WHY WOMEN DONT APOLOGIZE!

Locals Questions Answered!

Prioritizing family, debunking homeschooling myths, promoting critical thinking, and mindful conversations.

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Brief Summary
In this episode, we discuss prioritizing family over friends and challenge the notion that homeschooling hinders socialization. We emphasize the importance of critical thinking, independent thought, and questioning imposed beliefs. The role of parents in teaching social skills is highlighted, and the need to consider the potential harm of false beliefs when engaging in conversations. Overall, this episode encourages prioritizing family and embracing curiosity.

Chapters
0:00:00 Wanting to be a stay-at-home mother and homeschool lots of children
0:00:11 Desire for a non-traditional lifestyle as a woman
0:04:10 Money and success become less important with age
0:07:13 The purpose of human life is to increase morality
0:10:00 Sensibly questioning the value and purpose of life's goals
0:10:03 The Gap Between Ideologies and Biological Essentials
0:14:09 The Perception of Career Women as Already Married to Their Jobs
0:16:50 The Struggle of Building a Family with a Career Woman
0:20:03 The Challenge of Dating a Workaholic Lawyer
0:21:18 The Importance of Priority in Relationships
0:29:59 The Obsolescence of PowerPoint and Society
0:32:28 Debunking the Myth of Homeschooling and Socialization
0:38:38 The Challenge of Convincing People about Education Standards
0:39:55 The Trauma of Pointing Out Parenting Flaws
0:42:32 The Consequences of Living a Life of Lies
0:45:46 Women's Trouble Admitting Fault in Modern Relationships
0:49:49 Men and mistakes: Constant reform after screw-ups
0:52:37 Men's experience of forgiving and joking about mistakes

Long Summary
In this episode, we delve into the topic of prioritizing time with family over friends. I assert that it is not morally wrong to put our spouse and children first; it is simply a personal choice. We address the criticism directed towards homeschooling, particularly the argument that it hinders socialization. However, I challenge this perspective by questioning the definition of socialization. I believe that social norms can be learned outside of traditional school environments and that we should encourage independent thought and curiosity rather than blindly accepting misconceptions.

Emphasizing the influence of emotionally charged language and programmed beliefs in society, I stress the importance of true confidence through questioning and reasoning. It is vital to be critical thinkers and challenge the ideas and beliefs imposed upon us.

During this part of the podcast/show, I discuss my approach to engaging in conversations. I express my inclination to ask more detailed questions both in emails and during live streams, as I strive to delve deeper into various topics. I am particularly curious about others' experiences with school and socialization, acknowledging that not all schools are detrimental but highlighting the negative aspects that many individuals have encountered.

I place great significance on asking questions rather than attempting to sell the idea of homeschooling. By doing so, I aim to help individuals connect with their own negative schooling experiences. Furthermore, I address the misconception that socialization can only occur within the confines of traditional schools. I emphasize the role of parents in teaching social skills and question the idea of entrusting random children with the responsibility of teaching our own children socialization.

Acknowledging that people may become defensive when their beliefs are challenged, I stress the importance of considering how invested someone is in their convictions and the potential harm caused by their false beliefs before attempting to change their minds.

Reflecting on my own commitment to truth, I understand the difficulties individuals face when admitting deception or ignorance. I touch on the contrasting ways in which men and women handle mistakes, noting the societal influences that contribute to these differences.

In conclusion, this episode explores the need to prioritize family, encourages critical thinking and independent thought, challenges preconceived notions about homeschooling and socialization, and highlights the importance of questioning imposed beliefs.

Tags
prioritizing, family, friends, homeschooling, socialization, critical thinking, independent thought, questioning, parents, teaching social skills, false beliefs, conversations, curiosity
Transcript
Wanting to be a stay-at-home mother and homeschool lots of children

[0:00] Good morning, good morning to you. Hope you guys are doing well.
Questions from freedomain.locals.com. Come on out to join the community.
Don't be alone with your thoughts.
Desire for a non-traditional lifestyle as a woman

[0:11] Share with others. All right.
Woman writes, Hey Steph, would it be wrong of me to want to be a stay-at-home mother and to be provided for, to be able to raise and homeschool lots of children, not need to work a nine to five and spend my days raising my children, spending time my husband when I meet him one day.
I will of course pursue my hobbies, volunteer to the community regularly and when they're grown up perhaps work part-time as a counsellor, something that helps others.
But is it wrong of me to now, even though I'm single, not want to work a nine-to-five?
And when I have a husband not want to work a nine-to-five as I really wouldn't like to work 40 hours a week and I'm happy earning less money and spending more time doing what I enjoy.
Thank you Steph. Now it's a funny thing you know this is a bit of a difference between in Le Man and Le Femme.
Men rarely question the morality of their basic desires.
I mean for better or for worse, this leads to some good and some bad in the world of course but I don't think I've ever met a man who's like, well this is my deepest highest desire.

[1:17] Assuming obviously it passes basic moral checks which everyone I know it automatically does because they're good people.
But for men, the idea that you would say, is it right or good or okay for me to follow my greatest heart's desire?
Now, for women, it's a little bit more this way, love you for it, I think it's great, you know, that sort of moral questioning is important, but it can be a bit paralyzing.
Sometimes men need a bit more restraint in their desires, and sometimes women need a little bit less restraint in their desires. Of course, my friend, my lovely friend, of course, it is absolutely right for you to want to do this.
It's absolutely right for you to want to do this.
It's not only right or okay, it's good. It's good.
There's so much to talk about in what you've said, I've sort of in my head tried to organize it, to limit it to just a few things that make sense, or a few things that are the most important.

