I have written my first article in years for the amazing new Islander magazine. It's called "Losing the Language of Freedom," and it is a must-read!
You can get the magazine here:
https://lotuseaters.com/islander-2-11-09-24
Related to your post of death by heroism.
Is creating and nurturing life a superpower, e.g. creating families?
I can scarcely imagine the amount of joy there is in been involved as a parent, and seeing the progression in your daughter for example.
Why do the man-children avoid it? What is the fear?
Hi Stef, I'm a couple of weeks behind on your show and working on catching up! If this has been mentioned before then please skip over my question 🙂 I heard on the lotus eaters podcast that you have contributed an article in their latest issue of the islander magazine, which had me immediately purchase it. As a UK citizen I find their podcast to be very useful in navigating the maelstrom that my country has become over the past 2 months, so I am excited to hear that my favourite guide in moral reasoning (you) is collaborating with them again. It will be a few weeks before it is printed/posted out so I was wondering if you could drop any hints about the subject of your article? If you think that it's best that I wait to find out for myself then I fully understand!
Apologies if it has been asked before, but I read implicit in your philosophy that God (if such an omnipotent, omniscient, omnibenevolent being exists) has not made his approval known of any particular religion. Is the question of God and any potential source of divine revelation outside of the scope of your interest, does it seem like God has not approved of any religion or that any and all miracles are not credible, or something else entirely?
I ask this because as a Catholic I glean divine approval of Traditional Catholicism (such as it was before John XXIII) from the miracles of Catholic saints and the eucharist (and besides that the truth of the testimony of many Catholic martyrs).
How can you tell the difference between a legitimate desire or need and a narcissistic impulse that demands to be satisfied? Sometimes I feel like the boundary between self-care and self-indulgence is blurry.
I posted a lengthy question in this thread a few hours ago on my relationship struggles. But then I remembered the RTR AI and pasted my question to it and received a thorough and amazingly helpful response. I’ve deleted my question here to give others more opportunity to get theirs answered, and want to call out the RTR AI and its benefits.
What do you think of the new YouTube policy where they will restrict/hide fitness & exercise content for teenagers because "it can lead to negative self beliefs and body image disorders"
Hi Stef, I'm noticing recently on Gab and other right majority platforms a marked rise in hatred for capitalism, ultimately basing their criticisms on things that are the direct results of state action. Why is it that many right-leaning people clearly understand the social consequences of government action, but appear to dismiss it entirely when it comes to economics?
0:00 - Morning Philosophy
1:36 - Embracing Muscularity
4:21 - Evaluating Strengths
5:04 - Frustrations of Competition
8:21 - The Cost of Laziness
9:07 - Struggles of Childhood
13:02 - The Power of Perseverance
14:51 - Starting to Move
15:40 - Parenting Challenges
21:03 - The Reality of Effort
30:09 - The Nature of Complaints
33:43 - Distinguishing Needs from Impulses
39:24 - Critique of Capitalism
42:32 - Missed Opportunities in Parenting
50:37 - The Weight of Responsibility
In this episode, we delve into profound insights on the philosophy of life, encapsulated through the metaphor of "everything is a muscle." Our discussion begins with the importance of nurturing various aspects of our lives, such as discipline, love, commitment, and resilience, which all demand consistent effort and practice. Reflecting on the joy of parenting and the responsibility of creating and maintaining families, we explore the challenges faced by those who shy away from these commitments, questioning the underlying fears that lead to avoidance and inactivity.
We emphasize that everything in life is developed through exertion and practice, using the analogy that if we don’t work our muscles, they wither away. Hard work, love, and even thinking are likened to muscles, requiring regular use to strengthen them. I articulate my personal philosophy of life, where the actions we take or fail to take directly shape our character and capabilities. It’s a call to be proactive—whether in physical fitness, relationships, or intellectual pursuits—because the consequences of passivity lead to atrophy in these essential life skills.
The discussion transitions to the social dynamics of evaluation and choice. I share my own experiences of being underestimated, illustrating how growth and skill can defy initial perceptions. I argue that in evaluating others, one must identify mental muscularity—the ability to engage thoughtfully and purposefully with the world. This further extends to the importance of surrounding ourselves with individuals who are equally committed to personal growth and excellence as opposed to those who may sap our energy through laziness and defeatism.
Venturing into the landscape of societal expectations, I address the tension between personal ambition and societal pressures, culminating in a critique of contemporary generational attitudes toward hard work and sacrifice. By reflecting on my childhood struggles and comparing them with my contemporaries, I underscore the necessity of grit and resilience, advocating for a shift in mindset from viewing challenges as burdens to seeing them as opportunities for growth.
Our conversation takes a critical turn as we navigate the complexities of parenting and societal norms. We explore how gender stereotypes and modern political dynamics can distort perceptions of family roles and responsibilities. The episode invites listeners to question the narratives surrounding expectations—what it means to provide, support, and love in a family context—and how much emphasis is placed on superficial attributes compared to substantive skills necessary for building lasting relationships.
In examining current cultural trends, I provide commentary on the importance of practical skills that contribute to household management and family well-being, while expressing concern over a growing trend of entitlement devoid of effort. The conversation culminates in a passionate discourse on the intrinsic value of striving for excellence and the imposition of wider societal consequences when individual responsibilities are neglected.
