we point that out, right? I mean, can you imagine you've got some Fox News watching, screen addicted, distracted dad, right? And he's kind of been, he came home from work, he kind of sat through dinner on his phone, and then he goes and watches TV, and then you go in and like, oh, dad, dad, dad, dad. Get your fat ass off that couch, turn off the TV, be a big boy now, turn off the TV, do some goddamn parenting, all right? You chose to have me, you chose to keep me. try and, you know, see if you can just, I don't know if you need to massage your legs like you got blood clots from a transpolar flight. You need to get up, stretch a little, warm up if you have to.
[46:03] But you need to do some parenting, which means you need to play with me. You need to interact with me. You need to take some pleasure in my presence. You need to seek out my time. Woo me a little show some interest I don't care if you have to fake it I'm that desperate I don't care if you gotta fake it like mom does.
[46:26] But get your fat ass off that couch. And even if it's a chore for you, pretend it isn't, do some parenting. Oh, I don't know. How about, um, why don't you give me some wisdom so I don't have to invent everything from bald guys on the internet and from, uh, TikTok? How about I don't have to invent every human value known to man? How about you give me a little wisdom? Some advice, some thoughts, a little bit here on how to navigate. The world, conflicts, relationships. I mean, you were in school a lot longer than I've been. Anything. Anything. Anything. Oh, I got an idea. How about you give a rat's ass about the music I like? You know, just a thought. My daughter's into something called Nerdcore. Didn't even know it was a thing. It's actually pretty good. Check out JT Music. It's pretty good stuff. Pretty good stuff.
[47:28] How about you show an interest in what I'm doing on the computer? How about you show an interest in the books? I like to read. How about you know anything, anything about my friends? How about you know if I have friends? Maybe their names would be nice a little bit. How about you know what my hobbies are? Do you have any idea what I like to do with my spare time? Anything, anything. because you know you're kind of welded to that screen but you know i mean it's funny because you know mom says hey look the dishes in the sink and you're like up and doing stuff and yet i'm just rotten here in the corner anything anything i don't care anything, oh except it can't be getting yelled at for holding the flashlight wrong because you're fixing something in a dark corner that no no not doing that you don't get to roll your parenting into stupid chores you have to do.
[48:24] Something that's focused on me, something that's focused on me. Oh, okay, let's do a little quiz, Dad. Mom, you can sit, Jim, join, join in, you can sit here too. What's my favorite band? What's my favorite song? What's my favorite book? Who's my favorite celebrity? What is my secret dream? What ability do I wish I had the most? What's my favorite color? What's the food that I, I know the food, you'd know that, Mom, right? But what's the, what's the, what style of food? Like what ethnicity of food do I like to eat the most? Um what was my I know mom you know my last major health issue dad you wouldn't even know if I'd lost an arm I think so yeah just you know get your ass off the couch and get some damn parenting done it kind of is your job right and I mean if you don't that's fine if you don't that's fine but, basically when I'm gone I'm like Wile E. Coyote through a wall I'm gone and I'm gone right now if you were to say to your dad, get your fat butt off the couch and get some parenting done, what would have happened? How dare you? I can't believe I do everything with this family.
[49:37] Just noises in angry narcissist. Angry narcissist noises intensify. So you can't say any of that. You can't say, dad, you're a lazy ass parent. You're a lazy parent. You're a lazy parent. And when was the last time you really took an interest in something that I'm interested in? My dad, all he did was watch sports ball instead of doing any parenting. He would knock me flying across the room. Right. And I'm really sorry for that too. But that means, of course, you can't. You certainly can't blame yourself. And you couldn't have fixed the problem when you were a kid. So then you have to say, well.
[50:31] I guess I'm just boring. Yeah, dad's totally rational. I guess I'm just, I'm just boring. He would rather watch roided up, rage monsters throw pigskin around, than interact with his child and have a conversation with his child. Alrighty then. Alrighty then. Delightful. Delightful. So.
[51:06] All right. Thank you for your indulgence. Hope it was helpful. And let's have a look here. Is sexlessness in a marriage always a sign of a deeper issue? What should a wife do if a husband's porn addiction is revealed long after the commitment is made and the children have been born. I'm too embarrassed to call in. Well, it's not in particular to that addiction, but you should really have honest conversations before you get married, right? You should have honest conversations about bad habits or whatever you want to call it.
