0:06 - Welcome to Friday Night Live
1:09 - Thoughts on Bitcoin
8:15 - Pandemic Potential
12:13 - Addiction to Violence
14:42 - The Role of Vaccination
17:56 - Economic Concerns
20:38 - Generational Disconnect
22:23 - Dating Advice
23:12 - Approaching Women
26:01 - Positive Interactions
27:30 - Building Confidence
29:37 - The Nature of Relationships
32:54 - Resentment and Forgiveness
39:54 - Abuser Dynamics
53:54 - Sympathy vs. Forgiveness
55:44 - The Nature of Forgiveness
59:14 - Enabling Corruption
1:06:05 - Trusting Yourself
1:14:09 - Self-Ownership
1:18:54 - Authority and Society
1:26:22 - Male Authority Dynamics
1:29:26 - Relationships and Authority
1:33:19 - Navigating Trust Issues
1:37:52 - Support for the Show
In this episode, we delve deep into the current state of the economy and the intertwining dynamics of social issues, with a particular focus on Bitcoin and its fluctuating landscape. We begin with a question from a listener about recent developments in the Bitcoin market, sparked by a significant hack of the Bybit exchange that rattled the crypto community. I share my thoughts on how the influx of big players has created a more stable market, observing that technological advances like automated trading scripts have altered how traders interact with price movements, leading to a stabilizing effect on Bitcoin's value.
The discussion naturally shifts towards the impact of societal issues, such as the recent discovery of a potentially pandemic-causing virus. I speculate on the broader implications of this news and whether global responses such as vaccine mandates were justified amidst growing pandemic fear. This prompts a conversation about the historical context of how governments have handled crises and whether solutions require confronting a society's fascination with control and authority.
Moving on, we explore the philosophical underpinnings of people’s addiction to violence and how that shapes the socio-political landscape. I assert that our societal penchant for coercive means to achieve seemingly virtuous ends, such as governmental intervention in education and healthcare, is a dangerous blindspot. This pivot illuminates a pattern where people are unwilling to face their complicity in perpetuating systems of oppression, not just for others but for themselves. The discussion dissects the often unexamined personal biases towards violence as a tool for achieving change.
As we navigate through listener comments and personal anecdotes, we tackle the contentious topic of relationships and self-ownership. Drawing on my own experiences, I highlight the importance of recognizing personal responsibility in romantic relationships and the pitfalls of projecting past traumas onto future encounters. This transitions into a profound dialogue about the nuances of forgiveness and resentment, particularly in familial relationships where childhood trauma can cloud adult interactions.
Listeners pose questions about dating and personal confidence, allowing me to share ideas on social interactions, especially regarding approaching potential partners. I demystify the process of initiating conversations with women, emphasizing the importance of non-verbal cues and mutual receptivity over overtly assertive tactics that often lead to rejection. This section serves not only as practical advice but also as an invitation for listeners to cultivate genuine connections through kindness and humor.
Towards the episode's conclusion, we engage with broader societal patterns regarding authority—particularly how the absence of stable male authority figures can impact young men today. I analyze the shifts in dynamics within schools and families, raising questions about the implications for relationship-building and personal agency in modern society. The intersection of these topics leads to discussions about gender roles, societal expectations, and how they evolve in a transforming economic context.
This episode is rich with a tapestry of insights and perspectives that challenge conventional wisdom while encouraging listeners to self-reflect on their roles within the societal constructs we navigate daily. Concluding on a note of empowerment, I reiterate the importance of personal agency and responsibility as we collectively face the complexities of modern life.
[0:00] Good evening, everybody. Welcome to your Friday Night Live. Lordy, lordy. More than two-thirds of the way through February.
[0:07] We are rocketing along. We are rocketing along in our 2025. All right. So, let's see here. Questions from the fine listeners. Please don't forget. Please, please, please. It's a short month. So, if you could help out the show at freedomain.com slash donate, I would deeply, humbly, and gratefully appreciate that.
[0:35] And right, Jeff writes, greeting Stef, any thoughts on Bitcoin lately? It looked like we were on track for a massive green candle today until two things happened. Bybit exchange got hacked to the tune of $1.4 billion. This was an Ethereum hack, but it spilled over into the broader crypto space. Reports of a new coronavirus with pandemic potential discovered at the Wuhan Institute of Virology. Yeah, did we need, did we need all these vaccines before mass migration? Did we?
[1:10] Was opening the trade routes to China worth it for the Black Death, killing a third of Europeans? I don't know, man. It's hard to say. Look, we've got Chinese food and covet i could do without covet even if i had to give up the occasional, bowl of dim sum no that's not that's not chinese uh orange chicken let's go with orange chicken.
[1:42] So what are my thoughts on bitcoin i mean i hate to sort of say it's exactly as i predicted but it is exactly as i predicted i said once the big players would move in the price was going to stabilize because now when it goes up you have automated selling when it goes down you have automated buying so you have and i i wrote this code this is my first programming job i wrote and debugged uh all of this code to buy and sell shares i know this stuff intimately like the back of my holy shit what's that i've noticed that before anyway so yeah you've got millions or billions of lines of code that are all seeking to optimize, right? Bitcoin goes up, people want to sell, Bitcoin goes down, people want to buy. So it's going to hover around this particular area until or unless there's some kind of breakout thing. As far as the not your keys, not your coins, well, that's just something that people are going to have to learn the hard way, right? That's just something people are going to have to learn the hard way. Well, it's like Javier Malay what was he promoting the Liberty coin seems to have been a bit of a pump and a dump.
[2:55] Boy, I've never seen that before. So my thoughts on Bitcoin, it's a stable store of value. It is obviously massively high compared to even a year or year and a half ago. And the breakout scenario is going to be tough. A breakout scenario from here is going to be tough because there's a lot of people who are long, a lot of people short, and it's just going to bounce around. And it has been bouncing around Canadian 133, 140, and a little higher, a little lower. It's going to take a real panic. You know, maybe, maybe if they lift the kimonos at Fort Knox, and as I talked about, I don't know, 10 or 15 years ago, there's no gold there. Although I think it was last verified in 2017, but it wouldn't surprise me if the squid fingers of the socialists had gone in there and caressed all of the gold out of the crevices of Fort Knox.
[3:53] So it's going to take some big shock and of course the regular economy is being given a certain amount of hope with doge and and the the cuts and so on right so uh the the astroturfed leftist propaganda machine to the tune of hundreds of billions of dollars in the west flowing into these leftist organizations. The mainstream media, if pharmaceutical ads are banned, as they are in just about every country, except I think America and New Zealand, if pharmaceutical ads are banned, people say, hey, man, it's a free speech issue, bro, that ship sailed a long time ago. That ship sailed a long time ago. Oh, free speech, free speech. Yeah, yeah, yeah. How about Hunter Biden laptop story, which would have switched or flipped the 2020 election? That's just mad. No, no, the free speech and then all the back door, shut this down, shut this down stuff. Uh, that, that ship has sailed. People screaming about free speech. That's long gone, right? It's long gone.
[5:00] So, it's going to take a certain panic. And if that panic manifests, then people will shift their assets and resources over to Bitcoin. You can see it heading over to gold, right? Like gold is at a huge high relative to even six months ago. So, people are looking for safe havens. There is this belief maybe that Doge is going to do something to resurrect the economy. And the big question about the economy at the moment is the people who have taken the buyouts from the government industries. What was it last? 60, 70,000 or something like that. So the theory is that you take them off government paychecks, you put them into the free market and instead of interfering with or taxing the flow of goods and services, they're actually contributing to the goods, to the flow of goods and services. But I, you know, I don't know, man. I don't know. There was a post the other day on X where somebody was saying, you know, I didn't realize how much government workers were hated. Like I didn't know. Because, you know, you're just in your little bubble and all of that. I just, I didn't know.
[6:12] Is anybody going to hire a fairly long-term bureaucrat who's been working for the government? I have my doubts, frankly. I have my doubts. Whether they join the economy, whether they don't join the economy, I don't know. It has a lot to do with that.
[6:33] So, yeah, Bitcoin, the real issue with Doge is that they are cutting off the fuel pipeline to the burning brain conflagration of leftist propaganda. So if that really takes a blow, if, say, people can get together and have speeches without astroturf leftist hysterics being paid to go and riot and so on. So if the propaganda diminishes, if the street violence diminishes, then there's a real potential for the economy. A real potential for the economy. And as the American economy does better, if it does better then funds will likely flow out of bitcoin into the economy as a whole.
