5 January 2024 Livestream

Setting the Tone for a Serious Discussion

[0:00] All right, let's get going. Friday night it is. No, we'll listen tomorrow. Yeah, fair.
Fair. Well, should we start with something deadly serious?
Should we? Should we? Should we start with something deadly serious? I'm sure we should.
I'm sure we should. And maybe we will.
Maybe we will. well there's this story i kind of i i look almost emotionally need it to be true if this makes any sense like it's it's a deep emotional thing i i absolutely need this story to be to be to be true, even if it's not like it just has to be true so if you find out that it's not true, uh i hate to say it i don't want to know i i i generally don't want to start out with a denial isle of knowledge, but in this case, like I just, sorry, it has to be. It has to be. All right.
Do you do Reddit? Do you do Reddit? Are you Redditorous?

[1:12] Do you? Do you Reddit? Reddit?
Roger Taylor, 7 foot monstrous. I was reading about that. 7 to 10 foot monstrous.
Interdimensional beings in a Miami mall. yes independence day it is not you're not redditors all right okay so here's the story that i i desperately desperately need to be true now uh you are of course the audience this is a, young woman do i do hit me with a y with young woman if i do do i do this with young woman voice, do i do this with a young woman voice or just straight uh you you let me know because you'll be on the receiving end of the all-purposed potential valley girl so you tell me if i'm doing that uh oh no i know okay we've got to know jared here's my valley girl voice every day in a staff meeting yes do the young woman you're trying to mess with my oh wait sorry i get it get it you're trying to mess with my marriage for a sec there uh oh it's 50 50 which means every other the world, every other word has to be a valley girl.
Wow, this is about as 50-50 a thing as I've ever seen. It's good to know.
Don't forget to tip. I mean, I know you haven't tipped yet. We're just starting.
But the vocal, the Ontario girl voice. All right. Okay.

[2:40] I'm a 31-year-old female. My husband is 33-year-old and male.
He's four years. We've been married for four years. Doesn't take our role playing serious when we have sex. sex.
He purposefully takes his characters way over the top.
And this is in you slash roleplay gone bad.
So we've been with each other for like six years. Our sex life is just as good as when it started. I just wanted to try out some kinkier stuff.
So I suggested roleplay.
Kevin, my husband, was somewhat open to the idea, but also thought it was a bit ridiculous.
This is something I've always wanted to try, sort of like a fetish.
So we got a few costumes, a cop outfit and a spy trench coat for him, and a nurse and cheerleader outfit for me.
All of our roleplaying revolves around one person being in character and the other interacting with that.
But he takes his roles as a joke. He goes intentionally extreme with the roles.
I know he thinks it's a bit ridiculous, and I know he has more fun when he does this, but I want a real roleplay. For example...

Role-playing with a Sexy Cop Twist

[3:59] Okay oh maybe maybe it'll translate maybe it won't maybe it won't um for example when he dresses up as the cop he was supposed to do a stop and frisk me arrest me etc but in a sexy way but instead he kicks open the door screams hands up this is a ride and basically tackles me to the bed this is Okay, it's not abuse. We have rough dom sub-sex all the time.
He handcuffs me, literally reads me my Miranda rights, leaves me there and rummages through the drawers, throwing stuff everywhere.
Pulls out a little baggie of weed and goes apeshit like a cop might.
I play along, try to get him to let me go if I can do sexual favors for him.
Then we have some rough sex with handcuffs and everything.
The actual sex was good, but he kept speaking into his fake radio, calling for backup. When I was on top, he would shout, Officer down! Officer down!
This has to be true I don't want to live in a world where this is not true, with the spy outfit he would come in and check me for wires and do the whole pink panther thing where he says it is lovely weather that we are having while sneaking up to the drapes and then beating the drapes up I was envisioning a more James Bond-esque seduction question.

Hilarious Roleplay Mishaps and Commitment

[5:26] Oh god help him if they played prison guard or iraq electronic electric torture unit but oh my god this i mean it has to be true it has to be true um yeah it it really it has to be true and of course the husbands are great right uh the comments are great um another good example of committing to the bit for you.
Sexy Inspector Clouseau roleplay has absolutely killed me. Kevin's found his real calling. Actor.
He's already doing something he doesn't want to do. I don't know.
Let him have his win. This sounds like he's having a blast. Why take the joy out of it?
Use the... Up the ante and have him do some repair work around the house before laying the pipe.
Brilliant. Rummaging through the drawers. See, I thought that the roleplay involved rummaging through drawers but apparently this was all misunderstood um that is don't ask someone to role play if you're not ready for them to play a role role playing always sounds, horrid to me but this guy's onto something, that is um that is some great stuff officer down.

[6:45] You gotta respect this commitment i think that is very very good um men will really read this and say hell yeah i just i don't know if this goes on and on but it really really should and uh yeah that's really something uh this is uh that is that is brilliant and you really you You can't fault that.
You just can't fault that.
I mean, I find this whole idea of role-playing to be quite bizarre and unusual.
But, you know, hey, I mean, I'm in a stage of life where, to some degree, whatever floats your boat.
The actual sex was good, but he kept speaking into his fake radio, calling for a backup. Backup.
When I was on top, he would shout, Officer Dan, Officer Dan.
Oh my gosh. He is, he's just a hero of mine. You know, I don't have a lot of heroes.
I meet most of my heroes when shaving. But God forbid men have hobbies.

[7:56] How can, how could the sex be good if he's screaming into his fake radio calling for backup? Ha ha.
Oh my gosh that is um i don't know if that's true but i just need it to be true i you know come on i don't and i don't other than the endless needs um don't don't do cowboys and indians, tell me what what role play should they not do irs inspector and audit it i don't know man uh shots fired.

[8:42] Oh what are you spanker buttocks crying out that you're a swat team i don't know man that's something else but yeah that i just um it's one of the few tweets that i i literally couldn't read all the way through i ended up um queen victoria and a horse i don't know what that is but but it got weird when his buddy showed up in a car car.
Or did it get perfect? Really, really hard to say. Don't do the Stefan Bluetooth.
That's right. I'm doing Irish and I'm doing Irish Visigoths and Cossacks and Vikings.

[9:17] Oh my gosh. I'm so tired of hearing people hearing say marriage is too risky.
I mean, you got to wonder if they have kids and it doesn't sound like they have kids so maybe that's sort of part of it to you know put a slightly serious note on it but um that was really one of the greatest i think tweets that has ever uh ever existed uh in this in this world and ever will exist in this world and i just i have a new hero i have a new hero and what can you what can you say other than you just have to salute you absolutely just have to salute that that kind of commitment and that he would keep a straight face with all of this is really something and i don't know what to say other than good on you mate good on you all right well let's get your let's get your questions and comments i will i can absolutely get serious not yet but soon but soon i can get serious so yeah don't forget part 15 of, uh peaceful parenting drill sergeant and recruit, What is your major malfunction, son?

[10:29] Oh my gosh oh my gosh, yeah that's uh that's really something um i uh obviously when you read these kinds of things you do you know that's a very popular tweet and my first thought was legend my second thought was this is the funniest thing i've read in forever and my third thought third thought was how can i I, how can I, how can I roll this into or incorporate this into what I do?
And I, um, I'm still working on it. Uh, I'm still working on it.
Um, I've actually, I figured what I'd like to do is get all of the costumes of the guys from the village people and, uh, well, them wear them all at the same time and, uh, role play everyone and everything at all the times and under all circumstances.
All the gay fantasies shall be owned by this deaf bot.
It's crazy how much women overshare.

[11:35] Women tell everything. I couldn't imagine revealing such details about my life.
I know stuff about some men I wish I didn't. Pretty funny stuff, though. All from women.
If you've ever been a fly on the wall with a female conversation, you emerge from that a broken and reshaped man.

Overhearing Women's Conversations and Scarring Experiences

[11:52] It's like the sword of Elendil Like it gets broken You get broken into shards for a couple of thousand years And then hopefully you get reforged for the final battle But if you've ever been in a situation Where you are listening to women I don't mean like eavesdropping or anything But every now and then I've been in a situation in my life Where I'm listening to women And not sort of aiming to It just kind of happens that way And it is It is a scarring experience, It is a scarring experience, Yeah, congressmen and budget, that would be the one, right? Politics and the next generation. Oof. Oof.
Yeah, it's funny watching all of this stuff drop with Epstein and the documents, although most of it's old hat.
But female locker room talk is coarser than men's.
Men tend to be, I mean, the men that I know tend to be pretty reserved that way. and it wouldn't be something that most of the men that I know would get involved in, that kind of locker room.
Boomer pensions and the unborn. Yeah, yeah.

[13:00] I didn't even think there was one Harvard law professor who wanted the age of consent lowered to 14. Apparently there is.
All right, let me just drop by here and let me get to your questions and comments. He didn't tase her.
Maybe he did. Maybe that's the roleplay going just a little too far.
Maybe that's the roleplay going just a little too far.
It really is amazing to me the number of people who seem to think of it as vaguely credible that there are seven to ten foot tall smoky multidimensional monsters wandering around a Miami mall.
That's really something, man. Oh, man, that's really something. something.
Credulity is the modern cult and skepticism is a lost art in general.
It's really, really quite sad.
All right, well, while I'm waiting for you, let me see what else I have.

[14:09] Oh, yes. In recent decades, the intelligence quotient, the IQ of university students and university graduates dropped to the average of the general population.
Hit me with a why if you saw this coming based upon what I've said or what other people have said that over the past couple of decades.
So, according to a widespread belief, the average IQ of university students is 115 to 130 IQ points.
That is substantially higher than the average IQ of the general population.
We trace the origin of this belief to obsolete intelligence data collected in the 1940s and the 1950s, when university education was the privilege of a few.
Examination of more recent IQ data indicate that the IQ of university students and university graduates graduates dropped to the average of the general population.

[15:05] Yeah, because only 8 to 10 percent of people used to go to university.
And then, I mean, there's a couple of waves that happened that destroyed university.
One was the GI Bill, of course, where just about anybody in their dark could go to university.
And universities get paid for the people who attend, not for the people who successfully graduate, right?
Universities should get paid as a percentage of your paycheck that you you get after you graduate in your field, right?
You get a job and you're, if you're training someone in geology, the university should get paid by, you know, five years worth of 10% of your paycheck in the field of geology.
And that way they're training you to get into the marketplace, but they get paid by the government in general or by private people just for the number of people there.
So they can coast for at least half a generation, 15 to 20 years, maybe on reputation.
And then it all, it all falls apart.
So that's, um. uh inevitable and we we talked about this um, Surprise, it's not below the general population.

