0:00 - Welcome to Fantasy Island
2:22 - Overcoming Approach Anxiety
12:26 - Advice for Meeting Quality Women
27:24 - The Selfishness of Insecurity
37:56 - Balancing Career and Family
52:26 - The Role of Skepticism in Society
1:01:40 - Disappointment in Film Adaptations
1:07:03 - Community and Upcoming Discussions
In this episode of the podcast, we delve into the intricacies of social interaction and personal relationships, with a candid exploration of the challenges people often face when trying to connect with others, particularly romantic interests. The discussion begins with an acknowledgement of the natural anxiety that many experience when approaching someone they find attractive—a feeling that is not only common but indicative of genuine care and concern for outcomes and relationships.
We reflect on personal anecdotes to underline the importance of authenticity when communicating. I recount my own lived experiences of dating, which reveal that our nervousness often stems from a desire to project a false self or pretense rather than just embracing the moment as it is. When I was younger and dating, I frequently found myself wrapped in self-doubt, questioning whether I was “good enough” or whether my interests were genuinely aligned with the person I was approaching. A key takeaway is the realization that approaching someone is best done authentically, without the unnecessary embellishments or fabrications that can cloud genuine interaction.
We explore the theme of intentionality behind attraction. This leads me to question an individual's motivations for seeking relationships. Are we drawn to someone for their genuine qualities, or solely for superficial traits? This distinction is crucial because it directly influences not only our approach but also the outcomes of our interactions. I emphasize the necessity of introspection—understanding one's own values and offering something meaningful in return. It's vital to recognize that each person has something unique to contribute to a relationship.
As the conversation continues, we tackle the notion of self-perception and its impact on social interactions. I argue that insecurity often arises from a preoccupation with oneself instead of focusing on the mutual benefits that a potential relationship can provide. This could lead to a mindset that makes one hesitate to engage with others. The importance of believing in one’s value and the impact one can have on another’s life is highlighted as a remedy to this insecurity. We discuss how overcoming personal fears and issues not only empowers individuals to foster connections but is also a moral obligation to share one's gifts and contributions with the world.
Throughout the episode, we touch on practical advice for those struggling with anxiety in social settings. I encourage listeners to prioritize the experience of others over their own fears. In doing so, they will not only find it easier to communicate but also enrich the lives of those around them. The discussion emphasizes that interaction is about forging connections and supporting one another, rather than merely worrying about acceptance or rejection.
Listeners are invited to reflect on their own experiences and approach relationships with a renewed perspective. If we strive to be open, honest, and receptive to the experiences and emotions of others, we foster relationships that are not only rewarding but also transformative. We conclude with a call to action: to engage with the world, confront fears, and navigate this intricate dance of human relationships with courage and authenticity.
[0:00] Good evening. Welcome to Fantasy Island. Welcome 27th of September, 2024. 27th of September, 2024, shortly past the time of normal beginning. Free domain.com slash donate to help out the show. As I expend every helium breath to keep Bitcoin above 89. Above 89. night. It's doing aight. It's doing aight. Best way to spend a Friday night with your wife and me. No, philosophy, menage à 1990, if I do say so myself. All right. All right. Let's get to your questions. Sorry, there were a bunch of questions in the last stream, but they're gone. Oh, actually, could I get them back? I'm pretty sure I could, right? Oh, that's not it. All right let me have a look back here i should be able to go back, to get your questions.
[1:08] Oh starting now yeah that was the last one right, uh no i don't want to turn on a live chat i don't know what the heck that means means? One hour to go. All right. Peaceful Parenting available in Spanish, en Espanol, arriba. So peacefulparenting.com, peacefulparenting.com, please share it with people. I would appreciate that. The condensed version is now available in Spanish, in Spanglish. So that's good. So that's good. I hope you will check that out and I hope that you will share that. All I'll write. Hey, Stef, I have trouble approaching women. When I want to, I feel a mental block and my mind goes blank. Then I lose my train of thought. My first thought is someone in my past benefits from me staying single. Does this sound correct? Interesting. Hit me with a why. Why, if you have trouble talking to women you're attracted to, it's also known as being a man, I certainly did when I was single.
[2:23] I've mostly gotten over it with my wife.
[2:33] So, hit me with a why, why, if you have trouble talking to women you are attracted to, I must know. You must tell me. So, the first thing to recognize and remember, of course, is that this is a perfectly natural, healthy, and common phenomenon. It means that you care, right? If you didn't care about rejection, you'd be a sociopath, and that's not good. Really not good. You don't want that. You don't want to be free of fear. That means you're free of conscience and humanity. So, it just means that you care.
[3:23] And in general when I look back at the women I was most nervous to talk to it's because I was approaching them for entirely the wrong reasons and the reason that I was tense about talking to the women was I was lying through my teeth lies were exuding from me like snot from the nose hole of a narwhal. I was lying through my... Oh, no, honey, I just... Although you have a curvaceous and lovely body, I am just... I'm fascinated by your mind and your thoughts and your dreams and desires. I often have attacks of conscience when I want to lie to get into a woman's pants. So, yeah, it's the lying. It's the lying. Why are you approaching the women? Why? Do they have a spark? Do they have a great smile? Do they seem to have a good sense of humor? Do they appear friendly, nice, positive, enthusiastic, affectionate, whatever? Or are they just pretty?
[4:25] So pretty. So pretty. They deserve to be in the back of a windowless van on the way to the cult combat. So, yeah, why are you approaching the women? Why are you attracted to the women? Why are you talking to the women? Is it for their virtues or their prettiness? And again, these two can be combined, and I get all of that, right? but maybe you have a mental block because you're lying through your teeth. And I say this with all humility, having done it myself. There was a girl I dated in high school.