[7:32] Which is you know maybe you lose some out of bitcoin but you gain something in lower inflation and like there's lots of ways to make money, right and so if there's a lot of deportations and if there are people who have to downsize because they lost their bullshit, cushy, fascist government jobs, quote, jobs, then real estate prices are going to go down. Now, what do you care if Bitcoin goes down 5 or 10 percent, but real estate prices go down 10 or 20 percent? Inflation could diminish. So you've got to not just look at Bitcoin. You've got to look at your entire economic picture to figure out whether you're doing well or badly.
[8:16] All right. Yeah, the coronavirus with pandemic potential. What, this is MERS? It's supposed to be more dangerous? Well, it would not at all shock me if right into Trump's term, right? I mean, this is the difficult thing, right? The difficult thing is, oh no, someone got elected that the elites don't like. Time to release the viruses. I mean, this is how brutal things are. Remember, we're just livestock to them. We're just livestock. So, yeah, it doesn't surprise me at all that they are releasing or talking about a new virus that's out with pandemic potential and so on, right?
[9:09] All right. So let's, uh, somebody says, hope you're doing well. Just wanted to check and see if it's okay with you. If I make some freedom in patches for a hat. Yeah. You can use the logo. Just, you know, don't, uh, don't mess with it. Don't change it. Hi, Stef. I just finished your novel, the God of atheists. And it was incredible. I read it in a few days. I was so absorbed and really loved the characters. The ending was amazing as well. Well, thank you. I appreciate that. It's a great book. It's a great book. It's actually the book that I was writing when I was wooing my wife, fiance, now girlfriend. So, it was great. Many right-leaning content creators blame the Enlightenment for many of the problems we see today. But are they right about that? They blame the Enlightenment. Oh, this is Voltaire's Bastards thing. Yeah, so, blame the Enlightenment for many of the problems we see today? No.
[10:05] No. It's not the Enlightenment. People will not confront their addiction to violence. It's all it fucking is. It's all it is. People will not confront their addiction to violence. And because they will not confront their addiction to violence, they will be let off the cliff, Pied Piper, Lemming style, over and over again until people actually look at their own dark heart, their own beast, the Satan within, the demon in the heart, if they look at and say, I am addicted to violence, and I will recoil and set aside my love of licking the sword of self-virtue while it disembowels the futures of my children. Until people confront their own addiction to violence, things will just get worse and worse. Well, I want roads. The only way to get it is violence. I want the children to be educated, and the only way to get that is violence. I want the sick to be taken care of and the poor to be taken care of, and the only way to get that is violence. Okay. I mean, we're not even at the stage in society where people are willing to admit that there's a problem with their addiction to violence.
[11:31] Well, I want to help people overseas. And the only answer is violence. People aren't even willing to admit that it's violence. That everything they ask the state to do is violence.
[11:55] So, people love hiding violence from themselves. And this really was the against me argument, was there to get people to wake up to their own cowardly addiction to violence.
[12:13] I mean, at least someone who's openly violent, it's immoral. But at least they're open about it, right? The guy who, like, is a mugger. He's like, yeah, I get stuff by threatening violence. Yeah, violence is good for me, right? I like it. That's what he would say, right? He's honest about it. But all of these, oh, just repulsive brain worms of like, well, I just care about the poor. I just want to help the sick. I just want roads. No. No. You just love violence. And why do you love violence? Because you were abused as a child and won't deal with it. Well, I was hit and I turned out better because of it. I'm a virtuous guy because I was hit. You can only have roads and education when people get threatened with guns and jail. So, I mean, if people in a cowardly fashion love violence and pretend that it's virtue, I don't see how the enlightenment is to blame for that.
[13:22] Until you can get people to tell the truth to themselves, you can't get them to do good in the world. Everything's just going to be manipulation and virtue signaling. I'm a good person because I support the use of violence under the guise of charity.
[13:41] I want to help the poor, you see, but I don't really want to go and help the poor. You know, they tend to be a little smelly, a little rambunctious, and often they have fleas, and they scratch themselves, and they have scabs that I'm not really sure where they come from, but I'm pretty sure I don't want them on me. And they tend to be rather insistent, and they tend to have baggy clothing with ill-defined lumps that I'm not sure are parts of their persons or illicit substances being kept in their waistband. So I really don't want to get to know the poor, but I'd really like the poor to be held. I want to do anything myself, really. I don't want to go and help the poor, help the poor. But I support selling off our children's futures for the pretense of helping the poor. I support a government agency that takes 90% of the profits of robbing the unborn, keep it for themselves, and then dangle just enough money over the poor to get them to continue to vote for socialism. Now, that's fine with me, but actually going and talking to a poor person and helping them, Oh, my God, you must be mad.
[14:39] I don't own a hazmat suit. I can't go down there.
[14:42] I mean, that's just how people are. They're just a bunch of pathological liars pretending to be good by disassembling their grandchildren and selling them off to parts, to foreign gangsters. Like, I mean, the debate about Ukraine. Ukraine has had a foreign legion forever. You can go and join. You can go join and fight. They'll take you.
[15:11] Anyway. All right. So, yeah, it's not the enlightenment. It's not the enlightenment. It's not the enlightenment. So, all right. So let's see here.
[15:30] Was it vaccination or sanitation that reduced the common childhood diseases? Well, I mean, you can see, and obviously I can see some value in vaccinations, but you can see that the prevalence of illnesses was going down considerably before the vaccinations. And you can't see a massive drop off. It wasn't like, oh, it's like staggering along and, you know, drops off like a cliff fall, right? So you can see these numbers. I mean, so one of the big challenges with vaccinations that people don't really talk about, like none of this is medical advice and I'm no doctor and no expert. So this is just an idiot's amateur opinion, right? So just.
[16:12] So, if you want to give someone immunity, let's just talk about not this mRNA freak show. We just talk about sort of traditional deactivated viruses or weakened viruses. If you want to give, you have to give people a big enough dose to ensure an immune system response. But if you give them a big enough dose, some people are going to get sick. You can't just give them one virus bit, right? And you, you know, so, so all of this is the case. Like they didn't want to miss any COVID cases, especially because they were being paid. The hospitals and doctors sometimes were being paid per COVID case. So they didn't want to miss any. So they did the spin cycle. They spun up the PCR test, which was never supposed to be diagnostic to like, you know, 39, 40, 38, 40. So, so they got every single COVID example and they got a whole bunch of false positives, right?
[17:12] So it's very tough to find the right thing, the right balance, right? If you don't give enough of a vaccine, then you don't stimulate an immune response. So you have to do more and more and more until you stimulate an immune response. But, you know, there's taller and shorter people. There's women and men obese and skinny. And so, you know, generally you have a standard dose, right? It's not calibrated usually per individual. So some people are going to get sick and some people aren't going to get until you aim for this middle thing but in this middle thing there's lots of it's too little or it's too much for some people.
[17:56] All right I'm pretty sure Orange Chicken is an American franchise original, what are your thoughts on the economy Stock market is freaking out. Companies aren't hiring, et cetera. Yeah, I mean, there's no economy, right? I mean, everybody knows that. There's no real economy. There's just momentum and debt. That's all there is. Like somebody posted not too long ago. This is Jennifer Harper Brown on X, right? Now, I don't know if this is true or not. I haven't obviously verified it. So she posted this a little while ago. She said, my husband and I were talking last night about how a 12 pack of drinks is $9 now and how in 2020, I used to buy them four for $10. I decided to go back into my Walmart app and see what I was paying for a random grocery order. In January 2020, I paid $7, sorry, $70.20 for 30 items. I added all of them to the card again and repurchased them today. Today, those 30 items were not $70.20, but $165.42. That's a $95.22 cent price increase in four years time.
[19:14] That is 135.6 inflation percentage. We can't go on living like this. I can't be the only one who feels this way. Now, I'm sorry, I'm not any kind of math guy, but let's see here. A 12 pack of drinks is $9 now. In 2020, I used to buy them four for $10. No, I think she has that reversed. I think it's four for $10 now, right? Which is what 250 but 12 pack of drinks nine dollars back in the day which would be like a buck 20 or buck 15 or something like that so i think she got them i think she got those reversed but yeah so the idea that i mean everything is just going up and up and up prices are just staggering and of course this is exactly what you would expect and what was i talked about years ago when it came to all the pandemic free money right there's free money well no free money You just pay for it with inflation. So I don't really think that there's an economy. Things are being propped up by IT and they're being propped up by some AI stuff, but there's no real economy at the moment. It's sort of like saying somebody's wealthy, even though they haven't worked in a couple of years and have run up their credit card debt, right?
