0:01 - Introduction to Modern Relationships
0:40 - Gender Roles and Parenthood
7:37 - The Dynamics of Caregiving
19:52 - Beauty Standards and Expectations
25:02 - Economic Insights on Trade
26:51 - Military Strategies and Human Costs
29:51 - Conclusion and Appreciation
In this lecture, the speaker explores the complexities of modern gender relationships, particularly focusing on the roles of men and women in parenting and working dynamics. The discussion opens with the speaker addressing the challenges and nuances that arise as traditional gender roles evolve. With the decline of platforms like Skype, the speaker also signifies a transitional phase, emphasizing adaptability in both personal and professional realms.
Delving into societal expectations, the speaker references popular tweets that critique women's choices regarding career and motherhood. The central question posed is, "Who is going to raise the children?" This serves as a foundation for discussing the divide between career-driven women and the traditional expectations placed on men as providers. The conversation reflects on the contrasting approaches necessary for successful career management versus parenting, highlighting that while a professional career often necessitates a proactive approach, caring for children is inherently reactive due to the unpredictable nature of young lives.
Through personal anecdotes, the speaker illustrates the failed attempts at balancing responsibilities, such as watching the film "The Last Starfighter" while managing the needs of children. This emphasizes the chaotic reality of caregiving, where spontaneity overrides planning. As the speaker recounts experiences of being a stay-at-home dad, they underline how caregiving involves navigating various emotional and physical challenges, removed from the linear trajectory of career progression.
The discussion shifts to the dynamics of dating and attraction, dissecting why men pursue women and the expectations placed on both parties during romantic interactions. The speaker posits that men typically take the initiative in dating scenarios to demonstrate their proactive qualities, while women respond based on their preferences. This dynamic highlights traditional roles and the notion of assertiveness versus reactivity. The speaker further critiques current societal expectations, noting how the dating landscape often defaults to these patterns, perpetuating a cycle that may not align with modern values of equality.
As the conversation progresses, the speaker addresses cultural standards of beauty and the pressures exerted on women to conform to these ideals. The criticisms of cosmetic procedures and societal beauty standards are discussed, emphasizing that many women pursue these enhancements under perceived male expectations rather than personal desires. This narrative challenges the assumption that men dictate beauty standards and suggests that more profound societal transformations may be needed for genuine change.
Shifting to broader societal implications, the lecture also touches upon economic policies and their interpersonal effects. The speaker discusses recent trade policies and their potential consequences, highlighting the asymmetrical relationship between the U.S. and its trading partners. The commentary critiques a lack of understanding regarding economic leverage and suggests that simplistic views on tariffs and trade ignore the complexities of global interactions and local consequences.
Overall, this lecture presents a comprehensive examination of gender roles, expectations in relationships, and the challenges riddled within the dynamics of modern parenting and career. By juxtaposing personal experiences with societal critiques, the speaker advocates for a more nuanced understanding of relationships that transcends traditional dichotomies, encouraging both men and women to engage in proactive dialogues about roles in families and the workplace.
[0:00] All right, good morning, everybody.
[0:01] Hope you're doing well. So we are the fifth. This is just for donors. If you've got questions or comments, I'm certainly happy to read them. This is a test of a new platform. As you know, Skype is going away, so we're trying a replacement and see how that goes as a whole. And you can invite others if you want. So I'm just going to run through a little bit of the tech here. Well, the tech's already done. We did that. But what I'm going to do is, you know, might as well get a few thoughts in while we're here.
[0:41] And I'm trying to be patient with modern gender relationships. It's a little tricky. It's just a little tricky. The reason being so, this woman, this sort of fairly popular tweets, this one 544,000, the next one 3.3 million, and this woman wrote, women are choosing a job over their own children, but men are working hard for their families. This is sexism. This is sexism. You know, it's a really tough thing when you're starting to talk about the same standards for men and for women. So women are choosing a job over their own children, men are working hard for their families. Okay, who's going to raise the kids? It's going to come down to a fundamental question in life. Okay, who is going to raise the children?