[4:59] Man, she just had a look that was staggering to me. I dated her, and I was constantly looking for intelligent comments. I remember once she made an intelligent comment, and I was like, yes! Turns out it was kind of like an eclipse. Nice girl, nice girl. Just not a lot going on. The lobes were not lobing. Did not love the lobes and maybe you have a block because, going after a woman for her looks alone is a disaster that your brain is trying to save you from you got your balls rolling at the bowling pins of the pretty girls and maybe you're getting blocked for that just possibility, just a possibility.
[5:58] I never really had much difficulty talking to my wife at all because I have for you know 22 plus years I mean I've been incredibly blessed I won't say necessarily lucky but very happy to have you know such a great person in my life it's never been tough to talk to we've never had any challenges talking, you know, I remember a friend of mine when I was younger, was talking about how when she and her husband would go out for dinner, they'd see all of these couples just kind of staring at each other. And she said, you know, when I was younger, I thought, my God, we're never going to be that. We're never going to be that couple. And she's like, yeah, but life happens. And yeah, I've had a bunch of dinners with my husband. We're just staring at each other with nothing to say. That has never happened. Thank you very much for the tip that has never happened uh with my wife.
[6:55] She is great fun to talk to very insightful very creative very funny uh but still not funny my daughter is the funniest person in the family i mean don't get me wrong she's a teenager so you have to have a little bit of a thick skin but she's absolutely the funniest person in the family okay it's not even close and um but yeah i mean i remember when my wife and i first just accidentally went out we weren't even supposed to go out we're supposed to go out the whole volleyball team but everyone had to cancel for some reason so it's just my wife and i we just had this electric conversation and went on for like two and a half hours and when i left i actually carried the little fold the little restaurant fold i still have it that they put the bill in i've never done that before or since. So clearly I wanted to take something home. I wanted to take something home. And then in 11 months we were married and I did. So maybe, just maybe. Your nervousness is trying to keep you from getting into a disastrous situation where you're dating based upon a lie. So, I mean, it could be any number of possibilities, but that would be interesting. That would be interesting.
[8:11] Sexual shame. Yeah, so there is a kind of thing. Ah, my lovely brother. So I remember there was this girl that I really liked. Ah, the Don Mills Mall. It no longer exists anymore. That bothers me. You know, we're made for a lot more continuity than we have. We're made to hoe the back 40 around castles that have been around for a thousand years. And the only thing that changes are the seasons and the leaves. But everything changes. Everything gets scooped up and rearranged and undone and redone.
[8:43] That mall, I spent a lot of time at that mall, at the Don Mills Mall. mall. I wasn't like the mall rats, you know, like, they're not there to shop, they're not there to work, they're just there. It wasn't because of that. It was because I had a variety of jobs. I worked in a hardware store, I cleaned offices in that mall, and I worked in a convenience store in that mall. And so I spent a lot of time at the Don Mills Mall. It was actually a great mall. It was a great mall, by the way. My mother and I used to go for dinner at this little restaurant, at the top of the mall it was actually not a very good restaurant at all and um i remember my mother had a piece of fried fish and she was like oh i must bring out the chef i mean if she was in one of her grandiose moods lord knows i've never had that but i hear it happens to the occasional but she was in one of her grandiose moods and she's like you must bring out the chef i must compliment him and this guy came out just kind of greasy and and stained then he's just like Like, why does a customer want to talk to me? I think he looked stoned. And I just remember him like, oh, yeah, thanks.
[9:49] I was just kind of standing there like a slightly swinging sack of potatoes. But I spent a lot of time in that mall, and there was a girl.
[9:59] Typhling type. There was a girl in the record store. And I would go in and browse for records. You know when you're pretending to be doing something, but you're shooting, like you can't look at the girl, it's like an eclipse, or you can't stare at it, because your nipples will inflame and not in the way. That you pay for but you know with the hot wax anyway i don't have to get into details we all understand what i'm talking about i was looking at a corner of my eye just be stealing glasses stealing glasses stealing hearts and stealing glasses and i remember i finally did get up to talk to her and i've started i was talking to her and my brother came up and said wipe the drool off stiff and he just pretended you know and it's just like because you know you're talking to a girl because you're attracted to her but you don't want to bruise the delicacies by saying oh oh Oh, like, sir, like, sir. That's tense, right? That's tense. So there could be some shaming around that if you've had that in the past. Mostly gotten over it with your wife. I was just kidding. But yeah, when you just find somebody who's so easy to talk to and you just absolutely love and enjoy talking to them, you know, put a ring on it if they're fertile.
[11:12] All right. Hey, Stef, long-time listener. Thanks for all you do. Two, what would your advice be to someone who wants to meet a quality woman and get married, but is too afraid to go out and interact with women in public? Are you... Give me your age range. You don't have to tell me the exact age. Give me your age range. By the way, thank you, Graham. I really appreciate that. Somebody says, long-time listener. Somebody, I say, Graham. Oh, he's crackers. Making good money now and so pleased to be able to support you more than sharing philosophy. 39 years old. 38 years old. never kissed a girl 39 years old and just had my first baby with peaceful parenting as my bedrock thanks to you love you brother you're like the dad i never had that might be a conversation for another time thank you graham and massive massive massive congratulations thank you thank you thank you all right sorry let me get to your let me get to your questions, somebody says yeah my son is the funniest person in our family he's only one, even when he goes rubber bones because he hates getting dressed. It's pretty funny. Alright, if you asked a question previously and you want to re-ask, you can find it here. Okay, thanks, I'll check that. Alright.
[12:26] Desiree, you don't need to give me an essay. I'm just asking for your age range.
[12:40] Not for me, but for a couple of friends. One is in his 30s, one is in his 40s. All right. If I help you, everybody who's listening to this now or later, if I help you, genuinely help you, lose your anxiety about talking to members of the opposite sex, I can assume, I'm not even going to ask, I'm just going to assume that's worth a donation or two. Because I can tell you, I can absolutely tell you how to avoid your anxiety, about talking to the opposite sex. Hit me with a why if that's an issue. You want to be more comfortable talking to a girl if you're a boy, a boy if you're a girl, or whatever. Whatever. Hit me with a why if that's of value to you and I will tell you something that is going to blow your mind and change your life. I am not kidding. Blow your mind. Change your life. Might even get you blown as a whole. Change your pants. I'm definitely going to join a gym class to meet women, yeah? Do you want to share your AI fine-tuning approach? I don't think so. I don't think I want to do that. Yes. All right.