University Degrees as a Measure of Capability

[16:07] So, yeah, it's ridiculous. Yeah, employers can no longer rely on applicants with university degrees to be more capable or smarter than those without degrees.
Of course, and this is one of the reasons why universities hate the IQ data, because if you could just give people an IQ test, then it would be much better for them in terms of much cheaper and a much more efficient way to get them into the workplace.
Place it would identify poor and uh but poor but talented individuals of every sex and race but i think it was in the 19 either late 1960s early 1970s duke power versus the supreme court uh it became it's one of these things like it's not totally illegal to use iq tests but um anything which produces disparate outcomes is going to be a problem you could get sued so they They gave up on that.
So then they started using the university degree as a proxy for IQ.
IQ predicts your success in a complex job, I think, with 80% accuracy.
Like it's the highest metric around for testing these kinds of things.
And so they went to universities.
And then now I don't know where they're going to go. Now, who knows, right?
So let's see here. There was something else.

[17:27] So this is another thing um uh anton lave anton lave was uh a satanist right, and there's a you can look up a picture of him he's like a bald guy with one of those like goatee satan goatee things right uh he says um he says uh somebody wrote i roll my eyes at people taking that physiognomy stuff seriously, but there is 100% an Anton LaVey physiognomy.
It's just brilliant. It's an absolute genius.
Everyone who looks like this is a close-up magician, sells jewelry at a renaissance fair, or bounces at a sex club.
You will see 20 of these dudes at a D&D convention.
I'm like, whoever you are, Cloud Cage, that's brilliant.
That just plugs right into your analogy and metaphor matrix bottom brain.
That's It's just fantastic.
Have you seen this meme? Man before bath looks homeless, after bath looks fantastic.
Woman before bath looks like a model, after bath looks like, well, quite a bit less. Less a model.

[18:36] This is kind of sad, right? This is kind of sad.
So, there's this fellow who says, let me just see if I can get to the, oh yeah. He says, this is a recent post. He said, I haven't been to a restaurant in four years.
I haven't been to a gym in four years. I haven't been to a friend's house in four years.
And this is a woman. I haven't been to see my family in four years because of the level three airborne biohazard called COVID-19.
People are disabled. People are dying.

[19:10] That's just sad.
It's really awful. uh just how much uh people have been broken you know there's there's people who have do you hit me with the why if you have a susceptibility to um hypochondria like worrying about things or uh what's the old joke like uh oh my ear's itchy i'm gonna look it up on google cancer you know whatever you say in google you're about to die so So, let me just get to your questions or comments here.

The Value of College Degrees and Specific Career Paths

[19:45] Percentage of income would be a great incentive for colleges to weed out less intelligent students and to make sure that they build the relationships.
My father did his PhD, and the company he worked for paid for him to do his PhD, but then he had to work for them for a couple of years afterwards, right?
So, they did the PhD, they gained the first value of it, but yeah.
I would take out the STEM, and yeah, the STEM is absolutely right.
When I have physics, philosophy, like the highest levels of IQ are in those areas, the general, I don't know, I don't even know what to say, right?

[20:19] University is just an extension of school i don't expect degrees to be of any value when my baby children reach the age of 18 i hope they have more interesting lucrative path mapped out, oh i remember gosh way back in the day this is going back to the hinterlands, backstory of the show almost when i got into trouble um some parents got really mad at me because i was saying to the kids hey you know don't go to school unless it's you know my advice is not to go to college unless there's something very specific that you desperately need and want to do, like, you know, engineer, doctor, lawyer, where you just have to have the piece of paper.
The last two jobs I got, there was a fairly complex code test, basically an IQ test, but in both cases, they were watered down or removed.
Yeah, I mean, if you look at the hiring that Google does, I mean, they have very complicated tests and so on.
Steph, what do you think about taking finasteride for hair loss?
My hair is fine, but I've heard about others taking it, and it's pretty normal to start around 18 years of age.
It really is tough to see young men balding, and I don't really blame them for trying to save their hair. It's a pretty sore spot for most men.
I get that. I understand that, and I'm not, um, it's, it's, you know, it's, it's easy for me to, oh, roll my eyes, and oh, it's not that big a deal, but, you know, I remember when I first started to lose my hair, it felt like more of a big deal.
I I was a little bit vain about my looks, I suppose. And so it was more of a big deal.

[21:47] But hair loss, I think, saved my life. Like, I'm alive because of hair loss.
I'm alive because of hair loss.

[21:58] So the reason being, of course, that when I began to lose my hair, I focused even more on exercise.
Because you can be a bald guy, but you can't be a bald fat guy, right?
So because I worked so hard on exercise, I had a very strong base of health when I got hit with cancer.
And that, I mean, according to the doctors and the nurses I talked to, that helped me bounce back pretty quickly from that and so on.
So the fact that I ended up exercising more because I was losing my hair, it ended up saving my life. So who knows?
I mean, if I'd taken some pill to keep my hair, maybe I wouldn't have exercised.
I probably wouldn't have exercised as much.
And then I might have been taken down by cancer.
I just, I've got a show uploaded, though. I haven't published it yet, which is basically like, you don't know. You don't know if it's good or bad.
You don't know if it's good or bad. that hair loss is a reason to get married earlier. That's right.
That's right. So one of the reasons why hair loss in men is a thing is because hair loss has you locked down getting married earlier.
You know, every single time I talk to a guy who's in his 40s and 50s who's still dating around and all of that, and you've heard me say this like at least a dozen times, oh, you still have your hair. Yep, I still have all my hair.
And it's like, okay, well, you can do that. Yeah.

[23:19] Let's see here so with regards to um i don't know i obviously can't give you any medical advice i hate taking stuff i i like i i loathe i loathe taking stuff um i mean i'm fine with supplements fine uh but uh as far as like stuff that just like does freaky stuff i mean isn't there aren't there side effects what's it to rogaine or something aren't there side effects that can be pretty horrendous.

Considerations and Side Effects of Hair Loss Treatments

[23:47] So, here's the other thing too, is that.

[23:53] If, like for most men, like by the time you're in your 60s, like 90 plus percent of men have lost hair, right?
So it's going to happen sooner or later for most people, right? For most people.
But here's the question that I have for you. And it's a question that I wish somebody had asked of me when I was younger. So I'm going to ask you this question.
Do you want to date a woman who won't date you if you're balding?
It's kind of a foundational question. Would you agree? Do you or would you want to date a woman who won't date you if you're balding?
So, in other words, because you're going to go bald, right?
Again, so she's maybe 8-10% of men don't go bald or whatever, right?
Or don't lose hair, significant amounts of hair. So do you want to date a woman who won't date you if you're balding?

[24:59] That's your question, right?
Steph, do you think it would be beneficial for the average person to know their IQ? I think finding out that you're lower than you thought could discourage you.
What was it, Einstein didn't have a super high IQ? I don't know.
I've never, I mean, that's a great question.

[25:22] Of course, you do know your IQ to some degree, right? You know your IQ to some degree. I mean, you can estimate your intelligence based on the complexity of books that you read.
You can estimate your intelligence based on the curiosity in a variety of fields that you have.
You can estimate your intelligence based on the kind of conversations that you enjoy.
Are you okay with an endless drivel diet of small talk rolling past like a cadaver on a conveyor belt of your days?
So now are you rapidly curious are you open to new thoughts uh are you in do you enjoy challenging yourself uh and so on right so there's a lot that you can do to estimate your intelligence just by being honest about yourself and and looking at how you uh live your life so many coding boot camps follow the percent of salary model seems like the way for the future yeah for sure he'll say focus on wisdom no no looks are important i mean looks are important important and i mean of course some of the time that i've spent exercising i mean i'll sometimes listen to books or watch documentaries or whatever sometimes i'll just play katan but a lot of the time i've spent exercising i have not spent improving my wisdom so i'm not but one of the reasons you exercise as well is that women are happier in relationships where the men are more muscular like a man is happier in a relationship where the woman's waist size is smaller and a the woman is and it's proportional it's dose dependent right the more the woman's waist.

The impact of confidence and self-perception on attractiveness

[26:47] The the um the more the woman's waistline goes down the happier the man tends to be and the more muscular the man is the happier the woman tends to be so it's just part of keeping your wife or your girlfriend happy as well so.

[26:59] So I'm fine with, you know, look good and all of that.
But, you know, there is something to be said about confidence.

[27:12] Most people won't judge how you look directly. They will judge how you think you look.
So if you think you're all that and a slice of bread, I mean, I'll be straight up with you guys. I love the way I look.
Look, I was talking to my wife about hair. I was just reading something out about how they found some cure for male pattern baldness. And she's like, don't you dare.
You're perfect. So I love the way I look. I'm not going to change a thing, really.
There's nothing really I want to improve. I'm very happy with my head. I'm happy with my body.
And, you know, my body's carried me through 57 years and survived a whole lot.
So I'm very happy with it. And I hope I do it well. also.
So if you have confidence in how you look, if you enjoy how you look, if you're happy with how you look, you'd be really surprised how much people are programmable by your attitude. It's a wild thing.
It's one of the things I remember learning in my early 20s, that if you're confident, people will just accept it.
That if you think you can, other people will think you can.
I mean, it's just a wild thing. To believe it is to become it.
And I know it's not magical thinking in someone, but most people don't have any objective way of judging you, but they say, say, well, you know yourself a lot better than I know you, so if you think you're not worth much, well, you know yourself way better than I do, I guess I'll accept your opinion of yourself, whereas if you think you're worth everything and all that, then I guess you have value to me. So, yeah.

[28:42] As a bald guy, this is a hill I will die on. It doesn't matter about being bald.
What matters is you project yourself in being bald.
And yes, I keep myself in shape and so forth. Yeah, for sure.
And of course, here's the thing too. Most women have grown up, if they have fathers around, most women have grown up loving someone, an older man who's bald, right?
Or balding, right? That's just the way it is because most men go bald, right?
It seems method and persistence slash practice trumps IQ in terms of success.
Yeah, but of course it takes a higher IQ to see the value of persistence and practice.