[20:39] All right i was in a coffee shop overheard a postal worker grousing about people on the dole at a disconnect as well yeah i saw this woman she was complaining uh on i think it was tiktok about how she gave her 16 year old daughter 200 bucks for four days of travel with friends for her 16th birthday or something like that uh and that the daughter was using a credit card for food saying, no, no, I, you guys have to pay for my food, right? 200 bucks for four days used to be more than enough. I don't know that it's enough anymore, but it's just kind of funny. This woman was like, I think old teenagers have lost their minds. How, how dare they take extra money from us? It's like, have you looked at the national debt sister? Have you looked at the unfunded liabilities? How dare you complain that young people are financially irresponsible when you're birthing them to more than a million dollars worth of debt. Crazy.
[21:45] Hi, Stef. How are you? Good, thank you. First time catching a stream since it's late in Europe. It is kind of late in Europe, right? Anyways, I want to ask the following. What is a good way to overcome the fear of talking to women and asking them out on a date? Where would you recommend approaching women? Bars, discos, or events like dances, sports, etc.? Etc. So, would you like to tell me, or would you like me to tell you how to ask girls out? I have some experience in this.
[22:23] I have some experience in this, significant experience in this. And remember, I mean, I'm not a bad-looking guy, but I was balding since my, I don't know, early 20s or something like that, right? So, You know, I've had my drawbacks, I suppose you could say, although some women do like the bald look, which is why there are, like no men like the bald look, so there are no bald women, but some women like the bald look, so there are bald men. But I don't know if this is a big or common enough, I can tell you exactly how to do it. I've done it dozens and dozens and dozens of times over the course of my life. So hit me with a why, I don't want to waste time if people already know how to do it or don't need to do it, but I can tell you how to ask a girl out.
[23:12] All right not many people saying yes so maybe i'll do it separately maybe i'll do it separately, all right so.
[23:31] But yeah, it's not where you approach them, it's how you approach them. Yeah, okay, we got some yeses. Okay, so here's how you, it's not a matter of just gritting your teeth, walking up to and talking to women, that doesn't work. That doesn't work. You signal for receptivity, right? So you signal for receptivity, and then if the woman is receptive, you talk to her a little bit about non-dating stuff, and if she's still receptive, you talk to her about more and more stuff until you've talked to her for a while, and then you ask for her number. But you don't just go up and talk to a woman as a whole. So I'll give you an example from my own life. so many years ago, I was, um, when I was single, of course, I was, uh, picking up some food from a Thai restaurant that I'd ordered. And, uh, I saw this woman, very attractive woman, uh, uh, sitting and eating and she seemed to be on her own. And as I went into the restaurant, she looked up and I gave her a smile and she smiled back.
[24:52] So then she was sitting not too far from the cash register, so I made a couple of jokes with the person giving me the food, and I kind of glanced over, and she was smiling, which meant that she appreciated my sense of humor or something like that, right? So that's two things. So as you go in, and she's attractive, you give her a smile, and if she smiles back, then she's a basically friendly person, right? Doesn't mean that she's going to marry you, but she's, you know, reasonably positive and friendly. If she just gives you a sour look, then I wouldn't approach. Why would you? It's just no fun. And she may be in a bad mood. A dog might have just died, or she may have just broken up with some guy, or she may be being stood up by some guy she really wanted. So just, you know, don't impose, right?
[25:36] So then I took my food over, and I just said, oh, I'm eating alone. You're eating alone. Do you feel like eating alone together? And she's like, yeah, sit down, right? So then we just started chatting. So you need some indication or sign that the woman has a positive response to you in some way.
[26:01] But you don't just see an attractive woman go up and start talking to her, or a woman that you're attracted to, right? How you doing? But that's Italian, right? So he's just a player, right? So... You have to have some kind of positive response or interaction.
[26:33] So, I mean, you can stand at the Starbucks counter and there's a woman next to you and you just say, you just say, and it's not a flirting thing. It's not a dating thing. You could just say something like, man, do you ever have those days? You just kind of decide what you want to eat. And if she's like, no, then, you know, she's like negative or not interested or not positive or not receptive. That's fine. Obviously then, you know, move on with your day or whatever it is. Right. But if she says like, oh man, I have those every day. Right. So then there's some connection, there's some conversation that is occurring, and she's had at least a reasonably polite or pleasant response to something that you've said. Right? That's it. That's all it comes down to.
[27:22] I was in a coffee shop once, and a woman was talking about planning a birthday party for her niece.
[27:31] And, um, I said, uh, yeah, I actually dressed up as Barney the dinosaur for, uh, a family member's, uh, birthday party, uh, it was a lot of fun for the kids, but, you know, this, the, the, the Barney belly sauna hotbox was not particularly comfortable for me, so, anyway, so, and she found that amusing, or so we chatted, or whatever, and so, just have some sort of neutral interaction, like the same thing you might say to anyone right anyone you just have some contact some interaction and see if you get a reasonably pleasant or polite or positive response that's it, that's it.
[28:19] And if you get a positive response, if she says something else, right? I mean, I remember working out at a gym once, uh, and I'm, I'm on the reclining bike thing because that's, that's comfortable for me and I can also read or whatever it is. Right. And I remember that there was a woman sitting next to me and, uh, she was reading, I think it was a heartbreaking work of staggering genius, which is a pretty funny name for a book, not a great book. I did end up reading it. And I was like, I've heard of that. Ah, you know, I value my book time. Sorry to interrupt, but like, what do you think? Right. And if she's just like, it's fine. And then she goes back to reading, then okay. She's not particularly positive or friendly, at least towards you. And that's fine. But if she's like, yeah, it's taking a while to get started. And I'm like, oh, that's tough. Right. That's tough. You know, like it's, you've heard good things about it and we've all heard movies. Oh, you got to watch this movie. It's great. And you're like, I'm waiting, I'm waiting, I'm waiting. And you know, and then you get so much invested that you just have to finish it. Right. Or, and then you can say, I mean, do you ever get so invested even in a bad book? You just have to know how it ends. Like it's a documentary or something, but of course it's all just made up. And if she's like, oh yeah, I had that with this book. So you're away to the races, right. And you, you can chat, right. And that's it. So it's not, you don't go up and ask women out.
[29:38] You make a comment, you make an observation, you share a thought, you smile.
[29:45] And just so you do, like I smile at men and women, right? I'm just a smiley guy. I like a little bit of positivity and friendliness everywhere I can go in the world as a whole. I'll give people big smiles. My wife's the same way. She'll smile at everyone. And so just get used to being positive and friendly with people and get used to making little comments or little conversations with people so that it's not high stress or high tense so you're out of practice when you do it with a woman you find attractive, right?
[30:23] So I'll, you know, make jokes or little comments or chat with people. Obviously, I'm happily married, so I'm not interested in dating anyone. It could be an elderly Asian gentleman. It doesn't really matter. You know, you see someone with a kid there and it's like, oh, I love that age. I miss that age, you know? How old is she? You know, just a little bit, right? Just a little bit of chat. So you just get used to chatting with people and that way, and look, it's a nice little thing to do in the day. You know, a lot of people get stuck in their own head. They view the world as unfriendly, you know, a big smile and a positive comment and so on. It makes the world a little bit better. It makes the world, it's just a little bit better. It's a little bit, you know, sprinkles on the donut, right? So once you get used to, and you then end up with a more benevolent sense of the universe, Because for me, at least I find it's great. You know, I'm give people a smile and a little chat and a little conversation and so on. And yeah.
[31:18] You know, like if I, if I'm going to, to some place and, and I don't see the food that I want, I was like, okay, high stakes, high stakes. Do you have this particular food? Before you say no, please don't make a grown man cry. And I will like, I'm, I'm not saying I'll curl all the way up in a fetal position on the floor, but there will be waterworks and it will be quite passionate. And people will think that you've done me some grievous soul injury, as in fact you have by not having the food that I want. So, you know, just some goofy little whatever, whatever, right? Just some nonsense that you can say. And it's kind of nice. Makes people smile a little and makes it a little bit more enjoyable for them in their day.