[1:33] And if it's going to be men that are raising the children, then women are going to have to work hard. I don't know how breastfeeding is going to happen. I don't know how recovery from cesarean sections, childbirth as a whole, episiotomies, frightening to find out about, but apparently a necessary part of birth for some women. So who's going to raise their children? And that's fine. Now, if the women want to be the primary breadwinners, then they have to select men to some degree.
[2:11] For low ambition and a certain amount of, it's hard to say passivity, a certain amount of reactivity is probably the best. So when you're in a business career, when you're running your career, you have to be kind of proactive, right? You have to seek out your mentors and you have to, study outside of just your job, and you have to push for your raises, and you have to push for your promotions, you have to compete with other people, so you have to be really, really proactive. Now, parenting, a lot of times, is reactive. And so, if you want to be the primary breadwinner, then you have to be proactive to a large degree and.
[2:56] Whoever is going to be raising your children has to be more reactive, right? Because you really can't plan your day when it comes to having, let's say you have a bunch of kids under the age of six. I mean, obviously there's some things that you can do to plan, but a lot of it has to do with, did they sleep well? Are they under the weather? What is their mood like? And what is your mood like? Did you get any sleep? Like you're just kind of managing, you're not really proactively pursuing a major goal because you're just in control of far fewer of the variables, right? When you are a primary caregiver to children, and I say this having had a very assertive, if not downright aggressive career over the course of my life and also having been a stay-at-home dad, you are in control of far fewer variables when you are a primary caregiver to children. I say this, of course, I mean, I sort of mentioned this story years ago, but The Last Starfighter is a movie I've never seen. I've only seen bits of it. I wanted to see it because, you know, it's video games, science fiction stuff. But what happened was when I was working at a daycare, I worked there for the whole summer. We took the kids all over the place and it was a great deal of fun. Really, really loved those kids.
[4:09] And we went to go and see the movie The Last Starfighter. And so naturally naturally i told the children ahead of time uh hey uh anybody who needs to go to the washroom let's go to the washroom right now uh make sure you go to the washroom because you know otherwise you're going to miss parts of the movie which i meant was i'm going to miss parts of the movie so i planned to watch the movie and i watched almost none of the movie why, because i got this tug on the sleeve so-and-so needs to go to the bathroom okay they're taken into the bathroom anybody else need to oh no no we don't need to go to the bathroom we can come back 10 minutes later so-and-so needs to go to the bathroom so uh it was just a constant not so i plan to see a movie, couldn't see a movie, right? So, that is just the reality of being a caregiver. You are reactive, not proactive. Now, if you want to know why men ask women out and women say yes or say no, it's because the man, and why do men pay? So, the reason that a man asks a woman out is the man is showing that he is proactive and the woman is showing how she reacts.
[5:21] Right because the man being a career guy even if you're just a hunter or a farmer you've got to be very proactive you can't just be reactive right you got to go hunt you can't just be reactive so when a man asks a woman out he's saying i am proactive i pursue what i want and the woman is reactive she chooses from she chooses yes or no if the man asks her out and of course if the The man asks her out and the man pays for the date. He's showing obviously resources and so on. And she's showing hopefully grace and looking good and putting effort into conversation and being a good conversationalist and polite and grateful, right? Because if a man is providing, if the woman is not grateful, then it's a bad situation. It's a bad relationship. So that's why men ask women out. Because men are showing how proactive they are and women are showing how graciously reactive they are because parenting is mostly reaction. Definitely when you're young, it's mostly reaction. I mean, you may say to your kids, it would be good if you learned a musical instrument, but I mean, if you're a peaceful parent, for sure, you have to be reactive. Do they have any interest in music? And also what kind of musical instrument do they want to play? They might try, obviously, guitar or piano or heaven help you, drums or trombone. So you are reactive.
[6:50] Because it depends upon what your children are into, what they're focused on, what they're pursuing, and whether you can maintain their enthusiasm, because kids can start off very enthusiastic about something, and then that enthusiasm can fade away. I mean, when my daughter was young, she composed on the piano. She wrote like tons of stuff on the piano. I thought it was actually pretty good and pretty nice, but then she lost interest in the piano and got into other things. Then she was really into writing stories. She was really into, she animated a bunch her movies and wrote and animated, wrote, directed and animated a bunch of movies. And then she became less interested in that. She's going through a writing phase at the moment, which hopefully will last, but we'll see, right? So you're just kind of reactive.
