0:12 - Dark Reflections on Humanity
25:00 - Embracing Death and Revolution
36:20 - The Nature of Hate
45:55 - Isolation and the Search for Connection
58:05 - The Consequences of Civilization
This lecture provides a detailed analysis of the manifesto written by Samantha Rupnow, the Wisconsin shooter. It begins with the hosting party discussing their initial discomfort regarding the sensitive nature of the material. However, after receiving feedback, they decided to delve into the manifesto titled "The War Against Humanity," a six-page document that reveals Samantha’s thoughts and motivations leading to her tragic actions.
The lecture explores Samantha’s childhood, marked by her tumultuous relationship with her parents. Described as feeling unloved and unwanted, she voices a deep-seated rage towards them, indicating a belief that her family failed her profoundly. This background sets the stage for her subsequent feelings of isolation and the grotesque admiration she expresses for other shooters, highlighting how her experience of bullying and familial dysfunction warped her perception of humanity. The host articulates the dangers of “courting evil,” cautioning that allowing oneself to linger near destructive thoughts can lead to a fall into nihilism and hatred.
Throughout the manifesto, Samantha mixes her self-criticism with disdain for society at large, referring to others as “scum” and expressing a desire for public executions as a solution to societal issues. The lecture attempts to unpack this concerning rhetoric, positing that her embrace of violence stems from a blurring of personal identity—where Samantha sees herself in both victim and perpetrator roles. The exploration reveals how deep-rooted self-hatred and a lack of moral distinction led to her hazardous mindset.
The analysis takes a psychological turn as the narrator reflects on the absence of positive influences and the chaotic environment surrounding Samantha. Comments about her family’s cyclical dysfunction, including her father’s alcoholism and her mother’s suicide attempts, contribute to a bleak depiction of her upbringing. The speaker discusses the implications of such an upbringing, stressing that without a solid moral framework or role models, individuals like Samantha drift towards violent ideologies as an outlet for their pain.
As the lecture progresses, it draws parallels between Samantha's thoughts and broader societal issues. For instance, the speaker underscores the role of social media in fostering a disconnect between individuals. Samantha’s manifesto is situated within a wider context of societal disintegration, highlighting how feelings of powerlessness can escalate into acts of aggression. The analysis posits that for those plagued by despair, acts of violence can feel like a misguided means of reclaiming agency.
In conclusion, the speaker urges listeners to recognize the importance of kindness and moral clarity in daily life, acknowledging that even small gestures can serve as a lifeline to those trapped in despair. The lecture calls for a collective responsibility to foster community and positivity, suggesting that neglecting the mental health and well-being of individuals, especially the young, can lead to catastrophic outcomes. This resonates as a plea for awareness and active participation in combating the isolation and nihilism that can escalate into violence, reiterating that positive actions can make a significant difference in the lives of those who feel marginalized or unheard.
[0:00] Okay, it's a dark topic. I did ask people, and not that I'm making other people responsible, but I did ask people about whether you wanted me to review this manifesto.
[0:13] There was an affirmative, so here it is. This is the Wisconsin shooter, the, gosh, it's a girl the same age as my daughter. It's just shocking and appalling and horrendous. But this guy writes, I've made contact with the alleged boyfriend of the Wisconsin shooter. He has very graciously provided me the full manifesto, which I verified by having him screen record himself, opening it from a direct link the shooter sent to him via WhatsApp. I told him I would do my best to dispel some of the misinformation and present things as truthfully as I was given them, and I will hold myself to that. Her boyfriend knew her as Samantha Rupnow. She also went by a different name, one which was also feminine, but she adopted the name Samantha, and this was the name her boyfriend says she has on her school identification card. She was a student at Abundant Life, and that's a Christian school.
[1:05] She was born on November 7, 2009. She was born female and was not transgender. Her boyfriend was born male and is not transgender. Her manifesto was titled The War Against Humanity, six pages long. She spoke about having an extremely difficult relationship with her parents, whom she referred to as scum. She also claimed her family didn't love her or want her and expresses feelings like being the wrong child of her family. She says she had planned to commit suicide a long time ago, but felt committing a shooting was quote, better for evolution rather than just one stupid, boring suicide.
[1:37] She expresses deep admiration for a bunch of shooters. She offered particular praise for a shooter who was a Turkish neo-Nazi who committed a mass attack in place earlier this year and stated that he was an inspiration to her. She calls him an ultimate saint. She expressed that she got the weapons to commit the attack through lies, manipulation, and my father's stupidity. Anyway, so...
[2:02] This is what she had to say. And we'll skip some of it, but there is really, really important stuff. So just so you kind of understand this, evil, and I'm going to call her evil, of course, right? So evil is something that you play with, and then it takes you over, right? So you know this idea that you kind of have to be courted into sin and evil so everybody has you know bad ugly ideas and that's like a cliff edge and what what you need to do is prevent yourself from going near the cliff edge because there's a fascination you look over the cliff edge you lean a little further you lean a little further and then at one point you just topple so you have free will until you topple and then your free will is gone so when it comes to staring into the abyss, into courting evil and hatred, you have to avoid the cliff edge as a whole.
[3:05] And of course, I have no problem with aggressive feelings towards people who are doing evil. I mean, that would be self-defense and prison and so on. I have no problems with that. That's fine. In fact, I think that's healthy. But hatred towards the innocent, hatred towards those who have not done you harm, that is a cliff edge you have to stay back from. If you go to the cliff edge, you're going to get fascinated, you're going to lean a little further over, and then at some point you're just going to fall. Now, you have free will until you fall. And you'll see this over the course of looking at this manifesto, just exactly what was going on for her.