[2:19] As you get older, the concerns of youth seem foolish.
I know they're not foolish at the time, and especially if you're untutored, like if you haven't been raised well, you haven't been provided, you know, good values and love and attention and caring and all of that, But the concerns of youth fade away.
Of course, you know, when I first started losing my hair, I was like, oh my gosh, that's terrible or whatever, right?
And now, of course, it just seems, it seems kind of silly. It seems kind of silly.
Of course, I remember, I don't know, going to some school dance, I had a pimple and it was like, oh, this is terrible, you know, just things like that. It was just, it was a certain kind of, I don't know, a sort of pathetic horror.
And I'm not trying to be like non-empathetic to my younger self, but just sort of in hindsight.
I remember when I did my tour in Australia, I had a big ass pimple that's now been immortalized on video, I don't care, I don't care, I don't care.

[3:16] So the concerns that you have as a young person, I'm not saying distance yourself from them, I'm not saying don't be concerned about them because they are your concerns, But one of the things that older people are supposed to do to help younger people is to say stop freaking out It's probably gonna work out. Well Stop freaking out.
It's probably gonna work out. Well, I've read a science fiction story when I was in my teens about a guy Who gave up his pretty face for some benefit and and all of that?
Do I vaguely remember that he got some benefit like being able to go through traffic lights? or without them being in the way or whatever.
Although that may have been a friend of my father's in Africa who got a hold of one of those emergency transponders that apparently changed lights ahead of him and just seemed entirely wrong and bad.
But you'll lose your youth, you'll lose your looks.
Money and success become less important with age

[4:10] Your money, I mean, assuming that you have enough to live on, your money and success become increasingly less important.

[4:18] And you can say, okay, but But Elon Musk…
You know, he still works, though, of course, he could retire and never work again, and for 10 generations his family or 100 generations would never need to work.
But for Elon Musk, and I know this, obviously, in my own minor way from being an entrepreneur, for Elon Musk, the drive is larger than the money.
We know that because he doesn't need the money, doesn't need more money, but he keeps working very hard.
It's for humanity, it's for his kids, It's for a mission, it's for excellence, and also it's for his employees.
When you have employees, your job becomes a lot more serious, because now people are relying on you for their income.
I mean, I remember when I was a manager, it was a software industry, so generally we hired fairly young people on the whole, and women became mothers, men became fathers.
They were building families off my code, off my initial work.
And to maintain that is important, right?
You don't want to say to somebody who just had a kid, Oh, by the way, sorry, company's not making that much money. You're gonna have to be let go.
So you start to have a responsibility for others.

[5:28] And for most people, like most of us, I'm not gonna be Shakespeare.
We're not gonna be world-shaking figures.
And the purpose of life is to increase morality.
But certainly the purpose of human life is to increase morality because morality is one thing that we have that no other species has, at least in our world.

[5:52] So since humanity can be good and humanity is the only access virtue has in the universe to manifestation, the purpose of life is to increase morality.
Now again, most of us can't be Plato or Socrates or Jesus or people who speak to the moral halls of mankind with great and thunderous and often destroyed voices but we can be parents.
We can create good by the having and raising of moral children.
That's how we participate in the most essential aspect of humanity which is the raising of children. My daughter is.

[6:33] So wonderful, and so much fun, so funny, and so good.
I mean, she has for quite some time been engaged in moral debates with her peer group, with her friends, and she's just gonna bring a lot of good to the world, and of course she's already brought a lot of good to the world simply by being born and raising the stakes of moral discourse for me, right?
So So, the adding of virtue to the world is the purpose of human life, and by far, by far, by far the best way to add virtue to the world for almost all of us is to have children.
The purpose of human life is to increase morality

[7:14] Now, I know of course you're listening to this saying, well, Steph, you had a fairly good ability to add virtue to the world.
And it's like, yes, yes, I do have some peculiar and particular skills in that area, but the virtue that I add to the world has been vastly increased by becoming a father.
I have some suspicions in general for philosophers without children.
Philosophers without children are usually not possessed of the kind of love for the future that would have them take on the most difficult and essential of topics.

[7:48] I mean Socrates had children and I'm talking philosophers not religious figures.
So what you're looking at, is it okay, you say, is it okay if I raise children in a peaceful, beautiful, moral, enjoyable manner?
Is that okay as compared to grinding away on some stupid spreadsheet in a nine-to-five job that no one's going to care about?
Because there's a funny thing about the modern economy. Like nobody knows really if their jobs are even real.
I think we get a sense of it deep down. Are our jobs real?
Or how many of our jobs are mandated by ridiculous government requirements and threats of lawsuits and…
Regulations and initiatives and like how much of it is real.
I've been not just fortunate, although there's some fortune involved, but I've had a good career as an entrepreneur because everything that I have done I know to be real.
Companies usually have a mandate to reduce waste and not pollute.
It saves the money, it's good for the environment and it's good for publicity and so on. So it is, it's a real thing.

[9:07] Philosophy, of course, is the most essential thing, which is why I've stuck and stayed with this one for, ah, coming up for 20 years now.
So you might have a job and you don't even know if that job is real.
Is it driven by actual customer demand or some government requirement or threat or problem or whatever it is?
Is it defensive against legal issues and so on.
So I think people kind of deep down know whether their jobs are real or not.
And to give up real children for a made-up job, ah, it's kind of tough.
It's kind of tough. So not only is it okay, and look, I appreciate the sensitivity if you're asking about the value and purpose of your life's goals.
Sensibly questioning the value and purpose of life's goals

[10:00] A very sensible thing to do.
The Gap Between Ideologies and Biological Essentials

[10:03] But the other thing, of course, is that a man, increasingly, and like we have all of these ideologies and we have all these instincts, right?
And the ideologies are the shoulds and the biological essentials are the is.
Should, is. Now, should versus is, it's good. I should lose weight, I is fat. I should exercise, I is unmuscular.
So, the should and the is is fine, and that's the great gap into which ideology rushes.
Nature abhors a vacuum, and if you don't have a purpose, you are easy prey to ideology, which is why ideology follows the destruction of morals, values, objectivity, and universality.
The postmodern revolution always leads to ideology, because if you don't have a purpose, you can be easily programmed with a purpose.