[13:58] So everyone thinks that finding it hard to talk, I'm just going to talk boy to girl, right? So everyone thinks that finding it hard to talk to girls is because of insecurity. It's not. It's because of selfishness.
[14:11] It's because of selfishness. The reason why you have a tough time talking to girls is because you're selfish, because you're making it about you. My insecurities, my fear, my desire. Oh, I don't want to get rejected. Oh i me me i i shut up not everything in life is about you and your whole mirrors of self-regard it's not about you i learned this in software sales in my 20s right i built this amazing beautiful wonderful piece of software and i had to go and sell it now did i go and sell it from the perspective of well i really need money to make payroll so you got to buy my software because it's about me and my needs, and don't reject me, and I've got to get paid, and I've got this great software. No. No, no, no, no. I had a great piece of software, and I wanted to share it with the world. You grok, right? You follow, right? It was not about me. It was about my software and the amazing benefits my software could provide to the world. It's not about me. It's about the software and the benefit to someone else. It's the same thing with philosophy. It's not about me. It's about the benefit that philosophy can provide to the world. Right?
[15:36] That's what it's about. It's about the benefit that philosophy can provide to the world.
[15:43] If you make it about you, people will reject you. Can you imagine going to a used car lot? You need a used car. And the guy's like, hey, man, you know, I got this hookers and blow habit. You got to buy the most expensive car on the lot because I really need the commission, man. Vixen with three axes is waiting for me down at the gentleman's club by the airport. And, you know, I need a little pound of bacon soda, if you know what I mean. This is the most expensive car. It's like 23 grand. It's the most expensive car we've got. My commission on that is a sweet 2300. I really need that. I'm going to blow it all tonight. Blow it. You get it? Blow. Anyway, I really, really need you to buy this fucking car because Desiree and Vixen with three X's are waiting for me, scissor kicking at the Gentleman's Club out by the airport. And and we've got special on 14 000 vats of specialized, pee diddy baby oil with pheromones so you got to buy this car for me do it for me man do it for me would you want to buy a car from someone who made it all about themselves and their needs no.
[17:00] A good salesman connects what they are selling to genuine legitimate helpful needs of the customers. Right? So if you're coming in and you've got 19 children, the guy's not going to sell you a sports car. If you're coming in as a young single man, he's not going to sell you a minivan because he's going to figure out what you might want and provide it. That's good sales. Sales is not about you. It's not even fundamentally about the product. It's about the benefit that the product can provide.
[17:35] The buyer. And dating is sales. You are selling yourself. So, if you have a cure for cancer that costs 50 bucks, and you go to someone with cancer, you're not afraid of getting rejected, because it's 50 bucks, and it cures their cancer. They're going to buy it, and they're going to thank you. They're going to send up hosannas to you To the very Elysium skies themselves? No problem.
[18:16] Now, if you had a cure for cancer for 50 bucks, someone's dying of cancer and you say, you know, I'm just, I'm too nervous to approach them. I don't want to. I mean, I'm probably overthinking this, but I just, I can't. I just, I can't. Don't make me. I can't do it. but I can't. My heart, like I can feel it pounding. It's like Mike Tyson trying to get out of the bone cage of my chest. It's just, I can't. So I'm going home. And you take your cancer cure and you go home and the guy dies of cancer. Aren't you an asshole for killing him with your insecurity? Not about you. Dating, talking to girls, talking to boys, not about you. Not about you. It's about the benefit you can provide to the other person. Now, if you don't believe in that benefit, go work on yourself until you believe in it. Don't pass along fraudulent gifts. Don't be a scam artist. Don't be a con artist. Don't pass along fraudulent gifts. Work on yourself until you have something of undeniable value to offer, and then don't be a selfish asshole and withhold your benefits from the world.
[19:43] Philosophy is not about me. It's about the benefit that philosophy can provide to you and the world as a whole. Oh, but I don't know if I'm eloquent enough. I don't know. I'm bald. I don't know. I don't know if I can do it. Oh, shut up. Go and provide your benefits to the world. Shut up and stop making it about yourself all the time and go and provide your benefits to the world. It's about the happiness you can bring to a good woman, and good man, and your children. It's not about you, you, you, you, all the, all the, all the time. It's exhausting. It's debilitating. Somebody's falling from a high, high, high building and you've got this giant inflatable thing. It just needs, you and your buddies need to push it over five feet so they don't die. And you're like, oh, I don't know. I mean, I don't know. I don't want to impose. I don't want to move it. Maybe somebody wants it to stay where it's dead. Dead. Good, good job. You're making it about you and somebody splats on the sidewalk.
[21:09] Well I do have fusion in a jar could solve all of the energy problems in the world I do have fusion in a jar I figured that out but I don't want to impose and I don't want people to think I'm being pushy and I don't want oh god, just shut up and go sell your fusion in a jar, stop making it about you it's about the happiness you can bring to someone now if you meet the girl and you can bring happiness to the girl, how dare you withhold that from her if she can bring happiness to you too? And usually it works that way that if you really bring happiness to someone, then they will bring happiness to you. But the reason why it's tough to talk to girls is you don't believe that you can bring value to someone. It's like asking for a raise when you've just spent the last year doing a shitty job. It's a little tough, right? Why am I so insecure asking for a raise? Well, because you set fire to the company warehouse three times in the last four months. And you're this close to getting fired. If you provide value to a woman, it's very selfish for you to withhold that value from her. I mean, really, in life.