[3:46] So, A War Against Humanity, she writes, or wrote, the creation of a disaster, and why is it so unfair? Hatred, something everyone has gotten, in a sense, some people think it's pure nothing, but because of the hate they make, it ends up killing them without knowing it, which go right ahead, I don't mind, but kind of do at the same time. This is a lot that's packed into this, right? Hatred, something everyone has gotten, absolutely true, hatred is a natural human emotion.
[4:12] In a sense, some people think it's pure nothing, but because of the hate they make, it ends up killing them without knowing it. So is it a pure nothing? Hatred is not, of course, pure nothing. Hatred is active, virulent antipathy. Nothing is the kind of indifference that you have when you've made peace for something. So it's not nothing. Because of the hate they make, it ends up killing them without knowing it. Now, of course, what this means, the hate they make, she's talking about being bullied, but she's also talking about the hatred that she has as well, right? So I was certainly bullied at home as a kid, very little at school, but I was bullied at home. And you just make a pledge to yourself to get to a better and healthier place, to escape the trash planet, the corrupt people, the monstrous, the projectionists, the narcissists, and the sociopaths. You just got to get away from them and get to a healthier and better place. So the hate they make is both the bullying I hate because I was bullied but also the hate that she makes by not thinking of a better place it ends up killing them without knowing it.
[5:18] And that means that every little thing that you write, some people are pushed to the cliff edge or encouraged to the cliff edge or driven to the cliff edge. So killing them without knowing it means the people she shot, but also means her own soul. But you go right ahead. I don't mind, but kind of do at the same time. Right? So look at this. I don't mind. Right? Pure nothing and I don't mind. The hatred thing, she thinks, hatred is pure nothing. I don't mind. That's the pretense of pure nothing, but kind of do at the same time. She goes on to write, you are simply, you were just simply nothing but scum to this world or to even think about nobody should want you or your body in any way so the you here there is a blend of.
[6:01] The people who've bullied her and her own self so you are just simply nothing but scum to this world, now is that her characterizing how she was bullied or is that her talking about herself self. So this blend of self and other, you absolutely, completely and totally, and I've talked about this for decades, you absolutely, completely and totally need to have a clear delineation between self and other. Because if you don't have a clear delineation between self and other, you can never escape corruption. So if you're treated badly as a child, which of course so many of us are, but if you're treated badly as a child and you internalize that, then you can never escape being treated badly because you will simply internalize it, treat yourself badly. You can never escape. And through that comes nihilism, self-hatred, hatred of others, despair. Despair.
[7:00] Despair. And that is, really important. So, the fact that she's blurred her abuses with herself means that she can't have a differentiation between self and other. So, I mean, just to take a personal example, I don't want to make this about me, of course, I'm just trying to give a personal example to clarify something that it's tough to explain. So, my mother hated me, but I had to have a clear differentiation between myself and my mother. Otherwise, what would happen? Well, what would happen is if I internalized my mother's hatred of me, I could never escape my self-hatred, which means I would never find peace. I would never feel that a future was worth living and hatred would escalate, right? So my mother hated me. She was a messed up, dysfunctional person. It doesn't have anything to do with me. It's not personal to me. She hated her life. She hated herself. She hated her circumstances. She took it out on me, but it was not me.
[7:55] It was, I mean, anyone, anyone, right? So it's sort of like if someone shoots an arrow up in the air and it kind of lands on your foot randomly based on the wind or whatever. That's not personal. It hurts, of course, but it's not personal. So you'll see this throughout this manifesto, this blurring between self and other. It's really chilling. She says, I hate seeing people on a daily basis just being so sensitive. Gives me one more reason to take off my glasses. So just being so sensitive. So is it that they're so sensitive? I don't think so. I think she's talking about herself being so sensitive. And what that means is she doesn't have, I'm sorry, I know she's dead, of course, I'm talking about it in the present tense. She doesn't have a filter when she wrote this. She doesn't have a filter between other people and herself. So, you know, when, when, uh, if I was, I don't know, really sensitive about being bald or something and all the people who are like, Hey man, you're bald, man. Uh, it's like, I mean, why would I care? They're just people saying stuff. It's not in, it's not in my head. You know, this thing sort of lives rent-free in their head.
[9:04] In other people, in other people's head. That is, if you don't have this barrier, you can't evaluate what people say about you, and then you're oversensitive, right? If I was really sensitive, oh, my mother hates me, that means I'm hateful, that means I have to get my mother to not hate me, otherwise I remain hateful. Then I'm just a shadow. I'm not really a self, I'm a shadow cast by my mother's madness. And saying, my mother's mad, I'm not, she's her, I'm me, we're separate people, that is, you know, so just being so sensitive, she's sensitive because.
[9:43] She doesn't have the self and other distinction, in my opinion, all right, she says, the human scum is color and the way people are raised, the human scum is color and the way people are raised.
[9:57] And maybe she was bullied by, I don't know, other races. So maybe she was bullied by blacks or Hispanics or Indians or something else, maybe people from the Middle East. So I'm not sure if she's talking about race here and the way people are raised. Okay, that's really important. Of course, that's the basic argument of peaceful parenting, right? She says, I've grown around people who do not care or give one single care in the world and smoke their lungs out with weed or drink as much as they can, like my own father, right? So if her own father is her own father, who appears to be a severely dysfunctional and a drinker, and again, we don't know for sure. We didn't just go from what she's saying, right? I mean, I'm sure it'll be admitted, maybe, or found out. But if her own father is an alcoholic, and everyone else around her is an alcoholic, and it is kind of shocking just how much drinking is going on, how much drugs, weed, vaping, and drinking is going on among young people these days. So then she can't ever escape her childhood, right? She can't escape her childhood if everyone's like her dad. She says, I've grown to hate people and society. It's truly not my fault, though. It never was. But all of you and the world have done to me is pick and tease me. You've pushed me into a corner with no help whatsoever.