[51:53] Somebody says, I did a call in with you two years ago. My parents didn't even ask to hear it. My gosh, I bet you they would hate to hear it as a whole. Somebody says i managed to probe him as a teenager and audio recorded his response and screaming matches yeah isn't that wild that you can have that, somewhere there exists maybe not anymore maybe somewhere in my mom's the bowels of my mom's trash planet but uh there was a recording of me trying to record i mean i must have been, 11 or 12 and me trying to record music box dancer on the radio which was this little song i really liked back in the day and my whole family crabbing about this and that's not your tape yes it is i've recorded something important on that just stupid naggy crap right just stupid naggy crap that people have.
[52:46] Hey, Molly. Hello, Alec. All right. So, sorry, let me just get back to your questions. Yeah, so sexlessness in marriage. What is occurring with sexlessness in a marriage? Well, I mean, I've had a bunch of conversations with people about this. Obviously, I'm no doctor. You should go if you have issues with sexual desire or you have sexual performance issues and so on. In my humble opinion, I'm not giving any medical advice. in my humble opinion if I was in that situation I would go and see a doctor I would get blood work done I would have everything checked out physically, just make sure that you're not viewing as a psychological issue something that could be a physical issue right.
[53:34] So you have to meet the as a man you have to meet female sexuality in the middle right And for women, you have to meet male sexuality in the middle, right? So there are some women who are like, well, female sexuality is beautiful, and male sexuality is just empty lust, right? And it's considered negative, right? And so...
[54:01] For men, you do have to understand that the woman needs to feel treasured and wooed and loved. And then she'll be more likely to be in the mood.
[54:11] Whereas for a lot of men, if they have sex, then they feel treasured, wooed and loved, right? So you just have to meet the other sex in the middle and know that the combination of the two is probably what is best. But yeah, sexlessness in a marriage is usually a sign of, in my humble opinion, right? I don't have any studies on this. But sexlessness in a marriage, assuming there's no sort of particular physical issue, is anger. Anger and distance, right? I mean, anger can really bring people close. But being angry with each other can really bring people close because it shows you care, it shows you're passionate about a topic, and it shows that you want to stand up for the marriage as a whole or the relationship as a whole. And so anger can be really healthy, but a lot of times, because we've had toxic rageaholics in our lives, anger is viewed as something that blows people apart. And then, let's say you're angry at your wife and she just shuts down, she punishes you, she withdraws, she slams doors, and then she goes out and she just won't talk to you until you apologize and your anger is absolutely unacceptable you cannot be angry in the relationship and then it's like okay so um i'm my genuine experiences are not welcome here i mean i'm angry if i'm angry.
[55:38] Right why is that why is that a problem well i mean i get that rage and manipulation and bullying and so on that's a problem but anger is not those things.
[55:49] I mean, people pretend to be angry, but they're just in a perpetual state of manipulation. That's all. It's not real. It's not genuine. It's not honest. Genuine anger can really be helpful. So if, for instance, let's say that you have your wife, she has a really toxic mother, right? And maybe you've dealt with all of that or whatever, right? She's a really toxic mother. And then every now and then, that toxic mother is going to creep into the relationship. Or if you have a husband whose father was really dissociated and disconnected, that dissociation and disconnection is going to creep into the relationship. And you'll work with it, but sometimes you can only dislodge the ghosts of bad people from the past by getting angry. And exorcism isn't just tears and praying, sometimes it's anger and holy water and catawalling.
[56:42] To protect a marriage from the dysfunctional ghosts of decades past sometimes requires anger. all self-protection is bound up with anger. All self-protection is bound up with anger. The pretense of anger in order to silence others, the bullying of anger, that's rage, that's manipulation. It's nothing authentic or real. Rage and manipulation are designed to drive out the truth. Anger is frustration when you can't get to the truth, when there's things in the way of the truth. So sexlessness in a marriage, you're just punishing each other. You know, if you lock someone in your basement and you don't feed them, it's because you hate them. You want them to hurt, you want them to suffer, right? So if you get into a monogamous sexual relationship and then neither of you figure out how you can happily provide sex with each other.