[29:20] But he says, but I would lie. Don't lie.
Don't lie. But I would lie if I said I would date a woman who is very short or ugly. I see why women see hair as something that is youthful.
Right. Right. Right. Well, it's a line from the Taylor Swift song.
Well, that guy over there with the hella good hair.
Right. So yeah, having pretty hair. I remember there was a show, I never watched it, called The Mentalist. And there was some woman talking about, there was a great website that used to be around called Television Without Pity.
And then it got taken down for reasons I can't possibly understand.
But they had the most hilarious recaps of television shows. I used to many, like 20 years ago, I used to convert those to audio and listen to them sometimes.
Times they were just so funny the way that they would write uh their comments on uh synopses or recaps of of television shows and they talked about the guy who was in the mentalist having the prettiest hair and women sort of swoon over and i get that you know people who guys who have nice hair it's it's pretty cool right but uh but what but what and do all the guys with good hair end up happy i mean we know that right i mean brad pitt has great hair and i think he's like like he's divorced, and I mean, it's just miserable.
Half his kids don't talk to him, as far as I can tell. Yeah, it's terrible.

[30:35] And here's the other thing, too. Like, if you had great hair, would you ever feel loved, or would you just think that women were chasing you because of the great hair and all of that?
And, of course, women will often take the looks of their boyfriend or husband as a status symbol to other women, right? Just as men do. Men do that, too, right?

[30:53] I tried listening to a call-in show while lifting. not compatible activities.
Let's see here. DJ says, it may sound weird, but thank God I gained weight in my 20s because it cut down my vanity and it humbled me.
I was very attractive and it went to my head. Obviously, there are more downsides with having extra weight.
Well, it's interesting that, it's interesting that, And Socrates said about sexual desire that in his 70s, it kind of left him.
It was like not being possessed by a demon anymore.

[31:35] And, of course, the ancient Greeks were heavily into pederasty, so they did not have the normal restraints around sexuality that is often associated with that kind of fairly monstrous behavior.
But to not care about how you look is one of the big benefits of the 50s, right?
And it's not like I don't care about how I look, but, you know, I mean, I'm not doing another family, you know, I'm not dating anyone other than, you know, hanging out with my wife and all that, so I don't have to worry about that.
David says, how can a guy this eloquent, intelligent, and full of meaning have so few viewers, but the content recyclers are having hordes of listeners?

[32:14] Yeah, did you not just hear the whole IQ thing? I find myself having hunched shoulders and looked down a lot. Ideas on how to improve body language.
So, I don't make a lot of recommendations, but there was stuff that I did many years ago.
Oh gosh, I was in my early 20s, so yeah, this was a long time ago.
I call it the Alexander Technique. The Alexander Technique around sort of how you move, and I remember like most people are kind of hunched, or they sit down twice, like they sit down, and then they kind of slump again.
And so, you want to sort of walk like your head's hanging from a hook and your body's hanging underneath it.
My posture's not great, but it certainly helped a lot. lot. It helped a lot.
So if you would like to be interested in that, I can't give any recommendations for people as a whole, but I found the Alexander Technique to be quite helpful when it came to movement and all of that sort of stuff.

[33:06] Having dropped a lot of weight recently, I feel way better, move way better, and people respond to me more positively. Yes. Yes.

[33:18] The internet 10 years ago was much better than the internet today. I don't get it.
Oh yeah, 2006 to 2016 was the absolute glorious heydays of the internet. It was fantastic.
Absolute free speech, almost absolute free speech. It was amazing.
Or can't we just try our hardest to vet out women? Is it Dunning-Kruger on my part to think I'm doing when, is it Dunning-Kruger on my part to think I'm doing when picking women? I don't know what that means.
So here's the other thing too. Let me ask you this. Let me ask you this.
If you're balding and you take, like, let's say you get hair transplants, right? So if you're balding and you get hair transplants, are you lying?
Are you lying?

The ethics of cosmetic surgery and genetic deception

[34:03] I mean, if a woman has butt surgery or fake boobs or something like that, is she lying?
Because, you know, one reason why a woman might choose you if you've got hair is because she wants kids, she wants sons or whatever who are going to grow up with hair and maybe that helps. So that's sort of the general perception.
I think it comes through the maternal line, but the general perception is, right? I mean, if a woman, there was a story about a guy in China who divorced his wife and sued his wife because it turns out she'd had a lot of plastic surgery.
And so when their kids came out ugly, he got really mad and he confronted her and it turns out that the face that she had wasn't her face.
So in other words, she's pretending she's in possession of genes she's not in possession of.

[34:58] It's tricky right? It's tricky.
If a woman has a lot of plastic surgery, is she lying?
Because of course beauty is beautiful because it mimics good genetics, healthy genetics.
If a woman has liposuction, is she lying?
Is she saying either I never gained weight or my hip-to-waist ratio is natural or I have the strength of will to diet or whatever it is, is she lying?
Are hair transplants lying? Is taking these whatever chemicals or whatever you take to keep your hair growing as a man, are you lying?

[35:42] Now, if you are lying, right, if you are lying, then what are you saying about yourself?

[35:57] What are you saying about yourself? Clearly you're saying I'm not good enough or attractive enough on my own, right?
And of course there's things you can do to make yourself more attractive.
You can get sun, exercise, eat well, take care of your skin.
Like I was just thinking the other day, I can't imagine, like I've got, I think I've got pretty good skin for 57.
I'm not saying I spend a whole lot of time thinking about it, but yeah, morning and night I'm putting on face cream.
My wife got me into these great face washes and so on. And so I want to, you know, it's nice, you know, plus you guys have to look at me.
So I might as well not look like quite like the Crypt Keeper, at least not yet.

[36:33] So there's lots of things that you can do that make you more attractive that are natural, right? That are natural.
And so it's the old thing that if you take steroids, like they did a study where guys went to the gym a lot and guys just sat at home on the couch.
They gave the guys who sat home on the couch steroids, and they gave the guys who went to the gym nothing.
And the guys who sat on the couch gained more muscle than the guys who went to the gym.
So for me to become hugely bulky, if I could even do it, would be like four hours a day in the gym and like relentlessly strict diet, right?
And so if I took, I don't know, whatever it was, to bulk up muscles so that I could do it in one quarter of the time or with one quarter of the effort, I'm lying.
Because I'm saying I look like I have more discipline than I actually have or more focus or more follow through or more consistency or more commitment.
So it's kind of lying, right? If some guy is super bulks because he's taking steroids or something, then he's lying.

[37:40] Because to get that way naturally if it were even possible would be probably three to four times the work so do you want to lie do you want to lie yeah koreans they have plastic surgery like it's insane as much as a woman who's done some kind of plastic surgery in my opinion yes it is lying right by the same token makeup is a widespread lie yes it is yes it is but can we say the same him about high heels and makeup.
Well, I don't think high heels are a lie because you can see them, right?
High heels are not a lie. Now, maybe the men who have lifts in their shoes, they give them an extra inch or two or whatever.

[38:24] Maybe that's a bit of a lie, but I don't think heels are a lie because you can see them.
Makeup is half and half in a way. It is a kind of lie, but you can see it too, right?
I mean, makeup is not something that is invisible.
Whereas, you know, hair transplants, I mean, when I was a kid or when I was younger, they were like these plugs. They were like Ken hair, like Ken doll hair, like really bad.
Now I think it's more natural. I'm actually a good candidate for hair transplants if I wanted it because most of the back of my head is covered with hair.
I don't have that little horseshoe hair.
So um but a good a good hair transplant um it is a kind of lie because it's not obvious whereas makeup is more obvious right nobody looks at that kabuki makeup and thinks that it's exactly how the woman looks so uh what do you do if you can't seem to gain a female attention i've been going to participate in volleyball games signed up for acting classes bible study church frequenter i'm thinking i need to be more assertive but get fearful around much mixed ages of people at sports games.
Like if I bring up parenting to an attractive woman, is an abusive parent going to rage? Or are abused kids going to see me as a ma a week if I'm too tender? What?

[39:32] What? Okay, please read these things back to yourself before you post them because I don't know what that means.
Like if I bring up parenting to an attractive woman, is an abusive parent going to rage? I don't know. Why would you be around the attractive woman and her parents?
I think a hair transplant is even less fake because it's your own hair from a different part of your body.
No, it is fake. It is fake, because everybody knows the male pattern.
Baldness starts up at the peninsula of hair and then goes back from there.

[39:59] If you're not open about that, it's a kind of fraud. Right.

[40:11] Hmm. Let's see here.
I've heard women complain about being hat fished men who are bored showing up with a hat yes hat fish that's pretty good uh air transplant hair transplant equals question I'm as worth worth as much as my hair yeah, Will $5,000 worth of hair transplants really make us more attractive to virtuous women over $5,000 of tips and stuff? Well, I can't answer that. I'm a little biased.
The biggest issue with hair transplants for me would be the knowledge that I'm the guy who had them. Yeah, and you can't undo them, right? What if you change your mind? We're going to put them back, right?
Women love detail. Pluck hair and shave nicely.
Yeah, women, women, women. Women love this. Women, I don't know.
I mean, women are as different as clouds, right?

[41:06] Ah let's see here high t guys statistically have more daughters by the way yeah that's true i mean i have a daughter i'm going to agree yeah high t guys have more daughters because they tend to marry more feminine women right if you take that another step is getting braces for your teeth lying i don't see it that way myself i don't see it that way because crooked teeth are tough to clean and it's a bit of a health hazard and so on so that's a little different i mean nobody nobody has problems health-wise because they're losing their hair right and so getting braces for your teeth is a little bit more like you can't really clean them that well and it's hard to chew and it can get complicated and weird later on in life so i don't think it's quite the same contact lenses are a small lie a little bit but contact lenses are convenient right so a hair transplant gives you hair that you have to manage so it's less convenient whereas contacts are more more convenient.
I went for a walk with my wife the other night and I had a pair of glasses on, and, you know, in Canada, like it was cold, right?
And, well, it is cold. It was cold when we went for the walk the other night.
So I had a muffler on and then my nose was cold. So I put the muffler over my nose, but then my breath all goes into my eyes and then I fog up my glasses and it's kind of annoying, right?
So it's, it's odd. So I can see the convenience of.