[22:35] You just have to make one person very happy in order for your life to be completely worthwhile. Just one person. Make one person really, hopefully that person is a young man, a woman of childbearing age, and all of that kind of good stuff. Get kids out of it. Just make one person happy. That's it. Just make one person happy. and hopefully you know they make you happy and all of that i mean i love what i do but my greatest, pride and sense of meaning and happiness and joy comes from the fact that uh i make my wife very happy i make my daughter very happy i mean i make you guys happy too i hope although i know it sometimes it stings a little it's the same with me if it's any consolation just make make someone unhappy. Just go and go and make bring bring laughter. You know, like there's all these things on. Did I save one? You know, all of these lists, right? All of these lifts, lists that women have, right? I'm looking for a man in finance, six, four blue eyes.
[23:39] But I don't think I'll be able to find it can i search for it list okay i just tried to do a search and the screen just went blank wait did it go down to the bottom list oh there it is uh okay are you saying i have nothing uh wait uh deep deep voice.
[24:07] May 21st no i don't think that's it so there's this woman and she was uh she's a fan of some fitness girl and she's like i have this list you know uh over 510 deep voice good cheekbones and you know just list and listen list right and you know the lists are fun you know like when i was a kid, my brother and I used to be like, if we got a million pounds each, what would we buy? And we just made this list. You know, it's just kids making up nonsense, right? But, you know, if you're reasonably well put together, your teeth aren't yellow, you've got some decent skin, decent outfits, decent haircut, and you're an engaging conversationalist and you make her laugh, Her list goes out the window. The list is not life in this instance, right? The list is nonsense. It's just nonsense. It all goes out the window. You know, there's a pretty funny, what do they call it?
[25:27] When, Chad fishing, right? There's Chad fishing. So Chad fishing is when you get the picture of a really great guy, a really great looking guy, and you just wait for the women to swarm you, right? Like a really good looking guy, and you just wait for the women to swarm you. And so some guy who was an incel wanted to put out this theory say oh well uh you're an incel because, you have right-wing beliefs right you're you're a conservative right so this really good-looking guy was like yeah i'm a i'm a MAGA guy and the women are all like teehee that's fine right because he's good-looking right and or you're an incel because you don't have good personal hygiene and then this really good-looking guy was like yeah i don't bathe and the women are like teehee i bet you smell good anyway you know or maybe because you don't you don't have any charisma and so this guy said absolutely nothing of any intelligence nice weather i like sports like just complete nonsense and the women are like oh you're so much fun to chat with so it's all kind of funny right it's all just it's sad sad but uh but funny sad but funny.
[26:37] So you have something of value to offer or you don't, you, have something of value to offer now if you don't think you have something of value to offer any woman with any perception will know you're lying your ass off when you talk to her, you're the coke addict car dealer car sales dealer you don't want to be a car salesman coke addict car salesman don't be that guy it's gross it's gross and you'll only get self-loathing men or women.
[27:25] So, stop making it all about you and your thoughts and your feelings. If you can make the woman happy, stop being a jerk and withholding that from her. Again, I understand there's got to be... Oh yeah, the Chad guy, there was another Chad fishing, right? The guy posted that he was convicted of assault against his girlfriend, and the women didn't care. They didn't care.
[28:03] They didn't care. So a woman's list, it's just a filter for rage cells and the resentful. It's just a filter. That's all it is, just a filter. I have a list of preferences. differences. Well, I'm upset with that. Okay, so you're a hot-tempered guy who has no self-confidence and you're kind of angry at women, so, right? The list is, it's a wish list. It's comedy. It's not a real thing. It's not a real thing. And of course, we know that the list is not a real thing because the list never, never seems to include moral qualities. I've never seen any of these lists it's always finance chad jaw uh six foot two uh old money deep voice masculine intent funny cute charming witty it's never about honest courageous virtuous heart like it's never never about that so it's just it's a wish list it's like it is much relationship to women's actual dating strategies is like i don't know fantasy football pornography does i don't know.
[29:12] So
[29:16] So the way that you talk to women is you have something to offer you have something of value to offer and you like the girl, if you don't have something to offer don't talk to her don't talk to her otherwise you're just defrauding her don't do it, and if you don't think you have anything of value to offer women then you have to wait until you Accept and believe that. Right? Fix my loneliness is a hyena-like mating cry of the terminally depressed. Make me feel better about myself. I don't want to be lonely. Help me, help me, oh my God. And that literally is like, hey man, I need to get some drugs. Because, so buy my car. It's about your needs, your needs, your needs, right? No, thank you. No thank you.
[30:13] Work on having and adding value I mean I always had a very strong belief that I'd be a great, husband and a great dad I mean maybe not when I was a lot younger but certainly from my mid to late 20s onwards and certainly after therapy which I started in my late 20s so I was like yeah I'd be a good, I'd be a good dad I mean I knew I was good with kids because I worked in a daycare and they all adored me, as I really had great affection for them as well.
[30:47] And so I knew I was going to be good with kids. I knew I'd have a lot of fun as a dad. I knew I'd be a pretty good husband and a very good husband and all of that. Somebody says, we know women are lying when they say they want nice guys. Why believe them when they say they want six foot, six figures? No, no, no. So women want nice guys. Well, you know, that's a very bitter meme. It's like, how do I repel women? It's like, oh, just be nice. They hate that stuff. That's not true. No. Healthy women want nice guys. The women who say they want bad guys are not healthy. They are very unhealthy, very toxic. So don't worry about those people. Don't worry about those people. Don't worry about those people. They are advertising their dysfunction and they're helping you stay away.
[31:55] Alright let me get to your other questions and comments yeah of course there are the women women always want more pay and then they, always want men who make more than they do and it's like nope sorry every time you get more pay a man generally gets less pay so women want more pay and then a man who makes more more than they do and it's like i'm sorry i don't know uh i'll donate but it will need to wait until october okay i can wait i'm just kidding all right.