[7:37] So if a woman wants to be a primary caregiver, then she needs to signal that she's assertive, maybe even aggressive and absolutely proactive right she needs to signal that and the man needs to signal that he's gracious in his reactions that he uh is is uh that he will look good for her that he will be a good conversationalist that will be very grateful for her generosity and all of that kind of stuff to signal that they're going to be a good team so if women want to be the primary caregivers, then women need to start selecting for reactive, somewhat passive relative to the aggression or assertion that's needed to pursue a career. They have to start selecting for more passive men, and they have to start being more proactive in selecting for more passive men, which means, of course, women need to ask men out, and women need to pay for the dates.
[8:38] Because that's how you select the person who's best at staying home and raising the children, right? You can plan your career. You can be proactive in your career. You can manage your career, but you can't plan for much when it comes to kids. I remember, um, taking a bunch of kids, uh, for pizza and, uh, just, just trying to get the kids to agree what should go on the pizza, was Byzantine, right? It was a crazy complex negotiation. So you just have to be kind of reactive and manage all of that. So then women need to select for reactive men, proactive women need to select for reactive men, which means women want to ask the men, need to ask the men out. And the men need to look pretty for the women and be good at conversation and be grateful for the, right? But women don't want to do that. Still, 90% of dates are the man asking out, and the woman has the expectation that the man pays. Now, again, this is sort of pointing out that this is kind of hypocritical, is kind of inevitable. It feels kind of inevitable.
[9:48] But nonetheless, this is where you see things really occurring. This is where you see things, what is really going on for people. Like I watched the movie Baby Girl because I'm kind of fascinated about what women find attractive and appealing these days. And of course, this is a hard-driving female CEO of an Amazon-style company. And then she can only have sexual gratification by being ordered around by a tatted-up intern, like being ordered to lick milk off a bowl on the floor to be ordered around. That's the only way that she can get sexual satisfaction. And then she has one daughter who's hyper-masculine, one daughter who's hyper-feminine. And this is just how it seems to go, that she has all of this dominance, but deep down she's yearning for submission, right? Now, we can argue is this right or wrong, good or bad, but I mean, trust me, man, they don't sink tens of millions of dollars into a movie and get, you know, genuine movie stars like Antonio Mendez and Nicole Kidman. They don't do that without doing a lot of research and figuring out what is attractive for women. Of course, they're a little bit. They're chasing the Fifty Shades of Grey stuff, but that's just reality. That's just the reality.
[11:14] So, yeah, men are working hard for their families, yeah. And women are choosing a job over their own children. Well, they are, because somebody's got to raise the kids. Somebody's got to raise the kids. All right, so then this other woman, Lauren, Gotham's Hitty, I suppose. She posted this as a very big tweet.
[11:38] Uh somebody posted is this before slash after convincing enough for you to get botox and this is a woman who took the botox it's a black woman she took the botox and she can't make any expressions right so she's trying to look surprised she looks the same right she's trying to get snarly she looks the same right so the practice and she wrote the practice of paralyzing facial muscles to mute our natural expressions is, I think, a way patriarchal beauty standards erase women's individuality in favor of constructing a docile or docile feminine existence.
[12:18] Oh my gosh. So after, I don't know, Mary Shelley Wollstonecraft, Vindication of the rights of women, 150 years, 170 years, let's say 150 years. So after 150 years of feminism, women are still blaming men for their own decisions.
[12:42] Now, I don't think I've ever met a man who prefers, have you seen these glow-ups, like a woman who looks kind of natural, and then she gets a glow-up, and the glow-up is, you know, puff-adder, lip-filler, it is, you know, really streaked hair, wild amounts of makeup, and she goes from, you know, sort of fresh-faced local beauty to kind of weird, cute-y, sex doll robot face. And you actually can see this happening in some of the MAGA women as well. It's just not, it's not appealing. It's not attractive. It's not attractive. So the idea that it is men who are demanding Brazilian butt lifts and the men are demanding these weird stuck in a pool drain pillow lips, or that a woman can't make any facial expressions to remove a few wrinkles from her face. I've, I've, and again, I'm sure maybe there are, I don't know, porn-addled men out there who just say, well, this is how it has to be.