[10:56] It's easier to program a blank slate robot than it is to try and alter the programming of an existing robot.
I have been a maintenance programmer with million lines of code and it's very tough to untangle all of that stuff and change it. Writing new software is relatively easy.
So what happens is when men and women get into their 30s, men start to think not just, I mean successful men and reasonably successful men, they start to think not of can I get a cool new toy, can I finish some other level on some video game that will be forgotten five minutes after I finish it, can I make a little more money, can I sleep with another woman, like all of this R-selected transitory nonsense, they start to think about the larger arc of their life, the purpose of their life, it comes creeping in in your 30s.

[11:49] I mean when I was in my 20s I dated not much but a little bit around the age spectrum. When I got into my 30s I was like ooh dating older women is a problem.
If I want to have kids and I do want to have kids, dating older women is a problem.
And you just start to think of that of course the biological clock is ticking for women and the problem is of course we've really cut ourselves off from the wisdom of the elder generations.
I mean there's a whole number of reasons for that we can talk about another time, but basically it's occurred because of two things.
One is that we've been told to judge the older generations negatively.
You know, they're out of touch, they're distracted, they're silly, they're foolish, they're bigoted.
Right? So we've been told to denigrate the knowledge of the older generations, that's sort of number one.
And number two, well, I'm not sure how much knowledge the older generations really have to offer, because they themselves were programmed and often foolish and made bad decisions like putting their kids in daycare.

[12:51] After the almighty dollar and so on, right?
And the older generation has, I mean, they have really a choice with the wisdom that they've accumulated or they have a choice on how to spend their remaining years when they've accumulated more than a few such as I have.
The older generation has a choice and what does the older generation's choice consist of?
Well either you deny vainly, right?
You vainly attempt to deny your own mortality by pretending that the next generation is fundamentally flawed, or you try to instruct the next generation on the often hard-won lessons of your choices.
So if you're an older single woman, you didn't have kids and you're sad about it and you regret it, then you either talk to young women about how to avoid your mistakes or you double down and call any young woman who wants children foolish.
People who've made bad decisions are the source of our greatest salvation or our greatest damnation, because they're either going to teach us about the wisdom they've learned from their errors or they're going to try and program us to repeat their errors so they don't feel as bad like they've made really singular mistakes.
The Perception of Career Women as Already Married to Their Jobs

[14:09] So men in their 30s will chase money less.
There was a show where a woman was speed dating, right?

[14:20] And she was a lawyer. And she would speed date with some guy for six minutes.

[14:27] And she would say, I'm a lawyer. And he'd be like, 34, 35, or whatever it is.
So she'd say, I'm a lawyer.
And then the man would be like, eh, okay.
And he would he would move on right he would move on and she was of course very frustrated by this very frustrated oh my gosh like women men just can't handle strong independent successful career women with money and right.

[14:54] And it's like, well, no, it's not that at all. It's not that at all.
It's that a man in his mid-30s is starting to look for legacy, family, kids, all that kind of good stuff, right?
And if the woman is a lawyer and she's 35, well, she's going to be too busy to date, too busy to court, too stressed, and basically she's married to her job and no sensible man wants to build a family off a woman who's cheating on her central partner.
Her central partner of course being her boss.
A man, you can say this is right or wrong, but I'm telling you this ladies, a man looks at a career woman as already married to another man because she's serving another man, she's doing the bidding of another man, she's devoted to another man, another man gets her time, attention, resources, and another man will be higher priority than her potential partner, right?
So a man knows that, and again, the woman could have a woman for a boss, I get this, it's just a general way that it's evolved is that often it's the man who's the boss.
So what's going to happen is some guy is going to, you know, maybe he's going to date some 35-year-old lawyer, and what's going to happen?

[16:10] He's going to say, let's go away for the weekend, and she's going to say, I have to check with my boss or they're gonna say let's go away for the weekend and then she's gonna get a call from her boss and her boss is gonna say I need this amicus brief done by Monday you're gonna have to count on and she's like I've got plans for the weekend he's and he's gonna say like I'm sorry but this is what the customer demands you're the only one who knows the case file you have to do it I need you that we the court date got moved I need you to prepare this witness I need like and so what's gonna happen is the man's gonna try and make plans with the woman and then the woman is going to answer to another man.
The Struggle of Building a Family with a Career Woman

[16:50] The woman is going to answer to another man. In this particular sitcom it was all males.
That this woman, she became partner. Okay, so you become partner and a man will experience a woman devoted to her career as being loyal to another man, not him.
And you can say logically blah blah blah. Well, I mean, it is a real thing.
It is a real thing that she is loyal to, she's already taken.
Like, your body is going to experience this, your gut, she's already taken.
Like, evolutionarily speaking, right?
She's got a, I mean, they actually refer to this like work husbands, although that's more contemporaries and so on, but the work boss, she's already taken.
And a man is going to experience a woman's devotion to her male boss as she's already married, she's already taken.

[17:44] And of course, nobody tries to build a family with a woman who's already married, especially in your 30s, right?
This woman's 34, 35, and she's taken. She's taken by her career.
She's already under the thumb, under the command of another man.
And men have an instinct to shy away from that.

[18:03] And of course, the other thing that he knows is, I mean, you can't build a family with somebody who's already taken, at least it's a foolish thing to try, right? You can't build a family with somebody who's already taken.
So he's going to feel like a man who's trying to impregnate a woman who's already married.
Like if you impregnate a woman who's already married, you are in for a total shitstorm of a life, right?
If she keeps the baby in particular, right?
Because now, what's she going to do? Is she going to confront her husband and say, I'm pregnant by another man?
The husband's going to be enraged, angry, frustrated. it's a dangerous situation throughout a lot of human history to impregnate another man's wife, or she might stay with the man and pass off your child as his child or she might leave him and then you've got a big mess and a problem and you've got to try and raise a kid while she's reeling from separation stress and trauma and there could be legal stuff and so impregnating another man's wife is a mess, obviously.
It's a huge mess and men don't want to do it.
And a man perceives a woman who is under the beck and call of another man to be already taken.