We finish with reflections on how academic and theoretical pursuits should transition into actionable practices that reinforce our values. I advocate for a rigorous approach to personal development, urging each individual to confront dissatisfaction with proactive steps toward resilience and growth. The episode serves as a reminder that the path to fulfillment is marked by consistent effort and a commitment to cultivating one’s abilities—because, ultimately, everything in life is indeed a muscle.
[0:00] Morning, morning, morning, everybody. Time for our morning constitutional philosophy. Welcome to Fantasy Island. Related to your post of death by heroism, that's at freedomandoutlocals.com, one of my favorite videos from the early days of freedom and is creating and nurturing life a superpower such as creating families. I can scarcely imagine the amount of joy there is in being involved as a parent and seeing the progression in your daughter. For example, why do the man-children avoid it? What is the fear? All right, just between us, this is all there is to know about the practical aspects of life. This is all there is to know about the practical aspects of life. Everything, everything, everything, everything, everything is a muscle. Everything is a muscle and everything is a skill. But let's just talk muscles, right? If you exercise, your muscles grow. If you don't exercise, your muscles atrophy.
[1:20] Hard work is a muscle. Love is a muscle. Kindness is a muscle. Virtue is a muscle. Discipline is a muscle. Commitment is a muscle, integrity is a muscle, courage is a muscle.
[1:37] Be muscular or fade away. The reason why I work out is to remind myself of the discipline necessary to maintain the muscularity of life. Thinking is a muscle. This is my morning constitutional. This is my morning wake up the brain by thinking, reasoning, communicating. Empathy, empathy, empathy is a muscle. Focus is a muscle. Lazy doom scrolling destroys your focus. And Lord knows I'm not immune to this, so please understand, I say this not as any kind of world champion of muscularity, but this is the fact. Everything is a muscle. Love is a muscle. Commitment is a muscle. Use it or lose it. So why do people not have families or have children? Because they have atrophied themselves into inevitable laziness. Repeating NPC talking points rather than thinking for yourself is the avoidance of muscularity.
[2:59] So the way that the world works in practicality is you look at the people around you and you have to become, you have to become an expert at figuring out mental muscularity. You would not get involved in a strength, a team strength competition, like some sort of, like a rope pulling competition with a 98 pound weakling. Right? right if you were a combined wrestling team like you your two wrestling teams would combine for a score you would not get involved in the wrestling team with a 98 pound weekling when i first came to canada um i you know i was in the same category as everyone else as in hey we're gonna play baseball and it's like well we don't know about the fruity british kid so we're gonna pick him last. Turns out I'm a pretty good hitter and all of that. So then I moved up in the ranks. I was an unknown quantity. I wasn't particularly, I wasn't obviously muscular. I was like 11 years old, but I was an unknown quantity. The guys who were really, really great at baseball were picked first.
[4:21] You want people of strength and skill on your team.
[4:35] So, when you move through the world, you need to be able to very quickly evaluate who has any strength and skill in their mind. And if people do not have strength and skill in their mind, they will simply frustrate, baffle, undermine, sabotage, and annoy you. I mean, look at social media.
[5:05] I think it could be fair to say I have just a little smidge of experience with this.
[5:17] If you are a boxer in his prime, you know, 20-year-old Mike Tyson with the barrel neck, right? If you're a boxer in his prime, you want to go up against other boxers who have strength and skill.
[5:37] If you go up against some 98-pound weakling, it's going to be incredibly frustrating for you. Especially if the audience, like if you just clock and beat up that 98-pound weakling, the audience is going to be like, hey, he's such a bully and your reputation is going to suffer. So you have to, but also if you just pretend to spar and just laugh and joke at the guy's expense and make it into the comedy that it is, people are going to be like, ah, he's so mean. He's so mean. So you have to pretend to fight without actually fighting so that the mob doesn't get too angry, the guy doesn't get humiliated, but you don't actually want to lose. And so it's really frustrating. Anytime you're in a situation where you cannot give it your all, if it's a conflict situation and you cannot give it your all in terms of, quote, combat, right? I'm obviously, I'm talking intellectually here, but if you're in a boxing match and you have to only pretend to fight to save the other person's feelings so that the crowd doesn't think you're a bully and so on, it's really annoying, frustrating, and who would want to get involved in such a thing? Who would want to get involved in such a thing? That would be terrible. If you are teaching a child, I remember when I was a kid, it took me forever to really get good at racquet sports. I started playing at the age of five or six. It took me a long time to get good at racquet sports. And so if you're teaching a kid how to play racquet sports.
[7:06] There's a tough aspect to it, right? You have to be patient. They're going to hit the ball badly. They're going to get frustrated with themselves. The kids are not going to want to take instruction. I got it myself. They don't want it. So they're going to be maybe a little touchy. So it's a tricky, difficult, and challenging situation, which is fine. That's part of parenting. But it is much better when... You are playing a sport against somebody who's kind of on your level, right? I mean, love my wife, love playing pickleball with her, and she's a fairly good player, but she's my wife, and there's just only a certain amount of skill and speed and strength that she's capable of, given that she's, you know, all of 5'2 and 112 pounds or something like that. So when I play in leagues and I play against a skilled, fast, competent man, I can give it my all, right? And that's fun. That's nice, right? So having a hold back is always a challenge, right? You wouldn't go into business with someone who didn't really understand business and had no interest in learning, right?
[8:22] I mean, you wouldn't play racquet sports with a blind guy.