[13:50] But I don't, I don't see it. I don't see it. I've, I've never really experienced it. I've never, um, I mean, I've done thousands of call-in shows with people who are having, you know, these sort of major issues in their life. I've not once had a call-in show with a guy who says, I'm not, I'm no longer attracted to my wife because we're aging.
[14:19] That I'm not seeing. Or I don't want to kiss my wife because her lips are a normal human volume, right? I mean, lips do thin out over the course of life, which is why the pillow lips is trying to reach for youth. A woman who's with a husband who loves her for her virtues does not need any of this crazy stuff to be attractive. I mean, obviously, you need to stay in shape and relatively healthy, and all of that gives you kind of a glow, I think, that's really attractive and appealing.
[14:58] But my wife and I played sports with friends for two hours last night. I mean, she's as healthy as they come and beautiful to me. So the idea that men want this stuff and women just have to acquiesce, this was an old Kevin Samuels thing when he was talking to the women in the black community, right? So he was saying like, men have been asking forever. Men have been asking forever, don't be overweight. Well, women are just overweight. Men have been asking forever, just have your natural hair. And black women have these weaves, like they cut their hair totally short and then they weave in this fake hair that is not particularly appealing to men. And there's a variety of other things he asked for, but, and he was saying like, you're just not providing it. You're just not providing So I think that women want to look a certain way, and they believe that that is really attractive to men. Yeah, the nails too, and all of that kind of stuff.
[16:00] I mean when women walk around in heels and then complain that their feet hurt and and heels can actually do quite a bit of damage to your feet as far as i understand it i don't think there's been a single man who says i'm not attracted to my wife because she's not tottering around in these impractical heels that tends to be for for other women right and and i I understand the Botox thing and the pillow lips and, you know, like boob jobs and stuff like that. I mean, I find that artificial stuff. It's just like it turns my stomach. I just find it absolutely repulsive because to me, it shows a pathological insecurity and making up for a lack of virtue. Right. Because if you're a virtuous and noble and kind and gracious and courageous and all that, that's just about as attractive as as things can get. So makeup, right? I mean, it's obviously not why it's called that. But to me, makeup is I'm making up for a lack of virtue. I'm trying to be more physically attractive so that you'll overlook red flags in my personality. Makeup to makeup for moral deficiencies. That's what makeup is for, to makeup for moral deficiencies.
[17:17] So, I find Kevin Samuels, again, is a late great YouTuber. He was constantly asking women, women would say, I want a high-value man. A high-value man, right? A man in the top 5% or 7% of income. And he would say, what do the high-value men want? High-value man can pick from 20 women who all want him, right? Particularly if they're older. So, if it's all the patriarchal beauty standard, okay, that's fine. So then, he asked women, hundreds or thousands of times, he asked women who want the high-value men, what do the high-value men want? And the women had no idea. The women had no idea. So if you were running a um a magazine for for women who wanted to settle down or whatever then your articles would not be about selling makeup but it would be about i mean that would obviously be part of that to some degree but the articles would be about.
[18:34] We've done a survey here's what the men that women want want from women You follow me? Here's an article. We've done our research. Here's what the men that women want, want from women. Do they want aggressive boss babes who make that, I really hate that face, that, you know, that, that riot girl face, that tank girl face. You know, I don't even know, you know, just sort of the growl face or whatever it is. You know, men don't want that. I mean, there's a big debate on Twitter about somebody saying that a man would want sort of a calm, polite, even shy woman over an aggressive boss girl, a hyper-aggressive or hyper-assertive career woman. Why would you want that? I mean, if you don't want kids, that's fine. But the people who don't want kids are not generally part of social discourse because they have no long-term investment in the future. So they're kind of hedonists, right? And people who don't want kids are people who can't have kids. People who don't want kids, they're just not really part of the social discourse as a whole.