[32:34] Like, yeah, you're just going to have to pick a lane, right? If you want to make more money, that's fine. That's fine. But you really are going to have to accept that men aren't going to make as much money as you. Especially when you want the government to force employers to pay you more, right? Somebody says, this is from the last stream, I was listening recently to one of your shows, and you mentioned you love how Izzy interacts with authority figures. Can you name a particularly memorable example of Izzy interacting with an authority figure? I won't give any particular details, but in a situation of injustice where an acquaintance of hers was not able to stand up for herself, Izzy went very strong in making sure that the rather shy acquaintance got a fair settling of accounts. So she's very fierce that way, and I appreciate that. Stef, what do you think of debating parental responsibility in peaceful parenting with Andrew Wilson? Well, the problem is that Andrew Wilson and I would be dealing with a very different methodology. So I would be dealing with reason and evidence and empiricism, and he would be dealing with theological absolutes. So I'm not sure if we couldn't agree on that, and therefore the debate probably wouldn't go very far.
[33:52] All right. Boom, boom, boom. Boom, boom, boom. I would rather see Stef talk to Chris Williamson about more in-depth life stuff. Chris Williamson reminds me of a young Stef. Hey, that's younger. No, actually, it's young. All right. Did we talk already, Chris Williamson?
[34:18] Sorry, I'm just going to see if... Once in a lifetime, there is water underground, round the same as it ever was. Same as it ever was. Okay. So there's no questions there that I didn't get to. Oh, sneezy time. Is it sneezy time? Oh my. All right. Thank you for the tip. Uh, I'm not sure what it is about this conversation, but by god do i feel the need to distract myself even leave and go do chores or anything else even though i love the advice you're giving and i've been thinking of ways i can increase my value and what i bring to the table you don't have the right to withhold your gold from the world you just don't have that right it's wrong it's absolutely wrong you don't have the right do you know why because you only exist because other people did not withhold their value from the world So your existence is predicated on the fact that your ancestors were able to woo women and men.
[35:28] Well, wooing men isn't that hard. Woo! So, you only exist because your ancestors were not afraid to put their best foot forward and woo women. So, you don't have the right to withhold your value from women. Otherwise, you're just an exploiter. You're kind of parasitical, right? You're like vampiric on everybody else's courage. And then you make it all about yourself and fumble and choke. And that's the end of your bloodline. You owe it to your children to make a case for you as a father and a husband, you owe it to the next generation you owe it to the continuance of your bloodline civilization, the west, whatever you owe it it is a requirement it's not an option, well when I get over my you're only here because other people got over their bullshit so get over yours yours. Go fuck it up. Go fuck it up. I've crashed and burned numerous times in talking to girls. I mean, I told you the story about the first girl I asked out. Queen of the school, still remember her name. Queen of the school. I must have been 14 years old and I said, hey, would you like to go swimming? And she's like, with who? Ooh.
[36:51] Crashed and burned. First time around. Crashed and burned. So? So what? What's wrong with that? What's wrong with that? You want to wait to a guaranteed success before you try anything? Well, that's a great way to live in the grave long before you have to. You never want to live in the grave. You want to want to be dead meat when you go in the grave. Somebody says I have a lot of anxiety about my career and having children. Just had my first. I'm away from home for 12 to 16 days a month, and I'm worried it's going to be a problem for secure attachment of my sweet baby girl. My career treats me well, and I'm happy here, but I don't know how to navigate this challenge. Well, just ask for more time at home. Just ask for more time at home.
[37:56] I talked to Chris Williamson in 2020 did I did I how exciting you know you've done a lot of interviews when, guy creates fake hot criminal tinder profile to make a point and it goes horribly right oh this is from 2019 it's when I was uh I read more. Chad, 29. Sup i'm chad you don't like me too bad things you should know about me because you all see the ankle monitor.
[38:37] Nice nice oh my gosh, and the girls just, chad takes a super aggressive approach with this next tinder match basically telling her to hurry up and read his profile so they could get the unpleasantness out of the way and get straight to smashing. Which is sex, right? That's pretty funny. Oh my gosh. The best is safe for last, however, when one of his matches completely blows past the criminal aspect. Oh my gosh.
[39:20] So she says reddit that for real or joke or what it's real it was only one kid he was eight and my mind felt oh god oh god oh that's horrible and she says wow not really sure what to say i guess it's cool how you being honest about it though yep so what are you doing right about now anything cool oh just bored bored and on tinder looking for fun and stuff yourself are you from and then and she just goes on. Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh. That's, um... You know, I'm telling you, I said this, like, I said this a show or two ago. Chivalry's gone, because female nature, at least in its current incarnation, is being revealed, it's just being revealed to bear to people.
[40:12] I'm a pilot, it. So that's impossible without a career change. Yeah, well, just, you know, I'm sure you get time off and spend as much time as you can. All right. Hi, Stef, I just had a job interview with an absolutely amazing manager, a total contrast from mine, the job pays considerably more as well. I'm really hoping to get the job looking back, what would the signs be that this manager was interested? Well, I, I don't know, but there's a very passive approach. I don't, sorry, maybe I'm misunderstanding something. So I assume that you called up the manager and said, that was an absolutely fantastic interview. I'm dying to work for you. I know I can provide a huge amount of value. I'm on tender hooks. If there's anything else you need to know, I'd be happy to answer any and all questions. Hire me. I will work like a Turk or whatever, like whatever you're going to say. So why would you be passive about this?
[41:18] So, why would you be passive? Yeah, Hitler's translated speeches are going viral these days. And people are incredibly skeptical about history as a whole, having lived through COVID and so on. People are incredibly skeptical. I think that skepticism can sometimes go too far. But, yeah, people are just, I think one of the, you know, I mean, there are upsides and downsides, of course, to skepticism, right? You can become overly cynical, overly skeptical, and so on. but i think when people see how much they've been lied to over the last couple of years what they're doing is looking back over the course of history and saying i mean hitler was a totally evil guy and a totalitarian and you know destroyed half of europe and all of that so but people are going back and they're saying oh my god if i've been lied to about this what else might i have been lied to and you know they're exploring that so that's one of the consequences some of which which can be quite terrible, of people seeing lies in the history they're living, and then they're curious about how far back this all might go. And there can be a real rabbit hole that can lead to some bad places for sure, but that's just the inevitable result of this.