[11:19] So she's, when you don't have self and other, you are passive because in the same way that a shadow is passive, right? A shadow is passive because, you know, if you're walking around, your shadow's just kind of following you. So she says, it's not my fault though. I am what you made me, but that's not having a differentiation between self and other. And the differentiation, differentiation between self and other is judging other people in order to protect yourself. You cannot, cannot protect yourself without judging others. There's no way to do it. You cannot protect yourself without judging others. Otherwise, the most insistent and aggressive will define who you are, and you won't really have a self or an identity, which is where I think she ended up. She says, humanity is filth, and I don't like filth, nor want to live in it, nor should anyone else. And I know it follows me and how it has followed me and will follow everyone because of how the world is run. How the world is run. So it's people in charge. People in charge are abusive. So this means, of course, at home, at school, she was bullied at school. And, you know, there's sort of famous memes about, you know, if you misgender someone, the teacher will give you a detention, but if you're being severely bullied, nothing will happen, right? So, how the world is run. So.
[12:42] Humanity, everyone. So, it sounds like she did not meet a quality person. Now, it's really tough because if she was like very strange and odd and obviously a turbo weirdo, which I'm sure she was, then ostracism can be a way to say to people, you're doing wrong, you need to be more normal, you need to be more regular. And it can sort of help guide people back into more normal behavior. Now, by normal, I mean sort of healthy, I don't mean like just dysfunctional. So ostracism can be helpful that way, but ostracism can also drive people to the cliff edge, right? So if if somebody's being weird, like there's a bunch of kids, a bunch of teenagers near a cliff edge, somebody's being weird, then people might move away from that person, and then they'd say, oh, I guess I'm being weird, I'll be more normal, and then I'll go with the group. That can happen. But somebody, but they can also push the person out of the group, and then they just go to the cliff edge, and then fall over, and then come back with a vengeance, right? So, all right. There were so many things that I wanted to do as a kid, yet I can admit I was afraid of the other kids, and also even with my own parents, but I don't even trust them, and at that age as well, I didn't, and I never will.
[13:59] So the dreams of a kid. So when you're a kid, and this is hard, right? It's hard for people. I remember doing a shape the hell up world speech years ago. So when you're a kid, most kids, they're born kind of optimistic and enthusiastic and cheerful, and I can do anything, and I'm the greatest, and all of that kind of stuff. So many things I wanted to do as a kid, she says. I was afraid of the other kids, and also even with my own parents, but I don't even trust them. And at that age as well, I didn't, and I never will. So don't trust them. We don't know. I've gone through the manifesto, of course. We don't know what is the heart of darkness in the family. We don't know. We don't know. And she doesn't particularly say, and now that she's dead, I mean, even if she was alive, it would be hard to know for sure, right? Was there some sexual abuse in the family? Was there something, you know, as dark as dark can be? We don't know. So...
[14:58] She can't trust anyone. Her childhood dreams are destroyed. And everyone in society is like her parents. And there's no escape from it. She lives in hell, right? That's where she's coming from. So she says, my parents are scum, and there is nothing that will save them to make me think good of them ever again. No family to ever trust and to never trust society. There is two people, and only two people I would trust, one partially and one I would never doubt. So i don't know um of course i assume she's referring to her boyfriend um, so there was nothing that will save them to make me think good of them ever again no family to ever trust and to never trust society right so the the optimism as a child is broken by the abuses of the parents and then she goes out into society and because of the abuses of the parents and also because of the rather degraded nature of youth society at the moment, everyone's like her parents, and it's pretty terrible. She says, I can agree that I don't know what I'm doing with my life, but neither did my parents or anyone around me. I have changed, and I will not go back to that ever again. I'm hardened, and I'm different.
[16:10] So, she had a period of doubt. What am I going to do with my life? That is a moment of choice.
[16:18] What am I going to do with my life? Is my life going to be better? Right? I mean, my, my, my, and again, I don't want to make this about me. I'm just, I'm just trying to sort of give examples. But when I was a kid, you know, my core and main and central goal was just get out, get out, get out, like get out of this hellscape. This is not where I'm supposed to be. Uh, this, uh, this trash planet full of, you know, I mean, I grew up in sort of paper thin walls, people screaming at each other, the thuds of physical abuse and alcoholism. And, you know, I mean, it wasn't all that way. It wasn't quite down at the Mickey Rourke and Barfly level, but it was pretty bad. It was pretty bad. And I mean, I remember when we first moved to Toronto, we met our neighbors, we were supposed to go over for coffee, but the guy got drunk. He was a retired cop and he shot a gun into his wall. And it's just like, it's kind of hell, right? So just get out. But you have to believe that there's something better that's out there and and so this is the big problem right you you have this this hellscape of a family and a neighborhood life it's just horrible right and her parents got i think married and divorced three times like it was just absolute chaos and a complete nightmare and i think the judge said stop getting remarried when they finally got divorced for the third time or got divorced for the third time so you have this thing you.
[17:41] What is the world? What is the world when you're a kid? What is the world? And if you're in hell, then there's only two possibilities. Everything's hell, or there are good people out there. The whole world is hell, or there are good people out there. But then the problem is, if there are good people out there, if there are good people out there, why don't they come and help people? Like, why don't they come and help people?