[32:01] So just get used to, as you go through life, making little comments, a joke or two, if that's your kind of thing, just make little positive of statements and just get used to that. And that way, if there's an attractive woman and you make a comment, you're not like breaking out of your isolationist shell for one big flare gun of hope and opportunity, right? Just get used to in life going, this was your single in particular, just get used in life to going through and making a comment, giving somebody a smile and so on. Like if someone's having a difficult time with their kid, you can say, oh, I've been there, you know, just anything, just a little, little sort of human reach out, right? I'm not going to say reach around, just reach out. And when you get used to making those kinds of comments with people, which is nice, gets you out of your shell, then you see an attractive, a woman you're attracted to, then you're kind of used to it. You're in the vibe and you're just, you can say something, maybe she'll respond. Odds are she won't. She'd probably be kind of nice and polite.
[32:55] The more attractive she is, she's more likely to have RBS. So I probably won't be super positive, but you don't know. So I would say that just get used to chatting. Don't go up and ask women out, just go and make, uh, a, a comment, right?
[33:12] You know, uh, you're, you're at the grocery store and you want some peaches and there's some woman there and you can say, well, you ever have that thing where you, you want some peaches, but you're also concerned that you could load them into a BB gun and kill a goose at 50 paces. Cause they're so hard, you know, whatever, I don't know, whatever nonsense you can sort of come up with. Uh, because, uh, especially if you make a woman smile or laugh, I mean, that's, that's key, right? A man's humor has developed, is developed to woo women, which is why men tend to be a little funnier than women, right? So it's just evolution, right? So don't think about asking women out. Think about smiling, making a little bit of conversation, and just see what happens.
[33:53] And it doesn't matter where you go. Just, and you got to be in the habit of doing it. Otherwise, you'll be weird and awkward if you're only doing it with a woman. And the other thing too, like if you're chatting with a woman and you're sort of friendly and positive in the world, she's going to view that as a plus because that's a marker of self-confidence, benevolence, and success.
[34:18] Uh, somebody says, I look for the three pings. Eye contact, smile, open body language. All right. Johnny says, makes sense. I have to get better at reading the room. Now that I think of it, it's not a huge surprise that women I called approach reject me possibly because I haven't looked for a positive signal. Well, don't talk to a woman with the goal of getting her number. Talk to a woman just because you like sharing your thoughts and experience and, and, and jokes with people, right?
[34:50] Being able to read the room indicates being able to be present in the moment with yourself and others so ability to connect yeah yeah yeah sometimes it's better to chat with the elderly asian gentlemen some of the single were so the single women don't think they're trapped like if you start with them yeah for sure uh james says i've been doing this more and more being down in a city to meet people it's been very good for reducing the freeze learned response I had to do as a child. Yeah, honestly, most people are pretty nice, at least in the short run when you chat with them and so on, right? Most people are pretty nice, right? I mean, I've even been like some guy orders a frothy pink drink at a coffee shop and he reaches up to get it. I'm like, I appreciate a man who's confident enough in his masculinity to order that drink. That is really impressive. And you know, you get a smile, somebody to laugh a little, like just a little positive thing. It doesn't really matter what it is.
[35:52] Somebody says it highlights that you are confident and have a positive self-esteem as you are open to any outcome occurring and just want to focus on being present in the moment and the conversation at hand.
[36:09] So it shows the lack of fear. And, you know, women, equality women are drawn to the benevolent universe hypothesis, right? The benevolent universe hypothesis is people are generally friendly. People are generally nice. People are generally positive. And I view the social world as a benevolent place to be. And in general, as I go through life and, you know, James is here, right? I mean, you've, you've seen this a zillion times when we're out, like I'll make a little joke with someone or I'll make an observation or, or a compliment. My daughter's great at this. She's like, I love your nails, right? A little compliment. A little compliment is really, really nice. And there's, I mean, you, you can compliment people, males and females, right? It's not necessarily immediately flirty and that kind of stuff, but just, you know, a lot of people go through their day or their week or their month without anybody saying, well, great nails or whatever it is. That's some complicated, great hair. There's nothing wrong with that, especially if you just kind of move on, right? If you don't have an ulterior motive and so on, you just got to get used to bringing a positive experience to people's lives just about wherever you go.
[37:28] So it is a very positive and helpful thing to get used to. It does reprogram you. Yeah James says yes I've seen you do this live it's great to see yeah I mean my daughter is now over her embarrassment of that stuff and she'll kind of she'll kind of do it too, you know I went to go and pick something up from a store today they didn't have it on the way out I said to the cashier have a good one and just smile like it's not a cashier I'm going to ask out for, you know, any number of reasons, but just be positive and be friendly and go through life with the expectation of benevolence and connection and enjoyment, right? It almost never doesn't work.
[38:30] It almost never doesn't work. And you are reprogramming, especially if you've had, you know, like I had a tough childhood, but it reprograms you to the benevolent universe hypothesis. And it's true. I mean, it's one of the reasons I believe in voluntarism and a stateless society is that most people I meet are nice and helpful and friendly and positive. And you stop and ask them for directions. They're happy to help and, right? Just, you know, do little things, you know, do little things. Some old lady is getting groceries out of a car, offered to take them up to the house, right? Somebody drops something and make sure you run after them to give it back. You know, just every little thing that you do to create the positive universe hypothesis, not just in your mind, but in the mind of everyone as a whole. It's a really important thing to do in life, because it basically is a big, giant F you to the abusers. Nope, I'm not going to be paranoid. I'm not going to be jumpy. I'm not going to look at the world as a negative place. I am going to be friendly and positive.
[39:42] I joined a new company a few months ago and I've only had one bad customer out of thousands. Everyone is friendly and kind. Yeah. Yes, yes, yes. All right, Stef.
[39:54] Jesse Lee Peterson, the great Reverend Jesse Lee Peterson, talks about dropping resentment towards our mothers. He says, forgiveness is not really possible, but dropping resentment is. Have you dropped the resentment? When I told my mother I didn't resent her anymore, she stopped all communication with me. I got worried about my inheritance, so I resented her again, and she communicated with me again. People really do feed off hate. Interesting. I'm not sure I quite get the whole flow and process. Have I dropped my resentment towards my mother?
[40:25] I, I will ask you guys. Uh, I will ask you guys. Uh, I mean, you've heard me talk about my mother. Um, you know, I have a very happy marriage. You've heard my relationship with my daughter and so on. Uh, hit me with a Y if you think I have little to no resentment or residual resentment towards my mother. Hit me with a Y if that is the case. Hit me with an N if you think I still hang on to seething subterranean resentment towards my my mother i will put this out, so yes if i've overcome my resentment to the most part and n if you think that i still have it bubbling away like a volcano in there somewhere deep down all right dylan says no everyone else says yes you have overcome your resentment sapanta says no you still have your resentment so most people are saying yes i've overcome it and a few people are saying no i haven't small n okay so what to me would be sorry what to you for those of you who said that i still have subterranean seething resentment towards my mother what what is your indication of that.
[41:50] What is your indication that I have, because we're an empiricist here, right? So, what is the behavior that I manifest that gives you the perception or the belief that I have a seething subterranean resentment towards my mother what what have i done or said that and this is not like you got to prove it i'm just just genuinely curious what is it that, all right so what are people saying small n somebody says i don't know resentment means to be indignant at uh i also want to add i don't imagine you're thinking about it all the time I mean, but I don't imagine you're thinking about it all the time. Well, nobody thinks about anything all the time, right? You go to sleep, you run everywhere, you get distracted. So I'm not sure what it means to not be thinking about something all the time. That would be impossible no matter what.
[43:01] So somebody says, your daughter has no contact with her. So are you saying that the only way that i would manifest not resenting my mother would be to expose my innocent daughter to an unrepentant child abuser not sure i quite follow that logic, i'm not i'm not quite sure so i am full of seething resentment towards my mother because I don't expose my daughter to an unrepentant child abuser.
[43:39] I'm happy to hear how that works, but I'm not quite sure I follow. Somebody says, I would think it is more a sadness. Okay. Is it useful to hang on to a little resentment as a form of self-protection? I don't need self-protection for my mother because I don't talk to her. Why would I need self-protection? That's like saying, well, you know, I live in the same town where there's a zoo. So I've got to carry protection against tiger attacks. It's like, well, but they're in the zoo cage. Let's see here. I might word this wrong, says someone, but it makes me think of a show you did where you said you can have sympathy for what caused her to be terrible, but we don't have to forgive them for what they did to us. You've mentioned often that she's done a lot of harm to you. I'm not sure if that harm she's done can be forgiven. But that's moving the goalposts. This wasn't a conversation about forgiveness. This is a conversation about resentment.