[8:29] So and but unfortunately the masses, view competence as bullying and and this is because we've been very infected by this sort of estrogen lace not specifically female but this kind of estrogen lace sympathy for the underdog right which is i i love the sympathy for the underdog stuff it's fantastic when you have a six-year-old and a three-year-old both fighting for the same resources. You absolutely have to have sympathy for the underdog. You have to restrain the six-year-old to make sure the three-year-old gets what is fair, but it's just terrible in society as a whole.
[9:08] So.
[9:14] I didn't like the struggles and strifes of my childhood. I didn't like having to get a job when I was 10 years old. I didn't like having to work three jobs through junior high and high school at times. I didn't like having to go and battle the elements working up north. I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like. You know, and there were times when I enjoyed it, but for the most part, I looked at my friends there was a friend of mine he had a really nice professional family they had a nice pool he never had to have a job he ended up taking a job at a computer store for a while, and he got to spend all summer by the pool reading, Hayek and von Mises while sipping on a Diet Coke.
[10:06] While I was sometimes slucking away way in the sun i had a job weeding gardens i had a job uh moving and installing office furniture which was brutal and um yeah it just i i looked at that guy's life with great envy, i looked at the kids who got to keep their money i didn't really get to keep my money, The money that I made was to pay rent at the age of 15 and onwards, and to buy food, and I didn't really have frivolous purchases as a teenager.
[10:50] I mean, even the, I guess the one big thing that I did spend on was a computer. When I got a bit of inheritance from my grandmother, I bought a computer. And you used it to play games and all of that, but I also used it to learn how to program, which ended up being my career for many years in my 20s and early 30s. So I didn't like that stuff. But it gave me mental muscularity. Don't want to do it? Get up and go and do it. It gave me resilience. It gave me spine and sinew and guts and marrow and willpower and just kind of doggedness, like to just keep going. That's all that matters in life is just keep going. Yes, people will throw logs across your path. They will sabotage you. There'll be weird traps. There'll be bugs that land on your leg when you're trying to concentrate. Giant bugs that sound like biplanes. So there'll be people who lie about you. They slander you. They oppose you. They get triggered and they speak not to you but to arouse the sentimentality and hatred of excellence in the mob. and there'll be all of this stuff that is going to happen to you over the course of your life, right? Anytime you try to do anything, you'll have 10,000 screaming banshees coming down on you like a ton of ghostly bricks telling you you're doing the wrong thing, right?
[12:15] I mean, you give someone a thumbs up and somehow it turns into a hate symbol, right? It is just one of these things, right? It is just one of these, it is just a sad fact of life that there is a kind of paralysis to action and opposition to action and decisiveness and competence and clarity that the powers that be want everyone to live in a fog and there's this ghost army that puts fog over every clear statement known to man and attacks anybody with the semblance of directness and clarity that is a fact of life it's a sad fact of life It comes out of childhood, and it comes out of political power. But that is the way that things are. So what are you going to do?
[13:03] The only thing in life. Just keep going. You get rejected by five girls, just keep going. You get rejected for ten jobs, just keep going. People lie about you, slander you, attack you, threaten you. Just keep going. The option being what? I mean, it is not exactly honorable to our ancestors who had to keep going in much worse circumstances, answers that we will ever find ourselves in. Just keep going. Everything in life is a muscle. Every time you rub one out rather than talk to a girl, you are weakening your capacity to talk to girls. Every time you take, quote, free money rather than getting a job, you cause your work Ethic to Atrophy.
[14:01] Every time you play a dopamine delivery addiction video game, rather than trying to achieve something in the real world, you weaken your capacity to get anything done. Every time you sit for a week rather than working out ever, you turn yourself into more and more puddle and putting, Putting, I used to be able to speak. Sorry, I was up late last night. But every time you don't move, you get more used to sitting. Every time you don't stand, you get more used to sitting. Every time you don't exercise, you get more used to apathy. Every time you back down, you get more used to cowardice. Everything in life is a muscle.
[14:52] And of course with all due sympathy to the people I've talked to over the years I've talked to.
[15:03] The number of messages that I've gotten over the years of guys who were like, I'm 28, I'm 30, I'm 35, I'm not getting anything done with my life. It's just passing me by. I'm still living with my parents and I don't really do much. And it's like, well, you got to start doing things. I mean, this is why Jordan Peterson starts with like, clean your room. Just start moving, start doing something. You got to build somewhere. I mean, if you have never, ever lifted a weight in a gym, then you don't start with the heavy plates. You start with going to the gym and studying the machines. You don't even maybe lift anything. You start with some research. You start with some light weights.
[15:41] It's embarrassing. It's humiliating. You feel terrible. Look at me. I'm a pear. So when there is great joy in parenting Parenting and parenting, good parenting, peaceful parenting, is a lot of work. Now, to me, it's much less work than any kind of aggressive parenting because it's work, but it's fun work. Like, philosophy is work, but it's fun work. But this is like this women these days. I mean, I don't mean to sound unfair, and I'm sure that there are lots of exceptions to this, but it seems to me that we have...
[16:22] Oh, I love these edge precipices that I linger on. We have just about the laziest generation of people coming up. Now, I know they can say, yes, but the boomers and they took all the good stuff and they bought all their homes for eight strawberries in 1962. I get all of that. But there's also unprecedented opportunity, laptop work, international work, learning AI to make money. There's unprecedented opportunities in the world as it is.