[18:16] And it is, I mean, I had a good family when I was in Canada, became friends with a good family, but they never mentioned anything about the dysfunction in my home, even though they saw it, and never lifted a finger to help or to ask. And even many years later, right, long after I was an adult, oh, how's your mother? How's your dear mother? How's your poor mother? Blah, blah, blah, right? So, if you're surrounded by evil, either the whole world is evil, in which case there's nothing to live for, or there are good people out there who are helpless and blind to evil, in which case evil runs the world, right? This is really, this is one of the reasons why I do my best to help my fellow victims of evildoers, right? And I have in public thousands of these conversations listened to by tens or hundreds to millions of people, because I want everyone to know that good people can circle back and help the victims of evil because otherwise nihilism and hatred is very hard to fight. All right, so she says, this situation and the situation of a lifetime is a get the F out moment and don't come back. I will never go back and nag my way through life. It's not even my fault though, it's everyone else's. It has to be theirs and not mine.
[19:34] So the situation is a get the F out moment and don't come back, I will never go back and nag my way through life I assume that that's her father if he's a drunk and her mother if she's a nag I will never go back and nag my way through life it's not even my fault though it's everyone else's it has to be theirs and not mine, right so that's again this is really fascinating it's not even my fault though now of course her Her childhood situation is not her fault. We can completely and totally agree with that. Her childhood situation is not her fault. But it is...
[20:11] It is her responsibility what she does with it. It has to be theirs and not mine. Now, that's the cliff edge, right? That's falling over the cliff edge, right? It's not my fault, though. It's everyone else's. Well, not everyone, because her fellow kids, who she attacked and slaughtered, her fellow kids are victims of their circumstances and environment as well, right?
[20:34] So, if she says, it's not my fault how I'm reacting as a child, and then she goes and shoots other children, she's saying it's their fault but not mine. I mean, that's a massive moral error, right? If she's helpless, then the other kids are helpless too, right? So it has to be their fault, theirs and not mine. So it has to be theirs and not mine in order for her to do the evil that she's fallen into. She says it's pure idiotic for people to cause this, but it's a good thing that this happens. It always is and there will always be a reason for this and reasons for other shootings, unless it's some Indian guy who wanted to blow up just for the fun of it. Anyway, so it's pure idiotic from people to cause this, but it's a good thing that this happens. So I think what she's saying is she's passive in the face of her own rage. She has not got the self-other differentiation. She's unable to evaluate the people around her, and therefore she's just a reflection of them and her behavior she perceives of as being caused by their abuses and teasing and picking on her. It's pure idiotic for people to cause this. But it's a good thing that this happens. There will always be a reason for this and reasons for other shootings.
[21:57] And I find that a bit funny. So, yeah, why do people tease and attack the outsiders? Well, it's tough because if you've ever tried to be nice to an outsider, their instability can creep into your life, right? So if you see the man with the lonely eyes, you'll just take his hand, you'll be surprised. If you befriend as a kid, and most people with a sort of sensitive soul have tried this, If you befriend a kid who is really disturbed, what happens is you get, they'll really glom onto you because you are, you know, water in a desert. You are a buffet in the land of starvation. So they'll really glom onto you and they get kind of obsessive and then you get dragged into their hellscape of a family life and you can't do anything about that. And like, it is a real mess. And asking kids to fix what adults have broken is really tough. It's sort of like if your father, you know, stabs you, and then you go to school, and you ask some random kid to stitch you up. Like, that's just not a thing. It's not something that can be fixed. Other kids can't fix what adults break. So, that's tough. And she's saying also, other people have caused this. I am merely a passive receptacle of other people's thoughts.
[23:26] She says, maybe you'll see me as a weirdo, a freak, just as some of you do now, but I'm not. I'm not like the others. I would never ever want to be like them with how they think and what they do on a simple day. I hate how the population thinks, grows, and talks, and how they make romance fake. If only some days we could do a public execution, that would be gladly needed. I wouldn't mind throwing some stones at idiots or even watching from the far back when they get hanged. So I'm not like the others. I would never, ever want to be like them with how they think and what they do on a simple day. I hate how the population thinks, grows and talks, and how they make romance fake. So how they make romance fake could be a reference to her father's and mother's multiple marriages and divorces. It could be a boy who broke her heart or something like that.
[24:17] So I am not like the others, and I would never, ever want to be like them. So she's a pure outsider. in that she rebels against the savagery and shallowness of her familial and school environment. She doesn't mention her job, so I assume it's mostly family and school. So if you hate the people around you, you have to believe there's a better place. You have to believe there's a place to escape to. You have to believe there's a place to grow to, to get to. And there is, there is there is there is there is you do not have to stay in the land of the unholy.
[25:00] She says twitter can prove that for a fact or so i think and i think a lot more than some people think i do or maybe they don't think what i think because most people can't do what i'm going to do death is something most people need to embrace and accept rather than running away from it, so if she's been treated in this horrible manner then she's probably going to say something like um i'm now like sort of an antibody or something like that right so, once you know you'll be proven guilty in all charges and wish to be killed in any good way that is not simple and is more painful than anything or at least i would hope on that behalf, so i'm just sorry this is i just want to make sure i understand this.
[25:49] Once you know, proven guilty. So then she's like an ex-justice executioner, right? She's saying that if you knew how horrible you were, you would want to die, and therefore, I am a bringer of peace or something like that, right? And then, I don't know if this is a quote from someone else, revolution of population, the revolution should be well, the population should be well, but it's not and never will be. I want to change that, but will I truly? The population of scum has been worked over the years as it did during the wars and fighting over what should be right and wrong i'm not sure what that means has been worked over the worked over over the years okay the sick people will dissolve into dust and be forgotten about you will ruin the human population and turn into whores of filth and beings that shouldn't live, whores and scum are things i hate the most and will always hate you have no meaning you and your parents should be hanged in front of everyone. Now, I'm not sure what she means, because this is the entrance of whores.
[26:59] And Horace, did her mother stay with her father mostly for money, right? So where did the Horace thing come into? Horace is not promiscuous. Horace is sleeping with a man or a boy for money. So maybe this could be a friend who likes to be, you know, spoiled, or, you know, like she'll date a guy if he'll spend money on her.
