My Marriage is Worth FIVE DOLLARS! Transcript


0:00 - Introduction
1:27 - Starting Small, Building Resistance
2:36 - Overcoming Excuses and Taking Action
3:53 - Credibility in Health Advice
6:51 - The Impact of Personal and Professional Contexts
9:45 - Objectivity in Health Advice Giving
14:09 - Support and Appreciation
17:52 - Efficiency vs. Empathy in Health Advice
22:30 - Acknowledgment of Support and Progress
24:59 - Balancing Personal and Professional Perspectives
27:37 - Productivity vs. Comfort
30:01 - Pushing Boundaries for Performance
32:55 - Embracing Discomfort for Improvement
36:48 - Balancing Artistic Vision and Sensitivity
39:29 - Intriguing Movie Industry Insights
44:34 - Understanding Female Social Circles
58:27 - Pressures on Women to Provide Resources
1:10:53 - Lack of Trust and Betrayal in Female Relationships
1:23:18 - Individual Competition in the Sexual Market
1:24:30 - Influence and Propaganda in Social Dynamics
1:25:09 - Reproductive Strategies
1:37:07 - Room with a View
1:50:14 - Renewing Closeness and Vulnerability
1:53:10 - Value of Marriage: $5
1:55:48 - Defining Monetary Value
1:58:49 - Cost of Divorce
2:03:20 - Standoffish Vibe
2:03:58 - Male Interaction with Children

Long Summary

In this podcast episode, we explore the concept of strength of temptation as a measure of virtue. I draw a comparison between resisting temptation and weightlifting, suggesting that starting with small temptations and gradually increasing resistance can lead to virtuous behavior. We delve into the significance of practicing resistance with smaller temptations before taking on larger ones, highlighting the importance of personal growth through challenges. Listeners share their recent virtuous challenges, including difficult conversations with family members about their behavior, sparking a candid exchange of experiences.

Transitioning into discussions on health advice, we scrutinize the credibility of guidance from individuals struggling with obesity and addiction, igniting a debate on balancing professionalism and personal struggles. The conversation leads to a gendered exploration of addressing personal challenges and offering health advice, shedding light on the different perspectives and societal expectations placed on men and women.

Delving deeper, we address the importance of segregating personal and professional contexts, utilizing examples to underscore the significance of understanding context in various situations. The complexities of women's friendships come under scrutiny, with a focus on the lasting impact of betrayal in female relationships. We examine the challenges women face in admitting fault, linking past experiences to present behaviors and the struggles of building trust due to past betrayals.

The dialogue progresses to dissect the dynamics of male-female relationships, delving into the challenges of admitting fault and the varying behaviors between genders. Reflections on the impact of societal expectations on behavior and the role of trust in conflict resolution are shared. The discussion extends to the intricacies of gender roles and societal norms in shaping interpersonal interactions, offering valuable insights into the nuances of communication and behavior.

Exploring the concept of Schrodinger's feminist, we unpack the complexities of women's behaviors in the context of traditional gender roles and feminist ideals. Themes of honesty, morality, and attraction are explored, alongside discussions on competence display in attracting mates and the implications of competition and loyalty in relationships. The conversation navigates the contrast between men and women's responses to failures, highlighting the multifaceted nature of gender dynamics and interpersonal relationships.

Shifting focus to financial responsibility, I emphasize the importance of prudent financial planning and personal accountability. I question the mindset of those who complain about grocery costs while potentially making poor financial decisions, stressing the significance of saving for unforeseen circumstances. A listener's dilemma of offering a $5 tip to save his marriage sparks a conversation on assigning value to relationship advice, societal stereotypes around men interacting with children, and the dynamics of stay-at-home fathers in societal contexts. As the episode concludes, gratitude is expressed to the audience, encouraging active engagement with the show's community platforms.


[0:00] Introduction

[0:00] Good morning, everybody. Welcome to your Sunday morning live. What have we got here? The 28th of April 2024. And it's the strength of temptation, a measure of virtue. It's the strength of temptation, a measure of virtue. Oh, it's a test of virtue. I mean, if you think of virtue as bench pressing, right? To bench press five pounds, not that big a deal. It doesn't show that you're strong. It shows that you're not paralyzed, but it doesn't show that you're particularly strong.

[0:47] But if you can bench press 200 pounds, you're probably quite strong, 300 pounds or whatever, right? And so what I would say is that if you have some resistance to temptation, it shows that you have a moral sense. And then the stronger your resistance to temptation, the stronger your virtue.

[1:15] And generally, you want to work up to temptations, resistance. Like in the same way, you don't just start benching 200 pounds the first time you walk into the gym. You start off small and you get larger, right? You get stronger.

[1:27] Starting Small, Building Resistance

[1:27] And it's the same thing with temptations. You want to practice on the little temptations before you go on to the very big ones. Start small, work your way up. Everybody wants to start at the top, right? I'm going to control. We're going to audit the Fed. It's like, yeah, okay. Have you talked to people about corruption and virtue and child abuse in your own life? No, because the Fed's what's really important. It's like, okay, this is like Fafhrd and the Gray Mouser, the curse of the smalls and the the stars it's a science fiction i guess a fantasy novel that i read a short story that i read many years ago where fafford and the gray mouser were it's like a typical kind of thief slash big dumb fighter combo and they got hit with a curse where they were either obsessed with tiny details like the puddle on a table or obsessed with the largest abstractions and nothing in between.

[2:20] So the curse of the smalls and the stars. People either focus on inconsequential things or on giant things that they can't control. Nobody wants to focus on the actionable items of corruption and immorality in their own lives.

[2:36] Overcoming Excuses and Taking Action

[2:37] And taking away that excuse from people has been one of the great glories and incitements, in a sense, of this conversation. All right, tell me the last virtuous, I would say quite dangerous, but virtuous challenging thing you did. What was the last virtuous challenging thing you did? Where you just screwed your courage to the sticking place as they say in Macbeth and did the right thing told the truth about something.

[3:22] What did you do, hello everyone says someone the chain broke on my bike mid-ride so So I get to be here and hear the goat himself. Thank you. Confronting my sister on the way she's parenting? Good for you, Taylor. Magnificent. Beautiful. Wonderful.

[3:53] Credibility in Health Advice

[3:53] So good for you. I mean, this is the kind of stuff, if you can't do that stuff, I really don't care what you have to say about anything else. You know, if you can't do that stuff, right? Confronting my female friend that she is manipulating her younger sister by using force, good for you. Confronting parents regarding childhood long ago, good for you. Good for you.

[4:30] But that's the stuff that you should be working on, right? So the inconsequential stuff, let me sort of give you an analogy. You said, stuck my foot in the ground where my career progression was threatened by a diversity hire.

[4:48] So, have you ever seen someone, often a woman, but maybe correct, have you ever seen someone in a restaurant with a ridiculously calorie-dense meal, somebody who's obese in a restaurant, with a ridiculously calorie-dense meal who also orders a Diet Coke. You know, they got a good two grand worth of calories in dinner or three grand. I remember when we were in the States, my daughter and I used to have a game of find the highest calorie item on the menu. And certainly, I mean, it's true in Canada, of course, but in America, some of the numbers are truly jaw-dropping. So, if you see people do this, right, and sometimes if you're behind someone in the lineup at a fast food place, they'll be like, you know, I'll get two bacon double cheeseburgers, a large order of fries, a sundae, and a Diet Coke. So, that might be missing the forest for the trees, right? No, no, I had a Diet Coke.

[6:06] So, that's a detail that's missing the big picture. I also remember getting into an odd argument with a friend of mine. I don't know, this has got to be like 30 plus years ago. There was, I'm not trying to pick on women, it's just what I happened to notice. There was an obese woman who had her makeup done nicely, her hair done nicely, and she had, like, I don't know, what is it with the fetish for like LED nails for women? I don't understand that. I don't understand that. And I remember I just said to my friend, you know, like, she should probably work on her weight before she works on all this other stuff, right?

[6:51] The Impact of Personal and Professional Contexts

[6:51] Like, it really doesn't, if you're like 300 pounds, I'm not sure that it hugely matter what hairstyle you're wearing. Or whether your nails have little Christmas trees painted on them, or whether your makeup is done well at all.

[7:10] I just, and I remember him like, well, you know, you got to start with somewhere and you've got to work with what you have and this, that, and the other. And I don't know, man, there's these two poles in, in human society that I find really interesting and I, I get both sides. So somebody posted on X the other day, a picture of a very obese, I assume she was a nurse, right? And is it just me? Is it tough to find a normal weight nurse on the planet? maybe this is just me, maybe this is just me is it tough to find a normal weight nurse on this planet, and why I mean they work in the healthcare field I assume they see quite a lot what happens to obese people later on in life, is it am I just drawing the short straw or the short and wide straw every time it just seems kind of odd like why there would be so many Wildly overweight nurses. Maybe, maybe it's just me. So somebody posted a picture of a truly like wildly obese nurse.

[8:25] And there were people who were, and the caption was, the caption was, nobody who looks like this should be giving anybody health advice, right? Right? Nobody who looks like this should be giving anybody health advice. And I kind of get it. Now, of course, you can say the doctor who smokes can tell you not to smoke. I get all of that. Right? And so you see this sharply divided worldview where people are like, yes, you know, that's gross, that's a huge waste of scarce resources, that's unhealthy, and you lack credibility when you tell other people. And also, can an obese nurse be truly objective about your eating habits and your weight? Right? That's a big question. if somebody has, and that level of obesity is a rampant self-destructive food addiction. It's a rampant self-destructive food addiction.

[9:33] So when a woman who's slightly overweight comes in and says she's dieting, what is the reaction of the obese nurse? It could be a male or female nurse.

[9:45] Objectivity in Health Advice Giving

[9:45] What is there how much can they tell someone you need to eat less you need to diet you need to exercise like how much is there not a barrier to them giving really good objective health advice, i think there is i think there is Can someone who is a rampant alcoholic help other people quit alcohol? I assume not, right?