[19:20] Now, so basically she'll have to quit her marriage in order to be with him.
Now, of course she's not going to quit being a lawyer on the prospect of dating some guy.
So what's going to happen as the man sort of plays it out and this is a gut thing it's not just a head thing like it's a gut thing and the abandonment of the gut is necessary for ideology.
Ideology goes in direct opposition to evolution and so you have to separate people from their instincts in order to program them with self-destructive nonsense, right?
And so a man's gut says when he… what does he do? He sits across from the table and I'm telling you all of this so that… sort of pointing you away from this kind of stuff.
So he sits across from the table of a woman.
The Challenge of Dating a Workaholic Lawyer

[20:03] Lawyer who's 35 and he says, okay well I want kids.
I want kids now. What's it gonna be like having kids with a lawyer who's 35?
Well it's slow dating because she's married to her job.
It's slow dating and I remember this from my 20s.
I had a fairly short relationship with a woman who was a workaholic and I would say let's get together this weekend and she would be I mean, half the time she was like, no, I have to work.
And of course, part of me was like, really, you have to work?
I mean, okay. I mean, it wasn't like she had some major job or whatever.
And part of me thought, well, geez, is it real? Does she really have to work or she just have some other guy that she's dating or something like that?
But she did work. And of course, I felt less important than her job.
And why did I feel less important than her job? because I was less important than her job.
Right? Again people can say whatever they want but you judge you judge their priorities by their actions and if she did her job on the weekends rather than spend time with me then her job was more important than I was.
The Importance of Priority in Relationships

[21:18] No man and no woman, right? For women, it's a little easier for the man's job to be more important than her in the short run because it's the man's job who pays for her and the kids, so she needs that ambition.
But for men in particular, if a woman has a consistently higher priority than you, then you can't pair bond.
And actually some years later, I met her. I was reading Dickens in a coffee shop and she happened to be nearby and I said hi to her, asked her how her life was going.
Is I guess quite a number of years later.
Still single, still working, no kids, not even a boyfriend.

[21:55] Books fading. It was very, very sad. I mean for me, right? Very sad.
So if you say I want to commit myself to my husband and my children, then the man's commitment is obviously there because he's gonna have to work to pay for his wife and his kids, but that's what you're buying immortality.
I mean if there was a pill that gave you immortality, wouldn't you do a lot to buy it? Well you have that pill, it's called children!
Immortality is your kids. They live on and you get to transfer the greatest gift of the universe which is moral life to new entity or entities.
So a man is going to look at you and say well that's great.
I mean a quality man, a man who knows himself, a man who knows what he wants.
Now again, kind of young, I'm talking about men in their 30s, please I'm not saying wait till you're 30s, I'm just saying that you want to avoid this situation.
And of course, the man, again, the six minute date, looking across as she's a lawyer, attractive, she's a lawyer, she's 34, six minute date, and he's like, you gotta move on, right?
He's threatened by, that's just made up, right?
Rather than saying, what is it that the man doesn't like about me being a high-powered lawyer and 35 if he wants to settle down and have a family, she just makes up an answer. Well, you're just threatened by an intelligent blah blah blah woman, right?

[23:17] Oh, it's very sad. It doesn't make up stuff. It's a superstition.
It's a cult of justification.
The reality is he wants a relatively peaceful life.
He knows, so as the partner in a law firm, she'd probably make at least a quarter mil a year, probably closer to 300, maybe 350.
So if he wants a mother for his kids, she ain't quitting.
Unless maybe he makes a million dollars a year, but of course a man whose reason to be attractive who makes a million dollars a year, who's in his 30s, is not looking for a lawyer who's in her 30s.
He's looking for a younger woman who's going to raise his kids.

[23:56] Because she's going to quit, and all the time she's devoted to her career, she hasn't devoted to having a stable relationship.
I mean, like it or not, and this is a bitter truth, man, it's a bitter truth, and I faced it in my 30s, and if you're dating someone in his 30s or in her 30s, the simple sad fact Next is that this person has an adult's worth, almost, an adult's worth, almost, of failed relationships under their belt.
So 18 to 36, 18 years.

[24:32] That's raising a child to adulthood. So 18 years, 15 years, they got a decade and a half or more of failed relationships, which means that they're well-trained in not trusting.
They're well-trained in failure, they're well-trained in things not working out.
Now, of course, it could be the case some entrepreneur might have 15 years of failed businesses under his belt and maybe the next one works, and maybe he's learned his lesson. So it could happen.
Come on, I mean, if you want to invest a million dollars in some guy and he says, yeah, I've been an entrepreneur for 15 years, well, how many of your businesses have succeeded? Oh, none of them.
Well, how many? This is why the number is important, right? The body count is important.
Body count is number of started businesses, right? Just think of this in economic terms because economics is pretty important to having kids, right? To having a family.
So if a woman says, well, I have a body count of 30, then she's an entrepreneur asking for a million dollars from an investor while saying she has 30 businesses that have failed.

[25:38] Failed businesses. I've spent the last 15 years starting businesses and all 30 of them have cratered.
Would you invest a million dollars? Because now she's asking for a commitment.
She wants to settle down, right? Go settle down, right?
Go find someone to settle down with. Now I'm ready to settle down.
Well, and with her own time and money or his own time and money, things have failed.
So she says or he says, I have self-financed 30 businesses over the past 15 or 16 or 17 or 18 years. I've self-financed all these businesses.
They've all failed, but now I want you to finance my next business.
Well, if you blew your own money, why wouldn't you blow mine?
Are you going to be more careful with my money than you were with your own?