[44:50] So I'm not sure why you're talking about forgiveness when we're talking about resentment. If there's a connection or causality there, I don't follow it. So if you can just don't change the terms without making the connection, right? If we're talking about resentment and you say, well, but your forgiveness, it's like, well, you then have to connect the two, right? It depends on your definition of resentment. Forgiveness hasn't happened as far as I know. You seem comfortable and healthy in your current situation, so I don't see a need for correction. Sorry, I don't quite understand. Forgiveness hasn't happened. How does forgiveness happen? I don't quite follow that. It's like saying a paycheck for me hasn't happened yet a paycheck hasn't happened.
[45:49] Forgiveness is not mine to make or will or happen. Forgiveness is for the other person to earn. I mean, you don't just, a paycheck doesn't just happen. You go and you contract and you earn your pay. And because you've earned your pay, people pay you. It doesn't just, it doesn't happen. Pay, paycheck doesn't happen, if that makes sense. So I'm not quite sure I followed that one either, but I'm happy to be schooled. Honestly, I reckon I can't explain why I would say you still have resentment. Well if you think that i have resentment but you don't know why it could be projection like you're thinking well if i were in Stef's shoes i'd really resent someone but that's not good right you can't have relationships if you project very well right somebody says i don't experience you as having resentment you've said a number of times you don't take it personally because regardless of who it was your mother would have been who she is to them as well this is how i know i still have some resentment to work through because I still take certain things personally.
[46:52] So resentment tends to be anger plus helplessness. The slave resents the master. The slave resents the work that he has assigned. We resent how boring school is. We resent homework because it is anger plus helplessness. Does that seem like a reasonable definition or approach to the issue of resentment.
[47:20] It is anger plus helplessness combines to produce the magical potion called resentment. Right. So in what way, so I would have to be angry at my mother and helpless with regards to my mother. So let's start with the latter. How am I helpless with regards to my mother, with regards to my relationship with my mother? Now, please don't tell me, well, you're helpless to fix and change her, because that's true of everyone, right? That's true of everyone. We're all helpless to fix and change, et cetera. So, and this is, I really, I love this conversation. I'm really, really keen to have it. And I'm very happy to get feedback on this. And of course, to be corrected if I'm doing something unjust or wrong. So in what way am I helpless with regards to my mother? and remember helplessness is not being able to magically change her because that's not possible to anyone, in what way am I helpless with regards to my mother.
[48:38] So the opposite of Christ no no no Christ Christ talks about forgiveness is earned yeah God talks about forgiveness is earned you have to apologize, you have to make restitution, you have to make people whole. Jesus is not blind forgiveness to everyone, no matter what.
[49:01] Don't use Christ to manipulate people into consorting with evildoers. Don't do it, man. That's just about us. That's really corrupt. That's really corrupt. To wield the suffering of Jesus, to try and convince, threaten, and bully people into consorting with evildoers, because Lord knows Jesus didn't. All right. Somebody says, I accept my parents did not raise me as they should. Okay. I accept that my parents did not raise me as they should. I'm not sure what that means. I regret that they were not better. I know now what they should have done. I won't hang on to hate. I choose not to stew in resentment or hate of them. I reject their choices in how they failed to raise me. No apology, no amends made. But that is my choice. I also have to work on not making excuses for them. They could have done better if they cared enough to try.
[50:08] I got to tell you, that's a little manipulative, I think. I won't hang on to hate. I choose not to stew in resentment or hate of them. And it's like, so then you're just great. Like you're great. And everybody who has anger or residual hatred or whatever is just stewing in hate and hanging on to hate. I, I, this manipulative as hell, man. I got to tell you straight up, right? There's a process, right? I mean, there's a whole process of working through having been betrayed and abused by parents or other adult authority figures. There's a whole process. And there are times when you will hate, and there are times when you're angry. There are times when you'll cry. There's times when you'll laugh about it and shake your head. So I don't like it in particular. You know, maybe I'm wrong about this, but I don't like it in particular. It's like, I won't hang on to hate. I choose not to stew in resentment or hate. It's like maybe now hate is certainly part of the process you have to hate how they abused you in order to get some boundaries and distance.
[51:07] Uh somebody says you're right Stef this is more so projection on my end i'm sorry about that no that's fine that's fine i appreciate that uh dylan says explaining it like that makes a lot of sense this is going to be a good convo is this a topic christians want to understand okay that's this is a red herring. We're not talking about what Christians may or may not understand or what all the billions of Christians in the world do or don't want to do. That's like not an argument or not a, that's just a red herring. Yeah, I wouldn't say you're helpless at all. You have said many times that she can contact you in an attempt for restitution. Your door is always open for an honest conversation in this regard. Yeah. Yeah. Forgiveness is given, not earned. Hopefully someone worthy of it will be granted it by the victim party. It is solely determined by the victim. It's not an argument. You're just saying things. Forgiveness is given, not earned.
[52:03] Well, is it better to apologize if you wrong someone or not? Is there a moral difference between someone who hurt you, not by accident, right? Like they hurt you deliberately, right? They deliberately hurt you. Is it better for someone to apologize or is it better for them to gaslight you, minimize, say it never happened, say it was your fault and continue to abuse you in that way. Is it better to apologize if you've deliberately hurt someone or is it better to blame them for being hurt and to gaslight them and say it was their fault or it never happened, right? Now, to ask the question is to answer it. Of course, it's better to apologize if you've hurt someone. And therefore, you have to have a more positive regard, if you're just and moral, to someone who apologizes, makes restitution, and then finds ways to virtually guarantee it's not going to happen again. You're going to have a more positive regard for someone who apologizes and makes restitution than somebody who gaslights you and says, it's your fault, it never happened, and you brought it on yourself.
[53:21] So somebody who earns our forgiveness has a more just claim to our positive response than somebody who continues to abuse us this is not complicated.
[53:39] We have to bear in mind you use your relationship with your mother often to point things out with suggesting context you're probably not resentful.
[53:55] Uh, is it possible, Stef, to have sympathy for our abusers, but not forgive and condone the behavior? Oh, my mother's life is terrible and has been for decades. My mother's life is, I wouldn't even shatter your hearts by telling you what my mother's life is like. It's terrible. I absolutely wish she had made different decisions. I absolutely wish she had humbled herself and gone to therapy or gone to anger management. I absolutely wish she had made better choices. It's very sad the way that her life has turned out. Really sad. You know, if we have a father who's an alcoholic and we beg them for decades to stop drinking, to get help, to go to rehab, and they just refused and yelled at us and threw bottles at us and put their fists through the wall and so on. And then, you know, they take three years to die, of liver disease. That's sad. And we hear a tale of them dying of cirrhosis of the liver or whatever. That's terrible. We wish they had made better choices. We wish they had made better decisions.
[55:22] But we can't change what they've done, obviously, so. Excuse me. So, I think unearned forgiveness can be synonymous with a lack of resentment.
[55:45] Well, unless you're really fucked up, you can't get a boner for an Egyptian mummy. You cannot will a boner to dip your dick into desiccated dust. 3,000 years dead. You can't will that. You can't will it. You can't will your stomach to digest gravel. You can't will your tongue to find a lemon, sweet and cheesecake sour you can't will these things, so the idea that you can will forgiveness is a fantasy it's mad.
[56:29] The operation of your instinctual ethical organs is not under your control and it is grandiose and delusional to imagine otherwise. I can just will forgiveness. No, you can't. And the devil tells you to do that because the devil wants those who do evil to suffer no negative consequences and not have to change their course. If you offer forgiveness to people who have not earned it, you are collaborating and colluding with all the evil they've done and you are now mixed in and partly responsible for all the evil they're going to do. It's corrupt beyond words. It is corrupt beyond words.
[57:19] The devil wants those in his grasp to continue to do evil.
[57:32] God, virtue, the conscience, wants them to stop doing evil and hopefully start doing good. Now, if you give people forgiveness who are continuing to do evil, You are withholding from them the discomfort they need to change. You are colluding and collaborating with the evil they do. You are a getaway driver for their crimes, and your morals and conscience is now mixed in on all the evils they do in the future.