[27:23] So then so you and your parents should be hanging in front of everyone you have no meaning so you have no meaning I assume is that there are people in her environment who are simply, acting on animal impulses you have no meaning and then there's some racist stuff here, I don't care who you think you are or what you've done good for this world of yours, it will never matter because you will always have no thought and no brain to continue with. So again, these are people just reacting. Now, if she's surrounded by people who she perceives of as just reacting, as not processing, as not thinking, as not evaluating, as not judging, then that lack of initiative, that lack of judgment will spill over to her and then she'll have no resistance against her darkest impulses. It's kind of, in Crime and Punishment, Raskolnikov keeps toying with the idea of justice through murder. And because he toys with the idea, he keeps leaning over the cliff edge until he falls. She says.
[28:36] I hate looking at some of the people in the society and seeing what they are and what they with their lives. Like, how does one do that? But I know how, out of scum and just pure retardedness. Again, so she's just, people just react, people just react. And I assume that her parents, who, again, got married and divorced a couple of times, oh, I love you. Oh, I hate you. They're just literally pushed around by their feelings. They have no will. They have no judgment. Judgment? We have judgment so that we can moralate. I was going to say morally evaluate, moralate. We have judgment so that we can morally evaluate things and not just react on instinct and impulse and feeling and desire so that we can be more than animals, right? So.
[29:21] She says, I'm glad to be different and not the same as other people. I know how to be formal. I know how to use my words. Even if I get mad at you, there has always been a reason whether or not I despise you or just because I can. I know how to be formal. I know how to use my words.
[29:40] So formal and words, this is higher brain functioning, right? This is not animals are not formal. Animals don't have words. There always has to be a reason whether or not I despise you or just because I can. So, if she hates someone because she describes, or just because I can, in other words, because she has power. Right? So, hatred comes from power and the reaction to power. So, hatred comes from being abused by people who have power over you, and because she's so, quote, sensitive, everyone has power over her. So then again this is the blurring between self and other which is she has been abused by those in power so hatred is the hatred that is allowed to be executed because power means that you can, enact your hatred and the victims of those who enact the hatred because they have the power also hate right i despise you or just because i can right some of you guys really do deserve the execution punishment, rather painful or not, you deserve to be dead. But yet, doesn't the whole world deserve that? And again, there is no escape. There are no better people. It is so important. Listen, if you go through the world and you do something decent and moral every day, something, it doesn't really matter what.
[31:00] You show someone some kindness. You show someone some nobility. You show someone some moral courage. You reach out a hand to help those in need. Do something every day. Do something every day. Because you never know who's dealing with the nihilism of defining humanity as, as she says, scum, filth, whores, right? So if somebody has just been repeatedly exposed through to the worst elements of humanity, if you can show them the better elements of humanity, you don't know how many lives you might save. Like, honestly, this is not, you'll never know for sure, but it's more, I get to guarantee you, it's more than zero over the course of your life. You're like literally a life saver. it's kind of like, if you've ever been trapped in a really really pitch dark place like a place that's so dark that I'm not even talking metaphorically like it's so dark there's some cave some coal cell or something you've ever been in a place that's so dark there's no difference between your eyes open and your eyes being closed, and if it's that dark it's really hard to move really hard to figure out what to do.
[32:06] But if there's even a glimmer of light that lights up the place then suddenly everything begins to snap into focus and you can move more easily. You just need to be a glimmer of light. In this pitch black, people get very, very black-hearted and dark. Just please, please be that glimmer of light. And I don't mean you're a glimmer. I just mean that even a bright light, I mean, it's sunlight outside. One little crack in the wall of the coal cellar will let the light in, even though the light is blinding. It's just, if a person's in a really dark place, just show something better. Maybe this is online, maybe this is in person. Just show something better, and you will save people's lives. Um...
[32:48] So, she says the main target has to be anyone with some sort of feeling or being of knowing any action to turn you wrong and left rather than the right and the better. So, she's saying that if you have feeling and if you have moral judgment, then you will be punished. So, she's saying that there are people with moral judgment. They should have chosen better and she's going to punish them for not. But of course, that's a blurring between self and other because now she's doing a greater evil, far greater evil than anyone who did evil to her, at least that we know of.
[33:24] She says, either way, I will always hate humanity. It will never be overruled. If someday it's so overruled and I shall never see that day and knowing how this world is and how everyone is scum of filth, nobody will ever overrule it. All everyone will be is some worthless thing. Okay, so what she's saying here, I think, is that humanity will never be overruled. In other words, people have these horrible impulses, you know, they lust, they want drink, they drink, they lust, they have sex, they want to get high, they get high, they want to bully, they bully, they, you know, they just, they will never be overruled by any higher standard, right? Society, humanity will never be overruled. Everybody just reacts. Everybody just acts out their impulses. Everybody projects. There's no moral standard anywhere in her life, right? So if someday it's so overruled, in other words, it has, I mean, you could say this is some sort of fascist leader or something like that, but I think people are scum or filth in her view because they could do better, but they don't. And whatever you define humanity as, you also infect yourself with, right? So if she says humanity just acts on its darkest impulses and can't be overruled, then she's not going to have any resistance against her own darker impulses and is going to do these horrible, evil things, right?
[34:47] So if someday it is so overruled, and I shall never see that day, and knowing how this world is and how everyone, nobody will ever overrule it and everybody will be is some worthless thing, right? So she's saying humanity without morals, without any kind of overruling of darkest impulses, of greediest impulses, of most abusive impulses, she will never see the world overruled, she will never see morality restrain corruption. And then, of course, she can't use any morality to restrain her own corruption and evil. She says that out of all serious talk, though, how everyone forces either religion on others or how some people just disobey the right from wrong and using the wrong for the worse.