[26:26] So of course, a man looks to a lawyer in her mid-30s, is she going to give up a quarter mil a year and her entire career to raise my kids?
No. Okay, so then there's going to be a lot of stress, a lot of tension, a lot of racing against traffic, a lot of daycares, and it's just an artificial situation.
So he doesn't want that.
So anyway, it's kind of funny, right? So the woman, after she gets rejected by a bunch of guys for being a lawyer, she says, I'm a stewardess, and then she gets dates. Now why is that the case?
Because a stewardess in her 30s is not making much money.
A stewardess in her thirties has not been particularly successful and this is, I mean, at money, who cares about that stuff, right?
In terms of the difference between that and raising kids, right?
So a stewardess in her thirties is looking to quit. She's not going to miss it. She's not, like, she's done with that. She's done.
In danger of becoming a sky fossil or a galley hag or whatever they call these aged air hostesses or whatever.
So she says do it, right? So then men are like, oh, now I'm interested.
And she's like, oh, so they just want a less intelligent, less competent, less like, no, no.

[27:39] Men don't want that. Men don't want less intelligent or competent women, especially the men that she wants to date who are successful.
If the men want to settle down, they want a wife who's gonna be happy to run the home and raise the kids.
I mean deep down, instinctually, right, in the gut.
And she's bitter of course too, right? She's bitter because she thinks that men who don't want to settle down with her when she's married to her job already and won't, right?
I mean seriously, if someone came up to this woman, this lawyer in her 30s, and said to this woman I got a great guy for you, he's married and he's not going to divorce his wife, he's never going to leave his wife.
Do you want to start a family with him? He's never going to leave his wife.
She would say, well of course not, like don't insult me.
Why on earth would I want a man who's already married, never going to leave his wife. It was Hannah and her sisters.

[28:44] Carrie Fisher was, played a woman in love with a married guy.
He's never going to leave his wife, he's never going to, she was tortured by it, right?
So, yeah, got a woman in her 30s and I say, oh, I got the perfect guy for you.
He's married, he's happily married, he's ferociously happily married, he's never going to leave his wife. Do you want to start a family with him?
And she'd be like, well, no. Come on, right? So she's just lacking sort of basic human empathy and so on, right?
So, no, the fact that you know what you want when you're young is great.

[29:13] And knowing what you want when you're young, rather than having to painfully learn the lessons of your 20s and early 30s, as so many of us had to do who were raised indifferently or neglectfully or badly, which is to say not really raised at all, which is to say we raised ourselves, which has strengths and weaknesses, but not to be recommended as a whole.
You get originality, but it's duh as hell.
So, if you are in your early 20s and you're a daily guy and you say, yeah, why on earth would I want to work wrestling digits on a screen under fluorescent lights for 40 years when I could be having and raising wonderful children?
How could Excel and PowerPoint compare to heirs and offspring?
The Obsolescence of PowerPoint and Society

[29:59] PowerPoint quickly becomes obsolete and obviously more slowly, so do we. We need replacements.
Now the good news about that is that saying that you want to have a family when you're young is going to generally filter out people who have bad families.
Who have good families, the parents will say to the kids, it's probably better to have kids young, and if you want to have a career and you're a woman, that's great, you know, have kids in your early 20s and then you can start having a training for and having your career in your mid-30s if you want, when the kids are close to adulthood and it's fine, right?
You can have all of that and then you've still got another 30-40 years to work if you want, so they'll say have the kids first, right?
I mean the government and the propagandists will always say have the kids later because that means fewer, if any, kids and more taxes paid to the government and so on, right?
But so they have good families, they have access to wisdom and they will not like roll their eyes at what you're saying.
The people who roll their eyes, you just want to be a broodmare for some patriarchal, it's like, okay those people have bad families and they've been raised by propaganda, so I applaud, I applaud.
All right, what do you think of the practice of guy-girl days where the men, women go out with friends of the same sex without their spouses.

[31:15] I mean I have friends, care about my friends, but it's not a huge amount compared to time with my wife and time with my daughter, time with my family.
And I think it's important to have friends of course, friends are helpful and and you can chat about things, but for the most part like honestly 95-99% of your communication in marriage is with your spouse, with your kids, and very little of it is with your friends.
I mean compared to like what happens with your family.
So friends are important.
I can't think of the last time that this has happened, but if my wife wanted to go out for a girl's thing it's like okay, but generally she'd rather be home with me.
And if there was some boys night, generally if I have the choice.
Spend it with my family. So, I mean, I think it's, I mean, obviously it's no violation of any marital vows, it's no violation of the non-aggression principle or anything like that, so I mean there's nothing morally wrong with it at all.
I just, in general, if given the choice as a whole, and again, 95 times out of 100, I'd just rather spend time with my wife and my daughter.
Debunking the Myth of Homeschooling and Socialization

[32:28] All right. How would you explain homeschooling to someone who thinks that kids need to be a school slash daycare environment in order to be properly socialized?

[32:36] Well, I would point out that they don't know what they're talking about, but I wouldn't do it directly, right? It's kind of rude, right?
You don't know what you're talking about.
What I would do is I would say, oh, that's interesting. Can you tell me what you mean by socialized?
Well, you know, they just get used to various social norms, right?
Oh, what social norms do you want them to get used to?
I don't know, sitting in a row, only answering questions when they're asked, holding up their hand to go to the bathroom and so on, right?
Like, okay, so you want them to sit in rows, not say anything, and hold up their hand if they need, and ask for permission if they need to go and pee.
Is that what you mean?
Do you think those are good social values? To not speak until you've spoken, to have to ask permission for basic bodily functions and so on.
Isn't that a little bit like prison? I mean, you wouldn't want your kids to go to prison so they learn how to be socialist, right?
So what are the social values that you want them?
Well, they learn to listen, they learn to obey, and so on. I'm like, well, is that really a great social value?
I mean, of course, we can think of countless times in history where listening to those in authority and obeying them mostly without question has led to some pretty bad things.
So I would just ask them, and you know, you don't have to be rude about it.
I mean, you can be genuinely curious because, You know, there's nothing that says confidence like curiosity.
There's nothing that says confidence like curiosity.