[57:41] That's because you're angry with each other, and you have been, I assume, you've both been so frightened and scarred by anger and rage and manipulation in the past that you view all anger as destructive and abusive. Therefore, you don't have any way of protecting yourself from intrusions, from the past, from the inner mother or father, whoever, right?
[58:03] And so if your wife gets possessed by say a dysfunctional mother and you get angry that is to drive out the dysfunctional mother but if she won't let you get angry or won't accept you getting angry then your wife gets taken over by her mother and then your sexual desire evaporates, because you don't have a mother-in-law fetish because you're not insane right so anyway it could be any number of things but that would be i would first install uh if you want to do a call in in private, freedomain.com slash call and just choose the private option. All right.
[58:37] Good evening, Stef. Would you say that you were the same person that you were 10, 20, 30 years ago? If you have changed, is it possible that when people say that partners changed resulting in the end of their relationship, that maybe there is some truth to it? I don't experience this as a particularly honest question. This feels like a kind of gotcha, right? So, the reasoning would go something like this. Well, Stef, you're not exactly the same person that you were 30 years ago. I mean, God, man, 30 years ago, you were 28. I thought it was 18 for a sec. It's like, no, no. So, yeah, 30 years ago, you were 28 years old. Are you saying you're exactly the same now as you were when you were 28? Well, no. Then people change, and therefore, Or people can get into relationships and they can change. And therefore, how dare you say to people, if they say, well, my partner just changed. It's like, no, they didn't. You've changed, right? So it feels like a little bit like being put into a corner, I think, unfairly.
[59:44] It's sort of like cancer is when the cells grow uncontrollably, right? And it's like saying, so are you saying that your cells have never renewed ever in your life? it's like well yeah but that's the difference between cells we're doing which is growth of cells and rampant growth of cells called cancer the these things are not the same right, you know, breathing is very important for your health. Oh, are you saying you've never held your breath in your entire life? It's like, no, that's not really the same category. So if in terms of being the same person, let's say 30 years ago when I was 28, well, 28, I'd already been 13 years into philosophy. I started when I was 15. So 28, I was already in, I was a free market guy. I was a universal morality guy. I was at that point a minarchist, not a voluntarist. And I believed in communication and I exercised. So I would say that my values have not foundationally changed. How I manifest those values has changed a little bit and they've certainly extended themselves. But if, you know, I mean, my wife, let's go 22 years ago, 23 years ago, I met my wife, right? So almost a quarter century ago, I met my wife.
[1:00:55] And she is the same person as I met foundationally. Of course, there have been growth and changes and all of that, but she's the same person. Personality is remarkably stable. And I mean, I mentioned this before that many years ago, I was visiting a friend who happened to live right next to the high school we both went to. And there was a high school reunion and we just went, right? I didn't even shave, do a haircut because, you know, people try to look good for these kinds of things, right? And I was around and everybody was the same. And they even said to me, my God, you're the same. You're the same. So i would say i didn't go from i don't know like evil to good or or anything like that um i've always been cautious i've never done drugs i've always been cautious about, alcohol and i think i last got drunk i mean close to 40 years ago i was what maybe 21 i last got drunk it was a uh an after party for a play i was in and that was it i was like well this is horrible the spins are horrible and losing your sunday to vague headaches is all horrible so, um you know am i going to wake up tomorrow and hate philosophy no am i going to wake up tomorrow with an inability to uh do shows no.
[1:02:10] You know, am I going to wake up tomorrow with anything other than an okay amateur half singing voice? No, no. I mean, it's just the way that it is, right?
[1:02:22] It's just the way that it is.
[1:02:32] Alex says, my mother criticized me so badly that it made me suicidal. I'm so sorry about that. But, you know, murderous thoughts and instincts on the part of mothers is really common. I mean, it's common with dads too, but murderous thoughts from mothers is a lot more common than people want to think. And we all know these sort of extreme cases where there's a family annihilator, like a mother. But um yeah murderous thoughts on behalf of mothers it's not so much that you're, i mean my humble opinion obviously i'm i'm sorry if i'm stepping out of line of course right, but i would probably try to work with it like this and again with all due humility that i'm just going off a chance comment of yours, but it would be something like, it's not like your mother criticized you to the point where you became suicidal, it's that you internalized your mother's desire for you to die in order to please her because pleasing her was necessary for your survival. I mean, my mother openly hated her children from time to time, for sure.