[10:22] My niece is a nurse, someone, and is working on dieting. She says, nurses constantly say people should take care of themselves, but when she asks, shouldn't we take care of ourselves, they shut down and turn cold towards her. They're not allowed to do that anymore, otherwise they lose their jobs. It's like a personal trainer with no muscle giving advice on how to build muscle. Yeah, is it the case that if someone with really bad skin says, says use this treatment or this lifestyle change or whatever to clear up your skin is that not something you wouldn't believe, sorry that's kind of a double negative but isn't that kind of a credibility issue.

[11:08] Can a morbidly obese health practitioner give you objective advice about diet and exercise exercise. I don't know that they can. I mean, this is just a psychology thing as far as I would understand it. I'm not a psychologist, but it would seem to me that you would have trouble with that, wouldn't you? If you're currently in the throes of an addiction, can you give any objective advice about that addiction? I don't think so. I don't think so. I mean, In some places, as far as I understand it, if you're a psychologist and you're going through a divorce, you're strongly discouraged, if not outright banned, from giving couples counseling.

[12:02] So this, you know, nobody who looks like this should be giving people health advice. There's, it's, it's harshly put. And you know, that's, as a guy, I don't, I don't care about that. I mean, this, this tone policing stuff is not a guy thing, but I kind of get where the argument is coming from. But then of course, other people are like, you just don't know the struggle she had. She might be down 20 pounds and feeling good about herself. You don't know what her life history is. You don't know everything that led up to this. You don't know this, you don't know that. And it's like, I get both sides. I get both sides but I think the difference is, that the one side is the side of a friend and the other side is the side of a customer, so if you have a friend who's morbidly obese obese, yes, they went through some stuff, they have some problems, they have an addiction, and so on, right? Okay.

[13:12] That would be a friend's perspective. But this guy wasn't talking about the morbidly obese nurse in the context of being her friend, but rather being her customer. Because if somebody's morbidly obese and is trying to tell you how to be healthy, Either they don't know, or they're not able to achieve it. So in other words, they can't give you advice on how to achieve it because they're unable to achieve it themselves.

[13:44] Do what I say, which is the opposite of what I do, is tough, right? You know, I don't give people advice on hair restoration, right? So it's funny because some people look at that as a customer, right?

[14:09] Support and Appreciation

[14:09] Uh, let me just, sorry. Um, I've been, uh, Jody says, I've been listening to you off and on for maybe 10 years. I've enjoyed your consistent level of humility. I also enjoy your brainchild universally preferable behavior. Thank you. May you have a blessed Sunday today. Thank you. Part of the blessing is having you guys here. And I really do appreciate that. So, what happens is, some people look at this and say that somebody who is morbidly obese, I mean, we're not just talking plump, I mean, like, really, really, really fat. Somebody who's morbidly obese probably shouldn't be giving health advice. Because there's just kind of a credibility issue, right?

[15:00] It's just a credibility issue because they don't know how to achieve it. And someone can't be objective about their own addiction. If you doubt whether someone can be objective about their own addiction, just try going on social media and pointing out how bad marijuana is for you and then see how objective people are if they're habitual marijuana users. They're not. Nature's herb and you're square and you can't do this and you can't relax and you know, you're, you know, it's all natural and all of that, right? And you can't be objective about that, but you're addicted to. And obesity isn't just overeating, it's the avoidance of movement. So if you're avoiding moving and you're overeating by a staggering amount, out, like it takes a lot to get that heavy, then you can't help anybody in the health journey that involves movement and exercise, movement and dieting, movement and sensible eating.

[16:11] Somebody says, my sister snapped at me when I told her that her obese alcoholic girlfriend was a bad influence. So maybe your sister's a bad influence on you who were you to tell her to drop bad influences if you're continuing to chat with your mean sister, ah physician heal thyself everybody always points at everyone else and their problems and their bad behavior and it's like what are you modeling you're modeling.

[16:42] Always look at yourself first man oh man we're just talking about this right because we're just talking about this so the people who look at the obese nurse the picture of the obese nurse and they say she shouldn't be giving health advice are looking at it from a consumer business standpoint point. Oh, that was a while ago. I no longer talk to her for many reasons. Okay. Got it. So I appreciate the correction. So they're looking at it from what is best for the customers. What is best for the general health? They're looking at it from a job standpoint. They're looking at her as a facilitator of health for her customers, right? That's what, and then, and then there's That's this flip, which is a complete lack of professionalism, where people are saying, ah, but her struggles and her childhood and her this and her that, of course. Of course. But that's not a business relationship. And honestly, in general, it's a male-female thing, right?

[17:52] Efficiency vs. Empathy in Health Advice

[17:52] So the men are looking and saying, well, this person wouldn't have any credibility in giving health advice, right?

[18:06] And the women are like, oh, but her feels and her history and her past and her trauma and her this and her that. And it's like, sure, but that's the job of her friends. That's not the job of the business and the customers. When she's working, right? Greetings from Finland. Hello, Finland. Let's see here. Telling my ex's mother to encourage her daughter to get a paternity test ASAP after her telling me that it can't be my child because she's further along. What? Telling my ex's mother to encourage her daughter to get a paternity test, after telling me... Oh, okay, got it, got it. I'm sorry about that. What a mess. What are you involved with these people to begin with? Dread Pirate says, I saw some people that showed the people... I saw, sorry, I saw some data that showed that people are eating less and exercising more than they have in recent decades and obesity is skyrocketing. The cause has to be something else. But you wouldn't want to take obesity data as a blob. High IQ people are generally slender. So it has a lot to do with IQ stuff, right? I mean, IQ is falling as a whole. And so people are, right?

[19:34] The Diet Coke excuse is they're diabetic. But shouldn't they then be eating better as a whole? If you're diabetic, I'm no doctor or nutritionist, but shouldn't you just be eating better as a whole rather than eating all of this processed crap at fast food restaurants? What do I know? But that would be my first thought or question.

[20:00] So I think this is where social conversations just get stalled in the male-female sphere because the males are saying, this is inefficient, this is bad for people as a whole. And the women are like, but the feelings and the history and the trauma and the sadness. I get that, the history and the feelings and the trauma and the sadness, yes. yes, this nurse did not become obese because she was raised in a loving, happy, healthy family. I get that for sure. And the research that I've done for peaceful parenting shows that sexual abuse a lot of times leads to obesity because women, in particular, it happens to men as well, that they want to create a physical shield to be less attractive because being attractive, was historically dangerous for them. I get all of that. I get all of that. but is it still the right thing for a person who's morbidly obese to be giving health advice to other people.

[21:09] Hello tear nice to see you this morning and so the male perspective is look i mean okay so she's she's sad and and she's had a tough life and i i get all of that and she but she's also made bad choices right it's also made bad choices because here's the funny thing you never see this with i don't know something like racism or homophobia right you never say well but the person might have had experiences that lead them one direction or another you know whatever right maybe the guy who's homophobic was was uh touched inappropriately by a man when he was a kid or or some or the woman who's homophobic was was uh sexually abused by a lesbian like you never hear of those kinds of things where the feels, the history, the trauma, the sadness, and therefore there's this dysfunction in the present, right? You never hear about that kind of stuff. No. No.

[22:02] But I'm afraid, for a variety of reasons, I'm going through a bitter hatred of humanity phase. So I also want to be clear about that. Cook, thank you for the tip. I appreciate that. You can tip on the apps here, or you can tip at slash donate. Nice and easy to do, slash donate. And I really do appreciate that. We're doing a lot of fantastic work up here.

[22:30] Acknowledgment of Support and Progress

[22:31] There are four, four, count them, four people on the FDR bandwagon working both in front of and behind the scenes to make your experience of free domain so much better. And it also makes it very important for the future. I mean, just the very fact that we now have multi-track transcriptions of the call-in shows is so important. And all of that is coming from your support. The fact that we have obviously the stuff, but AI, which continues to be refined. The fact that I have written, this is three books in four years, three years, four years. I wrote the present. I wrote the future. I'm just finishing up the audio book, reading a peaceful parenting. Uh, and all of that is very, very important. And, uh, I think does great things, great things for the show.

[23:29] So I really do appreciate your support I really, really do appreciate your support And thank you for it As I think Three, who's the new recruit? Well, I don't know if I could tell you The transcripts are cool, yeah And they're fantastic for searching, right? If you want to search particular issues, It took a lot of work to set that stuff up, man Let me tell you, so yes we uh have somebody new and whether that person new can stay or not uh depends on your um your support sorry math is math math is math and it's a tough economy out there man i think everybody knows that right it's a tough economy out there hundreds of premium shows more added from the archives the easy to use premium content manager yes yes of course right and you you know, the peaceful parenting book. I mean, that's been a bit, a real slog, man. That's been a real slog. And emotionally, it's really challenging. Uh, the part on pedophilia was brutal for me as I'm sure it will be, but absolutely essential.

[24:43] So yes, it's funny. So the men judge the efficiency of the worker. The women feel the trauma of the worker.

[24:59] Balancing Personal and Professional Perspectives

[24:59] And I understand both perspectives, but the problem is that you can't mix the two. You cannot mix the two. You can't take somebody in a professional context and say, but the feelings, the history, the sadness, the this, the that, and the other, any more than you can take somebody in a purely personal context and say, but the professionalism and the effect and the purpose and the efficacy and all of that, right? I mean, if a therapist is listening to a woman talk about how she was traumatized as a child and they figure out that's why she overeats, can the therapist say, you absolutely cannot be giving people health advice. It's like, but she's in therapy. That's not what she's all about, right? That's not what she's there for. On the other hand, if somebody's in a job where they're supposed to be giving health advice and they're morbidly obese, to say, but your feelings, your history, your trauma, and your sadness, that is inappropriate because it's the wrong context.

[26:28] So, the personal and the professional, right? I mean, this is one of the things that's happened, of course, with the sort of tone policing of the female-led pink ghetto HR department and its effect on the business world. It's become, like, personal. Well, this is offensive, this is upsetting. And, of course, in the business world, offensive and upsetting is kind of irrelevant. Is it productive? Now, there are times when being offensive and upsetting makes things less productive. But it's kind of like one of the things I enjoy about playing sports is, it's trash talking it's a lot of fun and trash talking if it's done right can help people play better it can rouse their competitive instincts it can have them be in a better humor about their own self-criticism and all of that.