[34:04] If you… You don't have to sell them on homeschooling.
You have to ask them to define what they mean.
Like this is not a secret, I think, that we all don't know, but it's just important to remind ourselves and remember this.
Most people are just repeating nonsense they were told by others.
They're not thinking for themselves.
They haven't deeply thought about these issues.

[34:29] Line in the movie Room with a View. Well it just shows you haven't thought about these issues at all.

[34:36] And it's almost really striking. Or there's a great line from an old Alan Parsons song from a great album called Pyramid. How can you be so sure?
How do you know what the earth will endure?
How can you be… I remember that, sitting listening to that as a teenager, and I got goosebumps when that song came on, that line, how can you be so sure?
How can you be so sure? Okay, so most people, they haven't thought at all about these issues. They haven't thought deeply.
What they've been told is that kids who are homeschooled don't learn social skills.
Kids need to go to school to be socialized, right? They've just told that.
It's like a mantra, like it's a magic phrase that they use to banish thought and curiosity.
And most people live most of their lives simply repeating emotionally charged language programmed into them by others who don't have their best interests at heart, to put it as mildly as humanly possible.
They haven't thought through these issues at all. They don't have any perspective.
Like all the people who are like, you know, Ayn Rand, the characters are so artificial.
They don't, haven't thought that. They haven't experienced it directly.
They haven't reasoned that from first principles. They haven't got any clue why they're saying it.
No clue why they're saying it. They read it somewhere, they heard it somewhere, they just repeat it.
The pretense of thought is the essence of modern soullessness.
People have been denied the capacity to think for themselves so that they can be programmed with power-serving conclusions which emotionally and intellectually and morally completely empty and bankrupt.

[36:01] More powerful than curiosity when it comes to the transmission of confidence.
I'm pretty confident that I can do useful things in these call-in shows, as are other people, which is why they call in, which is why I'll spend an hour to an hour and a half just asking questions.

[36:16] I mean I could riff off the email, but no, I actually want to know more, want to know in more depth and detail. I do this in live streams too, I want to know in more depth and more detail.
So just ask, oh that's interesting, what did you read about that or what's your definition of socialization?
And did you enjoy school yourself, right?
But it's the power of propaganda is it can actually completely erase the most miserable 12 years of a lot of people's life, which is being stuck in some social programming viper's nest of ideology known as a school, right?
Not all schools are bad, of course, but you know, majority of them.
So just say, oh, did you enjoy school? Right, what was your experience did you ever get?
Bullied and so on, like there's a higher proportion of sexually molesty teachers in public schools than there are priests in the Catholic environment.
So, you know, were you ever bullied? Were you bored?
Were you touched inappropriately? I mean for a lot of women too.
I mean I remember when I first came to Canada and the game in grade six was chasing the girls down and punching them in the groin.
Oh yeah, they're getting socialized. God, it was appalling, absolutely appalling.
I have been brought to hell.
It certainly wasn't happening in England. The colonists are vicious.
So, you know, just out of curiosity, tell me about what were your school experiences like?

[37:43] What social skills did you learn in school that you still practice?
Just curious. I mean, don't sell people on stuff, just ask them questions.
I mean, if you really care, and it's really about the kids, you do what's best for the kids, right?
So I wouldn't explain homeschooling, I would just ask questions.
Because you have to get them in touch of their own dislike of traditional, well, Prussian-based education.
John Taylor Gatto critiqued weapons of mass instruction type education.
If they never get in touch with how much they disliked school or they were bullied or they didn't learn any social skills, if they can't get in touch with their feelings, there's not much point instructing them on the abstracts, because the feelings would just reassert themselves.
And the other thing too is that people don't like to be exposed.
People don't like to be exposed.
And so, I mean, in an adversarial situation where you have an audience, that's fine, right?
The Challenge of Convincing People about Education Standards

[38:38] But on sort of one-on-one conversation in private where the future of kids is at stake, people don't like to be exposed.
So if the person doesn't think there's anything wrong with Prussian educational standards, then you have nothing to sell them.
Then you're like someone, you're trying to sell a car to someone who's perfectly happy with his existing car. I love my car, my car is great.
You should spend $100,000 on a new car. like they just won't buy it because they think their current car is great.
People don't like to be exposed so they say nonsense like, well kids they need to learn socialization and they won't learn that at home.
Right, like there's no socializing that happens at home, right?

[39:21] Would you let children teach each other algebra? No, not certainly the same age children.
How do you learn how to socialize? You learn how to socialize through your parents.
You wouldn't let a bunch of one-year-olds teach each other language, would you?
So when they talk about socializing, what they're talking about is not teacher-child, because that's much better with parent-child.
It's not teacher-child, it's peers.
So what they're actually saying, if you sort of break it down, is a bunch of random kids should teach your child socializing skills.
The Trauma of Pointing Out Parenting Flaws

[39:55] I need to teach my kid piano. So what I'll do is I'll lock my kid in a room for six hours a day with a bunch of random kids and a piano.
That's gonna work out great!
I mean come on, it's so… but because it's so ludicrous, pointing it out is gonna be very traumatic for people. Because you're not just pointing out one thing, you're pointing out everything.
You're not just saying, oh you repeat this line about socialization because you've been programmed to and you pretended to know something which you don't at the expense of your kids.
Because without a doubt it's not like their conscience will rear up and join you and they will get very defensive and aggressive.
I have been in the fortunate position of not having harmed people with lies over the course of my life in general. I mean I'm sort of post childhood or whatever right?
I mean I guess I've told some little lies here and there they've not been particularly really harmful and I've really striven to go for the truth, right? To spread the truth.
So if you've been the same and you've generally been reasonably honourable with your pursuit of truth and so on, then you haven't harmed people through falsehoods.
Now, the people who are sitting, maybe they're 30, right, and they've got a kid who's approaching school age and they're like, well, you've got to send your kids to school because of socialising, learning to socialise with kids.
Okay, well, they've probably been talking about this for the last 10 years and they've probably influenced dozens of parents to send their kids to school. Oof!