[42:28] Of contact lenses, but having, like if I had hair, I'd have to do my hair, right? Or do something with it, right?
Because, well, I guess I could just be Tucker Carlson, I guess, right?
My 26-year-old nephew has a $10,000 hair transplant procedure booked.
He'll be off work for six weeks for recovery. Oh, my God.
Isn't social masking lying, suppressing your temper, or the fact you pick your nose? Hey, what did you see?
Well, I mean, self-control is not lying.

Crooked Teeth: Modern Diets vs Genetics

[43:08] Crooked teeth are likely a result of modern diets anyway, Not really I mean, maybe, maybe But I don't know that that's true I don't know that that's true, please talk about the flood of illegals. I mean, I wouldn't have anything new to add to that topic.
You can't control mass immigration in any way, shape, or form if you're not willing to give up the welfare state, and people aren't willing to give up the welfare state, so they'll just have to learn some other way around.
It's important to know men should ask if the woman has had surgery.
The progression of the balding, of course, doesn't stop after the transplant, so you can look up some funky hair formations online of these transplants years after. Yeah, that's right.
Should you be open and upfront about mental illness within a pretty short time if you're dating romantically? People tend to judge harshly on things like this that we can't wheel away.
Well, I don't know. I don't know what your definition of mental illness is, or how it manifests, or what it is, right? So I don't I don't really know how to answer that.

[44:21] Crooked teeth are largely a childhood dietary issue, less so a genetics issue.
No, I don't think that's true. I mean, again, I don't know for sure, but I don't think that's true.
I think what can happen, of course, is that as you sort of mix and match the genetics from a man and a woman, I think what happens is if you get big teeth and a small jaw, right, from like, let's say the woman has a small jaw, the man has big teeth or vice versa, So you mix the big teeth with the small jaw, there's just crowding.
I don't know that it's a big dietary issue.
I mean, misaligned teeth are a more modern phenomenon.
Teeth problems are the least in the modern world than they've ever been in history.
Use contact lenses for sports. Way safer than glasses. Yes, that's true.
What do you think about wisdom teeth removal? I still have all of mine.
What am I, a dentist? I don't know. I mean, I still have all of mine.
Just clean your teeth as much as possible and hope for the best.
I have not missed that comment. I've got it copied. I just want to make sure that...

[45:24] You can save money on hair transplants by using a beanie like Tim Pool.
I mean, I like Tim in a way. I find his tweets kind of random and a bit odd.
But he's still doing... How old is Tim Pool anyway?
Late 30s? 40s? Early 40s?
Something like that. Mid 30s?
And didn't he post a video not too long ago about skateboarding?
And it's just like, bro, settle down, have some kids. You know, what are you... Skateboarding?
What are you doing? Just seems kind of odd to me. I could be wrong.
I just see skateboarding as like a teen thing. Anyway. Why do people in the UK have bad teeth? Is it the tea and sweets?
I don't know, but I would assume it has a lot to do with the fact that there's a government dentistry, right? The government runs the dentistry.
Doesn't a lie have to be something that you say? Is there such a thing as a lie by omission? Yeah, for sure. Absolutely. Absolutely.
I mean, you can murder through a lie by omission, right? Right.
You your wife goes to the hospital.
She's deadly allergic to, I don't know, penicillin or something.
And they need to inject her and they say.

[46:39] Is she allergic to penicillin? You don't. Right. No, whatever.
I guess it's more of a lie by commission. But, yeah, you can you can lie by omission. Absolutely.
Yeah, there's a lie by omission. If there's something like, if you're selling a car and you know there's a problem, right, and you don't tell the person and it's not an obvious problem, right, you can lie by omission, you can do all of these kinds of things for sure.
Sweets don't help, but crooked teeth are mostly from bad oral posture and lack of hard, chewy, tough foods in the diet.
I don't know, just find, I mean, I could be wrong, just kind of annoying to me.
Because what if you have big teeth and a small jaw? I mean, people vary in size and, right?

[47:24] Did you see Madonna needing a sidebar to help her keep dancing?
She's not exactly aging gracefully now, is she? Because didn't she have, like, she passed out, and she's had big problems with preparing for her tour, right? Yeah.
Is Canada overly backed up too medically? Here dentists are overbooked by the thousands on wait lists, and it's hard to find therapists in person offering appointments.
Yes, for sure, for sure.
Yeah, I was chatting to a guy, with a guy not too long ago, and he was like, I love the Canadian healthcare system.
And, you know, I was out with my wife, we were having a nice evening, and so I was partly thinking, that's left saying, oh, so you're really into coercion as your solution to social problems.
But I just, instead I just said, oh, I mean, have you ever had to, I mean, have you ever had to wait?
For specialists or for procedures or anything like that. It's like, no, no, no, knock on wood, everything's been great.
It's like, okay, well, so you, you know, you think that it's good because it works for you because you don't really need it, right?

[48:26] Balding happens when skin is pulled tightly over your scalp.
You can cure baldness by certain massages. You'll never see a bald guy with loose skin on his head.
What the hell are you talking about? That's absolutely, completely, and totally false. I mean, I'm sure there's some, you know, blood flow and stuff like that, but oh my god.
That's funny. That's very funny. Skin is pulled tightly over your scalp.
You can cure baldness by certain massages.
It's genetic. They can see the genetics. Oh my god.
I can change your genes with a massage. Really? Impressive.
How do you get the confidence to cold approach a woman? A woman was making a lot of eye contact with me the other day and missed an opportunity.
So, the reason that you have trouble approaching women is because the stakes are too high.
You know, this is whether I'm attractive or not, this is whether I'm going to get married or not, this is whether I'm going to find the woman of my dreams or not, this is whether I'm worth anything on the dating market or not, right?
You're just seeing if you like her. That's all.

[49:34] You're just seeing if you like her.
Hey, how you doing? How's your day? Whatever. You're seeing if she's awkward or weird or doesn't respond. It's like, okay, I don't really like that kind of person.
You could say it's a little rude or whatever it is because it's okay to chat with people in public. I do it all the time.
But you're just seeing if you like her. It's not a big test of how attractive you are or whether you're worth anything or whether you'll ever get married or whether you'll ever find true love.
It you're just going up you're just saying hi and you're seeing if you like her you're seeing if, she's a nice person you're seeing if she's friendly you're seeing if she's positive you're seeing if she can hold a conversation you you're trying to figure out you know if it's like hey what did you do well uh for the last two weeks i've been watching a um a kardashian-a-thon i've been doing nothing but kim kardashian 24 7 it's like hey man you know best of luck with your life but not really going to be my kind of thing, right?
You can lie through your actions too by acting like something is important to you when they are around and then not caring about it when they are gone.
Yeah, faking interest. Although sometimes faking interest can become real interest, but yeah, for sure.
Well, yeah, there are the occasional cases where it's just genetics, but quite a few cases of crooked teeth can be prevented with giving children tough foods like raw carrots or beef jerky.

[51:00] How does how does chewing things uncrowd your teeth, I mean there's only so much space right I don't know it's funny.

Lingering feelings for childhood friend getting engaged

[51:24] I talked heavily with my waitress out in san diego wish i got her number but i live in minnesota it was good practice if you like her enough you just move i mean i don't know just like her enough you just move all right yeah somebody wrote thank you for your tip and tips more than welcome of course hi steph a childhood friend of mine is getting engaged tonight we're both in college i had lingering feelings for her pre-philosophy days but she's been in a relationship with a mutual friend for years despite this the news has left me feeling fairly heartbroken we haven't maintained contact, during college and now I'm trying to distance myself emotionally and move on, any advice for navigating this situation would be greatly appreciated thanks so much don't understand this, we haven't maintained contact during college okay so you're telling me about two people one is a childhood friend, oh sorry no I apologize I could be completely wrong here my apologies alright hi Steph a childhood friend of mine is getting engaged tonight night we're both in college oh so it's a friend of yours who's female it's not a friend of yours who's male and he's getting engaged to a woman that you had lingering feelings for okay so this is a childhood friend i had lingering feelings for her pre-philosophy days but she's been in relationship with a mutual friend for years okay i'm sorry i thought you were talking about two people i'm wrong i apologize thank you okay so you had lingering feelings for her pre-philosophy days.

[52:49] It actually increases the size of your jaw when you chew tough things.
Yeah, I'm going to need, I mean, you know, lots of audience wisdom has surprised me over the years.
So if you can throw me a couple of studies, I would be fascinated.
Yeah, throw me a couple of studies.
I'm not saying you're wrong, just because I've never heard of it and doesn't mean I'm wrong. All right. Right.

[53:18] So if you can just hit me with a why, if you could hit me with a why, that this is the same person, right?
Childhood friend is getting engaged, we're both in college, so this is, yeah, so it's not the man, it's the girl, right? Okay.
Fairly heartbroken, we haven't maintained contact during college, now I'm trying to distance myself emotionally and move on.
So you were attracted to her lingering feelings so you were attracted to her for a long time were you attracted to her were you attracted to her when, you when she was single were you ever attracted to her when she was single that's what i'd like to know yes same person female okay nathan thanks i appreciate that Sorry for snorting at you in the complete wrong one, right?
So, were you attracted to her? Because you say you've had lingering feelings with her, but she's been in a relationship with a mutual friend for years, right?

[54:20] So, yeah, guys, if you could hold off on the means, just I'm trying to have a conversation with Nathan here for just a sec, if you could.
So, just a yes. You don't have to give me a lot. Did you ever, yes or no, were you attracted to her when she was single?
Yes, but we were young, met in middle school.
Okay, I'm not talking when she was 12, I get that. Were you attracted to her when she was of dating age, 15, 16, 17, when she was of dating age?
When she was of dating age, were you attracted to her when she was single?
Thanks, Dread Pirate, I got the video. I would check it out.
But is this a study or is this just some guy? Again, I'd just like to see a study, that's all.
Yes, okay. So why didn't you make your move? Why didn't you, if you were attracted to her and you've known her for a long time, that's a pretty good combo.
So if you were attracted to her and you've known her for a long time, and I'm not like, why didn't you, I'm just curious, why didn't you take your shot?

The Danger of Keeping Someone in the Maybe Column

[55:46] Because the question is what are you sad about right i might have a theory but i don't want to um i don't want to spring the theory without getting the facts, it. Sorry, some lovely dead air here. Dead air here.
It's great. Actually, it's built into Windows two.
Steph is one itis and almost impossible to get over. No one itis is cultivated.
I was afraid, like you said, I perceived the stakes as too high.