[27:24] So So trash talking, it's like, oh, that's upsetting, that's offensive, this, that, and the other, right? But it's like, but does it make the players better? That's what matters.

[27:37] Productivity vs. Comfort

[27:38] Whereas if it's tone policing and, well, someone's upset, the only thing that matters is, are they upset? It doesn't matter if they took in a better performance or they perform better. It's sort of famous in the acting world that sometimes driving an actor to a place of emotional discomfort gets a fantastic performance out of it.

[28:13] Right? That's really important. And there are times when the actors will say, I hated what the director did at the time, but looking back upon it, man, it was really great. It really got something fantastic out of me. So the guy who directed Marlon Brando in The Last Tango in Paris, who was a Marxist, and the whole thing is a window into the Marxist mindset, set which is truly horrifying of course but the director said to marlon brando just use your personal life use your personal experience like people think marlon brando was this big method actor which is where you use your own personal emotional memories to recreate passions uh in the world uh in the world of the art world that you're working on and he said to marlon brando just use your own personal life, use your own personal views, right? Use your own personal history. And so some of the stories that Marlon Brando says about the guy with the clay pipe, they all come from his own personal life, his own personal history. Right?

[29:29] And Marlon Brando pulled off some incredible acting in that movie. And afterwards he said, I'm never, ever, ever doing that again. That was too appalling. That was too horrible. I'm never, ever, I'm going to just be a technical actor. I'm never, ever going to pull from my own personal experiences ever again, even though the acting in The Last Tango in Paris is shockingly powerful. Powerful.

[30:01] Pushing Boundaries for Performance

[30:01] So the director made Marlon Brando very uncomfortable and got one of the best performances he ever gave in one of the most appalling movies ever made. Thank you for the tip. I appreciate that. Shelley Duvall. Yeah. So listening to Shelley Duvall and the director of The Shining. Right. He was really, really pushing her hard and he got a great performance out of her. I was very uncomfortable going through a good chunk of the stuff and writing and researching and putting a good chunk of the stuff in regarding child abuse and peaceful parenting. Very, very important.

[30:50] Will the transcripts apply to new shows or all shows? No. No, I'm not going to do them all. I appreciate your work, especially the call-in shows. I use it to diagnose my own questions about my life and childhood. I appreciate that. Thank you. He pushed her way too hard, though. It seemed abusive. Yeah, I hear what you're saying. and he specifically withheld Stanley Kubrick, right? He specifically withheld comfort from her. Don't give her any comfort. She's just complaining. She's just whining. I don't know. I mean, it's a tough call. As an actor, if the director is... I had some very harsh directors in my time as an actor. And, you know, I resented it sometimes at the time, but looking back, I should have been as committed as they were to getting a great performance. Yeah, I saw the question about women and wrong. We'll get there, but I appreciate you bringing it up again.

[31:56] So if the director is really pushing the actress to get a better performance, the actress should be as committed. Now, was it Tippi Hendren or something when Alfred Hitchcock directed her in The Birds? He locked her up for a week or two with these crazy aggressive birds, and she was seriously traumatized. And yeah, that's really terrible. That's really abusive because she was physically injured and all of that. The emotional stuff, I mean, I had directors yelling at me and throwing chairs around and, you know, working to really get me to get a better performance. And, you know, it works. It works. It works. I had sometimes very aggressive bosses is that pushed me to do better. And I did better. So it's, you know, it's hard to say. It's hard to say.

[32:55] Embracing Discomfort for Improvement

[32:55] But if everyone's always supposed to be comfortable, nothing ever improves. All improvement comes with discomfort, right? Starting to exercise comes with discomfort. Eating less comes with discomfort. Philosophical self-knowledge comes with discomfort. Everything that is progress. You know, if somebody invents a water-powered car, everybody, based upon the internal combustion engine and supplying oil and gasoline, will go through significant discomfort. That's what some parents did for their kids to achieve success. Michael Jackson's father, yeah. That's a different matter with kids, of course, right? Because kids don't have a choice. But Shelley Duvall, she could have just gone on strike. Now, of course, I mean, I don't know, maybe Stanley Kubrick would have threatened her with suing her for breach of contract. Like there was this actress who was in a pretty appalling movie called Boxing Helena, which was about a guy who cuts off the arms and legs of some woman and she just signed up to do the movie and then she didn't do the movie. She got sued like crazy and it was pretty appalling stuff. But she didn't want to do the movie. She decided not to do the movie. She took her lumps and all of that. Yeah, hard conversations with family can be uncomfortable. Absolutely. Absolutely.

[34:17] Somebody says, I've got old school blue collar bosses that don't tolerate whining, excuses and laziness. I can totally get this. It's effective, and aside from the time he borderline assaulted me, I don't mind it that much. A lot of co-workers despise it.

[34:32] Gosh, what was the name? She was in nine and a half weeks, and also eight mile? Oh, gosh, what was her name? It's the moment that I get it Kim Bassinger Kim Bassinger Kim Bassinger oh, it was overturned interesting, I did not know that this just, wow it was overturned so she was sued for 8 million dollars and then it was overturned, what did she say why did she quit So when she first perused the script for Boxing Helena, Kim Basinger testified she felt it was the strangest piece she'd ever read. It was a story about a woman with no arms and no legs, a character who was basically just a head. When I read the piece, I just felt I had to meet the mind behind this idea. The decision led to meetings in early 1991 with the screenwriter-director Jennifer Lynch, daughter of Twin Peaks director David Lynch. All right. so what did they say that's right so they say Basinger verbally agreed to star in the film but when she pulled out before shooting began, mainline claims that Narsen nearly 6.4 million in potential domestic and foreign sales.

[36:02] Um so So, let's see here. Her attorney said Basinger was suffering from a cold and fever, and throughout her day-long testimony, she repeated, oh, blah, blah, blah. She said she liked the script when she first read it and authorized her entertainment attorney to try and get the role. But she said concerns surfaced when she passed the script around to 15 or 20 people I admire. And the overwhelming response was, this was a joke. She said her agent at the time wondered if the film was made, tomatoes would be thrown against the screen. She did not want to commit herself to the movie until she resolved with Jennifer Lynch such questions as nudity and who her co-stars would be.

[36:48] Balancing Artistic Vision and Sensitivity

[36:48] Uh, Helena's character needed to be made more sympathetic, but the Lynch quote had an argument for every single idea I'd come up with. She was very, very stern about her vision of Helena. And by June 1991, Lynch had made changes in the script. A passenger said of them, I told her they were laughable. I told her it was like bad television, the worst television writing in history. So Basinger emphatically denied that she gave Lynch or producer Carl Mazzucone, president of Mainline the impression she was going to take the movie or make the movie even though the Hollywood trade paper variety announced in March 1994 she was set to make the film, The actress said she regularly sees the trades print stories about actresses supposed to make certain movies and the movies never seem to get made, Yeah, But I guess it got overturned because the jury got, what, improper instructions? And then they ended up with an out-of-court settlement, right? And the film was a disaster, right? Didn't it completely flop? Julian Sands, like the guy I love from Room of the View, was pretty terrible. she got sued for 6.4 million over a film that barely made a million dollars.

[38:12] So yeah the verbal contracts and all of that is pretty tough, and she was a huge star at the time.

[38:27] Sorry I find this quite a surgeon becomes obsessed with the seductive woman he once was in an affair with. Refusing to accept that she has moved on, he amputates her limbs and holds her captive in his mansion. God, that's so repulsive. That's absolutely, repulsive. So yeah, she was uncomfortable about the nude scene. And why you would sign off without the final script is also bizarre to me. Like you sign on to do a movie and And then they changed the script so that it's something completely appalling or even more appalling. And then it was like, yeah. Yeah, she had to file for bankruptcy and all of that. And, you know, really, really harmful for your career, right? Because then you get the, and people get the impression that you're going to back out of movies and so on and all that stuff.

[39:29] Intriguing Movie Industry Insights

[39:30] It's fascinating. Anyway, I find that stuff very interesting. Kim Basinger. Yeah, thanks. All right. So yeah, you'll see this on social media where, you know, like if you remember the image that opened up Europe's borders many years ago was the Turkish boy who drowned on the beach. Why did he drown on the beach? Because his father apparently wanted to get to Canada for free dental care, and so he put his family on a massively overloaded boat in the Mediterranean, and then they sailed into a storm, or a storm hit them or whatever, and so the kid ended up drowned on the beach.

[40:17] And the man responded pretty consistently with, well, that parent was pretty bad in putting his kid on an overloaded boat and sailing where there was a storm or sailing into a storm or whether the storm hit them or whatever but without checking the weather or whatever it is right because the dads are saying look i can get in trouble for having my kid ride around on a bike without a helmet that the parent is responsible for putting that kid in harm's way, and that's really terrible and also because there's all this free stuff being handed out by countries other people are doing crazy stuff to try and get there so maybe we should stop the incentives like they just had a sort of rational analysis of this but all the women's you know ovaries twitched and it's like but the drowned child makes me sad and therefore we can't have borders i don't know it's um it's just a very different a very different mindset and again not all women not all men i get all of that right.

[41:21] The script defended her sensibilities yet she was married and had a kid with Alec Baldwin yeah well, What is that comedy article that Alec Baldwin is thoroughly tired of everyone around him diving for cover whenever he tries to pull out his cell phone? She was great in The Shining. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, she was. She was.

[41:58] All right. Let's get to this question. Good morning. This is my opinion. Perhaps you understand. Not all women, but a lot of women, in my opinion, have difficulty admitting when they are wrong. Is there a philosophical explanation for this? And how do you suggest dealing with women like this? Or should you just walk away? So, admitting when they are wrong. So, the question is, why? Let's say that this is a thing, and it seems to be a thing. So the question is then, well, why would women be unwilling to admit fault? A hint, it's not about men, right? It's not about men. You can't understand the world until you've talked to women about what happened with their female friends when they were young.