[41:20] If you can get someone to march 10 years in the wrong direction, the odds of turning them around are very low.
It's all that regret. And that's just them, right? If it's other people that they've harmed, are they going to go back to the 20 parents or 20 families that they may have influenced through their own immediate family, through friends, through, right?
Are they going to go back through all the, like, all the times where they've rolled their eyes and said, oh, those homeschool kids are weird.
Kids got to learn social skills, they got to learn how to fit in, school is great, right?
Homeschooled kids are bizarre and they believe in creationism and right so, every time they've rolled their eyes they've influenced and put out there that kids should be put into this sit-in-a-row ask for permission to pee Prussian educational quote educational system so when I try to change someone's mind I always try and figure out how much they've got invested in their lie and it is a lie and the lie is not does school teach socialization or not that's not the lie the lie is that they've said it without ever thinking about it.
They've repeated it and inflicted it on others and influenced others without ever thinking about it.
They've had the pretense of knowledge that has done great harm to those around them and the children.
So are they going to turn around? Are they going to turn around?
The Consequences of Living a Life of Lies

[42:32] Well, it's not common. It happens, but it's not common.
But the other thing too is that, just so you understand, it's not about the kids and socializing and it's not about school is about everything.
If somebody's bullshitted their life surfing on the bloody foam of the pretense of knowledge, that's everything.
It's their job, it's their marriage, it's their friendships, it's their hobbies, it's everything.
Everyone around them has let them get away with surfing on the bloody foam with the pretense of knowledge for decades.

[43:07] Admits, I've been bullshitting, I've been repeating nonsense as if I know what I'm talking about.
The moment somebody says that, you understand, every thread winding through their house of cards gets viciously pulled and everything comes down.
Everything comes down. This is why people fight so hard.
A man who lies and pretends he has knowledge and virtues that he does not possess, well his wife married him because of that, which means she's that way too.
Can you reshape a family founded on lies and the pretense of virtue and knowledge?
Can you reshape that into a truly virtuous union? What are the odds?

[43:50] It's like coming out of a coma not knowing how to fly a plane, in the cockpit of a plane careening to the ground and thinking you can land it safely, waking up admitting a lack of knowledge is death to everybody who's built their life on lies.
Which is why truth-tellers get killed so often, right?
It's self-defense for the false self that lives on lies.
And it's the fear of the loss of status that comes when someone has to admit that they've been lying about things they claim to know, right?
Which is a kind of a moral crime. How comfortable do criminals feel when they're exposed in court?
If someone claims to know something, let's say it's a dinner party, right?
Let's say it's a dinner party, and you expose someone as not knowing what they're talking about, they will get incredibly aggressive because you are destroying their income, their status, their self-respect, the respect of those around them.
They're humiliated, rejected, scorned, abandoned. It might threaten their entire marriage, probably will.
You're taking everything away from them and they will react very, very aggressively.

[45:05] Some guy who's broke is about to get a job as an engineer for $200,000 a year and you then say to the guy who's about to hire him, he's not a real engineer, he's kind of a hobbyist but he he faked his degree.
How angry is that guy gonna get with you? Some woman has an affair, you tell her husband, he divorces her.
I mean, she would want to hunt you down for the rest of your day.
I'm just saying, it's tricky and it's challenging.
It may be worth trying, but it is extraordinarily risky and just be aware of the stakes.
I'm saying, oh last one, let's do one more.
Women's Trouble Admitting Fault in Modern Relationships

[45:46] Why do women in general have trouble admitting fault or wrongdoing in modern relationships.
Why do women have fault, have trouble admitting fault, in modern relationships?
Well, the simple answer to that is that most modern women are raised by women.

[46:05] Women are raised by women.
They either come from single moms or female-dominated households.
They go to churches which are female-dominated or female mindset dominated.

[46:19] I mean, can you imagine going to church and getting an accurate history of the Crusades? No. It's all touchy-feely, goopy-do-goody stuff, right?
And, you know, they go to school and most of their teachers are females, at least up into high school and then they probably avoid some of the harder maths and sciences which are often taught by men.
And their peer group up until the time of their mid-teens is usually female.
So they're pumped full of a massive amount of vanity.
I mean the most certain way to destroy relationships is to pump children full of vanity to the point where they kind of bit fault and become shrill and terrible, aggressive, naggy, hostile, impossible to live with.
So religion, most religions, are founded on and central to their teachings is instructing men about female evil.
We can think of countless examples of course.
To instruct men about female evil is one of the essential tasks of religion. Why?
It's not because women are more evil than men, it's because male evil is pretty obvious, right?
Women are twice, half the size of men and women are vulnerable and women can't fight back and women have a great treasure, like sexuality, that men want to gain access to.
So women, you know, looking up at men's nostrils from mid-teens onwards, knowing how big and strong they are, male evil, male threat, male danger is in your face, it's obvious.