[56:34] Okay, so you chose not to approach her, right? Okay, that's what I would guess, right?
So you chose not to approach her, and yet you are floating around with the maybe, right?
So you've kept her around as a, it's like chewing gum when you're hungry, right?

[56:56] It's like chewing gum when you're hungry. It feels like you're eating, but you're not, right? right?
So you kept her around as a maybe, but now that she's getting engaged, that maybe has gone and all of the sadness you felt about not making her yours, you are now feeling because she's getting married.
So you had her in the maybe column, maybe they'll break up, maybe this, maybe that, and that's a desperately bad idea.
That's a desperately bad idea. If you have someone around that you're attracted to and they're single or whatever right then um make your like state your claim right make make your case um declare yourself i'm interested in you right, and if she says yes great give it a shot if she says no um then you have to cut her out of your heart like it's a no it's a no don't put people on deck don't have them floating around because Because what happens, that's part of the same fear.
Because what you do is you then hang around these people with the maybe, maybe, maybe.
And that prevents you from shooting your shot with someone else.

[58:06] It puts you in a decaying orbit to nowhere.
If you're attracted to someone, nothing's worse than wasting time.
Nothing is worse than wasting time. If you're attracted to a woman, declare yourself, declare your interest. if she says maybe, you know, maybe give her a little bit of time, but not much.
But if she says no, done. You've got to move on. You've got to cut.
You've got to separate. Once you're attracted to a woman, once you declare yourself, you've got to move on.
If she doesn't want you, right, you've got to move on. You have to.
You must, you must, you must move on.

[58:51] So you had this woman around as a maybe, and that maybe prevented you from pursuing someone else.
You know, it's like if you go for a job interview and they say you're not hired, you don't just hang around in the lobby for the next five years, do you?
What does oneitis, what does oneitis is cultivating mean? Sounds interesting.
Okay, we can do that, but that is a rant. That is a very, very hard and bitterly won rant, so I don't know, man.
It might be too much. It might be too much for everyone, including me.
It just might be too much, and I have concerns.

[59:33] Yes, if a woman says no, I move on. Found a great woman afterwards. Arr!
We've got our dread pirate here. Do we want to rant about one-itis?
Thank you, Steph. This is a learning opportunity.
For the future, I understand my mistake. Regretted even at this point, I'm trying to forget about her.
What do you mean, try to forget about her?

Move on and Find Someone Else

[1:00:03] Ah, all right, I'll give you this rant. I'll give you two rants.
You can't try and forget about people. You've got to just find somebody else.
Well, oh, I've got this woman around. Maybe she'll date me at some point, so I don't need to go find anybody new.
Oh, well, this woman's getting married. I'm feeling really sad, so now I'm trying to forget her, so I can't try and find someone new.
Who for God's sakes, just go and ask someone out.
Just go and ask someone out.
She's not married yet. No, but Michael, she won't want him, because if he's been floating around her for years wanting her and hasn't declared himself, she won't want him.
Women don't want guys who don't declare themselves. And they may not want guys who do declare themselves, but they sure as shit won't want guys who don't declare themselves.
All right, hang on, let me just close the door here.

[1:00:58] One more thing I need to do.
Yes, this is how serious one-itis is. We're going to hell.
We're going to hell itself.
This is going to be tip-worthy. Get ready.
Get ready.
Are you ready? I might do this in Liam Neeson voice. I will find you. And I will kill you.
Hit me with a Y. I need you. Okay, close your video games. Close your other browsers.
I need your concentration, please.
It's gonna be worth it.
Are you ready?

[1:02:03] I think you might be So I will go forward Alright Closed door No glasses Red background, So how do you cultivate one-itis?
You fucking daydream You daydream and you daydream and, oh, she's perfect, oh, she couldn't be better, oh, if I have her, everything will be wonderful.
And what you do is you raise the stakes to the point where she's so elevated, you're not a suitor, you're an acolyte, you're a kneeler before an infinite God.
You put her on a pedestal so you can touch yourself while you look up her skirt.
You elevate her to intangible Beatrice-style platonic perfection, and then you paralyze yourself.
You paralyze yourself because she becomes so perfect the stakes are so high you can't do a goddamn thing.

[1:03:05] I'm not going skating unless I can win gold at the Olympics.
Oh, look at that. I guess there's no real motivation for me to go skating because I go skating. I'm not going to win the gold at the Olympics.
Nothing I can do. Nothing I can do.

Curing One-itis by Asking Out and Having Self-Respect

[1:03:20] Oneitis is cultivated.
You cure oneitis by asking the girl out and having some goddamn self-respect.
Now if you're a good man and she's a good woman, she'll like you again assuming some vague compatibility some singleness like there's no particular barrier between you and the object of your heart mind gut and loins desire so if she is a good woman and you are a good man she'll be interested guaranteed love is our involuntary response to virtue virtue, if we're virtuous.
If you're a good man and she's a good woman, ask her out. She'll be interested.
Doesn't mean you get married that night. Might take a couple of nights, but she'll be interested.
Now, let's say the woman you perceive to be virtuous, to match your virtue, let's say she rejects you.
Tasty wrinkle. Tasty little dip, right?
You're as virtuous as you you can be, you've chosen her primarily for her virtue, she may have other charms, of course, but you've chosen her for her virtue, you're virtuous too, you ask her out, and she says no.

[1:04:40] Why would she say no? Why would she say no?
Philosophically speaking, the answer is simple, because one of you ain't as good as you think you are.
That's it. That's it. One of you ain't as good, virtuous, ain't as good as you think you are.

[1:04:59] One Ida says, she's the best, she's the greatest, she's the top.
So you ask her out.
If she says no, either you're not as virtuous as you think you are, or she's not as virtuous as you think she is.
It's the only two possibilities all other things being equal like level of attraction and singleness or whatever right I mean vague attraction like so.

[1:05:42] If you have a virtue of 10, and she has a virtue of 3, then the only reason you're attracted to her is for her body.
In terms of, like, one-itis, right? Because one-itis is love and worship and adoration, right?
So if you've got a virtue of 10, she's got a virtue of 3, you've got a 7-digit span that's filled by cleavage.
An ass, or hair, or whatever is going on for you, right? Legs.
She's got a great pair of getaway sticks so you're backfilling seven levels of virtue with tits and ass which is a pathetic thing to do and instantly reduces your virtue to what?
Less than three.

[1:06:31] Less than three, because she's not lying so if you manufacture all of these quote virtues in her because you're just physically lusting after her even though she's not a very quality person then you're a liar you're lying to yourself and you instantly don't have virtue of 10, so why is she rejecting you?
Because you're a liar and listen I'm not I've done it everyone's done it every man's done it you're a liar oh you know I just think you're so special cleavage cleavage legs legs butt butt But the great moral equivocator.
But with two Ts.

[1:07:19] She's just perfect. Okay, so if she's perfect, then she's going to match you if you're perfect.
Now, let's say she has morals of 10 and you have morals of 5.
Why would she say yes to you? and you're pouring all of your desire for improvement into getting her rather than getting better yourself, rather than being a better, more moral person yourself.
Be more direct, more courageous, more honest, more ferocious in your pursuit of virtue, more stand up in your exhortations to the good, having higher levels of integrity and honesty and courage, right?
So, you may look up and worship her, but if you're looking up at her and worshipping her why would she choose you?
If she's great she wants an equal. She doesn't want an acolyte.
She doesn't want somebody who's doing that little doggy paw begging please, please, please, please.
No, thank you.
If you're aiming up in the moral hierarchy you're asking her to lower her standards and if she is willing to lower her standards, she ain't that virtuous.
If you're looking down at the moral hierarchy, you're a ten, she's a three, you're automatically lower than her.

[1:08:47] Because you're lying. You're lying to yourself because you're saying, well, I'm attracted to her qualities of character.
And if her qualities of character have to be backfilled into a giant bra by a bunch of sales assistants, then maybe that's what you're looking for.
Not her actual spirit, her soul, her virtue, her being.
I mean, I remember.
I won't give you all the circumstances because it doesn't really matter.
But I remember having a long walk with a woman who was just so pretty. So pretty.
And I was like, please, Zeus above.

[1:09:27] Don't be dumb. And I, you know, I wasn't putting on full brain pyrotechnics, but you know, asking questions and making a couple of jokes and so on.
It was like dropping pennies down a well that went on forever.
And, And it was a real shame. It's like, man, I mean, I'm not saying you've got to be Ayn Rand, but can you please not be a potato sack?
Would that be something? Like something, anything, anything to work with.
Give me something I could lie to myself about. A couple of pithy statements, one thing, one, right?
I remember asking a girl out once because she made a joke when we were with a group of people.
She's like, well, everyone hold on to the rope, you know, like we were in kindergarten.
I thought that was a funny joke. joke so we went out but anyway didn't go far just anything but i couldn't i couldn't get there i just i couldn't get there i couldn't get there.

[1:10:31] If you're a good person and she's a good person you will go on a date, because that's rare if you're not a good person and she's a good person asking her to lower herself to you is lazy and repulsive well i'm not going to be a really good person but maybe i could just get you to lower your standards and hang around with my trashy ass for a while. Nope.
Because you can't get her then. Because if you think she's great, but she's willing to lower herself to your trashy ass standards, she's not great.
In which case, you won't be able to continue to lie to yourself very well that she's great, and that's going to crumble the one-itis.
Or she's going to say no to you, in which case, she's still great, and you can't pull her down to your trashy ass level.
So, you can't get her anyway.
Work relentlessly on the quality you bring to a relationship. What do you bring?
What do you bring? If you don't have confidence, and you guys tell me, tell me, tell me, what do you bring to a relationship? What do you bring?

[1:11:44] I'm not challenging you like you don't bring anything. thing of course you do but you have to know what you bring what do you bring i bring need i bring penis i bring oh could you please put a giant salve on my gaping sucking chest wound of loneliness i bring sorrow i bring tragedy i bring instability i bring what do you bring, what do you bring if you know you bring quality things to a relationship.

[1:12:16] Then you can ask for quality things. Everything else is bribery, extortion, or fraud.
What do you bring? Security and stability.
Everything, not an answer. Many podcasts of wisdom, not an answer.
You've heard so many people who've listened to this show who are still messed up. What do you bring?