[1:03:59] Yeah, the fact that you can record all of this stuff now is pretty wild, right?
[1:04:16] He says, I know a guy who did everything right. Seemingly amazing job. Unbelievably great writer. Listen to your show, I believe, as well. Although he told me he couldn't quit watching porn even shortly after his huge wedding, getting married to his wife. Well but i think isn't that is a lot of shame weapon for women right how dare you it's like cheating and so on i mean you're married to the guy you i think you just have to try and be curious and figure these things out.
[1:04:47] Hint to detect manipulation masking as anger equals emotional liability hint to detect manipulation masking as anger equals emotional liability yeah they just changed is covered in my book real-time relationships that's vanity to think that yeah for sure, have you done a truth about episode on siblings, Yeah, again, you'll have to tell me more about what you're talking about. I know that even under fairly loosey-goosey standards at the moment, 50% of sibling relationships are classified as abusive. And abusive sibling relationships. Abusive sibling relationships are often worse because you're supposed to be allies. Like, you're supposed to be, I remember reading through Lord of the Rings, and when it came to sort of the, I mean, Frodo and Samwise are analogies for siblings confronting lies and manipulation at the heart of a family, right? Lability. Oh, lability.
[1:06:01] Flexibility? Oh, continually undergoing change or breakdown. Sorry, I assumed that was a typo. My bad. Sorry about that. Emotional lability. Yeah, yeah. It's manipulation when there's a goal and there's a twist and turn to get to the goal and there's not an honest and direct communication. There's a manipulation when you are portrayed as being at fault no matter what. It is a manipulation when everything has an agenda and there's a goal like it's a manipulation if the guy just wants to sleep with the girl and doesn't really care about her everything will be manipulative right so.
[1:06:49] Uh, hi Stef, what made it fully click to you, your brain and subconscious, that you were free from trash planet, oh yeah, so there were, there were two, I won't get into the details of the people, but there were two incidents, where I was just like, god, what am I doing here, there were two incidents, one was, I was going to visit someone, at a cottage.
[1:07:21] And it took forever to get there. And I got to the cottage and I stayed, I was supposed to stay the Friday and the Saturday night and then leave on the Sunday. And I went there for dinner and everybody was making these kind of coarse jokes and it just felt... Dostoevsky notes from the house of the dead memoirs from the house of the dead it just felt cold and chilly and a kind of inhuman, and everybody was subtly putting everything down everybody was aping their superiority and it was just, creepy be. And I was like, what am I doing? This is, this is not, this is not, it's not for me. This is not for me. I can't, I can't, I can barely breathe here. Everybody was just weird.
[1:08:30] Like, uh, half misfiring robots of automatic history or something like that. There was no and i couldn't and i realized i couldn't say i couldn't say this is there's an odd air to this gathering do you guys feel that there's something odd about this gathering, something's not right i couldn't say that because that would be to be vulnerable among people to whom status is everything and if you can you can be vulnerable around people but not if anybody's interested in status or foundationally driven by status you can't be vulnerable around them because then they'll just mock you and put you down, because that gives them higher status. So I just remember thinking, okay, there's something not right about all of this and I can't point it out. And I can't fix it and I don't want it. And I did stay that night because it was too late to drive home, but then I just made an excuse that I had something to do in the business realm. And I was an entrepreneur back then, as I am now, but in the software field. And I just made my escape and I never went back. that was number one number and i was just like okay that and that was one of the last times i saw i think that might have been the last time i saw a lot of those people um the next one.
[1:09:48] This was a dinner party. It was like a dinner party. And these are among people, again, I'm not going to get into any details, but this is with people who I knew could throw a fantastic dinner party. And they put no effort into it. I was there with my then-girlfriend, soon-to-be-fiance, soon-to-be-wife, which put no effort into it. They gave her like a half frozen veggie burger patty like it was just and it was just like, no and then yeah again people are just making these sort of coarse jokes and this harsh laughter and everybody was so cynical and i was just like this cold man this is just this is cold and empty, this is this is people hollowed out no spontaneity no genuine emotion no connection and i can't say how weird this is because if i say how weird this is people will turn.