[35:31] So it forces either religion on others or how some people just disobey the right from wrong and using the wrong for the worst. I mean, that's her judgment of humanity is permission to herself. Her judgment of humanity is permission. It's like if you say, and I've said this countless times to people, of course, in call-in shows, if you say, well, my parents, well, they were 35 or 40 and they were ruled by their childhoods. They had no free will. They had no choice. It's like, then you're saying this to yourself as well. You can't, it's like, it's like thinking you can dial up universal gravity for everyone except yourself, right? She says, what I'm simply doing is not wrong one single bit, may be sure to some people due to its harmful studies, according to some people.
[36:20] And she's, the simply thing as well, she said a simple day, simply, morality simplifies and corruption complicates. If you've ever tried to get someone to admit fault they just get complicated the gaslighted long windy statements I just had a call in show like this and you.
[36:44] Whereas I did it is simple, right? So morality simplifies and corruption complicates. So it's not wrong one single bit, maybe short of some people due to its harmful studies, according to some people. So she's saying everything is subjective, everything is relative. And this is why I say you do not, you do not frack with relativism and subjectivism. It will corrode your mind and resist your moral and corrupt your moral will. She says the hate I get and the hate you get is mutual, you hate me, and I will say, I will hate you as well, no matter what you've done to me, but you will always have a little place of hate. It's just a war of all against all. I don't care what you think, though, nor would I really ever. I'd rather be dead than sit in a room all day, no matter if it's schoolwork or even my own room. Even if I like being alone, I will never be like anyone else and ruin my mind. So, if society doesn't have anything to offer young people, then they will become nihilistic, right? So society says, obey my rules and you can get a decent job. You can have a family, you can, right? And once society stops offering these things, nihilism and violence grows in the mind of the young. And nihilism and violence is at the moment channeled into pornography and video games. But in the long run, it's probably not going to stay there, which is one of the reasons I don't do politics anymore.
[38:14] So, she's saying that what society has to offer me is not at all appealing. Everybody's corrupt, everybody's scum, she says, and I don't have any future to look forward to. Society has nothing to offer me, right? She says, I am part of the real thought and the real revolution, right? So, things need to change. She's saying things need to change in society. Okay.
[38:40] So, there is some, this guy writes, uh, some more Wisconsin shooter info. Her boyfriend had known her for two years. They were in a long distance relationship and never met in person. They met on social media. He says she never previously expressed any desire to commit a shooting and only sent him her manifesto on the day of the shooting. Time sends that their message is, okay, um, he did not see her message until 1, 12 p.m. Eastern, at which point she acted being committed. She was already deceased. He describes her as being kind, generous towards him, and cheerful. He describes her as always making him gifts and never expecting anything in return. Okay, so the praise of the killers, and that's, I think, page three. Page four.
[39:27] Okay, so introduction of myself. My name is Samantha Rupp now. Now, and then this is just like if it was a dream and somebody dreamt this name, or if there was, in fact, a sort of simulation that was real, then you would say, R. R. R. R. P. Now would be R. I. P. Now, right? Rest in peace now. But it's R. U. P. Now, you rest in peace now. So the I and the U, because she was a murderer and committed and killed herself. I think that's right. She was not killed by the car. I don't think the police shot at all when they showed up. So R. U. P. Now, R. I. P. you and I will be R-I-P now, R-U-P now. So, she says, I was born blah, blah, blah, after some attack. Nobody knows I'm doing this. I got the weapons by lies and manipulation of my father's stupidity. I planned on shooting myself a while ago. Murder and suicide are two sides of the same coin.
[40:22] But thought maybe it's better for evolution rather than just one stupid, boring suicide, which hopefully I'll reach that point. I planned this myself and nobody else. I act alone. There would have been no way to change what has happened. You can't and you never will know. You never cared too much to know anything about me. I'm glad you don't know. So this is, what is the central trauma that would lead someone to this place of murderous hatred, right? It's more than her father being an alcoholic. Obviously, there are many people whose fathers are alcoholics. it's more than her parents getting divorced and married many times. Something happened and likelihood is we'll never know. I mean, the most likely thing would be severe and brutal sexual abuse. But I'm not saying that happens in the home. It could happen just about just about any place. But that would be the most likely thing. But again, we'll almost certainly never know at this point. But you can't and you never will know. There would have been no way to change what has happened.
[41:22] So she's in place of no free will. So you need people around you, people in the world need to see you resisting corruption. And that gives them the strength to resist corruption. You know, what one man can do, another man can do. So you need to show that you're tempted and you need to show that you can resist temptation that strengthens other people. And it doesn't look like there were people in her life who modeled that or showed that at all.
[41:58] So, if I was right, was there another page? Yes. She said, I've always been a quiet kid, I'd say, or at least that's what everyone else around me has said. I never really had the brains for most things because I wasn't smart enough for people around me, even though I'm good at science and some stuff. Nobody really looked at me in a good way in elementary or middle school, nor even high school right now. It doesn't matter much, because I like being alone, right? So that's the defenses, right? Sometimes I just hate being picked on, but yet I mourn for friends. But sooner or later, they'll leave. My therapist sucks. He's just some weak and fat guy who doesn't deserve anything he has now. Nobody deserves anything good. So, I mean, gosh, so she was in therapy and had been for quite some time, as far as I understand.
[42:50] And a therapist, it's tough, man. If you're a therapist, it's tough. And maybe he was a bad therapist. Of course, I don't know. I'm sure his notes will come to light or maybe. And so what do you do with a kid in a really, really bad family situation, right? What do you do?