The Importance of Knowing Your Value in Dating

[1:12:41] Why should a woman choose you? Why should she choose me?
If you don't have an answer for that question, everything you do in the dating arena is a fraud.
Esoteric knowledge about the web-based political landscape between 2015 and 2018.
Well, if she's an editor for an obscure political magazine, maybe she's the one for you. Courage.
What kind of courage? Physical courage? You're willing to go, uh, you fry bacon in the nude?
Value and virtue?
What do you bring?
What do you bring? If you know what you bring to the table, everybody who doesn't accept your value, if you have value and you know you have value, then everybody who doesn't accept your value is a fool.
Do you follow? Do you follow? if you have value and you know you have value, then everybody who doesn't see your value is a fool.
I'll give you an example. I'll give you two examples. Number one, you walk into a Maserati dealership and you say, I've got $14 and I want a car.

[1:14:07] You're an idiot. Like you don't understand the situation. You don't understand the circumstances because you don't understand that the value you're bringing to the table is nothing close to the value that the Maserati is bringing to the table.
If you go up to a movie star, you go up to Tom Cruise and you say, well, I've got a little independent movie.
I'd really like you to star in it.
I got $80.
What's time is time it's just like that what do you even say what do you even say, if you're a world-renowned heart surgeon you go to some hospital they want to hire you and you say well i'd be really thrilled with two bucks above minimum wage to be like they'd be like what, what do you not have any sense of your own value this is often why of course artists have agents to negotiate for them because the agents understand the marketplace.

[1:15:13] Do you know what you're worth and what you bring?
I mean, you know, that's why I ask for donations looking you straight in the eye because I know the value that I'm bringing.
I absolutely, deeply, and vividly know the value that I'm bringing.
I know you can't get it anywhere else. I know you get it in as concise, believe it or not, entertaining, concentrated, and motivating a fashion as possible here and nowhere else.
It's just the way things are. It's the way things are. So, yeah, of course I'm going to ask for donations. I'm absolutely, completely, and totally aware of the value that I bring.
Completely, totally. I mean, I think I bring more value than people see.
But, you know, eventually it comes down to the value that you perceive.
Dave says, I don't know what I'm worth to women.

[1:16:03] If you don't view a woman as damn lucky to get you, I don't know what you're doing. Then you need to get to that place.
You need to get to that place where the woman is damn lucky you asked her.

[1:16:20] Because you're great. Maybe you're, obviously the morals, the ethics, the virtue and so on, but maybe you're funny.
Maybe you roll with things. Maybe you, you know, we had the, my wife and I went away not too long ago for a night, and she said to me, oh, I've got your computer back.
So we're halfway to our destination, I turn around, and I'm like, wait, where's the computer back? She says, no, I put it in the hall.
And I'm like, but you packed, like, three other bags.
Why didn't you you said i've got it and she's like yeah i got it in the anyway so some people would get mad at that and obviously i was i wasn't tempted to get mad but it was like oh i kind of need the computer if you know this that the other happens right but then i'm like does it matter i'm one day without a computer oh no i'm one day without a computer so it's just kind of funny and it didn't matter so you just you just roll with things like you you know i remember when i I went to go and give a speech in Brazil.
My luggage was lost for three days.

[1:17:26] Getting a little gamey in this plane clothes. Plane clothes doesn't mean you just keep wearing the clothes from the plane, I don't think.
So do you just roll with things? When you've got to untangle the Christmas lights, do you just make it a fun game? Do you just roll with it?
Do you help her if she gets too stressed? Do you help put things in perspective?
Are you good-natured, good-humored, fun to be around?
Are you a good father or have the potential to be a good father?
Are you a decent provider? Are you somebody who budgets responsibly, who's not wedded to overspend? Like, are you just great to be with?

[1:18:03] Now, if there's things you can improve, do you improve them?
Lord knows there's things that I could still improve.
I can be a bit hot-tempered from time to time. I know it's a shock. I know it's a shock.
I know it's a shock. But I can be a little hot-tempered from time to time.
I blame my Irishness. It's the only domino that I accept.
Because my hot-temperedness is at war, half Irish, with the icy coldness of my German side. So fire and ice, kaboom, right?
I get steamed. Oh, there's a little physics joke for you. Not much, but just a little bit.
So go with the flow, yeah, for sure. I mean, go with the flow unless there's any moral issues involved, in which case, plant your roots fucking deep and stand like a tower.

[1:18:54] Is she lucky that you asked her out?

The Value Proposition: Becoming Irresistible in Relationships

[1:19:01] I mean, I had this my whole life from when I was my mid-teens or whatever, right? I'd be like, well, you could date someone else, but why?
But why? Why would you date anyone else? Everybody else would be a total settle.
Now, I had girls who would go out with me, women who would go out with me, but I couldn't get anyone to commit to me in the way that I felt I was worthy of or deserved until I met my wife.
And then we committed to each other because I think, obviously, I think we're both extraordinarily high-quality people, and we've worked hard at that and we also work to continue to improve and so on, right?

[1:19:40] So to me, if a girl didn't see my value, she went down in my estimation.

[1:19:51] Do you see what I'm saying? Like, if you don't see my value, this is why I don't get mad at people.
Like, okay, you could listen to other shows. You could listen to other people talk. But why?
Why would you? Oh, the Epstein thing. Oh, the January thing.
Oh, the politics thing. Oh, the economics thing. Okay. cave.
I've done that. I've done that road and what does it do? What does it do?
How does it make your life better?
Oh, look, I wasted a huge amount of time throwing my heart against a wall that simply won't change.
And I didn't mind it while I did it. I enjoyed it while I did it, but, the Epstein list has been dropped. Something's gonna happen any day now.
Epstein shit's been going on for almost 20 years. I was covering it, what, 10 years ago? More? I don't know.
So yeah you i mean people could listen to i mean yeah you could go you could you could listen to other shows and i guess a lot of people do but like why why nothing better than this tell me tell me what's better than this you tell me what's better than this i'll do it and make it better you tell me what's better than this what's more important than this i'll do it and make it better, because i think about what can i do what can i improve what can i do better what can i do deeper what can i do more powerfully So.

[1:21:11] If you are not in a place where a woman is damn lucky you're asking her or showing any interest in her, if you're not in that place, get to that place.
And it ain't just about looks, and it ain't about brains, and it ain't about money.
You keep doing value adds until your proposition is irresistible to anyone with half a brain.
You keep adding value to what you do read the Kama Sutra I don't care whatever you have to do, whatever you have to do to add value until your value proposition is irresistible to yourself, to the point where you can say well she's not interested in me and I know this it's been her loss but that's sort of a petty ego based thing right, there are people people currently in the world not listening to this show i mean it's crazy it's deranged but there literally are people you could probably count them on the fingers of more than two hands, there are literally people in this world who don't listen to what we talk about here, i mean clearly there are people in the world, who are not even watching it live. Not even not watching it live.
They may not even listen to it later.

[1:22:39] I don't get it. I don't understand it. Fundamentally, it's completely bizarre to me.
But I tend to be an all-in kind of guy. You know, when I get into a band, I listen to that band.
When I get into a writer, I read everything they ever wrote, including their shopping lists.

[1:22:57] Keep adding value to yourself to the point where you are irresistible to yourself.

The Story of the Glenn Miller Orchestra

[1:23:11] I suppose it's the Glenn Miller Orchestra. I told this story to my daughter years ago. The Glenn Miller Orchestra.
They're in Minnesota or some cold-ass place. It's snowing like crazy.
Their train breaks down. They've got to make it to a gig.
They've got their tubas and shit, and they're slogging their way through, like, thigh-deep snow, and it's wet, and they're in their formal clothes, and their shoes are getting all soggy and crappy, and they're freezing their asses off, and they go past a farmhouse, and they see people in there, laughing, eating pie, big roaring fire cider and one of them turns to the other Glenn Miller Orchestra one of them turns to the other and says my god, how can people live like that and then they go slogging on their way through the snow how can people live like that.

[1:24:00] If you didn't believe that you had the value to offer this girl who's getting married you're right, I mean, guys, men, women, brothers and sisters, we are of such intellectual caliber that if we think we can or we think we can't, we're absolutely right.
If I thought I couldn't do this show, I'd be absolutely right.
If I think I can do this show, I'm absolutely right.
You're like Maria Carey. I don't think I can hit that note. okay then you don't hit the note but you could if you think you can hit the road she can do that tea kettle stuff sure.

[1:24:49] Oh my gosh, keep adding to your value until your value proposition is irresistible to yourself, and then find someone who agrees with the empirical grandeur of your own wonderfulness.

[1:25:14] And recognize and understand that the higher quality you are, the fewer people will see it, particularly when it comes to morals.
You know, we can all recognize, you know, a great singer when we hear it. Most people can.
But in terms of moral quality, in terms of genuine deep relationship quality and parental qualities and so on, the higher quality you are, the fewer people will see it. It's this weird paradox.
You just, this is why you need will. This is why you You need philosophy.
This is why you need objectivity.
Because the feedback you get when you're of high quality is going to be incomprehensibly enraged.
You know, somebody asked me the other day, what do you wish you'd known when you were 20?
You hear these kinds of things. And it's, you know, it's not the end of the world as far as an exercise goes or whatever, right?
But what would have made my life easier when I was 20 was to recognize that almost all major social institutions particularly the arts were utterly compromised by hardcore leftists who only aimed to pursue the revolution at all costs.

[1:26:21] This is why I'm a good fiction writer I'm a good actor I'm a good, playwright good poet and then every time I would submit my work I would get this incomprehensible incomprehensible rage like just incomprehensible rage people just get enraged at me, i'm like what this is an odd i didn't get it i didn't get it i had no more chance of getting published than a snowball's chance in hell because i'm an anti-communist so but of course if i'd had to swallow that heavily black pill oh the major social institutions all corrupted by hard leftists i don't know man it would have been kind of a lot of despair to take on at a tender underage.
It's a little bit better, you know, post-internet to get that, right?