[16:52] And we have just about the laziest generation of people coming up. So we have all of the guys who don't have any hustle, don't have any willpower, don't have any focus, don't have any follow through. They're just like, I tried. I tried. It didn't work. And then you have all the girls who, you know, the guys say, well, what do you bring to the table? Say, I'm the table. I'm the table. and they just expect the princess treatment to be courted and they never provide any labor and effort and focus and support and practical skills and children and motherhood in return. It is narcissistic vanity as an adult to think that you don't have to put any effort or labor in. and you just have to be there. Why should men pay for our dates? Because look how much expensive my makeup is. It's like men don't even really like the makeup that much. We don't really like the makeup that much. Makeup is for yourselves, and makeup is for trapping simps into giving you resources. What the hell does makeup matter at 3 o'clock in the morning when your colicky baby is waking up for the fourth time? What the hell does that matter? What does makeup matter when you have to pack up and move a house?
[18:16] What does that matter? What does makeup matter when you have that dark midnight of the soul as a man and you're not sure you can keep going?
[18:27] I'll be right with you. I just need to do my mascara. None of that matters. What does makeup matter? What does makeup matter when you're giving birth? What does makeup matter when your kid needs comforting because they fell off a bike? Makeup is a promise of laziness.
[18:52] I mean, this is the big question, right? Women want to be taken care of a lot of times. They would like to, especially if they want kids, they would like for a man to be able to pay the bill so they don't have to work. Okay, fair enough, right? But then you say to the woman, what skills can you bring to bear on the household? And you can answer this question in the comments below. And this is particularly true for the younger men. How many women do you meet or know or date who know how to cook at least 20 meals, have a cookbook, and are really comfortable with the kitchen? I mean, that's an important skill. Family's got to be fed, right? How many women that you know and date know the dozen or so different ways to get stains of various things out of various fabrics or cloths or leathers or whatever, right? Wine on a white t-shirt, peanut butter on a couch. How many women know the wild alchemy of running a household? How many women do you know can balance a checkbook or know how to review all the visa statements and make sure all the charges are legit. How many women do you know who want to stay home, know how to run a household? Or they just sit there like Cleopatra in a milk bath expecting everything to be, well, I'll, you know, we can just door dash.
[20:22] So laziness, laziness, laziness, laziness. Now, I mean, of course you say, well, the women work out and they put makeup on and that's work and so on. Yes, but it's less work than working. Right. It's less work than working. I mean, I'm a pretty hard worker, I think, as you can tell by my output. My wife outstrips me. She is just she works a lot. And, you know, I'm lure her to relax. She works a lot. She does amazing things in her lives, and everything is just perfect the way that she manages and runs it. So that's work.
[21:04] So this is the great secret in life. Everything is a muscle. Everything is a muscle. I mean, a skill in a guitar is a memory muscle. It's a muscle memory, right? You just have to be able to know how to play guitar. Singing is a muscle memory. I mean, I sing because it's also a good exercise for me to be able to use this vocal instrument that I need to be able to communicate philosophy in a way that hopefully is pleasing to listen to. Everything is a muscle. And everyone you meet is showing you either muscularity or laziness. You meet someone, if they're not really getting much done with their life, they're promising you laziness. vagueness, vague depression, the decay of mental constitution.
[21:55] That they will fade and fold in the sign of any resistance and all of life as it is currently constituted is resistance to virtue, opposition to virtue, fog to clarity, hostility to love, and aggression against any practical intellectual self-defense. Everything in life is a muscle. Whatever you're not getting in life is because you haven't.
[22:27] Prepare yourself to achieve it. Hard work is a muscle. Do you say, well, I'll put out a certain amount of effort, and then you just allow yourself to whine and complain and decay and nag yourself, and it's too hard, and I'm not getting the rewards. Life is just a marathon. All you have to do is keep going, and you'll win. Because so many people drop out along the way. So many people drop out along the way. I've known this, like over the course of doing this philosophy show for For 19 years or so, I have known a lot of people who've been in the conversation, and been into philosophy who've dropped out and faded out.
[23:14] If you fade out before the race is over, you don't get the gold. You don't get the place. You don't get a medal. You don't even get the satisfaction of completion. everything is a muscle in life and you need to rigorously look at yourself and say, what are my strengths what are my weaknesses some weaknesses you can't do much about, that's fine you know maybe you're not the best singer or the most athletic person and maybe there's really not that much you can do about that that's fine that's stuff that i'm bad at and i that's a weakness of mine but i just avoid it, You look at your life And you say What's not working in my life? Whatever is not working in your life Is what you have indulged yourself To be lazy about, Whatever is not working in your life Is what you have indulged yourself To be lazy about And look I'm a big one for compassion and empathy But we also have to have Strictness and discipline.
[24:21] There are times when doing this show has felt like dangling under a bridge over a bottomless chasm. And what do you do? You just keep going. And I, of course, very quickly tell myself this is nothing compared to what my ancestors had to do. And one of my philosophical ancestors, William Mullany, best friends with the philosopher John Locke, was chased through Ireland and had to live in barns because he had criticized the king. I'm not living in barns and the woods and trying to live off berries and snatched rabbits.