[58:10] If you bring an alcoholic his drink and his car keys you are now mixed in with the kid he mows down while drunk driving, Unknown forgiveness is a tool of the devil to withhold the negative feedback people need to course correct from a path of evil You are a sucker and a tool of evildoers. What is all evil is the thirst to enforce the unearned. You have a serious morality problem, and you are a slave and tool of corruption if you command as a moral absolute the willing of forgiveness to those who have not accepted that they did anything wrong.
[59:14] You are an enabler of corruption when you command people to provide forgiveness which has not been earned. You are eliminating the negative feedback that is needed for people to change course as they careen towards the cliff edge of hell itself. It's monstrous. It's monstrous. You are an appeaser and enslaved by the corrupt. To command others to try to wreck their conscience and true emotional selves to provide a positive good called forgiveness to those who continue to abuse them.
[1:00:10] Yeah, cirrhosis is a nasty way to pass. Cirrhosis and lung cancer, right? Your mother blamed you for her abuse. I'm very sorry if I missed that in previous streams. Obviously, I never saw her as a saint, but if she actively blames you, then I now have very little sympathy. Well, when I was a child, my mother said she hit me because I was bad, and when I got older, she said she hit me because the doctors poisoned her, and she lost her mind. That's a typical, right, as you get older, the lies that were told to you as a child fall away from you, and therefore new lies have to take their place. But I'm curious, Code Blue, I'm genuinely curious. Are you saying that.
[1:01:10] Are you saying that someone who's a parent can abuse a child without saying to that child, you caused this by your bad behavior? I mean, can you imagine a parent saying, well, you didn't do anything wrong. I'm just in a bad mood, so I'm going to beat you. I have never, I mean, I've had thousands of conversations with people about their childhoods. My brain and this show is a repository of some of the deepest public dives into human consciousness that exists on the planet. And I've never once in the thousands of conversations I've had with people over the last many decades, I've never once heard a parent who is abusive. I never heard reports of a parent who's abusive saying to the child, yeah, hold still. I'm going to beat you up. No, you didn't do anything. I'm just in a bad mood. I'm just, you know, my boss yelled at me. I stubbed my toe. I didn't win the lottery and it's nothing to do with you, just be my punching bag. Like that doesn't happen. All abusers blame their victims because if they can't blame their victims, they can't abuse anymore. The abuse is blaming the victim always.
[1:02:26] So if you're saying, well, I don't have much sympathy for your mother if she blamed you for her abuse, you're creating this false dichotomy wherein there are some parents who don't blame children for abusing them. But parents always blame children for abusing them. Always, always, always, always. Somebody says, I can't undo the past. I accept it happened.
[1:02:57] They never acknowledged it. No apology from dad before he died. Mom cut off contact. So I'll tell you what tells me, rightly or wrongly, this is what I absorb. When people say things like, I can't undo the past, that is a statement of dissociation. Nobody believes that you can. Why would you say that? while I don't have a time-traveling machine to go back and rewire my parents' brains from 30 years ago. Who would ever suggest that that's even remotely possible, that technology exists, and even if you went back in time, you'd just be hanging in space because the world is in a different place now in terms of the solar system and the galaxy. So when people say, I can't undo the past, you know it's just like parents who are you know you have the confrontation with abusive parents say well we can't change the past you can't change the past it's like it's annoying because it's of course i mean nobody's suggesting nobody's suggesting that you can change the past, nobody's suggesting that you can can undo the past so this is a statement to me of dissociation.
[1:04:22] At what point do you know you can fully trust yourself and your judgments? Yeah, that day will never come. Yeah, that day will never come. That's why, I mean, can you imagine saying to a scientist, at what point do you know that your hypothesis is just true without having to test it? Well, never. You will never fully trust yourself and your judgments. And that's by design. When I first learned how to walk, which I actually remember learning, when I first learned how to walk, I didn't trust that I could stay vertical, right? Now I trust that I can stay vertical, but now I'm dealing with more complex judgments and decisions. So as soon as you get comfortable with something, you're supposed to move the goalposts and get uncomfortable again, right? Fully trust yourself and your judgment? You can't. That's why you need people around you who love you. That's why you need philosophy. That's why you need feedback. Life for unrepentant child abusers is a destitute one. They keep themselves in a prison of unforgiveness. I wouldn't wish it on anyone.
[1:05:41] And I get, I'm sure I've used this phrase myself, and I'm really trying to be sort of alerts to this, I wouldn't wish it on anyone. You can't wish it on anyone. You can't wish the consequences of free will on or off anyone. So I know, and I'm sorry to be nitpicking, but these kind of NPC statements, you've really got to watch them because usually NPC statements are markers of dissociation.
[1:06:06] What helped you fully trust yourself after years of betraying yourself? Sorry i.e. making choices that go against our true selves interesting.
[1:06:31] In what way was I betraying myself? I mean, I think I know what you might be talking about. By the way, if you find this conversation helpful and useful, and you know there's no other place that talks about things in this way, and you know how powerful and deep this is, please, freedomain.com slash donate. Please, please help out the show, or you can donate on the app on Rumble or on Locals here. But yeah, freedomain.com slash donate.
[1:06:54] So I think it took me a long time to learn to live philosophy rather than talk about it. I was talking about it, and I spent a lot of time trying to convince other people to be philosophical so that I could improve the relationships. And it was only after many years that I finally realized that people weren't going to be philosophical, and I had to make my choice. But I'm not sure I would look back over my life and say, I spent years betraying myself. Now, again, maybe I've missed something, and I'm certainly happy to be corrected on this. I'm not offended, obviously, but after years of betraying yourself and i don't fully trust myself that's why i need principles but i'm certainly happy to hear how i betrayed myself for years so all right uh somebody says my father grew up around a violent aggressive woman who drank herself to death smoked like a chimney and would have screaming matches with her husband some details of which i heard about years later. Yeah, I had a pretty horrible childhood, but he abused me and made excuses when I confronted him. If you had a bad childhood, everyone thinks like if you have a bad childhood, that excuses you from inflicting a bad childhood on your own children. It's like, nope, you're more responsible for giving your children a good childhood when you've had a bad childhood.
[1:08:11] That's well put, Stef, about willful forgiveness. It's so frustrating that Christians don't understand that. Yeah, God does just forgive everyone and take everyone into heaven. You have to repent. And my parents always laid the blame on me for my abuse as well. Yeah, of course. It's no abuse without blaming the victim. Much sympathy for you, Stef. I had some bad times as a child. I'm sorry to hear that. Had good times too, but that doesn't excuse the abuse. Being verbally attacked all day until I exploded, then being given the strap from dad for talking back. I'm so sorry. The major purpose of abuse is to put you in no-win situations. Right and and i i will fight halfway to mania to avoid no win situations, right like the de-platforming i need to tell the truth about important issues i can't tell the truth about important issues well fuck that i'm just going to tell the truth like i will not be put in impossible situations i won't do it i will not be put in impossible I impossible situations are like waking death.
[1:09:22] So, here, being verbally attacked until you finally fight back and then be given the strap, that's an impossible situation. Do I keep just eating all of this horrendous, acidic verbal abuse, or do I fight back and get the strap, right? Impossible situations, right? I've mentioned this. My mother used to do this all the time. Schools do this all the time, too. My mother would give me complicated, convoluted instructions. I wouldn't be sure exactly what to do. Bosses do this kind of stuff, too, right? I wasn't really sure what to do, and so I'd ask for clarifications. Like, I already told you. Just go do it. And then you'd go do it, because it would be complicated and confusing, I'd get something, quote, wrong. I'd say, well, why didn't you do it the way I told you to? Well, I thought, no, no, don't think. It's just impossible, right? There is a special kind of sadism and very, very deep layers of an all-burning, all-consuming hell for people who put children in impossible situations. I mean, I remember reading this book about anorexia. I don't know why the hell I was reading a book about anorexia. But in this book around anorexia, there was this woman, why does she stop eating? Because she was late for math class, she was halfway to the math class, and she realized she'd left her book in her locker.
[1:10:33] Now, if she went back to get her book, she'd be even more late for the math class and would get in trouble. If she went to the math class without her textbook, she would be in trouble. So she just sank against the wall and kind of had a mental collapse. There's no win. Can't win. Schools do this all the time. You're bored. It's incredibly boring, but you have to pay attention. I'm going to be incredibly boring and I'm going to scream at you for appearing to be distracted. Thank you, noble-hearted. I appreciate that tip.