[42:30] All right, let me just get to questions or comments. Yeah, sorry, I'm a tiny, tiny bit low energy today. Today, I did two long and really challenging call-in shows. Thank you, Dorpens. I appreciate that. Yeah, I did two long and challenging call-in shows today.
[43:04] What is that? What is that you are? What is that you are doing? Oh, Modern Wisdom. Okay, so Modern Wisdom is the podcast. And why YouTube deleted my 1 million subscriber channel? It was probably well over 2 million, except they kept suppressing it also. Thanks Stef just donated at free domain dot com slash donate thank you thank you thank you I appreciate that very very kind good looking guy, should probably do that again rating explicit that's right explicit nippletastic philosophy is in the house.
[43:55] Alright All right. Any other last questions, comments, challenges, issues, problems, praise, condemnation, salvation, desperation. All right. I discussed my value. I listened to a podcast from years ago about landing a dream job and how making the case for the value one can bring is very powerful and important in this process. He did ask one situational question where I told him I needed to think a bit more. We got back to it later and I gave a good answer, though I'm just worried that messed me up. No, if it's right, you can't mess it up. If it's a good fit and he's a good manager, you can't mess it up.
[44:47] Yeah, I mean, I read some biographies of Hitler when I was working on my novel, almost, because I really wanted to try and capture the hellscape of the Weimar Republic in that novel, and the rise of Nazism. So, yeah, I think, thank you very much, I appreciate that. So it is uh you know people are people are curious and and this again the skepticism you know once once you break that dam and people realize that there's been a lot of big lies in society they're gonna go looking for more and whether they'll find them or not that's uh that's a journey man that's a journey i mean i remember um uh churchill in the unnecessary war i did a show on this like i don't know 17 years ago uh about a lot of the lies about world war ii and, that's uh that's pretty wild stuff, yeah because if if the lies are right here right the lies are right up against your face, who's to say that they aren't further away right the idea that you're being lied like let me ask you this because maybe we can make it a little bit more personal so that we can sort of understand it at this level. Have you...
[46:05] Hey, Stef, just wanted to let you know the quality of the show hasn't wavered a bit. I haven't donated in a while due to financial worries. I appreciate that, and I know, man. Everybody, please know that I understand that, and I sympathize, and please don't donate what you can't afford. Absolutely not. Keep that for yourself and all of that. But anything that's been on your mind lately, Stef? Oh, yeah. Everything and always, all the time. It's quite a carnival in here. Um so if you've ever had someone, lie, to you a big lie a big lie i was thinking because there was one in a call-in show recently but it was a private call-in show so i won't talk about it but if you've ever had someone just a giant lie, then what happens is you look back don't you skeptically over the entire relationship, like if you've been married for 20 years and you realize your wife cheated on you twice over the last year don't you look back and say oh my god what was going on before right, if you've been in a relationship for 20 years and you find out that someone has some big terrible secret right, then.
[47:26] Don't you look back and say oh my god, if they can keep this secret what other secrets are they keeping, how much have they been lying to me right, so this is what's going on in society at the moment, this is the consequence, everything is now in question because so many lies have been told so many lies have been told.
[47:50] So many lies have been told. That everything is now open to question.
[48:07] Did we ever publish this to our channel? I deleted my one million subscriber channel. So, yeah, all right. Somebody says, yeah, even aliens, UFOs, flat earth, reptilian overlords, the chemtrails, like, people are just like, oh, my God, like, we've been lied to about so much. What have we not been lied to about? And that's, you know, that's really kicking things open that formerly were accepted, right? Right. Somebody says, when you were in the private sector, how did you receive corrections or improvement feedback from peers or reports, people below you? As a solopreneur now, what is your opinion about feedback? I recall you asking for feedback from us listeners and even your daughter, so I guess you welcome it from people who work for you. Am I right? Yeah. I mean, I think, James, you can say that I'm pretty often saying, how's it going working with me? Is there anything that I can do better or different or anything you need support on or anything that you'd like to work on to make your day working with me more enjoyable or anything like that, right? So, yeah, I mean, I'm always looking for feedback. That's, you know, I always say with the show, you know, feedback, thoughts, comments, questions, issues, you know, whatever I can improve. And, you know, every couple of months I'll certainly do a big question about.
[49:29] James says, absolutely requesting feedback. Yeah, I always want to know how I can do things better. I'm proud of what I do and optimistic about how I can improve. It's a tough balance, right? Because you want to say that I can improve without saying I'm not doing a quality job now, right? So I'm doing the maximum quality. At all times, I try to do the maximum quality in a sustainable fashion, right? The maximum quality and always try to improve. And that tension is, to me, what keeps things... Keeping it spicy. Keeping it spicy.
[50:02] Oh, with regards to this, yeah, I look back and try and trace potentially when the person started to lie. Yeah, for sure. I'm pretty sure Keith Knight believes in chemtrails. I found a website where you can build book collections, and Keith's collection had a few books about geoengineering. I think chemtrails are real. China and Dubai openly admit weather modifications. I do think, I know that China and Dubai have admitted weather modification for sure.
[50:34] So, I did a whole show on chemtrails recently, which you can look up. Yeah. It is kind of creepy watching these mosquitoes drop from planes. I just find that feels very dystopian to me. So, yeah. But what I do know is that there are vapor trails. I mean, that for sure I know. And planes crisscrossing and the vapor trails, that I understand. And they do come and they do start and stop depending on the thermoclines of the temperature or differently layered air temperatures and so on, right? So thermoclines, I think that's water. Anyway, you know, so they do start and stop depending on various factors. So, you know, some of that, I think, is people thinking, oh, they're flipping a switch and so on. But I think some of that's more natural, so.