[25:05] So why aren't people talking to each other, taking risks, getting knocked down, getting back up again? Because every legitimate challenge you avoid makes you weaker for the next one, right? It's like saying, well, I really want to get to bench press 200 pounds. I really, I have never worked out. I really want to get to bench press 200 pounds. So what I'm going to do is not go to the gym this week or next week or the week after or for the next six months or year. And then after that, after I haven't worked out or done any bench presses whatsoever, However, after that, I would go and bench press 200 pounds. It's like, nope, you'll be able to bench press less in two years or a year. You'll be able to bench press less in the future if you don't work out now. You'll be able to lift less and do less in the future if you don't do it now. It's now or never, literally now or never. So when you meet people in life who say, I'm dissatisfied with this and have no plan to resolve it, their dissatisfaction will grow until it's too late. The devil just wants you to postpone things until they're too late to fix or too late to achieve. And then he's happy, leaving you in the stink of your own sweaty regret. So why do people avoid having families? Because they're lazy.
[26:31] Because they have indulged their own pathetic laziness, to the point where they have no muscularity to get anything done in life and they have no plan to resolve it because they're so tender and sweet and sensitive with themselves, they treat themselves as infants. No, we don't have any expectations of labor from infants, so stop treating yourself like an infant. Man up, woman up. Start to achieve. Go talk to a man. Go talk to a woman. Have a plan. Have an achievement. Work out. Exercise. Ease better. Lose the weight. Just do whatever the hell you have to do in order to start achieving things. and stop being so fucking lazy, everyone.
[27:12] Because here's the last thing I'll say. Everything that keeps you alive is built by people who work incredibly hard. The electricity, the plumbing, the shelter, the food, the comfort, the air conditioning, like everything that keeps you alive is built by workaholics. I'm not saying necessarily be a workaholic, though that's not bad when you're young and single because it develops your muscularity of your work ethic. But everything that keeps you alive is built by people who work incredibly hard with great focus and great discipline. And if you're not joining them, then you're kind of parasiting off other people's hard labor.
[27:49] And that is no happy place to be for somebody with your gifts, if you're listening to this in particular. All right. Hi, Stef. I'm a couple of weeks behind on your show. I'm working on catching up. If this has been mentioned before, then please skip over my question. I heard on the Lotus Eaters podcast that you have contributed an article in their latest issue of the Islander magazine, which had me immediately purchase it. As a UK citizen, I find their podcast to be very useful in navigating the maelstrom that my country has become over the past two months. so I'm excited to hear that my favorite guide in moral reasoning, you, is collaborating with them again. It will be a few weeks before it is printed and posted out, so I was wondering if you could drop any hints about the subject of your article. If you think that it's best that I wait to find out for myself, then I fully understand. Yes, I was asked to contribute an article to a magazine in the UK with the Lotus Eaters podcast, and great guys, I hugely respect them, and I was happy to contribute. Attribute it is about parenting and politics so you can i will put the link to purchase that below i hope that you will do it it is something that is very beneficial and it's nice to have a hard copy of things as a whole so yes the islander magazine i will put a link to purchase it below.
[29:05] Apologies if it has been asked before but i read implicit in your philosophy that god if such an omnipotent, omniscient, omnibenevolent being exists has not made his approval known of any particular religion. Is the question of God and any potential source of divine revelation outside of the scope of your interests? Does it seem like God has not approved of any religion or that any and all miracles are not credible or something else entirely? Well, I don't accept hearsay. I am an empiricist, which means I need empirical evidence for things that are claimed to be true. True. If the laws of physics can be violated by particular individuals, that is a rather wild claim. It is to say that there is mind or faith or divine power over the behavior of matter, which doesn't explain why we need technology. If we can magic matter, why would we need technology? So, magic is a feminine concept. Magic is a feminine concept, which is why magical thinking arises as female political power arises.
[30:09] So when men complain.
[30:16] People roll their eyes and we get rejected and attacked and ostracized if we can keep complaining. When women complain, everything bends to their will. This is natural. It's nothing wrong with it. I'm just obviously, I mean, I'll give you an example, right? So the UN has aimed to get female genital mutilation ended by 2030. Great. You know, not necessarily that it's the UN that's doing it, but it's great when little baby girls are not genitally mutilated, but there's no such plan for boys. In fact, I remember seeing Mia Kunis, a complete monster of a human being, was in a movie, and there was a whole scene where the women were making fun of penises that aren't mutilated, intact penises.
[31:04] And, oh, it's like a sweater, a sweater pulled over. So you can, of course, if you can imagine a scene where men were mocking women who had not been genetically mutilated and saying it was so ugly and so on, right? That would be absolutely monstrous. But you can openly do this. You can openly mock, attack, humiliate, and ridicule men who have been genetically mutilated against their will at birth, had a third of their penis skin hacked away, which results in less sensitivity for the man, less pleasure for the woman, and more difficulties with maintaining erections and so on. And so there's no sympathy for men.
[31:56] There's there's there's no sympathy for men and so for women so if you look at magic it's that words change reality right you can mutter a spell now of course there's sophistry and all of that as well but it's peculiarly feminine because for a woman to complain or desire is for the men to protect and provide and so for a woman her words change matter her words summon powers that change matter, right? Either through complaining or desiring, right? Nagging or wishing. And so the fact that there is a system of magic wherein muttered words change the nature of reality, well, that is a female thing. And sophists are female, feminine as a whole. And again, I say this with great love and respect for femininity. I love the fact that women want things and men provide. That's why we have civilization and we're not living in caves. So it's a beautiful thing, but that's reality. So, when it comes to miracles, I just need to see empirical evidence.