[43:12] She says, my so-called family never included me because I was too weird for them. My father never treated me with respect. My father will always make me stand out in the worst possible way, bring up how I fail school or can't get out of bed simply because I don't want to leave. He makes me look like a freak to his family and friends. He says so much, but look at his bad side. My parents forced quite a few times, which didn't help me at all. But not, I think it means per se, nor did it really affect me. It just made me a little lonely because nobody was there for me and never really has. My mother, this is chilling, right? My mother tried overdosing. When I was around 12 or something, I don't care if she would have survived or died from it, but yet she was still here. Doesn't mean she actually was in my life. So this is, I mean, sheer chaos within the family, right?
[44:00] And if a loser treats you with disrespect, that brings out a particular type of rage. And if she views her father as a loser, and he treats her with this, he's constantly mocking her, denigrating her in public, right? Always makes me stand out in the worst possible way. So that's just horrible and appalling. And of course, if she was in therapy, I don't know if it's a psychologist or a psychiatrist, but if she was in therapy, the question then is, was she on psychotropic medications. Was she on SSRIs? Because, of course, some of those can give you suicidal ideation, homicidal impulses, massive rage issues, and so on, right? So, as far as I understand, I'm just amateur in these matters.
[44:47] So, father tried overdosing. No, sorry, mother tried overdosing when I was around 12. So mother is suicidal and father is verbally aggressive, abusive, dismissive, and father married a woman who was suicidal. She says, I see my parents as failures for everything they've done to me and just kind of effing with my life. There never was helpful advice given to me. It was all bullshit. The world itself is bullshit, to be fair though. So why should I or you see so much in it, right? So everyone around her is trash from what she sees and going to school doesn't help that because the kids are trash the teachers are trash and I assume extended family if there is any is trash, and all of that it's just monstrous and her therapist is is trash I mean obviously she's a deeply evil person but she was also failed by everyone in her life it sounds like.
[45:49] Yeah, no helpful advice given to me. This is something that I ask my listeners, right? I mean, what advice did your parents give you? Were you parented?
[45:56] And you say, oh, my parents. Okay, were you parented? What advice did your parents give you that you still use to this day, right?
[46:05] She said, I've never really liked my father to be exact, because honestly, why should I? Our hate is mutual to each other. He will never see me as his daughter. He will never love me like he loved his ex or her kids or even alcohol. But that doesn't matter. It doesn't matter anymore because nobody heard me out and just made fun of me my entire life, and I'm sick of it. Oof, oh my gosh. He loves alcohol, he shows affection to other kids, and stays away from her. She says, I've been trapped and forced into my corner. I hate this corner that I'm stuck in. I hate humanity for forcing me into this little hole. I once had this time when I was young. You made me dig for so long, and now I can't leave, but only look up at your smiles laughing at me. I honestly don't remember how old i was i know i was young but i remember everything that still happened because it happens every once in a while never have i once brought this up to a therapist anyone because nobody cared at that time nor will now i saw things around me and i laid on the floor not being able to move i was overwhelmed and tired hard breath things around me felt bigger than usual and i was faint once in a while i get that same feeling just i know how to control it that one night I begged for my mother to help me, but she was in the next room to be in her apartment where she was with her boyfriend, awake, because all I heard was her walking right past me and my room.
[47:24] That's actually quite grim and dark and powerful and horrible.
[47:34] So she's in a hole. and where to it's prey right prey digs a hole right think of the gophers and the prey species dig holes rabbits right they dig holes the warrens so, she's in a corner and then into a hole.
[47:57] I saw things around me I laid on the floor not being able to move I was overwhelmed and tired hard breath things around me felt bigger than usual, and I was faint.
[48:10] Begs for my mother to help me. She was with her boyfriend. She walked right past me. So I get this image, of course, of a woman, the mother stepping over the child who's going through a real mental health crisis, a moral crisis, perhaps, and just stepping over her child, walking right past me.
[48:30] Now, if the mother had boyfriends in between being married to her father, boyfriends are extremely dangerous to young girls on average, right? On average. So it's important to recognize and remember that the rate of abuse, sexual abuse in particular, is like 30 times higher when a non-related male is in the house with a young female. It's really terrible. I'm not saying anything happened here because I don't know, but the data, the statistics are not positive. She says, I was the wrong child of the family. my parents admit they didn't want me, nor never did, even if I've grown. Okay, so maybe she was born accidentally during one of these divorces or something like that. And yeah, saying to a kid, you don't want them is putting a lot of nihilism in them for sure. I'm always the one who sat out or sat in another room because they didn't want to interact with me at any point in time. Then I stayed in my room all day during the day and night and after and before school as well, right? So Isolation, isolation, isolation is really tough. We're social animals. We go crazy alone.
[49:46] She says, let me just finish up here. It doesn't help that school was a pain in my ass while getting teased and pushed around. I always got picked on for being out of pocket as if the quietness was out of pocket for them and just too odd or something. Teased and pushed around. So teased and pushed around, verbally attacked, marked. She also might not have been taught personal hygiene and pushed around. It could be physical violence. I always got picked on for being out of pocket, as if the quietness was out of pocket for them and just to order something. I moved schools. What's already happening? Picked on again, just not any worse. So everywhere, everywhere she goes, it's the same. I know this will happen anywhere and anytime in my life, but it's annoying. I'm starting to realize you will all die and perish and be forgotten in 20 years or less. Your family will think you are a disappointment as the hate I have for you now isn't enough. I want to hate to tear you apart but yet won't happen because you are the reason hate is a thing and will almost continue to be a thing.