[51:32] All right. Yeah, contrails, that's right. The government admitted to chemtrails in Vietnam. It's just a matter of scale. scale well again it uh it wouldn't surprise me you know i i made a video as you know called the case against china during covid i got a lot of expertise in that and uh but even i was a bit surprised when i mean a bunch of stuff went missing in calgary and people that that really went down the memory hole and that uh it seems that uh america was funding the french built wuhan, lab, which has about the same level of security as your average dentist's office. Not kidding about that. Even I was surprised that the US was funding, or appears to have been funding bioweapons in China. That's wild.
[52:27] And that totally destroys any sort of left-right and free market and communist distinction. All right, let's see here. What am I? Messenaya. All right.
[52:54] Chemtrails has put out to don't a preview of quite the queue on Q&As to general. Yeah, for sure. Wuhan is weird as hell that's where the scrap metal from 9-1 9-11 went is that right as a pilot contrails are normal chemtrails as they're called are real but there's lots of misinformation on how it works yeah I mean I'm aware that contrails are normal but yeah.
[53:21] It's the idea that they put it on commercial planes, that they just have these chemicals or sprays on commercial planes, and they attach it to the wings, and then the pilots flip a switch. I think that would be pretty tough. I think that'd be pretty tough to keep quiet. I mean, I think that would be pretty tough. I mean, lots of retired pilots would just, the last couple of days of work, they'd just take, here's where we flip on the chemtrails, and here's where we flip off, and so on and so on. Because, you see, commercial, isn't it? They talk about commercial flights, right? So, again, I'm not an expert on this. Oh, it's private aircraft? Right.
[53:58] And nth-dimensional reptiles I struggle with, but chemtrails my brain can understand. Yeah, it's like the lizard necks and so on. And I think those are just video artifacts from compression and so on, right? Yo, Stef, big donation coming a few hundred from me, getting my first YouTube paycheck of about 4K late October. Well, I'm very happy for you. I'm very happy for you that you're getting paid from YouTube. Can you believe it? Like back in the day, you used to have 6,000 or 7,000 people watching a live stream, and I'd get super chats from that. Isn't that wild? Isn't that wild? But I still like the jazz club, what can I tell you? But thank you. I really, really appreciate that. Whereas the art bell was right jar. Yeah, yeah, for sure. Yeah. Can the government of Canada was funding. Somebody says was funding gain of research or similar research in Saskatchewan with Chinese links. Well, I think it was Winnipeg. I think it was Winnipeg.
[54:56] Yeah, I don't think there's any limit to the amount of creepy stuff that goes on in the bowels of statism. I really don't think that there's any particular limit to it. It's pretty wild. It's pretty wild. And by the way, sorry, I mean, all openness and appreciation, your success on YouTube is wonderful. And I'm actually thrilled for you. I'm absolutely thrilled for you. And well done. Well done. on. If you want to share your channel here, I'm sure people would appreciate it. Torben says, Stef, much appreciated for the call-in show with the woman whose sister was addicted to drugs and her evil parents. I'll be leaving a comment under the show soon, just gathering my thoughts on why it was so powerful. Yeah, I'm doing some crackerjack call-in shows lately. I did one with a woman yesterday where I was trying to get her to open her heart to her children. Ooh, that was something. yeah that was something I'm sure that'll go out at some point over the next week or two but yeah I've been doing some pretty wild call-in shows lately it's very good good call-in shows lately.
[56:01] You'll be ordering a private call soon as well yeah the private calls are pretty spicy uh because I can be pretty pretty frank without having to worry about being sliced and diced and misinterpreted so yeah the private calls are very good in my in my humble opinion I think they're very important so you can get those of course at freedomain.com slash call freedomain.com, slash call, alright any other last questions, comments issues, challenges sorry I'm not going to do a super long show tonight but I did like six hours of call-ins today so I'm a little full how much are they? Just talk to me on I'm still half and half, it's sort of an introductory price at the moment, it's probably going to go up because everyone's like oh that's so little, I was expecting more so just contact me on using the website and we'll talk about it from there.
[56:50] Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. Yeah, I don't want to talk about a price here because when it changes, people will get mad. It's the kind of thing, you know, I was just realizing the other day that I haven't raised in, I don't even know how long, like half a decade or more. I haven't, like it's still three bucks a month, five bucks a month. I haven't raised it. So I may at some point have to up that just a smidge as well because otherwise, you know, the income decays.
[57:27] Let's see here. I'm very happy that the world seems to be gradually taking an ANCAP slow turn. Do you see that as well? Yes, absolutely. Javier is doing a lot. And even Mark Zuckerberg has come out as a quasi-libertarian. Well, that was kind of predictable, though. So how is it somewhat predictable that Mark Zuckerberg was going to come out as more of a libertarian? A friend of mine did a private call and said it was the best money he had ever spent well thank you i appreciate that and do thank your friend uh for that, so uh yes how is it predictable, yeah he started working out that's right yeah he started working out i assume maybe he's taking in some DHEA or TRT or I don't know, I don't know, whatever, right? But yeah, I mean, the fact that he's just started to work out heavily, you don't know what your beliefs are when you've got noodle arms. Like, you don't know. You don't know if you're just frightened of any assertiveness because you can get your ass kicked up and down the school hallway. You don't know what you actually believe if your body is weak.
[58:44] So, out of curiosity, how long is the average wait time for a private call? Oh, not too bad, actually. You'd be surprised. All right. I showed my wife the 2012 movie Les Mis yesterday. Thoughts on it? Oh, I thought it was terrible. I thought it was absolutely, completely, and totally terrible. It was appalling. I have an amazing soft spot for the, well, I love the, I mean, Victor Hugo was called the master of human tears. He was so good at evoking emotion in his writing. And I love the novel Les Mis and I have an absolutely deep and special place in my heart. You, he thinks that man is me, knew him at a glance. It's really a great musical and it was really the first musical that I loved.