[33:11] And there won't be any. There are no miracles. The only miracle is the mind. And it doesn't change reality except by obeying physical laws, not by violating them at will. All right. So he says, I ask this because as a Catholic, I glean divine approval of traditional Catholicism, such as it was before Pope John XXIII, for in the miracles of Catholic saints and the Eucharist, and besides that, the truth of the testimony of many Catholic martyrs.
[33:44] Well, I think you need to look at the role of the Catholic institutions in changing America. That's really quite something. something how can you tell the difference between a legitimate desire or need and a narcissistic impulse that demands to be satisfied sometimes i feel like the boundary between self-care and self-indulgence is blurry yeah so a legitimate legitimate desire or need and a narcissistic impulse that demands to be satisfied so the the key is escalation right so if you don't get what you want from someone if your impulse is to escalate uh aggression or manipulation or whining or complaining or a coldness or withdrawal, like to escalate in a non-direct way, to get what you want, then it's a narcissistic impulse that demands to be satisfied. You feel like you're owed and you don't need to reciprocate. So if you lend someone $1,000 and they keep dodging you for paying the money back and you really desperately need the money, then you will escalate. And then when the guy gives you the $1,000 back, when you finally kind of, quote, corner him and you demand the money back, he finally coughs up the money, you don't feel any desire to reciprocate because he's made it very, very difficult. So that's not a narcissistic impulse. That's you need to give me my $1,000 back because you promised you. I lent it to you on the word that you would pay me back, and you're avoiding and dodging me and making me do a lot of frustrating and difficult work to get my money back.
[35:05] So, for the narcissist, everything is just get your money back, right? They feel entitled in that way, right? They don't need to reciprocate, right? If the guy gives you his money back, you don't feel the need to, you know, thank him effusively and buy him dinner as thanks for giving you, it's like, you owe me the money. So for narcissists everyone owes them everything and if they don't get what they are quote owed they just escalate in the same way that you would escalate you know in a peaceful manner but you would escalate and get angry and hey man call me back i'm telling call me back there's a matter with you you promised me money this week i need the money i've got bills to pay call me back and you might knock on his door you might pound on his door i mean i wouldn't use any violence of course right but you would escalate because you're owed money so narcissists everything is owed to them and whoever doesn't provide to them is someone who has to be aggressed against so escalation is the key a legitimate need a legitimate desire need is one that is reciprocal right right so.
[36:09] If you have a friend, you know, you pay for dinner a couple of times and he doesn't make any move to pay for dinner, you'd say, I think it's your turn. Like I paid for the last three dinners and I think it's your turn. I mean, tell me if I'm wrong, but that's sort of my memory, right? So you're not escalating, right? And if the guy is like, well, to heck with you, I'm not paying for any dinners, would you escalate? No, you'd just be like, well, I kind of misjudged this friend. He's kind of a jerk. So good luck with all that, right? You'd move on, right? So escalation is when you feel entitled, you won't work for a win-win situation, right? So the guy might say, listen, I appreciate the thing, I'm totally broke. But, you know, I know you've got that stuck screen door, so maybe I can come over and fix that instead, right? It's like, okay, well, then there's some reciprocation or whatever it is, right? That could work, right?
[36:54] So a legitimate need is when there's an exchange of values for a win-win. A narcissistic impulse is when you feel entitled and you will simply escalate in a non-verbal way, oh sorry, escalate in a non-direct way. So somebody who storms around and slams doors and won't give you a hug and like that's just escalating in an indirect way. So when you manipulate or bully people to get what you feel you are entitled to without ever thinking about a win-win situation, that's not work. All right, I posted a lengthy question in this thread a few hours ago on my relationship struggles, but then I remembered the real-time relationships artificial intelligence and pasted my question to it.
[37:32] And received a thorough and amazingly helpful response. I've deleted my question here to give others more opportunity to get theirs answered, and I want to call out the Real-Time Relationships AI and its benefits. Well, yes, I hope that you will check out the Real-Time Relationships AI. Donors will find it pinned to the top of the feed.
[37:50] What do you think of the new YouTube policy where they will restrict, hide fitness and exercise content for teenagers because, quote, it can lead to negative self-beliefs and body image disorders? Disorders well i mean nobody cares about negative self-beliefs because uh i mean males and in particular white males are blamed for all the world's ill so they don't care about negative self-beliefs they actually want to inflict it on those they dislike enormously um no they just want um it's part of the general depopulation agenda to uh to to sort of be fat bossy body positive which is to i mean if a woman is is obese uh she's less attractive men don't want obese women I guess, except for a few traumatized by fat babysitters, chubby chasers, but men don't want that. And also women who are obese have trouble conceiving and bringing babies to term. They have trouble sometimes with hygiene and so on. So it is just a way to make sure that women stay unattractive and therefore single. That helps with the depopulation agenda. gender. And it also helps with the political power of the left. As we know, the left's biggest constituency is single women, right? Women without the protection and care and provision of a man.
[39:03] And so they will sabotage women's pair bonding capacities in order to maintain political power. I mean, it's simple, right? So no, it's just a way of making sure that women stay unattractive and therefore stay single and therefore will marry the state and vote for expansions of political which feeds the power lust of the power mongers. All right.