The Importance of Self-Confidence and Personal Growth

[1:27:10] If you don't think you're worth that much, how many fucking people in the world do you think are going to bend their asses to a blackened state of afterburner to change your mind?
Well, I'm not really worth that much. I don't really have that much to offer.
Okay, the world is going to be fine. You know, fine.
I got my own shit to deal with. I got my own insecurities. Like, if you think you're not worth that much, how many people in your life do you think are going to circle back? No, no, dude, you really, you gotta, here's the evidence, here's this.
How many people, how many times has this happened to you in your life?
When you express deep insecurities that people have actually helped you and poured lots of time and effort and energy into helping you overcome your insecurities, what happens as an adult if you say, I'm not worth that much?
People are like, okay, who am I to disagree?
I don't know you that well, or I can't fix you. I got my own shit to deal with. I got bills.
I got, you know, my kid needs the dentistry. How many people circle back and fix the earth? Nobody has any time.
Nobody has any time.

[1:28:21] Oh, she's going to say no. Oh, it's not going to work. Oh, she's not.
People would just accept that that's, yeah. Never. People have always been like, good, less competition then.
Oh, particularly men. Oh, you're insecure? Yeah, absolutely.
You should be. Yeah, hang back, man. I'll get the girls.

[1:28:44] I mean, the world is like, you've got 10 guys, 10 people in the room with you, all trying to get the job of their dreams, and there's one job.
You've got 10 guys, all in the same room with you. They all want the job. job.
It's the job of your dreams for everyone. Everyone wants that job.
Now, if some guy says, I don't know, man, I don't think I'm right for this job. I don't think I should.
Okay, boom, one down, nine to go.
No, one, eight to go. You got 10, eight to go.
Oh, man, you got a pimple. They never hire anyone with a pimple.
You're going to mess with their heads. You're going to exacerbate their insecurities.
Come on, we're men. This is what we do.
This is why men trash talk each other all the time. You're trying to exacerbate other people's insecurities so that they don't compete with you.
So if you're waiting for someone to circle back and pump you up and get you going and make you valuable and tell you everything's going to work out, everything's going to be great, you're waiting forever.
Because you're waiting for the cruise line and you fell off or jumped off or pushed off, you're waiting for it to circle back and it's hitting the gas and getting further away.
Oh, it'll be back here any moment. You're like the guy at the end of that airplane movie, right? In the cab, right?

[1:30:07] That's the best analogy for life I've ever actually heard.
Remember all these people who used to be on my show, used to come on my show on a regular basis?
And then there was a big smoking crater where my show used to be, and they're like, I'm not going to say anything. More audience for me.
I'm not saying it's the most honorable thing in the world, but it's a fact. It's a fact.

[1:30:41] No one's coming back. No one's circling back.
If your parents broke your confidence, nobody's coming to fix it. Nobody.
That's your job. And I'm sorry that you have that job. I really am.
I'm really sorry. But you can be even stronger because you fix it yourself.
You learn a lot more about a car you fix yourself than a car you just drop off at the shop, right?
No one is coming to tell you you're good enough. No one's coming to build up your confidence. Nobody's coming to fix you.
Nobody's circling back to pick up the pieces and put you back together.
We're all running forward.
And you would do the same in anybody else's shoes. And that's why we're the alpha predators. That's why we're the top of the food chain.

[1:31:35] I parent myself, I have to. You cannot. You cannot parent yourself.
You can't parent yourself.
You can't tell yourself you're good enough and believe it. You have to have evidence.
Right? If you want to lose weight, James, you want to lose weight, you just sit there and say, well, I guess I look thinner. or do you buy a slimming mirror? Do you buy slimming clothing?
No. Oh, I look great today. I look thinner. I look this. No.
What do you do? Get on the fucking scale. Stop eating. Exercise more. That's what you do.
Well, I'm going to parent myself and tell myself I look great even when I don't.
You can't parent yourself because you ain't a child anymore.
More yeah just james is right you you fucking stop eating and your body eats itself yep absolutely you become your own buffet today is a steady diet of muffin topping ass.

[1:32:51] Give your penance to the temple of iron that's right you can't parent yourself because you're not a child anymore.

The Importance of Encouragement in Childhood

[1:33:09] You can't breastfeed yourself. You think you're going to be happy as a 25-year-old man by getting adult diapers and changing them yourself and pretending to regress and have a good mommy?

[1:33:28] Childhood is the time for encouragement adulthood is the time for empiricism and nothing else, childhood is yeah so it's great it's a really nice picture yay good good absolutely childhood is the time for encouragement, and you become a man you become a woman when you no longer want encouragement you want facts Facts.
You want facts. Because if people only encourage you, they're treating you as a toddler, and you'll never believe them anyway.
It's just a short-term drug. It's cocaine, it's heroin, it fucks you up.
Can't parent yourself any more than you can give birth to yourself.
You can mourn that you weren't parented, and you can begin the arduous and challenging process of having value despite a shitty beginning, of having value.
And you can learn a lot from that lack of value of your shitty beginning so that you can add real, potent, deep, powerful value to the world and to yourself and to a potential husband or wife and to your future kids.
Just relentlessly add value.
Because even your inner child is empirical after the age of four, and a child is empirical.

[1:34:57] If you have insecurities, okay, fine, we have insecurities, who cares?
Boring. Everybody has insecurities, they're incredibly boring.
Who cares? Oh, I'm so sensitive, I'm so... I get that, we all have that.
Who cares? Unimportant, boring.
If you have insecurities, deal with them or drop them. That's it.
Oh, I'm losing my hair. Okay, am I going to get hair transplant?
No, am I going to take Rogaine?
No, am I going to take whatever other mouthful of syllables that was?
No. So I drop it.
Deal with it or drop it. It's all there is to do with insecurities.
You don't circle them like a drain.
They'll take you down to nothing, to nothing. What's the point?

Adding Value and Accepting Empiricism

[1:35:54] What's the point? You keep adding value until you accept the empiricism of what you've done.
You keep adding value until you accept the empiricism of what you've done.
Now, there are some people who keep adding value and never accept the empiricism of what they've done. Also boring.
There are some people who pretend to have value you when they don't have the empiricism.
Vainglorious, megalomaniacal, narcissistic, also boring.

Embracing Virtue and Disliking the Good Person

[1:36:38] There is no substitute for value. There is no substitute for virtue.
You become a good person, most people will dislike you, a few incredibly self-involved people won't care, and a few people will follow you off the fucking end of the world if they have to.
Right? Say this again. You become a really good person, most people will dislike you because you're raising their faces from the muck and mire of the mammal shit that we all get the state and the educational system just grinds our necks down into this, awful, this refuse, this shit.

[1:37:25] And then people love it down there and they don't want to leave trash planet and you're up there flying soaring dancing on the very star stuff of the universe.
And people are like, well, it didn't taste like shit till I saw something up there. I didn't feel short till I saw this guy. I didn't feel ugly till I saw this beautiful soul.
I didn't feel less than till I saw more than. And they resent.
Resent. Like you made me small. No, you accepted your smallness.
I didn't. That's it. You accepted your smallness. I did not accept mine.
That's it. That's the only difference. And they know that's the only difference that they chose to accept their smallness and you said, no, I won't be small.
Fuck that. I am not built to be an atom of convenience for the powers that be.
I'm not built to be a lever that people yank to get gold out of my ass.
I am not built to be nothing so that the power lustrous can feel something.

[1:38:28] When you accept what human beings are capable of, what human beings' potential is, what your potential is, when you accept that and manifest it, yeah, people hate it.
I don't care. I don't care. I mean, I'd like it if they didn't hate it.
I'd like it if they embraced it, but I can't control that. I can't control that.
But I'll be goddamned. I'll be goddamned if I will let other people's pettiness rob me of the glory I'm capable of.
What a repulsive waste of God's grace that would be.
God. To take the improbable manifestation of the star stuff of the universe, capable of the most glorious world-spanning and epoch-spanning and time-spanning thoughts, and compress it down into a broken car cube of nothing.
Oh, we don't want other people to feel small. We don't want other people to feel like they missed out on the boat. We don't want other people to... Oh, my God.
Talk about letting nothing win. It's one thing to lose to a titan.
It's one thing to lose to a devil.
It's one thing to lose to Satan himself.
It's quite another thing to lose to nothing, to fluff, to compression, to sour looks and negative thoughts and hostility and side eyes.

[1:39:54] You think that what i do is singular, it's not, it's not, you think you can't do what i do you can maybe not do in the same way might not do it to the same extent may not do it in the same venue.

[1:40:25] I am just life without any preordained sense of restraint, without any prejudgment as to capability.
I start the speech, I have a couple of vague ideas. I don't know how each sentence, each argument, each metaphor, each analogy, I don't know how it's all going to build.
I don't know. I love finding out.
It's great to find out. It's exciting to find out.

[1:40:53] No, Chris, you say to lose to yourself is a tragedy. No, you can't lose to yourself.
That's to say that you're trying to dominate yourself. You're an enemy to yourself.
You can't lose to yourself. You can only lose to the pettiness of others.
You can only self-erase to keep the small-minded from feeling their insignificance, to feeling their pettiness, their limitations.
You blow past limitations, people resent you because they know they accepted a smallness. They didn't have to.
Especially the age of the internet. No gatekeepers. Anyone can say anything and do anything.
What is the limit on what we can do?
I can't find it. What's the limit on what I can do? I can't find it.
I keep running after what I can do. Can't catch it.
It's great. It's exciting. It's wonderful. But I don't think at all that I'm singular in that.

Bringing Others Down with Insecurities and Refusal to Fix

[1:42:01] And you know and i know that there's people in this audience who do this there's people in this audience i'm not even going to ask you if i'm going to be harsh because i'm just going to be hard i'm just going to be harsh do you know the most common way that you and i and everyone do you know the most common way that we bring people down do you know the the most common way we bring people down and shred them and atomize them and turn them into dust clouds of nothing, turn them into fog.

[1:42:34] The way that we bring each other down is we bring our insecurities in the face of other people and refuse to fix them, refuse to handle them, refuse to deal with them.
Yes, but, yes, but, yes, but, yes, but, yes, but, yes, but, fuck off.

[1:42:57] Absolutely not.
People bring their inability to me all the time. You hear this a million times in call-in shows.
What happened? I don't know. Yes, you do. What was so motivating?
I don't know. Yes, you do. Yes, you do. I refuse to accept that you don't know.
I refuse to accept that you don't have knowledge.
I refuse to accept that you're not capable of understanding what happened to your childhood. No.
You bring to your friends your insecurities.
Your friends may try to help you, and you don't fix them.
And that's how you bring down all the potential in the human condition.
Always, always. And you have friends. Tell me, you've done this, I've done this, everyone's done this, this is not some criticism from me on high, oh, I've never done this. I've done it. You've done it. Come on.
Tell me about your friends who complain and don't fix. They neither drop it nor fix it.