[19:52] So as far as I would believe all of this stuff about patriarchal beauty standards, if women were very curious about what men actually wanted. Now if women were just like here do you want me to get pillow lips do you want me to get, buckle fat removal do you want me to get a boob job do you want me to get a brazilian butt lift do you want me to to get uh you know crazy hair weaves and extensions or whatever it is right do you want excessive makeup do you want you know that dead-eyed smoky-eyed robot face thing right and, what do men want well I would believe that women were following patriarchal beauty standards if A men had power much in society and B if women were constantly asking men what they want but let me ask you guys who were here right.
[20:54] I'd respond to these questions. Can you not do that? Yeah. So have you ever had a woman ask you what you like to see? What do you want to see? How do you like me to dress? What kind of shoes do you want me to wear? How much makeup do you want me to wear? Do you want me to dye or streak my hair? Do you want me to get Botox? Like, have you ever had a woman who you have some sort of relationship with, probably either explicitly romantic or somewhat romantic or potentially romantic, more than just roommate, brother, sister, friend zone. Have you ever had a woman ask you how you want her to look? Someone says, oh, James says, I never had anyone ask me that. I haven't dated anyone. that went to those extremes, though. No, no, I mean, so you've never dated a woman who uses a lot of makeup? Yeah. But never had anyone ask how they wanted her to look either. No, no, no, right. So is it a patriarchal beauty standard.
[22:14] If women aren't asking men what they want? No. So then who is it for if women aren't asking men what they want. And the other thing too is that you could argue that there was more of a patriarchy when women needed male resources in order to survive, but now that women can get mostly male tax money through the redistributive welfare state of various kinds, welfare, I mean, all of the transfers of goods and services from men to women, they don't need men for that. So they're liberated from that. So just to switch gears for a sec. And the other thing too, you know, if you're in a relationship with a woman, ask her what, how do you want, how does she want you to look, right? It's important. A couple of other things. I just, this is more of a short test, but I did want to drop by and thank you all for giving me this test and add a little value here and there. Somebody wrote, so Trump is starting a 25% tariff on products from Canada. Remember, Canada currently imposes tariffs of up to 270% on products from the U.S. Funny how the media does not cover that. In the 1800s, writes James Al-Tukar, he wrote, in the 1800s, 97.5% of all U.S. Revenue came from tariffs. This is government revenue. Almost 100% of revenue came from tariffs.
[23:38] Now in the chart of inflation from 1800 until now inflation was all about zero for almost the entire 1800s so they're going to say oh my god well the tariffs are going to cause inflation well maybe in a sort of pure free market maybe maybe they would have an effect because it wouldn't be a pure free market if it was tariffs but the problem is of course if you're engaged in trade with china and China massively subsidize its industries. And China used, in a recent three-year period, China used more concrete than America used in the entire 20th century in a three-year period. Like, it's insane, right? So if a foreign country is massively subsidizing an industry, that industry is going to destroy your local industry. Now, that's one thing if it's a relative free market. However, of course, if the government is now financially responsible for all the unemployed people got unemployed and insurance, they got a welfare, things like that, then subsidizing your own industry is now an act of aggression, if not downright economic warfare against, the other country's treasury, because you knock out their industries by subsidizing your own. And then the government gets hit with all the costs of the unemployed people.
[25:03] So, yeah, inflation was almost zero for almost the entire 1800s, even though almost 100% of all U.S. Government revenue came from tariffs. Just facts, right? So, Clint Russell writes, important stats to evaluate the trade war.