[39:24] Hi, Stef. I'm noticing recently on Gab and other right-majority platforms a marked rise in hatred for capitalism, ultimately basing their criticisms on things that are the direct results of state action. Why is it that many right-leaning people clearly understand the social consequences of government action, but appear to dismiss it entirely when it comes to economics? Well, of course, that's the great lure of the evils of National Socialism or Nazism, which is fascism for the domestic population is somehow infinitely better than communism for the international population. And in-group totalitarianism is not any better as far as violations of the non-aggression principle go than out-group totalitarianism. So that is the great. So, and of course, people get frustrated at materialism, they get frustrated at shallow stuff, they want sort of a deep, more muscular, more earthy, and more communal-based living, and they think that the mall is somehow destroying all of that. So, there is a dislike at the shallow, empty trinkets pushed upon shallow, empty people, which consumes massive amounts of resources, time, and attention. So, yes, there is that lure that when you're running away from international collectivism to run for in-group collectivism, and this is a terrible idea, it is an absolute disaster, and the only solution is peaceful parenting and rational discourse. And, um...
[40:51] I was reviewing some of my earlier shows for a variety of reasons. And I came across, you know, why I talk about parenting from the very beginning of the show. And it is really the greatest tragedy that will exist in the future, looking back upon this time. I genuinely believe this, and I could make the case for it perhaps another time, but we've been going for a while here. The greatest tragedy that will exist in the future is the lack of listening to me for close to 20 years talking about peaceful parenting and rational discourse. course.
[41:27] If people interested in liberty, which is a huge segment of the population, if people interested in liberty had listened to and accepted my incontrovertible arguments about the need to focus on peaceful parenting almost 20 years ago, we would have millions and millions of children coming to adulthood thoroughly versed in the principles of liberty, self-actualization, rational discourse affection love moral courage we would have a a cohort of millions and millions of young adults who would be so benevolent and powerful and clear and strong and admirable and healthy that it would be a movement that would swell beyond the recognition of the world as it stands because it would be so let me you'd oh my oh you're one of the peacefully parented kids right Because they'd just be so free and fun and admirable and courageous and connected and staunch and all of that.
[42:33] We would have the evidence now. And most people learn from empirical evidence rather than abstract theory. And the fact that the people who claimed to be learning through abstract theory heard my arguments for peaceful parenting. And to the most degree rejected them. I mean, if you look at the amount of energy-focused time and attention and money that was thrown into politics over the past 20 years from liberty-minded people, as opposed to peaceful parenting, you can see that the greatest opportunity in the history of the world was utterly, utterly missed. And I do, of course, I look at myself with a great scalding criticism from time to time and say, what should I have done differently? What could I have done differently? How could I have approached it differently? How could I have...
[43:21] Summoned. You know, there are some people who have this amazing ability. I'm not one of them. It's one of them. It's a weakness. It's just a fact. There are some people who have this amazing ability to have people, you know, follow them into the fires of hell themselves, right? I mean, Napoleon obviously was one of these kinds of people and other people of various levels of positive or negative leadership qualities. I am not one of those people who can summon that kind of a loyalty. I mean, in part because I don't want people to be loyal to me. I want people to be loyal to reason and integrity and virtue in their own conscience. But there are some people who can do that. Like they just summon this immense army of ride-or-die people who will follow them into the fires of hell itself. I'm not one of those people. And I try not to be overly insistent and dominant in my communication with the world because I don't want people to fall in line with me like a bunch of salmon in a swift current, like the gale force of my will causing them to be either fleeing or in alignment. I don't want that. I mean, I'm pretty sure I could summon that if I really needed to, but I don't want to bring anyone into philosophy as a servant or a follower. And the last thing, I don't want anyone want to follow me. I want people to follow their own conscience, their own minds, and the abstract dictates of reason, honor, and justice.
[44:51] So all I could do was reason and exhort and charm and plead with the world and put forth as many rational and empirical arguments as humanly possible, which I think I did. I interviewed all the experts, Dr. Elizabeth Gershoff and others. I got all the data together. I made endless presentations on UPB, on peaceful parenting, almost from the very beginning of the show. And I exhorted and criticized and occasionally shamed and begged people in the liberty world to talk about parenting and focus on the the gravest violations of the non-aggression principle that we can do the most about, which is aggression against children. And I was mostly ignored and attacked and ostracized and rejected. You know, again, there was, there are some exceptions for sure, but for the most part, and this will be viewed as, uh, I think in the future will be viewed as the.
[45:59] Largest betrayal of integrity from any group that is the most important in the world. Because eventually we're going to get to peaceful parenting and people will look back and say, what a missed opportunity that was. And listen, I'm fully aware that people may look back and say, yeah, but he was kind of a jerk about it. And he did this wrong and he did that wrong. And it's like, yeah, I mean, that's for the judgment of history. I've been as critical and rigorous with myself as possible to try and be as positive as possible. And it's like, oh, well, he just got off frustrated and he rage quit and like there could be all of these criticisms in the future and i will obviously i'll be dead and gone and dust in the wind by then but they may be perfectly reasonable criticisms i maybe have a complete blind spot i look back and say well i tried humor i tried debates i tried data i tried powerpoints i wrote entire books about this kind of stuff and i brought it up wherever possible and i'm a pretty good communicator like a billion views and downloads of abstract philosophy is not the easiest feat of the world to achieve so i did as much as possible in as positive a manner as possible and i also demonstrated it through my own parenting i have had um my daughter off and on on the show since she was two years old and so i've put the reason out with good humor with evidence and with criticism and and some legitimate frustration because i'm not going to lie about my experience when people say oh all we want to do is uphold the non-aggression principle. I'm like, well, the best place to do that is between parents and children.