[1:11:25] Ayn Rand sort of stuff, your engagement with your ex, when you were friends with people who didn't have your best interest at heart, etc. Ayn Rand sort of stuff, I don't view my engagement with my ex as betrayal, self-betrayal. Everybody was encouraging me, everybody was saying it was great, and I didn't have anyone in my side. And so I was doing, you know, the best I could with the knowledge I had, and that was limited. And I don't view that as a betrayal. I think if I had gotten married, had kids, and it had been a terrible, but negative environment, I think that would have been bad. But as soon as I, man, as soon as I got better information, I was out of there. As soon as a friend of mine's girlfriend said, you think somebody who would, who was engaged would be happier? And like, that's all I need. I just needed someone. And like, for me to pull out of a lengthy relationship and out of an engagement and return the ring and move out and like, oh, because somebody like that, I just needed one little comment. That's all. And like one little comment just turned it all around. So I wouldn't, you know, I was obviously hungry for something like that unconsciously.
[1:12:41] All right. Since we are on the topic, how do you get over resentfulness for an ex-girlfriend or boyfriend, please? Well, to blame others is to hold yourself unaccountable, which gives you the helplessness factor that is required for resentment. Remember, anger plus helplessness is resentment. So if you feel like you were the victim of an ex-boyfriend or girlfriend, that they just did bad things to you, you had no protection, no choice, and you had no agency in the matter, then you feel anger and helplessness. And then you are resentful. You are responsible for all of your relationships. And you can't hold yourself responsible without attacking yourself. The reason you hold yourself responsible is so that you can make better choices in the future. I was responsible for being in a relationship and getting engaged, and I was responsible for leaving that relationship and moving on. When I was in business relationships that I viewed as not ideal, I was responsible 100% for being in those relationships.
[1:14:09] All right. Um, so you, you, you just 150% self-ownership. But of course, if you feel like, well, I'm responsible for bad decisions, therefore I betrayed myself. Well then that's two higher stakes, right? I'm too, that's just two high stakes, right? Awesome show. Thank you. Somebody says, uh, thank you for the tip. Somebody says patriarchy settled in Western Europe and East Asia. Coincidentally, that's where the highest IQs are, any correlation. I think it's correlation, but I think it's causation. So when food is plentiful and the weather is good year round, you don't need men to raise your kids.
[1:14:57] So you don't need a patriarchy, right? And our selected societies tend to be more matriarchal, right?
[1:15:08] So when food is scarce and the weather is highly uncertain, then you need men to raise your kids. And when food is scarce and weather is highly uncertain, you need higher IQ to prepare for winter and to store things up and to do the right thing with regards to, you know, preservation and hunting. You're like, you need all of that stuff, right? So I think it is those two factors, in particular scarce food and wild variations in weather, that produce both patriarchal societies, because women desperately need men in order to survive and for their children to survive, and also drive the higher IQ because the people who, you know, grasshopper versus the ant, the people who fail to prepare for a winter, will often end up not doing particularly.
[1:15:58] Well, to put it mildly. So there is a pressure to be better at planning and to defer gratification more. And the same pressure is there to have more of a patriarchal society. And this is why, you know, when we have the welfare state, we have a move to the matriarchy, right? So I think, I think a lot of people are like, well, why aren't men, why aren't young men asking young women out? And that's because most young, okay, let me, let me ask you this. Let me ask you this let's let's go straight straight to this so um if you're under the age of 40 i mean let's just throw it wide open any anybody who wants to answer this so when you were growing up, the younger the better but if you were growing when you were growing up.
[1:16:44] How much male authority did you see? Male authority, which means men got their way, men enforced their standards, men were able to call people out. How much male authority did you see in school, at home, among friends, families? How much? And I don't mean male violence. I'm not talking about male authority. How much male authority did you see? how many men did you see who had genuine authority and we can talk about the christian biblical whether women defer to them and so on but male authority very very little 0.5 almost nine men were subversive to females you mean subjugated i think two females none after 1980 80, yeah, yeah, like three, all women, daycare, teachers, yeah, voters, and so on, right? So most young men are growing up, and it doesn't matter whether you're in the public school, private school, homeschool, doesn't really matter, but young men are growing up, and they're not seeing male authority. Now, male authority without restraint tends to be fascism, female authority without restraint tends to be communism. They're both totalitarian because we need balance.
[1:18:09] So young men are growing up seeing bossy women dominate. Now, this doesn't mean that all women are bossy, of course, right? But it does mean that the bossy women tend to dominate because the only thing that tends to restrain bossy Karen women is male authority, just in the same way that, you know, a male aggression tends to be restrained by a female nature. So, let me just get your feedback here.
[1:18:49] 48 or 49 next month, very much. I'm not sure what very much means. I'm 28, none. I saw no male authorities.
[1:18:55] It is like the stereotype of husbands with a beer body, watching TV, and wives annoyed at their husbands versus having a strong, respectable husband. I had a male principal and a few male teachers, but that was the late 80s. And did the male teachers, and the fact that there were men around doesn't mean that they had authority. So I'm looking for male authority not male presence the word authority is important there, somebody says I didn't see a male teacher until the eighth grade and he probably was a porn addict because he flirted with the girls in class oh yeah yeah I saw no male authority church raised homeschooled public schools male quote heads were pussy whiffed by their wives I'm 28, a noticeable man in the 80s much less in subsequent decades men were mostly authority figures in my early childhood thankfully I don't think it's normal nowadays unfortunately yeah, The bossy, naggy women at church and school were like the alpha males, you know, the ones with voices that hurt the ears. Yeah. The women who were just willing to escalate to get their way. Most teachers female, but many men still there, but most of the, sorry, many teachers female, but many men still there, but most at the time, men over 40, principals men, bosses men. Father always said, kiss your mother or wife's ass. Yeah. You know, this nonsense, happy wife, happy life. happy wife, happy life slavery.
[1:20:18] Slavery yeah it's terrible it's terrible terrible stuff so when you raise boys.
[1:20:32] To when you raise boys with no male authority figures to, then you kill the birth rate. Because why would young men sign up to be subjugated?
[1:20:53] Why? Why would men, young men, why would they sign up to be subjugated? Yeah. A lot of white guys are going outside their race to try and find submissive women. Yeah, well, that's a, kind of a, uh, a mirage as a whole, right? I mean, there are, there are some cultures or ethnicities where they'll pretend to be quote, submissive or whatever it is, then, uh, then it changes, right? It changes.
[1:21:36] Okay, let me ask you this. Let me ask you this. When you were growing up, or let's say even now, when was the last time you saw a strong man, win against an aggressive woman? Let me ask this. How many times in the course of your life have you seen a strong man, win in a conflict with an aggressive woman and i'm just talking like verbal and authority and, and people take his side because he's the more reasonable one and the woman is either ostracized or backs down or is uh or is um i would say i would say beaten but but And the man comes out with his way, right? It could be in an HOA, it could be in a school, it could be in the home, it could be in the church. How, no, no, that you've seen, that you've seen, not, sorry, I should be more clear, not in a movie, not in a, not Trump, not, how many times have you seen a strong man win against an irrational, aggressive, escalating female?
[1:23:05] So people are saying, never. No, not Donald Trump included. Sorry, that was on me. Man, I don't remember that happening. Can't think of any, not in my life. No, only handling crazy customers. Zero, zero. I'm drawing blanks. And that would be a wonderful site. I can't remember the last time, if ever, slim to none. So there's a pretty creepy movie called, uh, American Beauty. And in it, there's a guy who decides to stand up to his bitchy wife. I rule, right? He goes and buys a sports car. And I just remember like jaw dropping, right? It was, uh, Kevin Spacey, right? So I, and, and he, he, he stands up against his bitchy wife and does what he wants. And then she kills him. Spoiler. Sorry. The movie's like 30 years old or whatever. Right. And she kills him. Oh, he's going to die or whatever it is, right? No, does she kill him? No, she's going to kill him, but he dies for some reason, right?
[1:24:10] So, yeah, women just escalate using the state. They have the big red button in all conflicts. Well, or HR or tears or they're upset or they, you know, online, they summon the simp army by being upset and so on, right? So, yeah, I just, have you seen, like, I don't, With my mother, I don't remember any assertive man being able to win or even win-win in any conflict with her because she would just escalate if she had any power, right? She might subjugate, but that wasn't him winning. That was just her subjugating because she needed or wanted something. But I don't remember that. Yeah, I'm trying to think of people in my personal life. Oh, yeah, the closeted gay Marine next door kills him, right? But the woman's going to kill him too. And she's got a gun or something like that, if I remember it. Yeah, you are some small examples online, but that's because it's really rare. I don't know what that means. So my mother would pack her bags and my dad would fold like cards. Yeah. Yeah.