[47:48] Female evil is more subtle, more difficult to detect, more challenging, which is why religion, they say, oh, he just keeps putting down women, keeps nagging at women about the It's like, well, yeah, of course, of course, because you can see a lion, so you don't need to be instructed that a lion is dangerous.
You can see a lion, it roars, got big teeth and claws. You may have seen it take down someone.
So we're instructed on male evil just by opening our eyes or male danger, let's say.
But female evil is a bit more difficult, right? And think of how long it took for people to wash their hands and get bacteria off and blah, blah, blah, right?

[48:22] More people were killed by a lack of hygiene that was easily achievable than all the wars in history right?
The wars in history are big and dramatic bacteria on your hands is not. So…
Grow up raised by other women and a culture that pumps up their vanity to the point where they would never ever need to admit that they're wrong.
Women are the new hyper-inflated aristocracy of the modern world.
Now, the king doesn't need to admit fault. The king doesn't apologize. The king is never wrong.
The pope, the high priest, or whoever, the witch doctor is never wrong, will never admit fault because to give people excess power means that they don't have to apologize which means you you can't love them you can't live with them and because they can't get love they pursue power and because they pursue power they can't get love it's like the truly vicious circle.
Now men as a whole we have to find a way to accommodate mistakes and rehabilitate relationships Why?
Because we're constantly screwing up.
It's like, every time you go hunting, most times you miss. You throw a spear, you write an arrow, most times you're gonna miss.
Right? I mean, even really good baseball players don't bat a thousand.
Like, even the top pro athletes don't bat a thousand.
Men and mistakes: Constant reform after screw-ups

[49:49] I mean, Dickens wrote 54 novels or something like that, and only a dozen of them or so are considered classics, so even he's batting, like, I don't know, a third.
So, men, we make mistakes all the time.
Like you can't have a sports team if, whenever the, like a baseball team, whenever the catcher doesn't catch or the hitter doesn't hit or somebody screws up a base run or whatever, right, and somebody tries to steal a base and gets caught out, say, that's it, you're off the team, like, we're never talking to you again, you're ostracized, like, men can't do that because we constantly have to reform after screw-ups, after mistakes, after errors, right?
Do you see what I mean? We constantly have to reform after screw-ups.

[50:37] They're hunting some deer with your buddies and somebody messes up, steps on a twig.
Well, you can't just never go hunting with them again. You can't just ostracize them. You can't just attack them.
You can't just trash them forever, which is why men are constantly testing each other with insults to make sure that the bond is strong.

[50:54] So a man has to be able to say to another man, you totally screwed up, you idiot.
And the other man has to be able to handle it and roll with it and come back and get better.
Because the stakes are very important. it's whether your children eat or not, it's whether your family survives or not.
So men face situations of constant failure and need to find a way to forgive and reform, which is why men will sometimes even have, like you look at sort of boys, they'll have fistfights and then they'll be okay, they can be friends again, or at least not bitter deadly enemies.
But women of course in the mothering of children, they can't screw up because screwing up gets your kids killed.

[51:35] Like screwing up throwing a spear means you're kind of hungry maybe you got to go hunt another thing or whatever but you're not nobody's dead right usually right if you keep doing it I guess people get pretty hungry but you can always get nuts and berries or whatever it is right eat less right so the stakes for women who are there to protect toddlers from death the stakes for women screwing up are way higher like if if a man is inattentive on a hunt and doesn't throw a spear at the right time you may be a little hungrier and you got to hunt some more or whatever right but if a woman says to another woman, I need you to watch my toddler because I got to go pee and that other woman doesn't watch the toddler and the toddler falls into the fire and dies, well that's pretty high stakes.
So women have to be less forgiving of each other because the stakes of what the women are doing every day in terms of keeping people alive, little toddlers, the death magnets of little toddlers alive, so women don't go, it's a whole range of exceptions, but women in general don't go through the process.

[52:30] The process of mess up, learn to forgive, mess up, fix it up, mess up, make amends.
Men's experience of forgiving and joking about mistakes

[52:37] Men do it all the time. And we all know this, right? We all know this.
I mean, as men, right? Women don't usually have that experience of, yeah, I kind of messed up, but, you know, people got mad at me and then we laughed about it the next day, right?
And men will signal to another man who's messed up that he's back in the fold by joking about his mess up, right?
Remember that time you threw the spear and you'd almost hit Bob and then instead of the deer, right, ha ha ha, right?
Whereas the stakes for women are so much higher that women don't, can't have this, well, you let my toddler fall into a fire, but hey, you know, things happen, right, ha ha ha, that's not like, so women tend to be a lot more ferocious in the maintenance of standards and values because they can't afford to mess up and they all rely, evolutionary speaking, and they all rely on each other to keep their kids alive.
So it's a combination of sort of modern vanity-based propaganda programming, but also just the fact that the stakes for women are way higher.
I mean, hunters live a relatively carefree life relative to raising kids.
And this is one of the, you know, I guess great insights or values that I had from being a stay-at-home father, which I want to share with you, in part because it's valuable, and also in part because it was your generosity that allowed me to be a stay-at-home father.

[53:51] But that knowledge of how incredibly vulnerable and dangerous it is to have kids and toddlers in the house.
And this, of course, even outside of, you know, we don't have half the kids dying from infection or illness or whatever it is.
So yeah, you've got to, you can't let up, like, like, you have no idea, you've no idea. You can't let up for a single second.
You're driving and you're tired, you pull over and you sleep.
You can't do that with a toddler. The toddler's up, you're up.
Toddler wakes up at 5am, you're up at 5 a.m. So the stakes for women's mistakes are way higher than men's and so women tend to be less forgiving because they're less forgiving they don't get trained in forgive and forget which means that it's tough for them to admit fault.
For a man to admit fault is a minor loss of status followed by the bonding of making jokes about his mess up.
For a woman a loss of status means she might have got some other woman's kid killed and that's it for her social life and the survival of her children and the flourishing of her children and and the reliance on female support.
So, anyway, I hope that helps. Thank you everyone for these great questions.
I will get to the rest tomorrow.

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