[50:48] Again, I know this sounds like a word salad, maybe it is, but I think that there's some meaning in this, right? You will all die and perish, be forgotten in 20 years or less. So what that means is that because you live like an animal, you don't leave anything of lasting import in the world, and you're undifferentiated from others, right? So if you look at one rabbit versus another rabbit, they're kind of the same, just acting on instinct, you know, they eat, have sex, run from predators, and so on, right? So it is in the higher faculties that we are individuated, It is in thought and reason and morals and creativity that we are individuated. It is not in just acting like an animal, like everyone else, right? And of course, if everyone else around her is acting like an animal, then she feels like, okay, I can act like an animal, right? That there's no meaning, there's no morals, there's no virtue, there's no truth, there's no goodness, there's no higher goals, there's nothing of any of this, right? So you all die and be perished, right? So, you know, some rabbit gets eaten by a fox. Who cares, right? I mean, nobody really cares, right? So he says, your family will think you were a disappointment, as the hate I have for you now isn't enough. So again, this is self and other. This is self and other, this blurring of self and other. So if you can't blur, if you have this blurring between self and other, you cannot differentiate between self and other, then murder and suicide are in the same category. of obviously evil and horrible and corrupt.
[52:17] Murder and suicide are in the same category because...
[52:23] Self and other are undifferentiated. So your family will think you are a disappointment. So is that the other people or herself? As the hate I have for you now isn't enough. I want to hate to tear you apart, but yet won't happen because you are the reason hate is a thing and will always continue to be a thing. So hate is a thing, it's not a judgment. Hate is a judgment. Hate is a judgment. Hate is not a thing. A shadow is like a thing, right? Some inanimate object is a thing. So she's saying, I have been programmed like a computer to hate. I have no free will. Hate is a thing. Hate is not a choice. And if you choose to stay around hateful people, then you are choosing to feed your hate. If you choose to escape to better people, then you starve your hate and feed your love. She says, I am not hate. I am simply pointing this out. You and the system a lot will suck. Therefore, we need revolution. Nobody understands that, though. nor do people understand the fact that they probably sat next to me in class and never thought a single word about me, nor ever really thought to. I don't really care, though to be honest, nobody really has.
[53:30] Nobody. Nobody cares. Because caring, it's like she's amongst social animals, but without even the pair bond that social animals are supposed to have, right? That's a very strange thing. It's a very strange world to be in. so if you're around cats you don't expect cats to be herd animals because cats are solitary animals but you would expect dogs to have pair bonding so she's like well what kind of species am i i'm forced to be around people who have no pair bonding i'm not allowed to just be on my own i'm programmed to want to be with people but there's nobody around who connects with me, i am a social animal with no social life what am i.
[54:15] And then, she says, the wolf hunts its prey and continues life with no other bruises or scars, right? So this is the animal, right? She's living around people who are living like animals. There is no predator and prey anymore. It is all filth walking. There's nothing more with filth. It simply cannot die or make hunts real if only they want is value. Okay, so wolf hunts, so she's saying that the wolf hunts its prey. It's not It's not moral or immoral, it's just a wolf hunting its prey. So she's been treated as an outsider, right? So how do you create predators in society? Well, you force people to be around others and you show them no social connection whatsoever. Because social connection is how we bond with each other, right? This is why wolves help each other and hunt rabbits. There is no predator in prey anymore. It is all filth walking. There is nothing more with filth that simply cannot die or make hunts real if only they want is value so value is a moral judgment moral values.
[55:31] So, filth in her mind, I think, would be something like, she would not blame an animal, because an animal has no capacity for higher morality, but she will blame humans who can do better, and refuse to do better, and because she's surrounded by people who can do better, and refuse to do better, but simply indulge their darkest impulses, she will indulge her darkest impulses, she will be like them. And then she says, finally, one learns that boredom is a disease of civilization. And that's a quote. Finally, one learns that boredom is a disease of civilization. If you have the capacity, I mean, I remember when I first moved to Canada, we lived in Whitby, and with my half-uncle, he had a dog. And I remember hating to go to school. And I slept on a rickety couch in the basement and never got any sleep. And it was a pretty terrible time. And I remember the dog was just lying there in sunlight and didn't have to go to school. And I remember thinking, my gosh, wouldn't it be amazing to just be a dog, to be fed, to not have to go to school, get to lie around all day, to run and play and so on. That would be a wonderful life. What an amazing thing. So to yearn to be an animal.
[56:51] And animals don't really get bored. I mean, look at cats. They sleep like 18 hours a day, doze around. They don't really get bored that much, right? Now, boredom is when you have a capacity you're not exercising. You have a higher capacity you're not exercising. And maybe boredom is a disease of civilization. Why do people end up being corrupted by civilization a lot of times? Well, because civilization gives us enough wealth that we don't need each other.
[57:20] Civilization gives us enough wealth that we don't need each other in the same way that people say stuff on social media they'd never say in person because you get that kind of distance and safety and security and anonymity. So when we get wealthy, it's a big problem as a whole, right? When we get wealthy as a civilization, we don't need each other, especially if we have a welfare state and we can get money from the state, then we don't need each other. We can treat each other really badly. And this is sort of back to sort of dueling culture, right? Dueling culture made people pretty polite because there'd be big negative consequences for bad behavior. And now there are no negative consequences for bad behavior, which means everybody can self-indulge. We don't have to take care of each other. And then we strip ourselves of our higher capacities and our loyalty and so on.
[58:06] And so civilization produces the kind of wealth and security, both just and unjust that allows us to no longer need each other we get isolated we lose our higher faculties we lose our morality we lose our pair bonding we lose our teamwork we lose our purpose, and these kinds of horrors can often result so yeah please please take care of each other and please show, some really good behavior and you just will be absolutely astonished but you'll never know probably how many lives you can save All right. Well, thank you very much for listening. I hope this is helpful and interesting and take care. Bye-bye.
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