[43:04] I mean, there are women here. Tell me if I'm wrong. It's really kind of impossible to understand the world unless you have frank discussions with women about what happened with their female friends when they were young. And in particular, tweens to mid-teens. Somebody posted on X the other day. A woman said, yeah, when I was 12, myself, my female friends all got together and had a mock reality show ceremony with a rose where they voted me out of the friend group. It was so brutal that many years later, most of the participants contacted me as adults and apologized for their behavior. Female friendships are often brutal in a way that men have grave difficulty understanding. Thank you.

[44:05] Talk to women about what happened with their sisters when they were young. Talk to women about what happened with their friendships when they were young. And this is all the way from grade school onwards. So you can't understand women if you don't understand what happened in their social circle repeatedly over the course of their childhoods. You can't understand your wife. You can't understand your girlfriend. You can't understand your sister. You can't understand your female friends.

[44:34] Understanding Female Social Circles

[44:35] You can't understand your boss if she's a woman. You cannot. Like for men, we don't have these kinds of friendships. We have friendships where we disagree. We have friendships where we yell at each other. We have friendships where we trash talk each other.

[44:55] Taylor says, I still remember in elementary school, my best friend asked me with a note if I liked another girl. I said, no. She immediately showed it to her and they laughed at me. Right. Betrayal, betrayal, betrayal is the cinquantant of, it's the modus operandi of a lot of early female friendships. So you confide in your female friend. You're a girl, you confide in your female friend. And you give her great power because you give her gossip. And then a lot of times, not always, but a lot of times, a lot of times, the vulnerability and intimacy and secrets that you've shared with a female friend get shopped around like bullshit currency to lower your status and raise her status with the other girls. Because girls are in constant search of gossip and dirt. and if you're a woman and you're vulnerable and you're open to a friend, that friend is now in possession of great power over you and you know of course some of them handle that responsibly and keep their secrets but most of them don't, most of them don't.

[46:05] So if you want to understand why women have trust issues, it's not, I mean, yes, it's to do with the absent fathers. I get all of that. But if you want to look at why women have trust issues, they're wounded by other girls.

[46:23] Every girl I've ever talked to has the story of her best friend who utterly betrayed her in such a way that the emotions still run strong decades later. Every single one. Now, when I was writing my novel, The God of Atheists, I had to deal with female friendships among young girls. And so I remember going, a friend of mine who's an architect was working on a cottage and invited me up for the weekend. I did a little bit of work and he had also, the people who owned the cottage were up there and they had daughters. And so I said, look, I'm working on this book, you know, sit with me. I'm going to ask you your, your girls questions. And I did this a whole number of times, always with the parents present, of course, and just ask the girls about their friendships and what happened. And I learned all about this decades and decades and decades ago, because you ask the girls about their relationship with their female friends. And it's, it's primal, it's Amazonian, it's brutal. It's Darwinian.

[47:37] Somebody says I start oh it's James I started re-listening to the God of Atheists last night it's so so good yes it is, yes it is slash books it's free somebody says I have a female boss my colleague and her were best friends one day they had a fallout and the colleague quit the workplace yep yep yep yep yep, So, do you also want to know why women complain about men being emotionally unavailable? Right? Do you want to know why women complain about men being emotionally unavailable? Do you know why men are often emotionally unavailable to women? Because we know you're going to spill all that stuff. Yeah. Men fight with fists, shake hands and move on. women fight with words and remember forever. Yeah, a man might blacken your eye, but he won't destroy your entire reputation.

[48:44] I mean, you understand a lot of the woke stuff is just female nature plus political power, right? And which, I'm not saying that male nature plus political power is any better, but a lot of the woke stuff is just female power plus political, female nature plus political power. So, somebody says I have two female bosses and both are vindictive and try to outdo each other. Yeah. I mean, people say, you know, there's this meme of like the woman trying to figure out what lipstick to use, and her brain is entirely activated, and it's like, well, which, the quality of the man she's going to date, and the brain's completely empty. Because a lot of women are so fearful of other women, that they let the approval of their friends choose their boyfriend. And because the friends can often be vindictive and sabotaging.

[49:45] They won't guide their friend quote friend towards the best boyfriend kit says oh women compete against each other not against men he also said he also says i've made the mistake of being open about my feelings with women they used it as a weakness to exploit once burned twice shy well it's not all women right not all women canceling is a female phenomenon on it's reputational crucifixion yeah so for men it would be entirely humiliating and embarrassing, to cancel someone because they won a debate like that would be appalling it would be sort of like, if you lost a fight as a guy like a boy right you get into some fight some fist fight with some guy some other boy right you're both 12 or you you know you you give a few you you lose a few you You know, someone gets a bloody lip, somebody, whatever, gets a bruise. And then the kid, the boy who lost the fight, he then were to cut the brakes on the other guy's bike so that the kid plowed into a wall or something like that would be considered completely psycho. Yeah.

[50:57] And that boy would be ostracized. The boy who did that, who did some sort of suffer vengeance against winning, against losing, or, you know, I've said this before, but I remember there was a very smart Christian, when I was in my teens who gave me the mathematical improbability of life arising from a primordial soup. And he completely won that debate. Now, he and I both happened to work at Pizza Hut. I still remember his name, actually. A great guy. And he won that debate. I couldn't, and it was a public debate, like it wasn't some formal thing, but we were arguing in public, and he won the debate. He had the math, he had the data, he had the facts. I didn't. So he won the debate. Very interesting. And I appreciate it. I didn't obviously like losing the debate in public, but I really did appreciate the information. Now, the idea that because I lost, the debate, I would lie about this guy and try and get him fired from his job? Honestly, it would never have crossed my mind in a zillion years.

[52:12] I mean, as a guy, with this, you lost the debate, and so you're going to lie about someone and try and get them fired. Absolutely incomprehensible. It never would have crossed my mind in a zillion or more years.

[52:34] But that's the rigor these days, right? It would never cross my mind. In the same way that, you know, when you are the team captain, right? In a pickup game, baseball, I was team captain sometimes for the pickup game of baseball, and the kids all line up and you choose the kids, right? Now, the idea that you would choose a kid who's really bad in order to make him feel good is incomprehensible to me. But all that's been happening, of course, is this programming of bottomless sympathy for the underdog. Now, bottomless sympathy for the underdog, I completely understand from the female perspective. I completely understand it because if you are, and this has evolved all the way through our evolution, right? So a woman who gives birth, like she's got, I don't know, she's got five kids and one of them is smaller and weaker because sympathy for the underdog, so to speak. Well, you have to give more resources to the baby than to the seven-year-old, right?

[53:56] So for women, women are programmed to have massive bottom to sympathy for the underdog because that's how we stayed alive. Right. So if you've got five kids, right, every two years, right, you got five, five kids, right? Two to ten, right? You don't just lay out a bunch of food and say whoever gets the most food wins because the 10-year-old is going to snatch everything from the 2-year-old. So you have to set up this redistribution. You have to make sure that the 10-year-old doesn't get too much, that enough goes to the 2-year-old. So you have to, even if force is needed, you have to make sure that the underdog gets their, what they need, right?

[54:38] Yeah, it's like the book Death of a Salesman, Sympathy for the Dad. Yeah. So women's innate sympathy for the underdog is why we're all here it's it's nothing to argue against it's nothing that's bad it's just that what happens is women's sympathy for the underdog gets played by political predators who play the victim in order to rouse women's sympathy for the underdog, which is why victim culture has become so prevalent in the West, because, women experience emotional horror in the presence of a helpless underdog and are virtually compelled to give, usually, their husbands resources. It's a very, very deep instinct. It's very powerful, and it's a beautiful thing. You combine that with political power, that's a whole thing. It's different. Because then, competent adults find that by playing the endless, helpless, bottomless victim, women will use the power of the state to transfer, usually, male resources to the, quote, victims, and the victim becomes the predator, right?

[56:08] It's like a predator that plays dead in order to get the prey to approach them. And again, there's nothing wrong with female nature, but female nature evolved without central currency, without government currency. Female nature arose in an interpersonal context. text. It did not arise with fiat currency, central banking, massive intergenerational debt, and so on, right? Everything that is healthy in the human condition becomes tumoresque in the presence of political power.

[56:59] The predator analogy is a good one, yeah. Are beta-symp men trying to tap into female sympathy? So the beta-symp men, they're two different things, right? The symp man who gives resources to women is usually giving resources to women enough that he can sustain a credible masturbation fantasy about her, right? So he'll give her money, maybe he's turned on by being exploited, and then he just gives her enough resources so that he can credibly believe in his own mind that masturbation is something that, that there's a possibility of some kind of sexual encounter. So he's just paying enough to make his masturbation fantasies credible. The beta, so the beta is saying, men are terrible, I sympathize. Men are bad, I sympathize. And he's saying, I'm perfectly willing to be the 10th place prize winner. Hasn't the faking of infancy been around for thousands of years? How has this not been selected out by now? Oh, is Fiat so new this has not happened yet. Yeah, yeah, for sure. Yeah, for sure. I mean, yeah, absolutely. So, so.

[58:27] Pressures on Women to Provide Resources

[58:28] But when women are faced, like, let's look at women in a marital relationship in a free society, right? So women in a marital relationship in a free society, they're making their own money or, you know, if they're staying home with their kids, their husband is making the money. and then someone down the road, some adult, pretends to be a victim, right? He pretends to be a victim. He's just so sad and he's obese or addicted to something and he can't hold down a job or doesn't hold down a job and he just starts crying and bleating for all the female sympathy, right? Well, the female sympathy is attached to her own children and she's restrained by her husband's practicality, right?

[59:17] Her maternal instincts are attached to her own children and therefore there's not this big open empty socket for some victim to plug into to get resources and she's restrained by both her and her husband's practicality. So if the woman says, honey, give me $5,000 so I can give it to the addict down the street, street her husband's going to say you know that's really not a good idea and and here's why and you know it's going to be taking money from our kids and also he's probably going to take the money and he's going to spend it on drugs which is going to increase the criminal element or the dysfunctional element and so on i'll tell you what i'll do though i care about this guy i'll go down and i'll i'll offer him a job now the husband probably doesn't imagine that the addict actually he wants a job.