[59:31] It really is the first musical that I fell in love with. And this is because I dated a woman who was really into musicals. And she got me into even chess, the musical, which is a pretty wild idea for a musical, just chess tournaments. I'm going to be the witness to the ultimate test of cerebral fitness.
[59:55] Murray Head. Anyway, so I absolutely love the musical. Colin wilkinson moves me beyond words he played the priest although he originally he originated the role of jean valjean 24601 yeah and his falsetto and bring them home bring him home is just fantastic and and yulrus and uh beautiful i remember when i was working up north the woman that i was this is before we were dating but we were sort of flirting with each other, and uh she said who's better at revolution and she she gave me that you know you say you want a revolution well you know the john lennon one and which is kind of hippy dippy uh and then she's like uh red the blood of angry like that's a better revolutionary song out of les mis than uh the stinky old noodle-armed John Lennon, right? So I have a huge soft spot for the play Les Mis. I've only seen it once. I saw it in New York many years ago, and it was just amazing. It was just amazing. And yet the woman I went with who I was dating at that point was so moved that she almost couldn't breathe afterwards because it's a beautiful vision of heroism and strength and honor and defense of the weak and promotion of virtue you and, and so on. But I really hated the movie. And I hated the movie because it's.
[1:01:23] The director had people sing the songs over and over and over again, and they sounded bad. Even really good singers like Hugh Jackman and Anne Hathaway, people who are really good singers. And even Russell Crowe, who actually was in a band when he was younger, was not a bad singer, but just sounded terrible.
[1:01:41] They went more for big names in acting, and they should have sung it in a studio and lip synced it so that it sounds beautiful. Beautiful you don't want it to be here's here's like someone singing in the street nobody sounds good same freddie mercury sounds like crap singing in the street you got to get little echo studios some my god make it sound beautiful make the recordings as beautiful as the music is but instead the director was like sing it again again more again and it's like oh my god horrendous, horrendous so yeah i thought it was a absolutely uh appallingly uh bad And I don't think Hugh Jackman was the guy I really don't Hugh Jackman was not the guy for it You need somebody barrel-chested like Carl Malkinson.
[1:02:33] Can you hear the people sing Sing the songs of angry men It is the music of a people Who will not be slaves again Oh, it's great stuff, When the beating of your heart echoes the beating of the drum. Ah, so good. There is a light about to break when tomorrow comes. Mm, so good. Um.
[1:03:11] Ah, so good. Will you join in our crusade? Who will be strong and stand with me? Beyond the barricade, is there a world you long to see? Oh, so good. So good. So, yeah. All right. Not many good movies these days that are not just blatant propaganda. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, 2016, 2017 was like the crossover year after that. It all went to crap. All right. Thank you for what you do and creating a community where three thinkers can gather. Well, thank you. I appreciate that. Thank you for being here. The Silicon Valley people are also being recruited, says someone by Peter Thiel, to set up this government structure based on the thoughts of Mencius Moldbug, a.k.a. Curtis Marvin. It's called neo-reaction slash neo-cameralism. The idea is a mega-CEO as philosopher king.
[1:04:19] What's your take on revisionist history? I saw a podcast with Douglas Murray getting defensive about people being critical about Winston Churchill's actions during World War I. Oh, Winston Churchill with Gallipoli. I mean, I know something about Churchill. I read, I can't even tell you how many books on Churchill, because he's a character in my novel almost. So yeah, what he did in Gallipoli and in World War One was absolutely appalling and disastrous.
[1:04:49] Or french versions for oscar phantom of the opera i thought the first half was good i thought the second half was just retarded all right um yeah the the i love it when they layer over the songs uh and they all work together uh just gives you goosebumps right are you looking forward to the am i racist movie um i mean i i'll probably watch it at some point but, But, you know, it's such an obvious grift, and so obviously hypocritical, that it's sort of like, you know, Democrats are the real racist stuff. It doesn't really mean much to me. There is a life about to start when tomorrow comes. Yeah, so good. So good. that that's like divinely inspired music did the guy from the rage call and ever talk about regret and send you a message i really couldn't tell you i'm so sorry i'm so sorry and not too many people get back to me about prior call-ins and um it's a little tough to remember because you just listen to it and so it's fresh in your mind but uh i live very much in the moment when it comes to call-ins so all right uh last questions comments challenges issues.
[1:06:14] It must be, to be able to sing like Holm Wilkinson, he actually did a whole album, Broadway songs, It Ain't Necessarily So, and Summertime, and it's just, ah, beautiful. Just beautiful. Just beautiful. Yeah, I mean, the racism stuff, the Marxists didn't have any luck with class, so they just went with sex, and then when that burned out, they went with race, and they're just always was trying to find ways to set people against each other in course divisions so it feels feels very old hat to me if that makes sense.
[1:06:51] Matt is subconsciously principled, but not as rational. Otherwise, you guys are similar, I think. Yeah, and it's a good family man, for sure. Seems to be a good family man.
[1:07:04] All right. Well, thanks, everyone, so much for dropping by. Sorry it's not a super long show tonight, but we will, of course, talk Sunday morning. And we'll do the first hour open, and then the second hour we'll do downer only, because there's a couple of things I'd like to talk about that are not really for the public eye. So let's get to that on Sunday, 11 a.m. If you want to join the community, freedomain.locals.com or freedomain.com, sorry, or yeah, freedomain.com slash donate. Great communities at subscribestar.com slash freedomain and freedomain.locals.com. Just great, great stuff. Great people to chat with. And I hope that you'll avail yourself of that community. And I will get out to everyone this weekend. The people who've donated, you get the History of Philosophers series. I'm sorry I've been a few days late in getting that out. I will get that out to everyone. It's not an automated process, but I'm sure I'll find ways to make it. So thanks for a glorious evening. I appreciate that. Love you guys for being here, and we'll talk soon. Bye.
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