[1:10:50] I would describe to someone i would describe that environment as the absence of the holy ghost in that place yeah i follow the promptings and leave you know that is um that is a really perfect way to put it that is a really perfect way to put it thank you, thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you, thoughts on forgetfulness about past traumatic experiences. What is the best way you'd recommend to tap into what one went through as a child? For me, I blanked some of my really bad childhood experiences out. I have a hard time getting through some fog and the blanking to really feel how I felt and remember the situations adequately. Why do you want to re-experience past trauma.
[1:11:45] Would you like to know how to get over a bad childhood? Hopefully I have a little bit of credibility. With regards to this, would you like to know how to get over a bad childhood? Unrelated, but freedomain.com slash donate. Unrelated, but freedomain.com slash donate. I can tell you how to get over a bad childhood. And this is embedded in the call-in shows as a whole, but it might as well give you the abstract principle here. The way you get out of a bad childhood, the way you overcome a bad childhood, the way you put it in the past, the way you get over it, is to do the opposite of what you had to do, right? If you were starved, if you were half starved to death, how do you, regain your weight? Well, you do the opposite of starving and you eat well.
[1:12:39] If as a child you were forced to lie you tell the truth you tell the truth, if as a child you were forced to defer to crazy people stop deferring to crazy people, you just do the opposite what was forbidden becomes permissible what was permissible becomes forbidden. If you were forced to lie, stop lying and tell the truth. If you were forced to defer to crazy people, stop deferring to crazy people. If you were forced into silence, speak up. That's how you signal to your unconscious, the childhood is over. Your childhood lasts as long as its habits. Your childhood lasts as long as the habits enforced upon you in your childhood. How do you know when you're done school? You stop going to school.
[1:13:52] Instead of going to school, you go not to school.
[1:14:04] I was forced to submit to crazy people when I was a child.
[1:14:14] I was forced to submit to crazy people as a child I had to bite my tongue and shut up because they got fucking angry and violent, so how do I know when childhood is over when I say fuck you to the violent people and speak up. Does that make sense? As a child, I could not tell the truth to my parents. As an adult, I told the truth to my parents. As a child, I was not allowed to speak up and speak out against the lies of my teachers and professors. As an adult i have a whole series called the truth about dot dot dot carl marx the native american genocide uh israel and palestine robin williams donald trump right i couldn't tell the truth because i'd get punished failed ostracized exercised boom failed.
[1:15:39] So how do I know my childhood is over? Because I could just tell the truth. I mean, yes, I'll get punished for it, whatever, right? But I could still do it. I can survive the punishment. If your childhood was subjugated, your childhood lasts as long as your subjugation does. If in your childhood you were forced to lie, your childhood lasts as long as your lies. And I totally sympathize with everyone who was forced to lie as a child. Hugely sympathize, absolutely, completely and totally, nothing but sympathy. But as an adult, you don't have to. Spoiler, as an adult, you can tell the truth. Is it going to cost you at times? Absolutely.
[1:16:24] Absolutely. But if you never tell the truth and you were forced to lie as a child, all you're saying is that childhood will never, ever, ever end.
[1:16:44] The way you overcome a bad childhood is you do the opposite of what was forced upon you as a child, thank you for the tip I appreciate that, thank you for your Joseph McCarthy video it's worth far more than $50 thank you I appreciate that.
[1:17:13] Israel just attacked Iran. Yeah, I remember when I was playing Macbeth, we were in rehearsal and we were told that Israel had just bombed Iran. And we thought it might all be over. All of it. Israel has launched long-awaited counter-strike on Iran. Israel launches strikes against Iran in response to ballistic missile attacks, it's funny how they say strikes, I mean the whole point of the military is to break things and kill people, months of continuous attacks from Iran On October 1st, Iran launched nearly 200 ballistic missiles at Israel. I mean, in general, war is the subjugation of the domestic population. Right. This is incredible. Thank you. You're welcome. Looking well, Stef. Thank you. Politics is scary to hear.
[1:18:36] Politics is nothing more than the shadow cast by the population's desperation to lie to itself. If people would stop lying to themselves, politics would lose power. Politics is the shadow of Satan cast by the lies blocking the light of truth from the world, right? People want to lie to themselves. Want to lie to themselves. My team good, your team bad. Because they want to lie to themselves, you get violence and destruction. And because they lie to themselves, they have to be incredibly brutal on their children, which, well, we know that cycle, right? The state is the macrocosm of the abusive family. All right. Trump might bring us to war with Iran. I don't think so. I mean, based upon the track history, there were virtually, I mean, there were no new wars that America got involved in during the four years of Trump.