[1:00:07] Right? But he'll go and offer the guy a job. Now, if the guy takes a job, problem solved. If the guy doesn't take a job, then charity isn't going to help, right? And this is why men and women work better together. Right? Men don't have the requisite sympathy for the underdog that keeps the youngest children healthy, and women have excess sympathy for manipulation by pretend losers out there in the real world. What you're talking about is reminding me of Just Poor. Absolutely. It's one of the central themes of Just Poor, is manipulation of the strong by the pretend weakness. Uh, Taylor says, this is a woman, she said, this happened to me. My brother's car broke down and I wanted to give him mine for free, but my husband made me sell it to him. Right. Well, he didn't make you, right? He made the case, right? He made the case. In general, women, I've, I've had this in my life. In general, women want to provide resources to those they perceive of as victims. Yes.

[1:01:27] And men say, fine, but standards, right? Okay, but standards, right? Okay, so your aunt has this whatever medical bill, okay. But first of all, it'd be nice if she paid it back at some point, but even if she doesn't, let's say that your aunt has some issue, with her health, but she's also severely overweight. Say, okay, let's help her out, but she's got to lose weight. Right. Your brother-in-law is broke. It's like, okay, we'll help him out, but he's got to get a job. One time. One time. And for women, it kind of goes on and on. Right. And again, remember, women would be designed to have children on a continual basis from 18 to 42. to. And so women would always, always, always be looking out for the underdog because they would raise their kids. And then by the time their youngest kids were out of diapers, their eldest kids were already delivering new kids and they'd be grandmothers. So there'd always be the underdog to take care of. And thank goodness that women did take care of the underdogs, right?

[1:02:49] Women are constantly pressured to take care of others.

[1:02:58] Is that your perspective? I mean, you know that men are net contributors to the welfare system, right? And women are net receivers. Men are constantly pressured to take care of others all the time. My God. I mean, literally, women and children first in the lifeboats, right? Take care of others while men are drafted to go fight these stupid wars that only always seem to bring debt and more war. Men are constantly pressured to take care of others. Go to work, pay your bills, take care of your family, women and children first, pay into the welfare state for all of the underdogs and the welfare state of the single mother state. My God. At least with women, it's just pressure. or with men is the force of law. How many women are paying alimony? My God, how many women go to jail for failure to pay alimony or child support?

[1:03:57] Ugh. I don't know. How about women try looking at it from the male perspective from time to time? Sorry, I don't mean to sound overly frustrated, but women are constantly pressured to take care of others, and men aren't. We go to jail if we don't pay into the welfare state that takes care of untold numbers of voluntarily chosen single mothers. Jeez. Women aren't drafted throughout out history, but apparently women are constantly pressured to take care of others. My gosh. She says, damn it. So I was biologically programmed to sympathize with the underdog. Yes. So what's wrong with biological programming? I mean, I remember the day pretty much clearly the day when I woke up from girls being kind of annoying creatures who got in the way when when you wanted to play good sports to like girls, girls, girls, right? I mean, that's, that's biology. That's just hormones turning on to make you drive for, you know, founding a family and what's nothing wrong with that. It's a beautiful part of life. Biological programming without biological programming, we would all starve to death. Got to feel hungry and eat food that you want to eat, right?

[1:05:16] So another reason why the powers that be want to keep women single, and childless is that if a woman is childless, her maternal instincts can be easily programmed to others, right, to others. And then because of that, women pressure for redistributionist schemes often paid for by men that the elites can use to bribe other people to stay in power, right?

[1:05:45] Okay, just remember, if you could tip, I would really, really appreciate that. So is it female nature that most can't seem to be able to admit they were wrong in anything during covid mask six feet lockdowns job wet market origin did they get one thing right, well yeah very few people are able to admit any any honesty or facts around around that stuff right, So, a woman who won't admit that she's wrong is absolutely a red flag. I mean, there are no women in my life who can't admit that they're wrong.

[1:06:30] Naturally, and usually, Steph made a good point about men taking care of others. They sure do. Well, but men are forced at gunpoint to take care of others, right? We have to pay into the taxes. We have to go to war if that's what comes up. And we have the only debtors prison that remains is generally for men who fail to pay child support, which may have happened because they lost their job or whatever right, which had pretty significant effects right women who've met men who face jail for failure to pay child support when it was jabber job they had to get jabbed which you know so it's not really taking care of others if you're forced to. But women feel pressure. Men have coercion, right? Okay, so how does female friendships being vile lead to women being unable to admit to men they were wrong? That's a fine question. Men can go for years without a single thanks. Yes, that's right. Most men do. Most men do. But punishment for failure to provide. So, what is the one prerequisite to being comfortable admitting you're wrong? What is the central prerequisite to being able to admit you're wrong?

[1:07:57] And it's a big question. Or to put it another way, why do people fear admitting fault? Why are people so unwilling to admit fault? Pridefulness. Nope. No. Yeah. Being sure it won't be used against them in the future. Yeah. So you won't want to admit fault if you admitting fault means that you will, have it used against you forever. Right? So if you admit fault in a relationship and the other person doesn't, that other person will continue to use you admitting fault to castrate you in the relationship, right? So if you're certain about something, it turns out you were wrong. And if you're in a dysfunctional quote relationship, if you're certain about something and later admit that you were wrong, what happens the next time you're certain about something? Oh, you're certain about this, just like you were certain about that. Well, maybe you shouldn't be so quick to be certain. Yeah. So.

[1:09:24] The reason why people don't want to admit fault is they've been in abusive relationships where admitting fault gets you punished forever and you can't ever escape. Okay, so you've been in relationships with other people who don't admit fault. And if you do admit fault, they'll use it against you forever. Oh, come on. Everybody's been in one of those. I certainly have more than one. Everybody's been in one of those, right? The other person demands that you admit fault. They'd never admit fault themselves. And when you do admit fault, they use it against you forever. Right? Come on. We've all been in one of those. And maybe it was voluntary, maybe it was involuntary. Effing hate that. Yeah, yeah, I get it. Someone bringing up your past errors stings real bad. I can't stand it. Yeah, for sure. So the best way that you abuse people that way is you tell them that admitting fault is a virtue, and then when they admit fault, you use it against them forever, and you never admit fault yourself. It's a standard semi-sociopathic manipulation technique, right? I don't need to go into that in more detail, right? I think we all understand that one pretty well, right?

[1:10:53] Lack of Trust and Betrayal in Female Relationships

[1:10:53] So, not being able to admit fault indicates, or is founded on, a lack of trust. A lack of trust. So, why do women grow up being so short of trust? Because they grow up with often betraying, manipulative, punitive, destructive, semi-sociopathic female relationships where all virtues are used against you, all honesty becomes a tradable secret for status, and betrayal is the order of the day. Emotional torture is the foundation of a lot of this nonsense, now of course the other question then becomes why is it that female friendships are this way.

[1:12:02] And maybe i have some theories or ideas of course as you can imagine but i'm certainly happy for the ladies to tell me why do you think female friendships are this way, now for men not being able to apologize gets you killed, right I mean you think of dual culture dueling culture right you insult another man you're going to get your eyes shut out the next morning, right.

[1:12:46] You insult another man, he's going to physically attack you and maybe kill you. So you really do have to watch your tongue around other men. And also, if you... Apologizing is a form of course correction, right? Now, men, we have to course correct. So when I first came to Canada, I didn't know how to play baseball. I thought it was like the British game rounders. And the British game rounders, you can choose, like you hit the ball, you can choose whether you run or not, you can take the next hit if you want. And that's not how it works in baseball in North America, right? Yeah, polite society comes out of you get killed if you're rude. I'm not saying that's right, I'm just saying that's the way it evolved. So.

[1:13:46] If I had not course corrected to play North American baseball with the proper rules, nobody would have wanted to play with me. If I'd have said, well, I'm going to play what you call baseball, but I'm going to apply the rules of rounders from England, then I would have struck out every time or most times. Because in rounders, you get three hits. And basically, if you think you can hit the ball better next time, you'll wait. And so I was just like, no, no, no, I'll take the next one because I thought it was rounders and everyone, all the kids at school were screaming at me the first time I played. Run, you limey bugger. And they were right. So if I had not course corrected, I would have had no one to play with.

[1:14:27] Right? American football is very different from British rugby. I grew up playing British rugby. If I had tried to take the rules of British rugby and apply them to American football, I never would have played any football. At least tennis was the same. So if I had not course corrected, I would have no one to play with. If you don't course correct, nobody wants to have you in their army. Nobody wants to have you in their hunting party. Nobody wants to have you do anything with them. So men have to course correct, which is baked into apologies, right?

[1:15:23] Now, somebody says, I get confused by how women say they want a traditional man who will pay for everything, then they demand feminist equality and get angry at any expectation of traditional gender roles. Well, that's just Schrodinger's feminist, right? Right? So, and I'm not saying this is true for all women, but you know, the less direct and honest and moral women, they want what is advantageous to them in the moment. Right? So, they want a traditional man who pays for anything because that's materially advantageous to them in the moment because they don't have to spend their own money. But then, if a man wants them to do more traditional female labor, then they don't want to do that because that's work for them. So, you understand, right? And men are like this too, men are like this too. It's just a sleazy, amoral resource maximization strategy. So how do men get mates? By displaying competence. Now for a man to sabotage another man shows a lack of competence and a lack of confidence. Does it make sense? So for a man to sabotage another man shows a lack of confidence and a lack of competence and is unattractive to women.

[1:16:44] So if a man has a fist fight with another man, and it turns out that he drugs the other man and then beats the hell out of him, women do not find that attractive. Because that's not an even playing competence-based market or sexual market. So he's cheated. A man who cheats, who sabotages another man, is not admirable to women. Because they want to know who the real victor is in a fair competition, right? So the man who cheats is considered less attracted by women.

[1:17:27] Because he's untrustworthy. And a woman has to trust a man a lot to give him children. I mean, evolutionarily speaking, I'm not talking sort of now, but a woman has to really trust a man and a man who cheats is not someone you want to have kids with, right? So excellence and victory is foundational to male sexual market value. For women, however, it's a different matter. Yes, they do want to make themselves more attractive, but they also want to make other women less attractive. And it's not considered sabotage for a woman to work to make another woman less attractive in the same way that it is considered sabotage for a man to cripple another man's competition abilities. Tell me if this makes sense. I don't want to linger too much on the obvious, but I also don't want to move on if something's unclear. Just hit me with a why if this makes sense so far.