Heartbreak and Speech of the Gods

[1:44:08] I'm insecure because of this. This isn't working because of that.
I'm sad because I never asked the girl. We had this one at the beginning, right?
I had this one at the beginning. Now, the guy who said, and no disrespect to the guy, I'm glad you brought it up, right?
He said, a childhood friend of mine is getting engaged tonight.
We're both in college. I had lingering feelings for her for years, pre-philosophy.
She's been in a relationship. We haven't maintained contact during college. I'm heartbroken.
And I gave him a speech of the gods, didn't I? I gave him a speech of the gods.
I gave him a speech of the gods.
And what did he say?
You give me something to think about. Maybe I'll do something.
Can you define drop it? Just want to confirm, do you mean if the thought comes up, not to act it out?

[1:45:17] Well, you challenge it.
I'm balding. That's unattractive. Okay.
Are we going to get hair transplants? Are we going to fix it? No. Then shut up.

[1:45:35] Because if we get hair transplants, we're out of money, we have less money to date, we have now tattooed insecurity on the top of our head forever.
So we are maximum attractiveness because if we thought we could be more attractive or would be more attractive in a moral sense by getting more hair, so drop it.
Drop it, you don't think I feel like I'm on a bit of a high wire act sometimes under buffeting winds and hailstorms and crows attacking my eyeballs and Prometheus style vultures pecking at my liver it feels like a bit of a high wire act at times, I can hear that voice in my head what do you mean you gave him a speech of the gods are you crazy I have that voice I have that voice, And I'm like, it's a great speech.
Are you going to tell me it's not? And the voice that says, what do you mean you gave a speech to the guards? That's crazy.
I say, okay, if you could make the speech better, why didn't you say anything?
You didn't say anything. Now you're giving me quibbling after the fact, so shut up.
I don't care. If you can make the speech better, tell me how to make it better.
If you can't tell me how to make the speech better, I don't want to hear your judgment of me saying it was a great speech.
Do you hear what I'm saying? This is what I say to my sort of inner insecurities.
Put up or shut up I could do it better than you well you're wrong to think it was that great okay great tell me how to do it better I'm happy oh you got nothing to say then shut up shut the fuck up.

[1:47:03] Nothing wrong with being stern with yourself and having empirical requirements, for the inner voices am I wrong tell me if I'm wrong seems to work works fine that was a great speech well it wasn't that great hey did you tell me anything during the speech Should you give me any analogies or metaphors or jokes to make it better or funnier? No, then shut up.
I don't want to hear your judgment if you didn't contribute.

[1:47:33] I don't want to listen to your judgment if you didn't contribute.
If you didn't know how to do it better, I don't want you judging me, about how I can do it better.
And I don't know that there's any feedback that I can take about how to do this thing which has never been done before.
I don't know that there's anyone who can tell me anything about how to do this thing that I'm doing that has never been done before.

[1:48:12] And I'm happy to take feedback, as you know, from people, from anybody, from myself. Happy to take feedback.
Love it. Love the feedback.
But the feedback can't be, undefined. Well, you said you just did a speech of the gods.
Are you saying you're a god? Didn't say that.
I said gods, plural. Like it's almost a superhuman feat to do a speech like that. I think it is.
Well, I don't think it is. Okay, show me better speeches. Show me speeches that are more concise, more packed, more motivating, more, and I'll study those, right?
Amazing that you can present an argument to your own inner voices.
Would you ever take an apprentice, Steph?

Challenging Verbal Abuse and Self-Doubt

[1:49:11] That's not how an apprentice would work with me, well you see this yeah paul are you right first thing you learned in your career don't complain about something unless you have a better idea you hear this all the time your plan sucks do you have a better plan, pardon me james says once a sabotage getting fit and healthy i have to tell them to fuck off yeah I mean I get the gentleness like I'm willing to listen every part of myself I'm willing to listen but I'm not, I'm not like it's a universal standard I don't take verbal abuse I don't take verbal abuse and one of the worst forms of verbal abuse is maybe you're not enough maybe it's not good enough maybe it's maybe you're delusional maybe you're wrong maybe this maybe like based on no standard other than the slow acidic rain of self-doubt there's no standard that you can't point to any facts, acts so you can't i don't like if somebody was was the you know the fear uncertainty and doubt people the fud people like well maybe this is cautious you got to be really careful saying for what for what i understand you got to be really careful i understand that, but so saying well you got to be really careful it's like so what does that mean let me find somebody's learning how to ride a bike if i say my daughter's learning how to ride a bike i taught her how to ride a bike so you got to be really careful it's like she knows she's got to be be really careful.
I'm not adding any value.
So I think about it like my inner conversations is like a conversation on social media.

[1:50:38] Social media. People would constantly tell me, well, here's how to improve your engagement. I'd look at them. They've got 12 followers.
If you're not ahead of me, don't tell me how to catch up. I mean, it's wild.
Well, you shouldn't talk about this and you shouldn't talk about that.
And this This is right, this is, it's the same thing, right?
Fear, uncertainty, and doubt. You got to be really careful.
Thank you, Karak. I appreciate that.
I'm happy to take feedback, but I don't take acid.

[1:51:21] If I wouldn't accept it from someone outside of myself, why on earth would I accept it from someone inside of myself?
If I wouldn't accept it from my mother, why would I accept it from my inner mother?
If I wouldn't accept it from someone on social media, why would I accept it in my head? You all understand what universal is.
Universal doesn't stop at the skull, right?
Universal doesn't stop at the skull.
And also, this is another thing, too. If I wouldn't talk to someone else like that, I sure as shit I'm going to talk to myself like that.
If I wouldn't talk to someone else like that, I sure as shit I'm not going to talk to myself like that. You follow?
Like, if I wouldn't FUD bomb someone else, we're going to be careful, right? I would never do that to someone else, so I don't accept it if I wouldn't do it for someone else I wouldn't accept it for myself.

[1:52:21] You've got to be really careful you've got to be so careful no, you may choose to do that I don't choose to do that I mean intellectuals have been careful for 3,000 fucking years and they haven't even brought up child abuse.
You kidding me? You kidding me with this shit?
Gotta be really careful. People might get upset with you. Oh dear.
Oh no. It could be typing on the internet.
They have people like, people literally want me to care more about other people's bad opinion of me than millions of children not getting beaten.
You know how insane that is?

[1:53:10] Well Steph, you could continue to talk about children getting beaten and peaceful parenting and all these other things, but abusers will be upset with you.

[1:53:25] I mean, isn't that, to me, this is the exact equivalent. This is how it translates in my head.
This is the exact equivalent if I was working and I had some cure for cancer, right?
And people say, well, you know, you could have a cure for cancer, but you do realize that all the people who make money from treating cancer are going to be really upset with you.
It's like, so what, you want like tens of millions of people a year to die in agony from cancer because other people want to make some fucking money?
Like that's beyond repulsive like that's so beyond repulsive I can't even tell you well let's let people die in agony so we can make some money, so you want me to pull back on advocating for children because child abusers will get really angry so you think that, I should in my mind's eye and knowing it's happening let and watch children be beaten and tortured because evil people might be upset.
I don't think people understand the gig. I don't think they understand anything about virtue. Oh, you can't go too fast. Really?
Really. Look how quickly the obsession with the modern shibboleths became an obsession like that, right?
Oh, you can't go too fast. Really?

[1:54:50] Gradualism in theory is perpetuity in practice.

[1:54:58] I mean, I get this reasonable caution. I get that. I understand that.
I mean, I'm, you know, I'm not, I'm in the Aristotelian mean when it comes to courage, but what if, be careful and don't, do you, do you listen?
Do you even listen to yourself?
Do you, do you look at yourself, man? They're trying to get you to go outside yourself and judge yourself like some cold, clammy God. And it's just, that's repulsive.
That's repulsive.
And you'll also notice that no one who's really criticized me has ever shown me a shred of sympathy for being the victim of some pretty severe child abuse right hey man like i know you had it rough you know here's blah blah blah right no so i was like oh he was abused oh let's pour more verbal abuse on the guy bet you that'll get him to change his ways ah no sorry been through that did that done that know the ending of that movie not tempted to see it again.

[1:55:57] Boy we traveled quite a bit there didn't we come on tell me that ain't a tip worthy set of syllables, value for value if this helps change your life what is changing your life worth a couple of bucks, I gotta think so I gotta think so because if some stuff like this changes your life but it's not worth a couple of bucks you're saying changing your life isn't worth a couple of bucks therefore you're saying I'm not worth a couple of bucks, that's not good for you is it I mean really it's not good for you it's not good for you, thank you Rivalo I appreciate that that's very kind thank you.

[1:56:40] Thank you for some of the times where I've got people in the ass end of the world who need a call-in show at one o'clock in the morning. I'll do it.
I'll do it. Although I'm a little old to bounce around the time zones for sleep.
But I'll do it. I'll do it.
It's a show for me, but it's a life for somebody else. I get that.
Value for value, that's right. Thanks, Josh. You are right.

[1:57:04] Du bist fichtig. Ich licht du nicht, du licht ich nicht. Aha.
Da-da-da-da alright I think I may be running low on juice.

[1:57:20] But I really do appreciate everyone coming by tonight thank you, thank you so much, what a great chat and convo that we had, thank you David, I appreciate that and yeah, listen, if you want to get more over the one-itis with your girl who's getting married, or the girl who's getting married, call in at, call in at, if you have call-ins that you want.
I know they're very popular and I'm happy to do them.
Call in at You can send me an email and we will work something out if you can include your Skype ID.
So much the better and some rough time of when you're available.
Also, time zone doesn't hurt either, but definitely the Skype ID.
That helps a lot. All right.
Thank you everyone so much for your time and attention tonight.
A great privilege and honor as it always is to chat with you guys.
Guys, I feel deeply humbled and elevated at the same time by what we're able to achieve together as a community. Thank you so much.
If you're listening to this later, of course, slash donate, slash donate to help out the show. Massively appreciate that as well.
Have yourself a glorious evening. Don't forget to check out my books, slash books, particularly the present and the future.
I'm re-listening to the present and, oh man, it's so good. It's so good.
It's so good. I got you. All right.
Thanks, everyone. Take care, guys. Have a great night. Bye.

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April 2024

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