[1:19:55] Although COVID was kind of at war in a way. So I'm not based upon prior experiences. All right. Any other last questions, comments, issues? I appreciate your time tonight. That's good. I will check out. I do like a good horror movie. The others with Nicole Kidman was great I do like a good horror movie but it's hard to find one that isn't just cheap ass junk food jump scares, yeah so the beautiful thing about philosophy is you don't have to lie to your children and because you don't have to lie to your children you don't have to be horrible and aggressive in your proselytizing of your values you don't have to frighten them into compliance because you can reason them into knowledge, Israel is not striking Iranian oil fields or nuclear facilities. It's pretty hard to beat the Israelis. Pretty hard to beat the Israelis. I mean, when they can do this whole pager thing, it's pretty tough to beat the Israelis. Do you think dream analysis is possible with your AIs? We're working on it. Yeah, we're working on it.
[1:21:22] The second coming of Jesus is soon yeah no, no this has been a really amazing show I like the vibe on Friday Night Lies I appreciate that, I appreciate that and great questions guys and I really do thank you for your support if you're listening to this later freedomain.com I would love to love to love to get your support, and the call-in AI analyzed my dream. Yes. Oh, I did a fantastic dream analysis two nights ago. Ooh, what a dream analysis. Holy crap. Holy crap.
[1:22:06] The dream analysis of a couple of nights ago. It'll be out at some point soon, but it was something else, man. It will matter as deep as you can go without getting into the corner of a black hole. All right. Uh, so, uh, we're also, uh, going to be, we are releasing, in fact, the, um, let me just see if I can get the link. Uh, just for those of you who are listening to this, uh, you may not be supporters of the show as a whole, and that's, that's fine, I don't care, it hurt me, um, but, um.
[1:22:39] Oh fine i can update um but the um one of the ais is loose in the wild at the moment, one of the ais is loose in the wild and even if you're not a supporter a donor you can, get and play around with the ai which is great and let me just see if i can get, the linky link oh no it's installing see anyway hang on just a sec i'll be back in a literal, flash but you should absolutely try the ais they really are good sometimes i wonder why people choose their abusive families over philosophy well you're going to serve someone you either serve reason or you serve crazy people because craziness doesn't speak for itself so you either follow reason, or you're a slave to crazy people. And the only chance we have for liberty is enslavement to reason, so to speak. Nature to be commanded must be obeyed. And liberty to be achieved requires subjugation of the angry mammal will to the dictates of reason and evidence.
[1:24:00] All right, let me see here.
[1:24:06] Yes, the call-in AI. So we took, I don't know, 110, 120 call-in shows. That's quite a lot of work. We took 110, 120 call-in shows. We split up the transcripts, and we fed my side and the other person's side into the AI. And some people, and you can go and ask that AI. So I'd ideally like to, and we're trying to work on this. Thank you, Matthew. you i ideally would like to have it you be able to talk to me and have it talk back like me that way i can be immortal beloved but uh let's see here but that's still still to come still to come, uh so yeah you can go uh freedomain.com slash and these are hyphens call dash in dash ai dash preview so freedomain.com slash call dash in dash ai dash preview and you can go and check it out, And it's obviously not the same as a call-in show with me, but it's not the total opposite either. And, of course, it's available for free. You can share it with others and have them give it a try. And it's really, really good.
[1:25:15] Stef, would you listen to Some Might Say by Oasis? Please. You said you never listen to them. Look Back in Anger is a great song. Great song. A great, great, great song. I never tire of that song, to be honest with you. But I will check out the album I appreciate that alright thanks everyone for a gloriously delightful deep evening I really really do appreciate it if you're listening later freedomain.com.
[1:25:41] Slash donate to help out the show and enjoy all your benefits don't forget to go to fdrurl.com slash locals if you want to try the locals community for free and also, if you want to check out the TikTok channel. I'd appreciate it if you would subscribe to that and share that around. That's fdrurl.com slash TikTok. Have a beautiful evening, everyone. That's a lot from up here. I'll talk to you soon. Bye.
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