[1:18:36] I'm just waiting for the stream to catch up. Yes, makes sense. Okay. So, for women to betray other women lowers those women's confidence. A less confident woman is less attractive to a man. So, if a woman betrays another woman, it makes her jumpy and insecure, thus making her less appealing to men, but not in a way that men understand. A man who sabotages another man is pretty open and it's pretty physical. But a woman who undermines the confidence of another woman, men don't particularly see it, and they look at the undermined woman and they say, she's just kind of nervous and insecure, secure and the highest status males want to go for confident and secure women because the man is going to be judged by the woman he's with and if a sort of strong alpha male ends up with a nervous amanda wingfield or i guess a laura wingfield type of introvert he's going to be judged negatively it's going to lower his status so the man wants a confident secure woman.

[1:20:05] Because she's going to be direct with him and he's not going to have to spend his precious, resources propping her up and talking her out of the crazy insecurity tree and constantly trying to heal problems she's having with other women he can actually focus his energies on providing resources to his family rather than just propping up his endlessly neurotic wife right Right. So making other women less attractive is unfortunately foundationally.

[1:20:40] Advantageous to women, which is why older women who are in competition for high status men with young women will tell young women to do things that make them less attractive. They will tell young women, you don't need no man, you don't let him push you over on anything, you know, fight for what's yours to make them argumentative and difficult, so that the men don't want them. Or they'll tell them to cut their hair short, or to get piercings, or tattoos, or don't wear makeup. That's a sign of the patriarchy. They'll just work to sabotage the attractiveness of the younger women. They'll tell the younger women to sleep around, and then don't hide your past, be confident about it, so that some guy who's high status in the moment says, yeah, I've got 50 bodies behind me like I'm an Aztec graveyard, and the man's like, ooh, thank you, but no, that's a lot of sausage to step over.

[1:21:36] Now, society advances when women focus on making themselves better. Society decays when women focus on making other women worse. Yeah, don't court the male gaze. What does that mean? Don't be attractive to men. Right? Don't trust a man. A man can betray you at any given time. Okay, so fuck with their ability to pair bond, so that you can compete. Now, of course, there are a lot of women who are still married, who are older, who aren't necessarily in the marketplace, but they themselves have made so many bad decisions that they feel the need to replicate their bad decisions on others, right?

[1:22:16] Yeah, reduce their breast size even if they weren't that big. Don't walk out too much. Men like a thick, big booty, whatever, whatever, right? And, you know, just all of this garbage, right? It's just a reproductive strategy called sabotage your competition, which men can't do because men work together as a team women work individually to get men, so a man can't sabotage another man in a team because if you think of a hunting party one man sabotages another man so the other man is about to throw the spear at the deer and one man goes goes, right? And the deer gets startled and runs away, right? Okay, so everyone goes hungry. So sabotaging another man when you're part of a team doesn't work. But for women, they're not in a team to get a high value man. It's individual competition, right?

[1:23:18] Individual Competition in the Sexual Market

[1:23:19] In individual competition, sabotage of the other is a perfectly valid strategy.

[1:23:30] Yeah, a dude like that would end up dead pretty soon. Absolutely, yeah. Yeah, there'd be a hunting accident, right? For sure. In a sports team, you can't sabotage your teammate because then everybody loses. So for men, sexual market value is a team sport. For women, sexual market value is an individual sport. Therefore, for women, sabotage is a perfectly valid reproductive strategy over the course of our evolution. Which is why women are catty and gossipy and work on destroying reputations and betray trust and give terrible advice to other women, right? You see this constantly. And if it's in-group, out-group, it's even bigger, right? So one of the ways that you conquer a group not your own is you push propaganda into that group that destroys pair bonding and reproductive rates, right? We can see this happening all over the place, isn't it? Fifth Generation Warfare 101, right?

[1:24:30] Influence and Propaganda in Social Dynamics

[1:24:31] Now, come on. Got a lot of people watching, a lot of people listening. Donations are very low today. Please try to help me with my motivation. That'd be very helpful. Somebody says, hair plugs and plastic surgery is a cheat and lots of money counters. Poor character. Good job, modern women. I'm not sure what that means. Sorry.

[1:24:58] No, it's not awful. No, no, no, no. No, it's not awful. No, see, that's a woman thing, right? It's not awful. I'm just talking about reproductive strategies.

[1:25:09] Reproductive Strategies

[1:25:09] I mean, a cuckoo lays her eggs in another bird's nest. Is that awful? No, it's just a reproductive strategy. The trap spider hides under the sand like it's not even there. Is that cheating? Right? The tiger creeps up until it's close, just the right spot, not too far that the gazelle can run away, not too close that the gazelle can see or smell the lion or the tiger, right? Is that cheating? No, that's just, I mean, we're all here because of male and female reproductive strategies. There's nothing wrong with these reproductive strategies at all, at all.

[1:25:53] At all. You know, in the book and movie Room with a View, the elder aunt is sabotaging the younger woman because the elder aunt gave up on love and missed her opportunity to get married. And then later on, there's a beautiful turnaround where the aunt then helps, the younger woman get happily married. I mean it's about as realistic as Lord of the Rings in terms of psychology but it's a beautiful thing to see, so is it terrible is it no it's just it's how we got here, it's how we got here.

[1:26:47] Now why there's another reason why it works, there's another reason it works. So a man wants to know that the woman will be loyal to him, not to other women. Because if the woman is loyal to other women, then the man has a massive vulnerability in his marriage. Does this make sense? Because Because the other women will be a wedge that can drive them apart. And then he ends up having to please the other women so they don't turn his wife against him. So a man wants a woman who's loyal to him, not just to other women.

[1:27:49] So, if a woman is utterly broken by other women being mean to her, it means that she does not have the ability to pair bond with the man. Right so the story should be and maybe i'll write it the story should be a girl with catty friends loser friends pull down sabotagey friends finds a great man loves him and basically says kiss off to her crappy female sabotage coven right.

[1:28:33] So a woman whose personality has been broken by female betrayal is too susceptible, right? Is too susceptible to female manipulation and therefore cannot be trusted by the man. Right? And I mean, this is the mean girls thing, right? The mean girls. Is that the love of a good man is the antidote to female betrayal. Trail. And so it is a sorting and filtering mechanism. The man needs to know that the woman is confident enough in her own value that her trashy friends can't wreck her personality. Does this make sense? Oh, thank you. I appreciate that. Thank you for the donation.

[1:29:28] And haven't you heard of this as a whole where a guy gets tired of the woman complaining about her female friends the boyfriend just like for god's sakes they're just terrible, stop complaining about them and either let them bother you less or find better friends, do you see what i'm saying i've i mean haven't we all had this impulse as men at one time or another, where some woman is like and you know what else she did and then she did this and then she said that and she's all this and i'm all that and it's like oh my god what are you doing if she's a bad person stop being her friend it's not that simple so you'd rather be miserable with your trash female friends than happy with a man who loves you, the man won't love you. No, you can have your friends. Have your friends. It also happens with women in their workplace drama. Yeah. Yeah. How about you come home and have some kids, right? I don't think anyone's tipped over on the rumble side at all. Oh, wait, one person. Thank you. All right.

[1:30:46] You know, it only matters that you can pair bond with your partner. The only thing that matters. Everything else is sabotage. You understand? Everything else is sabotage. Everything else is sabotage. It only matters that you can pair bond with your partner, with the father of your children, the mother of your children. That's all that matters. Everything else is sabotage. Anybody who comes between you and your pair bond is utterly, completely, and totally expendable because that's what a pair bond is. A pair bond is, based on virtue, nothing above loyalty. Based upon virtue, nothing above loyalty.

[1:31:41] Wow, this topic of admitting fault is truly eye-opening to me. This is very insightful. Thank you, Stefan. I feel like bringing this up at work and with friends. Yeah, bring it up, I think, with questions rather than conclusions. But yeah, I'm glad you're finding it helpful. That's why I enjoy these conversations so much. As we get to really lay down some serious base tracks of wisdom for the future. You know, like I said, I've said this before, I had a very close family member, who said to me when I was engaged, ah, I don't, I don't really want to get to know your fiance that much because you're just going to get divorced anyway. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Like, it's not even, it wasn't even a hesitation. I'm not having anyone around who thinks I'm gonna get divorced because confirmation bias is gonna cause them to sabotage.

[1:32:59] Yep, anybody who thinks you're going to fail is going to do their best to make sure that happens. They won't want to be wrong. They'll sabotage you. My ex had single co-workers and friends, and looking back, they did try to sabotage our relationship, implanting ideas of betrayal, and he's not answering his phone. He's cheating, et cetera. Yeah. There's a tipping point in life, my friends. Thank you, Chris. There's a tipping point in life. Oh, I wish I'd known this when I was your age, my friends. Oh, here's some hoary, bitter wisdom from the summit of acidic, hard-won knowledge. There's a tipping point in life. I will give you some serious wisdom here, my friends. There's a tipping point in life. And let me tell you what that tipping point is.

[1:34:04] They're not people with potential. They're just losers.

[1:34:15] You have someone you know when you're young. They're very smart, very thoughtful, very insightful, talented. And you want to encourage them. You want to help them. Because they have such potential. and maybe you have potential and people didn't invest in you so maybe you're acting out the kind of encouragement that you wanted from others or something like that right, and you encourage and you help and you encourage and you help and maybe they achieve a little of them but it just stalls and nope at some but there's a tipping point point. They're not people with potential. Maybe they were at some point. They're not people with potential. They're just losers. And losers replicate. If you can't make people the winners, they're active in making you a loser. That's confirmation bias. If they're not able to be encouraged to success, they will discourage you to failure, usually by ignoring everything that you're achieving.

[1:35:39] Oh, it wasn't hoary, bitter wisdom, H-W-H-O-R-Y, H-O-A-R-Y, which means kind of ragged. They're only pretending to have potential to destroy your potential. They're attempting to divert your potential, into propping up their lives. And this is how potential is destroyed horizontally. Oh no, nothing to apologize for. It's a homonym. I totally understand where you're coming from. It's not like it's typed out.