[47:27] And I put forth all the case repeatedly, repeatedly for almost 20 years.
[47:33] Maybe there's some big thing I could have done or something I missed out on. I'm perfectly willing to accept that as a criticism, but I don't know what it is. And I'm, It is not incumbent upon me to possess the will of others in order to affect positive change. In fact, if I possess the will of others, in other words, if I just browbeat and charm and work the furnace bellows of my charisma in order to drive out their hesitation and inhabit their personality with cult-like certainty, I have not done a service to philosophy. Using my powers of rhetoric and personality to, in a sense, possess the hearts, minds, and balls of other people is not doing a service to philosophy. And tempting though it has been, tempting though it has been, I have resisted that temptation because people have to choose. That which you are convinced of and choose is a virtue that lasts. That which you are.
[48:40] Propagandized about and surrender to is a virtue that will not last and will not result in peace towards children because you will simply end up with inevitable blowback and you won't have the strength to maintain it and that will discredit it right i could have perhaps improved some, children's experience in the short run by working the bellows of charisma to in a sense possess possess the minds of others, but it would have discredited the movement in the long run because it has to be chosen voluntarily and it has to be pursued out of a deep sense of virtue and integrity, peaceful parenting, not because I've charmed and half bullied everyone into accepting the position. That's not a thing I'm going to do. I will not do that because I'm a free will guy and excessive charisma is a form of determinism for the weak-willed.
[49:30] I think it would be viewed as the biggest missed opportunity, looking back in the future on the world that is. And maybe, again, maybe it would be laid at my feet as having done something wrong. I can't see what that is. But again, I'm obviously not omniscient. But I certainly have done the very best that I can in this. And again, there have been some wonderful people who have accepted this. But yeah, I still remember seeing a conference. I think it was Hans Hoppe who was talking about that hitting children is a good thing, and was it done? There's a couple of people who know better, just kind of nodding along. Okay, well, we're in the world, and people are not ready yet, and it's a real shame, because the amount of suffering that's going to be happening in the world, because people have not accepted and promoted this, who absolutely know that it's the right thing to do, that, honestly, the hundreds of thousands or millions of people who've not accepted and promoted this.
[50:28] Over the last 20 years, I'm responsible for an unbelievable amount of suffering, and their conscience knows that, and there's really nothing I can do about that either.
[50:38] They just will have hardened into this position of high-rolling avoidance. So it is a very sad thing and it is one of the biggest heartbreaks that I have, but with the acceptance again that I feel like I did everything that I could, short of again trying to dominate people with charisma and language and bully, bribe and shame them with approval and disapproval into following the right path because, if you're blindfolded and dragged around the countryside that doesn't make you an expert in the landscape it just makes you someone who's blindfolded and dragged around the countryside.
[51:23] And people will unfortunately have to see the effects of violent parenting played out in the world with modern technology and weapons before they'll say oh maybe like it's kind of funny right like a lot of people when i was saying to people you from the very beginning of this show like it it doesn't matter even if they're family. Principles are bigger than family, right? And we know that, right? I mean, principles are bigger than family. Principles, like moral principles, are bigger than family. We know that. Because if the father is the getaway driver for his son's bank robbery, we don't say, oh, well, the father's not going to go to prison because honor thy mother and thy father. It's like, no, no, he violated the law. He violated property rights. Even if he didn't rob directly, he enabled the robbery by driving. And so, um...
[52:09] He goes to jail. Like, we know that, right? We know that. Oh, splitting up families, like, I mean, families will get split up because some guy doesn't pay his taxes and goes to jail, right? So, I mean, splitting up families is like, we understand that moral rules are bigger, or at least laws, right? Which are supposed to be some representation of moral rules are bigger than families. Families and so people who are independent thinking independent minded and so on if you had a bad family or or a dysfunctional family and they wouldn't admit their corruption and violence and dysfunction and aggression and scorn and ostracism like all the negative traits people were like well no i need to i need to stick with my family and okay and then your family dumped you over the covid situation right your family you weren't allowed to see them or they dumped you because you wouldn't get back like so like all of this sacrifice of personal integrity for the the sake of, oh, my family, my family. Well, what happened over COVID?
[53:03] It turned out that you were sacrificing yourself for people who were willing to throw you off a cliff because the TV told them to. Oh, it's so sad. It's so sad. All right. Hope you enjoyed the conversation, freedomain.com slash donate. I absolutely love this conversation. I am thrilled to have these questions. You can post them wherever you like, but you can follow me on social media. You can go to freedomain.com slash connect to find where I am. I look forward to your support. freedommaine.com slash donate. Don't forget you get the History of Philosophers series this month, my birthday month, by the way. So thanks, everyone, for the greatest conversation I think the world will ever see, because everything after this has this as a precedent, and this is a participatory action. And I really, really thank you for helping me scale the heights of reason and language that we were able to get to. We are a team. I might be the funder, but you are the Sherpa. So thank you so much, everyone. one. Have yourself a wonderful day. I'll talk to you soon. Bye.
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