[25:22] Sorry, I shouldn't laugh, but it's kind of funny, right? So, Canada generates one-fifth of its GDP by selling into the U.S. Mexico generates more than a third of its GDP by selling into the U.S. The U.S. Generates just one-fiftieth, two percent of its GDP by selling into both. Trade wars hurt everyone, but Trump has the cards and he knows it. This will increase consumer prices, no doubt, but it has the potential to drive both Mexico and Canada into a depression, which is why they're panicking. Trump intends to use this to negotiate border security and to bolster domestic industry. Will it work? To be determined, but don't let people lie about who has the leverage here. The U.S. economy is the golden goose and the whole world knows it. Yeah, I said this week, it was months ago, that access to the U.S. Market is the biggest value in the world. So yeah, 20% of Canada's GDP selling into the U.S., 33% Mexico selling into the U.S., U.S. 2% selling into both. So it's not even close. And this is why I think it's been really frustrating for Trump, knowing that they've got all this leverage and people aren't doing it. They just aren't, aren't, aren't, I'm sorry, leveraging the leverage, aren't deploying the leverage, right, if you have leverage.
[26:52] Somebody wrote to Mike Madrid wrote, this is a very big tweet from a couple of days ago, I can't think of a better military investment than spending $175 billion to eliminate half of Russia's military capacity without a drop of US blood.
[27:06] Oh, these hawks. Oh, these hawks. This to me is a fundamental test of empathy or understanding and processing the foundational existence of other human beings. I mean, these are real people who are being slaughtered on this barely moving front. It's a real human being. And if it's like, well, I can't think of a better military investment, right? Spending $175 billion to eliminate half of Russia's military capacity without a drop of U.S. blood. Oh, man. I mean, and this is also, I mean, this is another IQ test for me is, okay, let's say that half of Russia's military capacity has been eliminated. Let's just say that. I don't think that's true, but let's just say that. Okay. So what will they do? Well, they'll go to robots. They'll go to drones. They've got a lot of great engineers in Russia. So if you eliminate half of Russia's current military capacity, they'll come back with a different military capacity that may, in fact, and probably will be better.
[28:18] So just this idea that you change a variable and they don't get to change a variable, right? This, this is, again, to me, this is like selfishness, narcissism, sociopathy, like, well, only, only I am in control of these variables. And I can change the variables, right? Spend 175 billion to eliminate half of Russia's military capacity. I can change a variable, but Russia can't change a variable. Russia can't adapt. Russia can't have its own response. That to me is just complete narcissism. Not like, hey, so if I do this, what's the other, what are other people going to do, right? If I do this, how are other people going to react? This is basic sort of public choice theory, right? Which is okay. So let's say, well, there's a small number of poor people. We'll just give them a bunch of money and then we won't have any poor people. And it's like, okay, but how are the behavior of poor people going to change if money gets handed out like candy? So even if you could like eliminate half of Russia's military capacity, they will simply adapt to a different military capacity that is going to be kind of different.
[29:37] Uh, right. It says, uh, Tyler says, Daryl Cooper made a great point on that. Russia is now the only battle-tested power in a peer-to-peer war. They can replace soldiers and equipment, and now they have modern warfare experience.
[29:52] Well yes so they've got to adapt their strategies to real world conditions and uh that's going to be wild i mean it's sort of like well um we don't have because we have nuclear weapons that means there will no longer be any war or social conflicts but that's not how it works war and social conflicts switches to fifth and sixth well fourth and fifth generation warfare which is about degrading institutions and demoralizing the general population and then all of the other things that are going on as a result of that or the depopulation thing so if you can't fight people with nuclear weapons you simply infiltrate their culture and convince the women to forego having children and you take them out that way so it's like oh nuclear weapons means the end of war it's like no no no it doesn't mean the end of war just means it shifts to a different a different thing it's a strange it's a strange thing that that people just don't think well if i do this what's the other what's the other person going to do what are other people going to do if i do this, and i just find that yeah i mean yeah fifth generation what right now yeah i'm jack because the guy to go to for that kind of stuff all right so i just wanted to give this a test i think the technology is working well and i'm very glad of course you are donors so you get to skip the donation pitch and i really do thank you of course for supporting the show.
[31:13] As a whole. And I thank you guys for your support. Thank you for dropping by this morning. And I hope you don't mind if I put this out to the general population, but it's nice for people to see what's going on with the donor shows. And I appreciate everyone's support. And we will see you tonight at 7 p.m. For our usual Wednesday night live. And lots of love from up here, my friend. Take care. Bye.
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