[1:36:27] You know, like when I would, I was right. I just wrote books. I just wrote books. I just sat down and went through the grueling, difficult, exciting, horrifying, challenging process of writing books. Oh, I've always wanted to write a book. Oh, um, write something down. I'll give you some feedback. Let's work on a table of contents, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. It's like, no, all that was happening was I wasn't writing books. I was just trying to help people write books, which was retarded. it. It's just nature's way of making sure that books don't get written, is to have losers tell you they want to write books.

[1:37:04] Right?

[1:37:07] Room with a View

[1:37:07] I have family members like this, always bring the story back to themselves, never give an inch to someone else's success. Yeah. Oh, Or you bring your success and your happiness and your enthusiasm to people and they just kind of stare at you like, oh, well, whatever, you know. They're just trying to piss on your fire, man. Urinate on your blaze. Take a shit on your painting.

[1:37:34] That's a tipping point. Hey, I'm nothing wrong. Somebody's enthusiastic. They want to do something. Yeah, give them a bit of support. I'm fine with that. Even now, after having wasted, it. I can't even tell you how much time, effort, energy, life, and money I'm trying to help people get ahead. Oh, brutal. I'm still fine. If somebody tells me, hey, I want to start a podcast, what should I do? Hey, I'm interested in crypto. Hey, man, I'll give them a bit of time. I'm not done that. I'm not done that. I don't want the exploitation of losers, which fundamentally mentally with self-exploitation. I don't want the exploitation of losers to cripple me from enthusiasm for coaching. But they better bring something fucking tangible back to the table before I put one more minute into it.

[1:38:41] It is very dangerous to be around counter-motivators or sabotagers. My three-year-old just saved our house. A grease fire started under boiling water, and she told my wife about it, and she put it out with a fire extinguisher. Wow. I found people who ask questions like that are procrastinating. No. No, they're sabotaging. people who ask you for resources without actually achieving anything are just there to waste your resources and cripple your potential, come on we all know people like this if you have any kind of extended family there's always someone like this there's always someone like this right, they destroy family wealth by demanding handouts and never improving.

[1:39:44] See, this is another difference between men and women. Men know that you need negative examples in order to police society. Women can't stand negative examples because they take it personally. So a guy who's a drunk is like, yeah, you know what? He's going to have to lose his house. He's going to have to learn. He's going to have to learn. Whereas the women are like but he's sad and he had a bad childhood and this and again i appreciate women's sympathy i appreciate men's strictness you both, you need both in the world to be good you need sympathy and you need strictness, men without women are too strict women without men are pathologically altruistic, or women with access to men's resources through the power of the state, men are incredibly frustrated in the world because women won't let negative examples help people do better.

[1:40:54] I mean, when I was a kid, those couple of kids in the class who were too old for the class because they'd been held back really helped me make sure I wanted to learn and pass the useless, trivial crap they were feeding me. Whereas the women are like, like but those kids they're trying their best they're sad they're their parents are unhappy it's really going to harm them and right we can't fail anyone.

[1:41:22] Right like there's this i think it's a video from some old 80s show where, the kid has got a fork near the electrical socket and the mom's like don't do that and the dad's It's like, hold up, you really want to do that? You really want to do that? You shouldn't, but you really want to? Okay, go ahead. Well, you're not going to be doing that again now, are you? Do you learn from falling, or do you learn from not falling? Do you learn from failing, or do you learn from never being allowed to fail? We've got this whole experiment going on, right? For men, it's like, well, we have to separate the winners from the losers. And the women are all like, but no one's a loser if you know them well enough. If you knew everything that happened to them and everything that occurred to them and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, right?

[1:42:34] You know, if somebody doesn't work, is broke, gets sick, can't pay their bills, that's bad. You know, like it's funny to me all these people crying, oh, groceries are so expensive and I'm living paycheck to paycheck. It's like, I bet you if you looked around their house, you'd find so much useless shit that it's ridiculous. I mean, everybody knows you need to save some money for a rainy day. Winter is coming. The economy is not great. Debt is there. And you look at people who are like, I can't afford groceries. It's like, well, what did you do with your stimmy checks over COVID? I bet you bought some pretty cool shit with them, didn't you? If you'd have taken your stimmy checks and put it into Bitcoin, You'd be fine. You'd be wealthy. But no. Bought a stereo and went on vacation and upgraded your tablet and, okay, great. So people who are like, it's really bad that groceries are so expensive. It's like, yeah, you're supposed to save money.

[1:44:01] Or, here's a thought, maybe, just maybe, you shouldn't vote for political parties that promise to spend money on everything. You know if you vote for political parties that promise you the earth moon and sun for free, don't be surprised when your money loses value that's not complicated where's the money come from coming from and all these are all the same people i've been talking to for 40 years about the national debt and they haven't given a shit but now that the price of ham has gone up 30 they're like oh my god it's the end of the world right i can't just i can't i can't get there i I can't get there. But she's, you know, she's really sad. It's like, yeah, I get that. And that's why we shouldn't do this stupid stuff, right? That's why you've got to save your money. I mean, I've been a huge saver the moment I started getting an extra penny in my life. I've never been a frivolous spender. I've always been a huge saver.

[1:44:57] I hang on to money until time and circumstances pry it loose with a crowbar and a puff of dust, Hallmark ran out of flat screen TVs after the stimmy checks yeah okay so you know you got a TV, you didn't save that money you didn't invest that money you didn't do anything wise with that money you bought a TV I mean, I like TVs. Nothing wrong with a TV. Enjoy your TV.

[1:45:32] But people who've said, you know, well, I, I binged watch this eight season show over the last two months. I just binged watched every single one of these episodes of these, this eight season brain rotting propaganda laced show. Right. Okay. Great. Great. Did you watch even one documentary on politics or economics? Did you learn anything about what you're voting about? Anything. It takes maybe two or three hours to go through Henry Hazlitt's economics in one lesson. That's all. So you got 14,000 hours to binge watch some propaganda slop with titillating bullshit in it, but But you can't read economics in one lesson. Okay, well then, why would I care what you have to say about inflation?

[1:46:38] Of course, you know, if you could talk to these people, you'd say, oh, why do you think the inflation is happening? Corporate greed. Okay, why do you think that? Well, the prices are raised. Well, do you think corporations want to raise prices? Don't you think corporations want to lower prices? I mean, do you think that, say, computer manufacturers or cell phones who are giving you way more technology for less money now than they did in the past, why do you think they want to lower prices? Have you ever run a corporation? Have you ever been responsible for a balance sheet? So you haven't thought about any of these things. But the price is up. It's like, well, yes. And you're a key reason why. Because you believe things that are false and you vote for liars who promise you something for nothing. When I was raised, I mean, if something sounds too good to be true, it probably is. This is how I was raised. If some pretty politician offers you something for nothing, it's going to come at some expense. You saw the first episode of Fallout yesterday, pretty disgusting stuff. Oh, it's vile. Absolutely vile. Absolutely vile. It's a genuinely repulsive show.

[1:48:03] Uh no beauty no virtue no truth no honor no decency no morality, yeah it's um absolutely repulsive and this is what they have all the money in the world for right, this is what they have all the money in the world for i i look at the frame of that show show. And I think that my entire novel called The Present could have been made into a movie for just one of those episodes, but there's absolutely no way that my novel will ever get made into a movie, at least in the current historical cycle, because it would be too triggering to people. Somebody says, I had to sit my wife down and explain to her in thorough detail how treacherous it is to talk to friends about me in a complaining way. It took a while to even convince her, but now she gets it and agrees.

[1:49:15] Steph, why do you think the FTC banned non-compete clauses? Do you think it is because the deep state knows the economy will get really bad? Yeah, so, I mean, I assume it's to compensate to some degree for DEI, but yeah, non-compete clauses are regularly abused, like non-dismaragement clauses, to prevent whistleblowing or any information coming out about negative aspects of a corporation. I honestly don't know why. I don't know why. I mean, it could just be as personal as someone in the FTC got burned by a non-compete clause and is angry about it. I mean, not everything is a big conspiracy. It could be that. Now, somebody did say, I don't want to address this.

[1:50:00] Somebody said, I'm in a rough spot in my marriage where we've hurt each other deeply and I've been daydreaming about access to a crippling degree. It's not a realistic option because we have kids. bids. I've heard you say, work like hell to improve your situation, and I will.

[1:50:14] Renewing Closeness and Vulnerability

[1:50:14] Any other advice to renew closeness and vulnerability? Broad question, I know. So, the man is asking me to save his marriage. Maybe this sounds ungrateful, perfectly happy to accept that criticism. I don't care. I'm just going to say it anyway. The man is asking me to save his marriage. And he gave me just about the lowest tip of the live stream, i've got to tell you i'm not sure what to make of that i'm not profoundly offended, i'm just not sure what to make of that i find it completely baffling to me, and i'm not trying to be mean or anything like that i genuinely don't understand, this. And I'm happy to have it explained to me. You can't be broke. He's got a wife and kids.

[1:51:14] So, you know, if you got, y'all can help me understand it and maybe the person can help me understand it as well. I'm genuinely baffled and in deep humility, I ask for your wisdom. Please save my marriage. Steph, here's five bucks.

[1:51:36] Somebody says, I've been listening to you for over half my life now. You continue to provide so many valuable insights. Thank you so much. I appreciate that. Thank you. And listen, I'm not going to crap at someone over a $5 tip. I have other people have tipped five bucks. No problem with that. But somebody who says, Steph, I've got a wife and kids. My marriage is falling apart. I desperately need your help to save my marriage. Here's five bucks.

[1:52:07] Again, I could be completely wrong about this. I could be absolutely, totally, and completely wrong about this. I just want to be frank and honest with you guys about my thought process. I'm just trying to understand it. If he thinks I can save his marriage, is saving his marriage worth only five bucks? If I don't point that out, am I being dishonest? I genuinely baffled. Is saving your marriage only worth five bucks to you? But if saving your marriage is only worth five bucks to you, then your marriage isn't worth anything. Your marriage is worth a latte. So if you don't think your marriage is worth much, why would I invest a lot of time, effort, and energy into saving your marriage? And again, I'm perfectly happy to be corrected on all of this, and maybe I'm being a selfish, ungrateful, whatever, right? But I'm just being honest about my thoughts.