[1:25:21] So, I mean, this is why people will no longer believe the lie of women, the empathetic sex. Like they just, this is, this all gone for better or for worse, right? That's all gone. I did see Taming of the Shrew with Richard Burton and Elizabeth Taylor but that was before the state, well the 1960s Taming of the Shrew of course as you know is 16th century Shakespeare the state and the culture funded by the state underpins women's approach to their interactions with men yeah, yeah, I'll tell the stories someday day, not today, but I'll tell the story someday.
[1:26:09] So, yeah, who wins? Who can come out on top against dysfunctional, aggressive women? Which man can come out on top?
[1:26:22] It really doesn't happen. And this is one of the reasons for the declining, really collapsing birth rates.
[1:26:35] Why would men sign up to subjugation? So in the past, maybe it was sex drive, maybe that's handled with pornography. See, get it handled. But, or, men are drawn to games where the rules of engagement are fair. Which is why video games, online video games in particular, are very big for men, right? Let's go back to Sean Connery. Sean Connery. We talk about this kind of stuff, right? So, if a man has no authority, if a man has no authority, he will avoid the situation. Men are drawn to games where the rules are objective and can be enforced. And the rules between men and women are not objective and cannot be enforced, except by women.
[1:27:58] So, this is important to think about. So, this has really been sort of ground into your consciousness and your nuts and spine and bowels, right? Men can't win against women. Men can't win against women. Men can't win against women. Now, if men can't win against women, Nobody wins. Women don't win because women are getting, as they get more power through the state and power corrupts, right? So as women get more power through the agency of the state, then women end up more and more corrupt, less and less happy, more and more miserable. And you can see this, right? As women have gained power and power is really having other people pay for your own bad choices. That's really what power is about, right? So as women have gotten more and more power, they've gotten more and more miserable and more and more single. and so on, right? Stef, you did a great job on your debate with the woman on abortion. I felt she came out a little aggressive, and you handled it well. Yeah, no, I had to check that, yeah, for sure.
[1:29:27] That's one of the best things about being in a relationship with men you can always make an appeal to reason it must be so hard to be in a relationship when you can't do that, well in terms of more divorces to fewer divorces it's lesbians men and women and men and men So the more women you have in a relationship, the more breakups and divorces, right? Why do you think women want to come out on top and don't like male authority figures? Well, because women, like most of us, right? Women want to escape negative consequences of bad choices. And the only way they can do that is by rebelling against male authority.
[1:30:11] Yeah. And women think that subjugating themselves to male authority is enslavement, but then they never think that for men having to subjugate themselves to female authority is also enslavement. And this is why the myth of the empathetic sex is gone. Like, it's never coming back. And and i mean that's for the better right because if it's a fantasy then it shouldn't come back, but don't marry a woman you can't reason with and don't marry a woman who won't subjugate her will to reason and evidence and she shouldn't marry you if you won't subjugate your will to reason and evidence, you cannot. You cannot have a happy marriage with someone who will not subjugate themselves to reason and evidence, because then it's all just a battle of wills. And a battle of wills, women will generally win a battle of wills because they're willing to escalate more than men. All right. Stef, do you think Trump will eventually start cutting welfare and leveling out the playing field between the sexes?
[1:31:26] Well not in the next couple of years when you point this out some women will say it's payback for being enslaved for generations well i mean a woman who says that a female dominance, is payback for being enslaved for generations is just a propagandist, I mean, there's this funny thing where women think that men were treated well throughout history, that the only thing that existed in human history were kings and prostitutes. That's the only things that existed were hyper-privileged men and hyper-abused and subjugated women. I don't know why they think that, but the fact that men were at the front line of hunting, which was more dangerous than gathering, the fact that men were constantly drafted and sent off to die in wars, the fact that men were expected to deal with intruders and violent and dangerous animals and so on, and the fact that men were constantly being injured in the building of shelter, and, you know, as I mentioned, the hunting of animals. So they just don't see it. They don't see it.
[1:32:40] They don't see it. The only thing that exists It's like, it's like in, in the, the communist world, right? The communist mindset, the only thing that exists are evil capitalists and helpless workers. It's the only thing that exists. There's nothing else. There's no nuance, no complexity, no subtlety. Right. And so for, uh, leftist women, the only thing that exists are asshole Kings and poor little women married office as children.
[1:33:13] So, yeah, it is, um, it's very sad.
[1:33:19] Or is it? Or is it? So right now we're in a whole phase in society where the people most susceptible to propaganda are having the fewest children. Yeah. How many women do you think were out working, gold panning and drilling, right? Yeah, I mean, I'll say this to my daughter when we sort of were driving someplace, and this is from farmer's fields, and, you know, now she's old enough where she gets, but I'd say, you know, you know, we go through the woods, there's trees everywhere, and this is the case. How did this farmer's field come about? They had to pull trees with infinite roots out of the ground without machinery. That wasn't women. That was men.
[1:34:17] So, when a tribe was conquered, the men were killed and the women were often taken as wives. Now, pulling stumps is crazy hard work. It's insane. If you've ever had to do that kind of work, I mean, it's absolutely insane. I remember standing in the frozen tundra with a giant flamethrower trying to get through the permafrost. It's mad how difficult it is to work with raw nature. It's incredible. How hard it is.
[1:34:51] Now, but the Christian women, I had this debate with a guy the other day. The Christian women are not submitting to their men. Well, I'll submit to you if I judge you worthy. It's like, no, no, that's not. You can't marry a guy and then say he's not worthy of submitting to. I don't understand that. And the trust issues right the trust issues are crazy, there's a bit in Roald Dahl's The Witches where the man character is happy to be turned into a mouse because he won't have to go to war and die I found it shocking in a children's book and still think about it sometimes oh I was desperate to be a dog when I was younger, I hated going to school I had just moved to Canada and we were living with my mother's half-brother in Whitby and there was a, dog it was a collie, beautiful dog and I just remember going off to school, tired, bored, hating it every step of the way and the dog was like lying in a beam of sunshine and was going to get fed and couldn't go do whatever he wanted and I was like, oh god, I'd love to be a dog oh, Love to be a dog.
[1:36:14] Remember dad working to remove a tree stump from the front yard of the cottage, used a chain and a car to get it out. Oh, yeah, it's crazy. But you've got to look back in time. Everything was clear. That was men. And the women, look, the women were working hard too. It was hard to raise kids and the gathering and all of that. I get that for sure. But, yeah, women can't trust men in general because their mothers chose bad men and won't take responsibility for it, so they just blame men. Right. Men can often be too hard on themselves. Women are often not hard enough on themselves, except for, oh, my thighs are too fat, like just useless physical stuff. Right.
[1:36:58] So women have trust issues because, well, you know how it runs for a lot of women. Of course, not, not all, maybe not even most, but for a lot of women, it's like you have a, you have a baby with a loser and then you expect an alpha to raise him. And it's like, nope, nope. You have a baby with a loser and you don't say, whoops, spread my legs for a loser. That's bad because he was hard. Right. And, and so women are like, well, I couldn't trust the loser. So that was bad on him. Men are untrustworthy. And then they say, well, I can't trust the successful men because they won't commit to me.
[1:37:38] Well, it's like a guy who just dates crazy women for wild sex and then says, well, I can't trust women. And it's like, no, you can't trust your own judgment, or you shouldn't. All right. Any of the last questions, comments, tips, donations, support, help, out, aid? It's a short month.
[1:37:53] Really, if you're listening to this later, of course, you're listening to it because people support the show, right? You know that the show only exists because people support the show. So please do your part, especially if it's been a while and you can afford it. You really should do it because what you fund grows. What you starve of funds shrinks. So if you could help out the show freedom and com slash donate you get massive amounts of goodies goodies and bonuses go to premium.freedomand.com see the 200 plus wild premium shows premium live streams access to the ais fantastic stuff all right have yourself a great beautiful wonderful perfect evening thank you for a great topic tonight lots of love from my pmi friends i'll talk to you soon bye.
Support the show, using a variety of donation methods
Support the show