[1:53:10] Value of Marriage: $5

[1:53:11] I don't know what to make about that. I don't know what to make of that. Does he not think his marriage is worth more than five bucks? If he doesn't think his marriage is worth more than five bucks...

[1:53:29] Then why would I care about his marriage? Now, he could say, Steph, I'm down to my last five bucks. I'm really sorry it's so low. Please don't take this as an indication of how little I value my marriage, but I'm desperate for your advice. Totally fair. I wouldn't crap about that at all. It's just, I can't help but see the, and if he hadn't donated anything, and if he said, listen, I'm really in a rough spot in my marriage, if he hadn't donated anything, I wouldn't crap about that either. I haven't crapped about, I mean, most people here haven't donated. And yet I'm answering questions with happiness and energy, right? So if he hadn't donated anything, that would be fine too. If he asked the same as in a call-in request, does the payment donation evaluation change? I thought call-ins were free for a reason. What is that reason? I'm not charging for call-ins. If he had sent me this as a call-in, I'd have been fine to schedule two or three hours to talk to the guy. That's the part I don't understand. I'm in a rough spot in my marriage where we've hurt each other deeply and I've been daydreaming about exes to a crippling degree. It's not a realistic option because we have kids. I've heard you say work like hell to improve your situation and I will. Any other advice to renew closeness and vulnerability? Broad question I know. Save my marriage. Save my children.

[1:54:56] So it's not about, if he did, you know, I don't charge for call-in shows. Never have, never will. So it's not a matter of the question. It's the matter of, I'm assigning a monetary value to the saving of my marriage, and that monetary value is $5. He's multiplying the value of a saved marriage by the probability that your advice saves it. He doesn't think you can save it. Okay, so I agree with you. That's a fantastic observation, Cameron. I really, really appreciate that. I agree with you. So if he says the odds of you saving my marriage are so low that for me getting a half hour of advice from you is only worth five bucks, then he's saying the marriage can't be saved. In which case, why would I invest the time and effort and energy? If that makes sense, right?

[1:55:48] Defining Monetary Value

[1:55:48] Because he'd be paying me below minimum wage for my advice. Now, again, if it's a call-in, that's not a monetary transaction. There's not a charge for the call-in, so the money doesn't come into it. But when you do put a monetary value on something, that tends to define that, right?

[1:56:20] That tends to define that. And that's confusing to me. So when I was a waiter, I'll sort of give you an example. When I was a waiter, if somebody didn't tip at all, I'd say, well, maybe they don't need to tip or whatever. But they don't know they have to tip or they don't know it's a thing or whatever. And maybe they're completely broke. But if I had like a $200 dinner and somebody said, tip $5, that's a different matter, right? Right? Because then they know they have to tip and they're assigning a monetary value to what it is that I'm doing and that monetary value is 2.5% of the meal, which is a very, very, very low tip, right?

[1:56:58] So I will, you know, I'll put this out there. If you want to call in at, I will be happy to do a call-in show. And I'm not going to nag at you about the five bucks to do with the call-in show. I'm not, I promise. And we can totally drop that as a topic and we'll work just on the marriage stuff. But I think it's, you know, we very rarely get direct feedback from other people. The $5 are not necessarily reflective of the value he places on his marriage. What does that mean? I don't know what that means. He's saying, save my marriage. Here's five bucks. Steph, you can save my marriage. Here's five bucks. You can preserve the happiness and well-being of my children by me not getting divorced. So the sustaining of my marriage, He's also saying that he could get divorced. He's saying it's not realistic because we have kids, so he could afford a divorce. Okay, so let me ask you this. I'm just going to look this up. Let's just say he's American, right? Average cost of divorce if children are involved, right?

[1:58:26] Let's see here. The average cost of a divorce that involves children, can range from $12,500 to $24,900.

[1:58:46] So, let's say, you know, $20,000 or whatever, right?

[1:58:49] Cost of Divorce

[1:58:50] $20,000 for a divorce. Plus then he's going to have to pay child support and possibly alimony and so on, right? So the costs, he can obviously afford the cost. So he can afford $20,000 if he gets divorced, right? And it could be a lot more than that, right? So he can afford $20,000. And to save his marriage, which will cost him $20,000 to dissolve, to save his marriage, and he can afford $20,000, he offers me $5. Again, I'm not trying to be mean. I'm really just genuinely baffled.

[1:59:47] So let's see here. So if it's $20,000 to get divorced, right? Um, I have divided by, so then he's offering me 0.00025% of the cost of divorce, which which means he thinks I have a 1 in 4,000 chance of saving his marriage. A 1 in 4,000 chance of saving his marriage, which I would not want to waste his time if somebody said, you have a 1 in 4,000 chance of solving my problem. I would not take that on.

[2:00:35] Or to put it another way if would you take on a a a project to help someone for free if they said i'm going to tell you up ahead of time no matter how great your advice is there's only a one in four thousand chance i'm actually going to listen to it well you wouldn't bother with that right and if you were wise you wouldn't take that on even for a paying client right? If somebody would say to you, uh, yeah, you know, I'm, I'm going to, uh, be a, uh, I'm going to be your, your nutrition and, and exercise client. I'm going to tell everyone that I'm going to you for my diet and exercise, but there's only a one in 4,000 chance I'm ever going to follow your advice. You'd say, look, I know that's not good because you're going to tell people you're coming to me. You're going to get worse and people can think badly of me. Right? So if he only thinks Since I have a 1 in 4,000 chance of saving his marriage...

[2:01:28] Well, he's asking me, so I assume he thinks I have the best chance because he's not making arrangements to see a therapist or something like that. So I assume that he thinks I have the best chance of anyone to save his marriage. And so he's saying that even with the best possible advice, it's a one in 4,000 chance. That's not, you know, that's like save your money for your divorce, I guess, right? Or find someone with whom the odds are better. So again, call in at, just copy and paste this text. I'm really happy to talk about it. And if there's anything that I can do to help your marriage, I'd be completely thrilled to do it, especially because there are kids involved. So this is not anything negative towards the value of your marriage or helping your marriage. It's just odd to me and disconcerting and lowers my motivation considerably. Considerably, it lowers my motivation far more than if you had donated nothing but asked the question. Just so you know, it's not about the money, right? If you had said donated nothing but asked this question, I would have been happy to answer it. But if you say there's a monetary value involved in you saving my marriage and the monetary value is $5.

[2:02:46] Then that is disconcerting to me. So I just wanted to mention that and again, I'm perfectly happy to be corrected, if there's something that I have misunderstood. And again, very happy call-in at We'll have the chat. It doesn't have to involve any of this $5 nonsense. We can just do the marriage stuff, but that I'd be happy to do.

[2:03:11] Ah, let's see here. I am a married stay-at-home father of two toddler girls, and I will take them to events such as toddler story time at the library so they can interact with other children their age.

[2:03:20] Standoffish Vibe

[2:03:20] As the only male parent, and I can't help but feel a standoffish vibe from the other mothers. I think I'm the problem. My distant attitude is likely making the mothers disengaging. I can't understand why I won't take the initiative on establishing a friendly relationship with these mothers. Well, I mean, part of the PSYOP of the past half century has been that any man who wants to spend time around children is a pedophile. Any man who's around children is only doing so for nefarious reasons. This has been a massive PSYOP that has made sure that the woke agenda continues with only matriarchal influences on children.

[2:03:58] Male Interaction with Children

[2:03:58] You know, I was out with my family the other day, and there was a little boy, maybe four years old, and I won't get into the details because it doesn't matter, but he came up and immediately just started chatting with me in a very friendly, positive, and engaging way. And of course I answered him politely and had a nice chat with him and so on right and then later we met up with him again he glommed on again really wanted to engage with me really wanted to chat with me and you know very friendly and positive with him back and then I said this it's really sad.

[2:04:39] It's really sad.

[2:04:44] Right that this young boy with a single mother, But it's so desperate for male attention that he'll just talk to strangers and show his need. That's really sad. It's really tragic. Getting fathers away from children has been foundational to the expansion of political power. We understand that, right?

[2:05:18] So be friendly be positive it's not people's fault that they've been psyoped I mean they're responsible for learning better but it's not their fault they've been psyoped, someone says I can empathize with you Steph this is an example of crazy values we put on things in our lives, yeah I mean this guy probably the five dollar guy he's probably out you know buys a latte or coffee in a donut or something like that. And he's like, yeah, that's great. But the saving of his marriage, I'm going to put a monetary value on it. And that monetary value is $5.

[2:05:59] Now, of course, if he had, and people do, right? They email me and they say, I'd love to pay you for a call-in show. And I say, I don't take money for the call-in shows. And then they say, well, I'll pay you a lot of money, but it has to be private. And I'm like, no, no, sorry. That's not the way, not the way I do it. I know that sounds odd. I know that sounds odd, but it's not the way I do it. The purpose of the call-in shows is to help the world. and yeah, people have offered me a lot of money for a private call-in show. No.

[2:06:39] I also can't be as good when it's private because one of the reasons that the call-in shows are so great is because, I know it's helping the world as a whole. That summons the very best within me. Thank you for the insight with these mothers others I tipped on the platform, but it didn't appear. Thank you, Steph. I appreciate that. If it didn't appear, it probably didn't take. You can always tip, of course, at slash donate. All right. Well, listen, guys, thank you so much for a great show. Sorry again about the quality of my voice. I'm doing what I can to repair it all, and I'm sure it will be fine soon. It's only been a week. So have yourselves an absolutely wonderful day. Lots of love. From here to you, slash donate. If you'd like to help out, we'll be promoting the shorts soon and don't forget to sign up at for a great community you can sign up at slash freedomain for another great community, and I love you guys so much for bringing out the best in all of us lots of love and I look forward to hearing the guy with your marriage stuff let's absolutely talk and lots of love take care I'll talk to you soon bye.

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